Not a Hero

[Nylea Apollodor]

Hearing Nora's appreciation created a strange combinations of thoughts within Nylea. On one side, the echani was genuinely glad to hear that at the very least she was able to have some kind of positive impact on her friend's wellbeing. Yet still, doubt clouded her mind like it did at seemingly every waking moment, whether conciously or subconciously. It was the same doubt that had reared its head before not even an hour ago, one that no matter what stuck to her very soul. Even while doing all she could for the one being in the entire galaxy that had stuck by her side through not just the good times, but the bad as well, it continued to plague her.

The debt created by her past.

Despite the fact Nylea had been open about her relationship with the Dark side she had many years ago and the accepting, encouraging and forgiving words she always got in response, it still ate away at her no matter how many times she thought she had moved on. It were the exact things she had done that she simply did not have the strength for to share with anyone; not even the wandering Jedi who had awakened the Light within her was never able to open her up about it. The terrible, heinous, and disgusting acts she had committed that had rot away her innocence for good. Nobody else truly understood the weight of the guilt that rested on her shoulders, no person was able to lift it off her shoulders. It was purely her burden to bear for as long as her soul remained. No matter how much good she did, not matter how much of herself she had sacrificed for others, no matter how many times she had put herself in lethal danger to protect the innocent, it would never erase any of those things.

So when Nora found comfort in her presence, when she opened her heart to her and that her words meant something to her, it hurt. Nylea felt she had no choice but to keep that pain to herself, but tore away at her all the same. In her mind, she was still the monster had been all that time ago. It was why she regretted accepting the title she had received today, but that too was hidden from the outside world. Right now her friend needed her, and she deserved the compassion and support she so desperately needed.

"You were never given the time to process it all. It requires grieving, something that you still have to do. Perhaps the physical wounds have mostly healed, but the mental ones are still there." It was ironic coming from the echani. She knew all too well what she needed to do to make things better in regards to her own headspace, but the difference was that she was convinced she was undeserving. With gentle pats on Nora's back, Nylea continued. "Time off will do you good. We will find people who can take over your post for the time being, but if you keep going like this things will only get worse."

For as long as Nora continued the embrace, Nylea would do so as well. Even if a response was made, it was followed by a few minutes of silence to let things sink in.

"In that time off, I am going to give you one task," the woman said to break the silence. "I want you to keep a journal. Write an entry every day, at whatever time is best for you. Describe how you are feeling, the good things but also the bad things. Spill it all onto the pages. You do not have to share it with anyone if you do not want to, as long as you write an entry every day." Writing was a powerful way to reflect on oneself and how they were truly feeling. "Can you do that for me?"

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

“I- I-... I can’t take time off.” Nora said looking almost shocked Nylea would suggest that. “I am needed here- I-”

A deep sigh burst through her nose and she just let the silence linger. The idea to take time off felt unthinkable. It was the opposite of what Nora felt she had time for, and that was to say she had time for anything at all. There were orders to make, inventory lists to double check, equipment requests to evaluate, financial reports to consider, transfer requests, resignations, applications, donations, and any potential operation violations. There were so many things that Nora had to do.

Yet Nylea, as the silence broke, insisted that Nora do this. A frustrated sigh burst through the Arkanian’s lips.

“I- I guess?” She said and rose from the embrace. “But where would I go? What would I do? I give all of my time and money to the Order, I have nothing because I need nothing. It’s literally my life, and I can’t just give that up. I can’t just go away.”

“Nylea, I mean it when I say I don’t have anything else.” Nora seemed angry almost. “I can’t just leave. I need to be here for them if they need me, I owe them that.”

“I- I would be dead without the order, I would have been lying in a- a- a- POOL of my own blood, bleeding out because one of my closest friends-” She rose from the couch altogether. “-decided that I was in her way!” The anger seemed to boil over. “Because she was too weak to do what was necessary to keep this Order going.”

Nora stepped away from the couch before turning back towards Nylea.

“SHE. FAILED. EVERYONE!” A trembling finger rose before Nora as her gritted teeth began to expose themselves. “AND I WON’T DO THE SAME. I AM PROVING HER WRONG!”

“I. AM NOT. WEAK.”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

Nylea had never been one to push another into doing something. She simply let them live their life the way they wished to, only ever going as far as giving them advice if they were willing to listen. This was the first time she simply told someone to do something and as difficult as it was, she knew it was the right thing to do. Even though Nora resisted, the echani had remained calm and asked her to keep a journal. Without outside influence, the status quo would be upheld with all the potentially disasterous consequences that came along with that. As hard as it was for her to do, she had to convince the arkanian to listen to what she said for her own good.

Then, the air shifted. Nora got to her feet and as she continued to speak Nylea could see the Force around her become uneasier every passing moment. Anger rose within her, something the woman had seen in so many people in the past. Yet this time, it truly scared her. This was the very thing she had been trying to prevent, but it seemed that there already was at least some kind of damage within Nora's being. As emotions within the room began to rise, to the point where Nora even began to yell, a tear began rolling down the echani's face and as much as she wanted to hang her head low to avoid any more of it, she knew she had to say something she did not want to whatsoever and it had to be done while she looked her right into the eye.

"This, what you are doing right now, this is what led Hazel down the path she took." Nylea was hurting. She had picked up on the signs then, but had put too much faith in Hazel to overcome her demons. Now she saw the same thing happening to Nora and in that moment she felt helpless. She already was physically broken, her leg that prevented her from going anywhere betraying it, but mentally things were starting to unravel now as well. "I saw it happen, and I did nothing. I thought things would... fix themselves, somehow. I could have prevented it and now-" Her gaze did not shift, but as tears began streaming down her face it became hard to speak. "It-it was all my fault. That was why I ran, guilt did not allow me to stay then." She thought she had moved on, but now it was crystal clear that those wounds had not healed.

"I am just... I do not want to see you go down that path too, Nora. I already lost my rolemodel to my own ignorance, if I lose you too because I was not able to pull you away from it... I am already unable to forgive myself for everything I have done in the past." Trembling hands weaved their fingers together. It had come to begging. "Please Nora, please listen to me. I know this is not you. Do not do what Hazel did."

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

That was a tear. Nora froze in place. Her eyes opened wide at the sight as Nylea explained as carefully as she could that Hazel was just like Nora when she had started her own downfall. Nylea hadn’t tried to stop that and she blamed herself for what had happened. Though Nora was stuck in her frozen state. She couldn’t move a muscle, couldn’t do a single thing as the explanation moved on to begging.

Nylea was begging because of her. Because of what Nora had done to the one friend she still had around and the realization hurt far more than anything in her life had before. She was a cause of hurt in this moment, she was a source of anguish and fear. She was the opposite of the woman that she needed to be, and she had taken that out on her friend when all she wanted was to offer advice.

Nora’s mouth opened as if she tried to speak, but not a single word could part her. The tears were back. The weakness in her legs caused her to give way and fall to her knees. She felt like scum in this moment. She felt like the hollow image of herself that she was, and in truth it just scared her even more.

Maybe she should have died there. No, no that was not right.

Maybe she should have seen this coming. Most likely.

“What have I done?” Her voice hissed in a barely audible whisper. “What am I doing?”

She stared down upon her hands as if to give them a thorough look, a check for blood or filth. How much of it had she already smeared on the Lotus? How much had she smeared on herself? Where was the joy she had felt at her position once?

Eyes closed and she fell back into herself and her own mind. The stuttered breaths that blew through her nose made her growing panic all the more real. There was no peace to be found because the peace was not there, and maybe it hadn’t been for a while.

Though the tears kept streaming Nora herself wouldn’t move. She was frozen in place and on her knees in an internal plea for help that she hadn’t even known was there. The words she wanted to speak seemed unwilling to take shape on her tongue and she just remained quiet. It was probably better that way too.

The silence hung heavy in that room.

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

The Jedi way of old was a picture of a perfect being. One that was never hindered by the volatility of their emotions, but instead remained completely unaffected by them at all times. They gave all they had for another, always and endlessly. Tireless guardians of life and the Light, living their life in service of the Force no matter what.

However, it took no more than the mere silence that hung in this moment to come to the conclusion that not a single being in the galaxy could live like that and not break under the pressure eventually. Nora had repressed the things that separated her from a lifeless machine and with every passing day she did so the eventual toll it would take on her built up. Hazel had failed to address it and crumbled but, as much as it was a painful process, Nora had just taken the first step off that path. Perhaps it did not feel right or good in that moment, but it was sadly necessary.

"It is okay." Three simple words that summed up everything Nylea was about to say. With her still slightly-trembling hands she wiped the small streams of tears from her cheeks. "You wanted to give your everything to the Lotus, but with that you slowly began losing sight of yourself. Am I correct?" She began lifting her leg off the chair and went to stand up on her good leg, using what was previously her leg rest for support. "The position you fill needs others around it to assist. You wanted to do it all yourself. A noble thing, but we all have our limits. You have worked yourself to the bone and while you did so much good, you began giving up your on wellbeing for it." The echani hopped towards Nora before slowly letting herself down to the floor, carefully placing her leg on the ground in a position where it wouldn't cause any pain. She wanted to retain a similar eye height to ensure her friend knew she stood behind her.

"Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet the Force." It was a code that without a shadow of a doubt was familiar to Nora. "What I take away from that myself is that despite our goal to do good and give to others, we can only do that if that is done with a balanced and healthy mind, body, and soul. You have hurt nobody but yourself yet all it takes to heal is to acknowledge it and to change your perspective. The acknowledgement is the most painful, but at the end of it things will be much better. I promise."

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

Gods, she wanted to disappear. The floor was too solid, it needed to let her drown in a pit of dirt and sand or concrete. Nylea wasn’t too far off, Nora just wanted to do her best in every single field of the organization while neglecting to delegate. She wanted to be the one Hazel couldn’t have been in an effort to prove her wrong and show her that the Lotus was not dying, that Nora wasn’t weak and that by the next time they met — the time that Nora would truly die — it would be Nora that people missed. That when Hazel died it would be as someone few or no-one would miss.

Her eyes were darkened, the cheeks blackened by running mascara. Trails of black stood out against her pink alabaster skin with a distinct pattern that no longer highlighted her eyes as much as her cheeks. It was still hard to breathe through the unearned sobs and self-pity. Her weakness that she couldn’t let show yet knew that she needed to.

“I have failed my duty.” She whispered against the white locks that had fallen over to cover her face. “I… Failed myself.”

Her sobs grew more noticeable, her shoulders rose and sunk in a rapid yet jerking pattern as her entire frame seemed to wave back and forth against the tidal waves of her own regret.

“I am building an organization on hate and anger.” She cried. “I am building everything on hypocrisy.”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

"Nora. Listen to me."

Nylea had to bring her back to a state of clarity again. Only then would reason have a chance to prevail.

"Look at me."

Forcing herself to remain calm, keeping her own demons to herself, she did what she could to transfer that state of mind to Nora. She was not a warrior, but her strength was found in healing the wounds of others, whether physical or spiritual. Gently the echani pushed the strands of hair that covered the arkanian's face to the side, removing the obstruction from her view. The sight wasn't pretty, but if nothing was done about it that ugliness would never fade.

"Listen to me, okay? Take a deep breath in," Nylea said, "through your nose." She then waited until Nora had done so before continuing. "Now, breathe out through your mouth. Keep doing that, focus on it. Nothing else matters right now, just breathe." When in emotional distress, it was all too easy to give in to the panic and begin hyperventilating or otherwise preventing yourself from getting enough oxygen. That in turn would make matters even worse, creating a downwards spiral. This was the most important thing to address.

She then gently placed a hand on Nora's shoulder, a simple gesture to remind her she was not alone and never would be. "Do not let your irrational thoughts do this to you. The last two things the Lotus are built on are hate and anger." One only needed to look around them to see this. They still carried the same ideals and motivations as they had when the organization had first planted its roots.

"Perhaps you failed yourself. I cannot look inside your mind and see your personal goals and sense of duty." It was something only Nora could conclude. "But everybody stumbles and falls eventually. It is no more than a fact of life. The one who found me on Coruscant and brought me to the Light told me that failure is the greatest teacher." It was a wisdom she had carried with her ever since, philosophizing on what exactly that meant. "I do not see it as failure, though. That is where my view differs. Failure is not getting back up after you fall. But replace failure with mistake in that statement, and suddenly I find the truth."

Nylea lifted the hand up from the shoulder it rested on and with a curled index finger, Nylea began wiping the tears from underneath Nora's eyes. "Mistakes are part of life. People like Hazel do not learn from them. They tell themselves it was never a mistake to begin with. People like you, on the other hand," she explained, "can learn from them. It is okay to make mistakes. If there is one thing I have learned in this life, it is that people with a good heart will never think any less of you. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and see where you took a wrong turn. Do that and you will never make that mistake again. That is the very essence of life."

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

Eyes rose from the floor to look at Nylea at her command. Though the irises weren’t there it was clear that the Arkanian was miserable. A deep breath filled her lungs. At first through the mouth until instructed to do it through the nose. It made her chest rise much to the disdain of her aching heart. With a slow exhale she felt her shoulders slump. Her mouth remained opened as if she struggled to breathe this way, but she tried to repeat it once more. In through the nose, out through the mouth.

It was okay to make mistakes, it was okay to live and learn. Nora felt much the same, but about others. She was a perfectionist in her own affairs. She needed to be the best at what she did and it needed to produce the results that surpassed what people expected of her. It was unrealistic to expect but something she flet a strong urge to keep herself to.

Yet see where that got her.

“I don’t know what to say.” Nora sobbed. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Will you help them if I go?” Her eyes peered into Nylea’s very soul mirrors, her eyes. “They need someone to keep them together and organized at the very least. I know you can do that.”

“I only just promoted you but we’ve wanted you in such a position for so long.”

“I- I need someone I trust in there, and there is nobody I trust more to keep things going in my absence than you. It’s you, me, and Karl that remain from the old guard in terms of leadership.”

“Only while I am gone.”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

Even after all this time, Nylea had difficulty trusting herself. The fear of not having what it takes to fulfil her duties was always in the back of her mind, its roots found in the darkness of her past. She considered herself tainted and it led to her avoiding responsibilities as a whole, which had been done successfully up until the moment she had no choice but to accept her newly-awarded title. It was like nobody but the echani saw the risk of elevating her position, not a single being within the Sacred Lotus was ever concerned by the horrible acts she had committed so long ago.

Nora too trusted her. In fact, it seemed like she trusted her more than anyone else. Nylea almost couldn't keep herself from shunning her for it, but in the end she needed to be there for her friend. "I... I will do my best. If it puts you at ease, I will do everything I can to ensure things keep moving." Nora's wellbeing came before her own insecurities. Without the promise she would likely not agree with taking time off despite everything that had transpired, so if this had to be done then Nylea would put her own fears and reservations to the side for as long as she had to. "But in return you must promise me to not occupy yourself with anything related to the Lotus whatsoever for the time you take off." The thing the arkanian needed most was a complete step away to focus on herself and nothing else.

"Remember the Jedi Praxeum, the group I visited some time ago?" It had been a soul-soothing experience for herself and she had no doubt Nora would find the same thing there. "They are located on Eira Pechal, a planet almost no star map knows. You should go there, I am certain they will welcome you with open arms." Even someone without a connection to the Force would be able to feel the peacefulness that surrounded the planet. "It would do you well."

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

“I’ve read about them.” Nora nodded. “Jedi faction, outer rim somewhere, have done some good for the people associated with them. Supposedly want to be somewhat more of an ‘actual Jedi presence’ in the galaxy.”

It did go hand in hand with the Sacred Lotus to a great extent. Not that the Lotus was all that preoccupied with being Jedi as much as being a relief organization. Religion and relief were two different sorts of belief, and while the Lotus had roots in the Jedi faith there was at least some sort of distance to it at this point. Truth told Nora wasn’t sure she was the right person to tell what it was or wasn’t built on, but that was her belief. The Jedi belief was there, but it wasn’t the centerpiece as much as the act of healing was.

“Give me the coordinates and I will see about it.” Nora felt her spirits return. Not to any greater extent, but at least somewhat. “I don’t know if I will go there right away… But I will go.”

Though she most likely wouldn’t just up and head there immediately. There were some things she wanted to wrap up before she took her vacation. Besides, she needed to ease out of her responsibilities and show Nylea the ropes before she could go. To expect Nylea to pick up a bunch of papers and just know what to do was unrealistic and they both knew that.

“Give me two weeks. A time to get you into the system and for me to disconnect for a bit. After that I will go, I promise.” Nora felt a slight smile tug at her. “Does that sound okay with you?”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

"And from what I have seen with my own eyes, they are very good people. I have been in talks with them about teaching there from time to time." Although the Sacred Lotus and their efforts would always remain Nylea's priority, she looked forward to being able to help others grow. Being a Jedi was important to her and she deeply believed challenging one's beliefs was how one remained on the right path. Simply doing something because you had been doing it for a long time did not immediately mean it was the right thing as well.

Nora was seemingly still somewhat hesitant, but it was a great step forward if anything. Before she was finished speaking however the promise had been made that she would go, putting a smile on Nylea's face. "There is no need to rush anything. That would defeat the purpose, after all." The reason she was told Nora to take a step back for a little while was to calm down and let her stress die down, but not taking the time needed to get ready was going to have an adverse effect. "I would not even think of telling you to go this instant."

The timeframe of two weeks was given and although Nylea wasn't opposed to it in any way, she did have something to say about it. "You are doing this for yourself, not me. If you think you need two weeks, I play no role in that. Nobody has to approve anything." She wasn't going to tell the arkanian what to do, so in her mind there was no point in asking her whether it was acceptable or not. That was for Nora and Nora alone to decide. Nylea was there to support her in any way she could, but when it came to how her life was filled in she would not interfere. Convincing her friend to take the break had already been difficult enough. "But, I do think I can get used to the system in a timespan of two weeks. Just try to make sure you do not overexert yourself during that time, okay?"

"Also, could you help me up? I am in a bit of a difficult position to get up from."

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

“That’s good.” Nora smiled at Nylea’s reveal. Teaching elsewhere was a good way to spread the word of the Lotus if nothing else. As long as she was willing to help Nora with this until she felt better and could come back around to give the Lotus her all again. From the sound of it Nylea was alright with the plan that nora laid forth which made things a bit easier on that end, and two weeks was probably if anything too much time, but baby steps and room for error was important too.

And hey, overexertion was Nora’s middle name at this point. There were no promises made on her behalf in relation to the risk of running herself ragged. Of course she would try not to, but she also knew better than to actually promise that.

As for the last part, well…

“Of course.” Nora said and offered a hand up to her friend. “Up you go.”

She hugged her friend again and sighed, frown and all before she eased up.

“I will try my best to do as you say.” Nora remained rather passive. “I need to get the whole work thing out of my system before then, set up the routines for those who take over the parts of the system I don’t need to manage…”

“I will be busy for the coming weeks, and my guess is so will you.”

“Are you sure you are up for that? I don’t want to strain you during recovery.”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

Carefully Nylea was lifted up and when she was back on a vertical base, the what seemed to be the hundredth hug they had shared that day already acted as her support for a moment before hopping over to her crutches and putting them to use once more. Things had gotten to a head and even it was needed to move forward, she was glad that part was behind them. It was a confrontation she hoped to never have to repeat with anyone again and not just because it meant the one being confronted was in a rough spot.

"Let us at least agree to not put too much pressure on ourselves to get everything ready in those two weeks. If it turns out more time is needed in order to make sure you can take your time to rest as well, that is no problem." Nobody was going to tell them to meet a deadline of two weeks and there was no reason to place such a thing onto themselves. What mattered most was that Nora wouldn't do everything on her own, something that was now taken care of. Even if she continued to work for a little while longer to ensure the Lotus would continue to run smoothly, a lot of the pressure was still taken off.

At the question, asking if she was okay with taking up the work, Nylea nodded. Although she wasn't particularly fond of being in charge of anything, she would gladly do so for Nora. She wouldn't tell her, she didn't want to create any reservations within the arkanian, but she was certain that feeling wasn't going to be an issue. "Physically I am still recovering, but mentally I am well. As long as I do not have to carry stacks of files everywhere, I think I will be okay." A little joke to lighten up the mood a bit more.

With the help of her crutches the echani walked back towards Nora and while she did it was hard to miss how messy she looked. "You should freshen up. I am not the most fashionable," she said while looking at her own outfit, "but I do not think tearstains are in vogue at the moment.

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

There was no time pressure, this was true. Nora had nodded at Nylea’s remark. It would take the time they needed, and no less than that to get them both situated in their new roles. Even if Nora’s was more the act of letting a role go more than anything while handing the remaining one off to Nylea in her stead. There was not a doubt in Nora’s mind that Nylea was in fact going to do just fine, and while there would be a lot of files.

… A lot. Of. Files…

There was always someone around to ‘delegate’ it to. The perks of being an Elder. Regardless, Nora’s lips split into a laugh at the joke and she looked up from the ground to give Nylea an appreciative glance. It was good to have a friend like this, and she knew that she was lucky for it. As much as Nora wanted to hug her friend one more time she held the urge back for the sake of not suffocating her the first thing she did on her vacation.

Or well, soon-to-be-had vacation.

“I don’t think tearstains has ever been in vogue.” She smiled through the stains. “Neither have burlap sacks, but yet here we are with the Jedi fashion style of choice.”

“... Thank you, Nylea. Truly.” Nora raised her head high and gave her friend a more happy smile. “I will take a shower, get myself cleaned up and then I’ll spread the word to the people this all concerns.”

“I mean, that includes you, but it goes without saying given our talk just now, right?”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

It was good to see Nora's sense of humor was coming back to her. It lifted Nylea's spirits to see she realized there was no reason to grieve, for nothing had been lost. The ship had been put back on course before it was too late, much to her relief. "The Jedi lifestyle is all about simplicity and selflessness, after all. Fashion is not mentioned in our code, of that I am fairly certain." And, in all honesty, the main reason she was the last being who opposed they way they dressed was quite simple- she thought the robes of a Jedi were quite comfortable to wear. "But I suppose I am being way too serious over a joke now," she then remarked in conclusion.

"Good idea. I will wait here," Nylea responded before beginning to move towards the couch again. "Showers tend to clear your mind as well, for me at least. I find them to be quite relaxing. Although lately with my leg it has been less so." A smile and a nod were sent back Nora's way. "And Nora, thank you as well. You do so much for the Lotus, and probably without even realizing it for me as well. We are lucky to have you with us, and I am lucky to have you as a friend."

Before the arkanian disappeared, Nylea would ask her one last question. "And for the announcement, would you like me to be there for it? It makes sense, to me at the very least." It was entirely up to Nora, but Nylea had little against any preference. She was far from someone who enjoyed being in the spotlight, but she was going to have to get used to it now that she was going to, at least temporarily, watch over what the Lotus was doing.

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

Mentioned in the code or not, fashion was Nora’s own choice. She liked to feel pretty, and the attention didn’t feel all too bad. It wasn’t vanity, not really, at least not to any degree in which she would look down upon others for not following. Nora prefered to think of it as an interest, and Jedi quite simply weren’t as into it as she was. Nothing wrong with that.

As Nylea waited for Nora to get ready she gave her friend a friendly smile and nod to imply that the same went with Nylea. She meant a great deal to Nora too, in ways few ever really came close to. Mostly because even when she wasn’t there, she was still there. The time after Hazel was a bit spotty, but Nora had felt her presence regardless. Like a small itch insider her chest, or stomach, or mind that made her think twice about her decisions. The others joked about it, called it a bond, but since Nora was hardly one to feel such a connection… Well, it was probably just a joke. Probably.

The Arkanian proceeded to step into the refresher and wipe the smears and weight off of her shoulders and cheeks. She did do a lot for the Lotus, but there was also the limit of doing too much. Her time to take a vacation was coming soon, and when that time came she would make the most of it. Probably travel a lot. That felt like a good idea.

Stepping out of the refresher she got herself dried up and dressed up in something a bit more casual. A jacket for Lotus members to show their colors on jobs, a white jacket with sky blue details as well as an undershirt to fit neatly with the color scheme. Pants, while perhaps a bit too tight were still an okay fit she’d like to think, and as they approached she stepped out of the room she got her boots on first thing she did.

Hair still damp from the shower she grabbed for a comb and approached a nearby mirror.

“Think they’ll consider this some kind of power move?” She asked, half-joking and half-serious. “Promote you so you can take my place?”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

A Force bond between someone sensitive to the Force and someone who was not wasn't impossible, but it was limited. Nylea was definitely able to feel something being there, the simple knowledge how Nora was feeling being the most prominent aspect of it. She had felt it when the incident with Hazel happened, the stinging sensation in her stomach had set off an incredible sense of emergency which had brought her to the courtyard. This day she had felt the pressure that was on Nora's shoulders, and how it suddenly felt a lot lighter. It made things more bearable for herself as well.

Giving Nora a half-wave when she returned from her shower, Nylea began the process of getting back on her feet. It was a somewhat slow one given how careful she was not to aggravate anything within her leg. Using the Force to heal her leg would've made the process a lot faster, but she had decided against it considering the amount of work the healers had to do already following the events of Coruscant. During meditation sessions she used bits of Force Healing on herself, although her worse-for-wear state had made it difficult to focus.

"I am doubtful," the echani answered, perhaps a bit too serious in her answer once again. "With the way you had to convince me in the first place, I do not think they will assume any kind of setup." If anything, if it were up to her, this really was no more than a temporary step up. If a more permanent place was offered to her she would want to reject, even if she turned out to be of great help. She would not be able to forgive herself for saying no, but that wouldn't change her wishes.

"You know, I am glad I spent little time on my look this morning." All she had to do was dry the tears she had shed and calm down, at which point she looked much like she had before the emotional moment. It was definitely on the more informal side, but that didn't bother her.

[member="Nora Lithos"]

 

[Nora Lithos]

[member="Nylea Apollodor"]

The brush kept pushing its way through silver locks until they were all as smooth as silk with the help of a few other equipment. Her ear remained perked and attentive of what Nylea was saying throughout the procedure, but every now and then a gust of hot air would brush against her ears and drown out her friend’s response.

“Good.” Nora simply said and gave her reflection in the mirror a reassuring nod. “Yeah, well…” The arkanian girl lifted her locks with one hand to demonstrate her silky smoothness. “This feels amazing.”

The Elder approached her friend with an ungraceful lean forward.

“No seriously, touch it.” She waved her head back and forth to demonstrate the volume. “You can expect this over ragged-ponytail Nora starting now.”

Whether or not Nylea did touch the hair Nora would still straighten her back, brush the dirt off of her pant legs and look towards the door.

“Well, I guess there is just one thing that remains then.”

 

[Nylea Apollodor]

Nylea had to chuckle for a moment. Caring about one's looks wasn't a very Jedi thing to do, but on certain days even she herself couldn't help it. It wasn't much of a vanity thing for Nora but it most definitely wasn't for Nylea either, it was simply a way to care for herself. It was a difficult thing for her to do, so any avenue she could take to push away the feelings of self-doubt that wasn't harmful was gladly taken. On this day in particular however, she hadn't been much in the mood to spend time on it. "I do not doubt it does. I have simply been a bit lazy today, to be entirely honest." Besides, the only thing she had planned on today was meeting with Nora. A public appearance in any way had not been on the agenda, even if this was going to be the second time today. It seemed her timing on her lazy day was poor this time around. On the other hand, however, her crying had not ruined anything. She supposed it went two ways.

"Hmm, that is indeed quite smooth. It definitely fits you," the echani responded as she used her hand to confirm what Nora was claiming. Although, in complete honesty, the sloppy ponytail that had been the standard for some time now was not difficult to trump. "It would be a good thing to see it more often. You instantly look very professional, too." It did her well to see the small bits of change that were already showing. "I like it."

Nylea had to take a breath, knowing what was coming up next. She had never been responsible for anything major before so it was going to be a difficult few weeks, but it was for Nora's sake. "I will be right behind you. You know, I cannot really open the door all that easily." The attention was drawn to her crutches to complete the picture. "Or close it, for that matter."

In a few moments, her duties would be expanding by a large amount. "I just hope they will trust me enough."

[member="Nora Lithos"]