Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Private One Man, No Army

One Man, No Army
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

Jasper staggered his way through a back alley in the underbelly of Coruscant, leaning against the grimy durasteel wall to support himself. His right leg was broken, a few of his ribs had been broken, and one of his eyes now had a purple ring around it. Fighting four thugs at once had turned out not to be a particularly great idea, even with his new mechanical limb. Such a thing would take some getting used to. Still, he had managed to get out in one piece. What did he have to show for all of it? It was a pitiful amount really. The duelist had been trying to track down any Kyber that had been lost during the invasion of Ilum that made their way into the underworld. He had found some success, but he had found very little of what was likely the thousands of crystals stolen that day. He had been on his own for a good two weeks now. Jasper had let his hair grow out, left in an untied state and reaching almost to his shoulders. His hooded tank top was gone as well, shredded after bizarre run in with some unusual people on Denon. He hadn't been on his own like this since his exile.

The duelist's leg gave out, forcing him to the ground. He winced as he slid to the floor, positioning his legs in a comfortable position. It was manageable pain. He had experienced worse on Empress Teta, but there was no way he should be walking on it. Jasper sighed, looking down at his mechanical hand. His bionic fingers flexed open, revealing what he had so painstakingly fought to reclaim: A single kyber crystal. All that effort for a single stone. He knew shouldn't think about it like a gemstone. Kyber was alive, and he had promised the Bendu that he would help reclaim the kyber that was stripped from it's home. Still, Jasper couldn't help but feel defeated by how few crystals he had actually managed to find. He closed his hand, pulling it close to his chest.

"Don't worry," Jasper muttered to the stone. "I'll get you home."

He just needed to get himself home first.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

The colors never lied.

Someone was hurt. Badly. Iris didn't bother trying to figure out who or why, she just ran. Ran towards the colors of hurt. It'd explain itself soon enough. In sight, of all people, Jasper. She blinked as she slowed her run to a walk, just a few feet away from him. He was messed up. Why was he so messed up? Her eyes narrowed as she looked him over. Rather than ask any questions though she just stepped over, took his hand, and guided him to a bench to at least sit down on.

"Tell me what hurts." She could see a couple things that probably did. Without delay she set her hands on his arm, already using the Force to numb the pain. Slowly mend what was broken. Enough so it could be set and casted properly, later.

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

Iris had appeared in his line of sight, asking about where he had been injured. He wasn't going to ask why she was down here. Frankly, he didn't have the right to, not after what he had been doing. Jasper let out a sigh, brushing the hair out of his face. It was longer than he had thought and was taking some getting used to.

"My right leg is broken below the knee," Jasper explained, remaining calm. "My lower two ribs on the left side are fractured I think, and I think I rolled that right ankle as well. You don't need to worry about the eye..."

Jasper felt a lecture incoming, the standard "what do you think you're doing" song and dance. He really shouldn't be running around operating on his own, but the duelist couldn't shake the feeling that he still had something to prove. If Denon had shown anything to the Padawan, it was that people didn't take him seriously. And why should they? When he couldn't manage to find a master, he ran away. Nobody even knew who he was until a few months ago. It all wound up making him promise things he couldn't reasonably carry out alone. Maybe Jasper just wasn't cut out for all of this...

On that less than positive thought, he knew he had to change the subject. Jasper wasn't exactly in the mood for a stern talking.

"So... been a while," Jasper began. "How's it going?"
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

Iris already got to work. Broken ribs were dangerous. She didn't hesitate to lift his shirt and feel them over, if a bit roughly. Part of her already knew he'd done something to earn this on his own, by the guilt in his colors at least. No internal bleeding, at least. Then it was his eye. "Who here is the medic?"

He wasn't going to tell her how to do her job. Her hands moved, pressing against his face. Gently, but making sure nothing was cracked, misaligned. ".. You probably have a concussion. Broken leg is going to be it's own issue." She turned her gaze to that before reaching down. Again touching his leg, letting the Force pull the pain. Try to fix what was broken enough for him to stand on it again, anyway.

"Don't make small talk. What are you doing that's getting you this broken?"

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

Jasper winced as Iris rather roughly assessed his ribs, but he didn't let a single word pass through his lips. He was beginning to get the idea that Iris was not too pleased to find him in this state. In truth, he was lucky she had come across him to begin with.

"Don't make small talk. What are you doing that's getting you this broken?"

It was lecture time. Jasper sighed, hanging his head. Reluctantly, he opened his hand to reveal the crystal he had managed to retrieve.

"I was looking for this," Jasper told her, the tone of his voice empty. "It's just the one, before you ask..."

The padawan couldn't feel any more stupid than he did now. He had always had an impulsiveness problem, but this was easily the worst it had been. Jedi were meant to uphold peace and protect the defenseless, but not in a reckless manner. If any of the masters found out what he was doing these past few weeks, they'd surely hold him back from knighthood for another five years. What made him feel worse was the fact that Jasper knew a decision like that would be justified.

"You're gonna call me stupid," he predicted hollowly, his grey eyes fixed on the floor.
"It's okay. I don't mind."

After all, he already believed this to be true. He didn't need Iris to confirm it.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"You are stupid."

No, no sugar coating from Iris. Not with how beaten and broken he was. She continued to tend to his wounds, even opening her pack to pull out some bacta to better start fixing him up. Or at least sooth his wounds, anyway. "You came alone, didn't you? That's why you feel so guilty and foolish. You're a Jedi. You could've asked anyone at the temple. But you feel a need to prove yourself? That people look down on you? Too many of you all keep ignoring help in favor of pride."

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

"What's the point in asking?" Jasper stated bluntly.

He wasn't beating around the bush anymore. If she was going to be straight with him, the least Jasper could do was the same.

"All I've done since I got back to the Temple is weigh people down," he said, eyes remaining fixed on the ground. "I've either caused problems, disappointed my peers, or done things so insignificant even I forgot about it. I leech off of others to make up for my lack of natural talent. Even when I did think I was starting to learn something new I was just... borrowing from someone else. It's hard to be symbiotic when your a parasite..."

Jasper wanted so badly to sink into the wall and vanish. Why couldn't he ever loath himself in a place where he was alone with his thoughts? Iris had mentioned that he was too prideful. If he really was, then it was a pitiful excuse for pride. He would've preferred if his self-destructive tendencies were a product of ego. Maybe he'd be able to fix himself.

"I couldn't find anyone before I left anyways," Jasper sighed. "Oh yeah. I guess you don't know where I was before we met."

He laid the back of his head against the wall, managing to bring himself to look her in the eyes. They were foggy, but he was still managing to hold in whatever his body was so desperately trying to let out of him.

"I had tried to find a master. I wanted- Want to become a knight with every fiber of my being." he explained. "Nobody came... so I ran. I guess it's consistent."
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

Iris blinked.

Then just frowned. She focused on mending what she could so he could move freely, somewhat letting him ramble on. She was a medic, sure. But she wasn't a therapist. That wasn't the type of healing she could do, not of the mind. ".. There are a lot of Padawan's without masters. If you feel lost without one, talk to the council. They will help you. Wandering like.. This, getting yourself beat up for whatever reason, that's not going to help you, ever. And you're never alone. I don't agree with what you're doing, but really. You're never alone. We're Jedi."

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

"I know," Jasper replied. "I've always known. I'm just afraid."

His existence was such a complicated, fickle thing. The childhood isolation certainly hadn't done him any favors, though he had always questioned how much of that was self inflicted. Now Jasper had a bunch of other things on his mind, prime of which being how he was created in the first place. It didn't seem to matter to the people who knew, but what if it did at some point? Jasper had just started making friends. He didn't want to lose all the progress he had made. But, in reality, all that would do was sever what bridges he had made.

"I've actually been kinda scared to talk to you for a while," he admitted. "N-not cause you're intimidating or anything. Its just the thing that you do where you can see how people feel. I didn't want you to think I was a walking mess. It's kinda dumb now that I'm saying it out loud..."

Jasper paused, a wave of curiosity coming over him.

"What do you think of me?"
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

Scared to talk to her? Because she could see emotion?

She frowned, but it wasn't like she didn't understand. Before, no. She wouldn't have. Now? .. Now she did. Iris let out a sigh. One of exhaustion and just understanding. She'd done all she could with knitting him back together. At least now he'd be able to walk back to the temple on his own. And she could do the same. "I think you're no more of a mess than any of the other Padawans. And that you seem to think you need to be perfect in order to be respected. .. You don't. Just- Stop stressing yourself out. We're Jedi, but we're also Padawans. Still learning."

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

A warm smile had managed to spread across his face. It was comforting to hear that Jasper was just as much of a mess as anyone else. What she had said about him was true though. Jasper was fixated on being perfect to an unrealistic degree. He already knew this, but it helped to hear it from someone else's mouth.

"Thanks," he began, scratching at the bridge of his nose. "I... I needed to hear that. I'm sorry that I put all my mental baggage on you out of the blue."

She had finished healing him by this point. It still hurt, but Jasper figured he'd probably be able to walk now. He stood to confirm this, quickly assessing the various points where he had been injured.

"Thank you for patching me up. I promise I won't do anything like this again," Jasper assured her. "Can I ask you a quick favor? I... did something on Tython when we met. It was a force ability of some kind, but I haven't managed to get it to work again. I... I think your battle meditation is what triggered it, so I was wondering if you could help me get it started?"

Jasper wanted to give it a genuine try this time. So far, he had put off the idea that he was capable of learning any force abilities beyond the basic ones. He was ready to take another swing at it, but he needed that extra push. He needed help. And, for the first time in a long time, Jasper was willing to ask for it.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"That wasn't-" She cleared her throat. Closed her eyes. "That was something else. But a battle meditation might help, I guess? Before you do anything though, we should get back to the temple. Get you a trip in a bacta tank. And probably talk to one of the masters about.. This." She motioned to the crystal in his palm. Iris didn't agree with what he did, but she did agree with why.

Kyber. Stolen Kyber.

"One thing at a time."

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

"Right, my injuries and the crystal comes first," Jasper nodded. "The masters should know that some kyber slipped through the cracks..."

Jasper didn't want to imagine what terrible things were being done with the crystals that had been harvested on Ilum that day. Nobody seemed to really care that they were alive, really only seeing them as some pretty stones. It made it easier for people who didn't understand to put them through immense suffering. For some, like the Sith, the knowledge of their consciousness only encouraged them to make the stones suffer even more so.

"I think I'm good to walk," he told her. "Probably, anyways."
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

Iris nodded her agreement. And finally smiled. She'd stand up, offering a hand to Jasper to help him to his feet. She'd done what she could without exhausting herself to get him walkable. But what that meant otherwise was still up in the air. If she didn't do enough, she'd figure it out in a second, wouldn't she?

"Good. Let's go."
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

Jasper accepted Iris's help and took he hand, rising to his feet. He seemed to be in pretty good working order, despite the fact that it still hurt.

"Well, nothing's breaking again," Jasper noted as he lifted his leg to assess it, flexing the knee. "You're pretty good. I don't know if that's praise coming from me. I never understood the whole healing thing..."

He was getting off track. There were more pressing matters that needed to be dealt with.

"I'm ready to go."
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"It's about knowing what needs to be fixed and how it needs to be fixed. The Force just gives you a tool to let you, once you learn the basics anyway." Anyone could learn how to heal with the Force. That was what Iris believed. But college had helped her figure out how to better heal. With all the wars, well. She should hopefully be able to go back. Anyway. She'd go with him, following towards the temple again. Making sure he didn't up and injure himself again or that his wounds were worse than her initial assessment.

"How has your training been? Even without a master, I mean."

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

"I've been managing," Jasper told her. "I'm... not really a prodigy of any kind. I-I struggle with using the force, so I put a lot of my focus into dueling. It's been doing me well so far..."

It seemed to make up for his natural limitations pretty well all things considered. The fact that he hadn't died yet was pretty evident of that fact, especially after facing Kybo Ren Kybo Ren . Still, there were always downsides. It was always embarrassing to show less force capability than even younglings. Jasper couldn't change this fact, but that didn't mean he was fully comfortable with it.

"I fought some Knight of Ren dude on Empress Teta and didn't die," he continued. "That's an achievement enough for me."
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"Dueling. That makes sense. Practical. Useful." Iris nodded. Then frowned. Knight of Ren? He didn't mean- No. He didn't mean their Master. He couldn't, right? ".. Sometimes the most we can do is survive. Run. If it at least distracts them from hurting anyone else, it's a win. .. Right?" That was the core of her own belief. No, just an excuse for all the fights she fled on her own. She had to hope it all meant something.

".. Anyway. Maybe I can help? I- It's weird, but I've been able to help people feel the Force before. Just, it might be overwhelming."

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 
Coruscant, Underworld
Tags: Iris Arani Iris Arani

The offer to open him to the force even more was rather tantalizing. Jasper had always struggled with his ability to connect to the force, finding even simple tasks like telekinesis to be taxing. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t the slightest bit interested. The warning that it would be overwhelming didn’t much concern the young duelist. He had gone through so much stimulation this week that he figured more wouldn’t be much of an issue.

“Why not,” he shrugged. “I’ve just had the most overwhelming week of my life. A little more won’t kill me.”

It was worth a shot. If nothing else, Jasper really had nothing to lose. Not taking this opportunity now could be something that he could regret. One of those “leaps not taken” moments. If this could be the thing that finally helped Jasper improve his connection, he didn’t want to pass it up.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"It's- Ah, you'll see, I guess. Come, sit."

That was nonnegotiable. Iris had seen all manner of reactions to what she was going to do next and had yet to see someone fall from it. But she wasn't going to take any chances. The moment he did sit, Iris closed her eyes. "So, close your eyes. Breath. .. Don't freak out." That was the mantra at this point. She reached out her colors, her presence in the Force, reaching towards his own to mix and blend them. Make two perspectives one so he might see the Force as she did.

Chaos. The chaos of Coruscant, of life and emotion, in a constant swirl of different colors all around them. Colors the human eye could see, colors that had no name because no one else could actually see them. Everywhere, from everything. Hard, impossible to sort through, and with no off button. Close your eyes, cover your ears, the colors were there. Always swirling, always there, always overwhelming.

Jasper Kai'el Jasper Kai'el
 

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