Nepenthe

[Nej Tane]

Moments should last forever.


He laughed a bit, wrapping his arm around Ayessa. "Yeah, I mean- we all make mistakes. But I was good enough to pin you as a Jedi." That was only because Nej almost activated the lightsaber, right into his own face- but that was besides the point. "I prefer the term gunslinger- ne'er-do-well adventurer. But I'd buy that story for a few credits, just saying." Which would probably be up Nej's alley, considering he read....at a very low level compared to most of the galaxy.

There was nothing but the gentle sound of the rain and the distant thunder for a few minutes before Nej broke the silence by both eating a cookie and speaking.

"So now what do you wanna do? Anything you wanna ask me?"

[member="Ayessa Kroan"]

 

[Ayessa Kroan]

Kiffu, Clan Kroan's Remnants, Undetermined Time
Interacting with [member="Nej Tane"] ~ hold on ~ "You make it right, every moment that we spend without time."
——————————————————————

He was good enough to pin her for that. She couldn't fault that, leaning into him with the arm around her, exuding a sense of affection and relaxation now, "Yeah, yeah. I'll give you that one, you did." The light feeling in her chest was relatively unmatched, something she hadn't felt in years. Years-years. Maybe the last time she felt this peace she'd been a child, or even a young teenager, before the war and before Knighthood stole every moment of joy she could have ever claimed to have.

"Ask you?" Hmm. There were a couple dozen things she could have asked of him, each one with various levels of importance and severity, but she settled for something rather light to begin with, "I just realized I don't know how old you are. How about that?"

There was probably a joke to be made there about her being a bit too old for him, but, still.

 

[Nej Tane]

Oh man, the questions started rolling in- could talk to her forever. Forever and forever.


"Carbon dating puts me at 25, plus or minus three years." Nej said bluntly. He had that question answered on his first bout to prison. That was for the dentistry thing. He ran a hand through his hair. A lot of things bothered Nej. Not knowing anything about who he was, where he was born- it all bothered him immensely. He was probably 25. At least, he hoped so. He didn't want to be 28. Unless he was an Epicanthix or something to that degree.

"I never knew, and will probably never know- anything about where I'm from." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "The war. Tell me what happened- I only know...nothing. I'll be honest, I got nothing."

[member="Ayessa Kroan"]

 

[Ayessa Kroan]

Kiffu, Clan Kroan's Remnants, Undetermined Time
Interacting with [member="Nej Tane"] ~ hold on ~ "Pain is something how we manage on the line, It's on us now to keep our route come hell, high water."
——————————————————————


25, huh? "I was 22 when the war came to an end, when I-- Left." Leaving made it sound confusing, strange, but it's what happened, "We'll find something for you. Anything. If this place exists, yours does too." It had meant to be comforting to him but brought her more serenity than anything. That all began to fade once he asked for details on a period that led to dread in her bones. The air left her in a sudden, shuddering rush and Ayessa's shoulders visibly drooped, "Mm. I don't know how history's treated it, but--"

"But it was brutal. And violent. I was half-way through my trials when the Order mobilized to Geonosis with an army out of thin air. I was made a commander and given men, I didn't know what I was doing."

"A lot of them didn't make it back, but that was supposed to be okay because they were clones," That seemed to be the worst part of her tale, face creeping closer and closer to rest against him, "So they were expendable life. I took on an artillery shot to make sure they lived and some thought it was a waste to have a Jedi act like that."

Another forlorn exhale, her gaze bitter and downcast, looking to her feet, "When I got my knighthood they made me a General, gave me some fleets and told me that I'd be deployed to the Outer Rim. Fought on... I don't even know how many fronts. I remember Ryloth like it was yesterday, and Umbara, but the rest is probably best forgotten." The Jedi's voice fell quiet then as she leaned against Nej for literal and emotional support, clearly, having gotten briefly lost in the memories of the conflict, "That first artillery, though, I'll never forget that pain. Still got the burn scars." They marred her midsection and back in messy patterns, a feature she didn't like to think about often.

 

[Nej Tane]

I'd later dream about that moment. Favorite dreams.


Lives thrown away. Meat to the grinder. Nej never had been a soldier, but he knew the effects. He'd been around the galaxy long enough to know how wars turned out. She wasn't a soldier. She wasn't a fighter. She was a victim. Like everyone else. He'd never understand that war. He'd never know what the meaning of it all would be.

"Grew up poor. Went hungry. Stole. Fought. Did what I had to do to survive- to earn enough to scrape by. Ended up owing a lot of money to a lot of bad people. Got stabbed. Beat up. Thrown in prison....shot a few people. A lot of people, now."

He stroked her hair, listening to the rain and watching the wall, and her sometimes.

"Come to terms with that I'll never find my parents, or where I came from. No way of knowing. Just...dropped me off on Tatooine. No note, no nothing- just me, by my lonesome and a basket a couple creds for their trouble- since then. Bounced around from orphanage to orphanage- and then, bam- kicked out. Had to join a gang- then another one. And another one to survive. Get by, really."

He propped up a leg.

"Only heard about it in passing."

[member="Ayessa Kroan"]

 

[Ayessa Kroan]

Kiffu, Clan Kroan's Remnants, Undetermined Time
Interacting with [member="Nej Tane"] ~ hold on ~ "You can count on it, I'm where you left me."
——————————————————————

Ayessa listened to him speak with an air of calm. Re-balancing herself, head against his chest, letting Nej say his piece. The rain provided suitable ambience, slowly but surely her arms found a place loosely around his neck, thumb gently brushing along the nape in a way meant to bring some comfort, the way he did to her before, "It's not fair, that you had to live like that. Grow up like that." All honest truths she believed, wholeheartedly. He deserved better than to have grown up living like that when Ayessa had been reared in a temple with tangible comforts despite the monk ways of her Order, a life laid out for her that was nigh impossible to refuse or change.

"...Thank you for taking me here." The Jedi muttered then, head lifting from his side to casually stare at him, gaze a mess of conflicted emotions, "I know I might have said that already. But thank you." Her arms loosened a little more, forearms balanced on his sternum.

Dangerously close, now, they were.

 

[Nej Tane]

I've wanted a lot of things in my life, kid- lemme tell you. I've wanted everything from the stars to a Star Destroyer. Stole most of what I wanted. But I never knew what I needed- and when she touched me like that- I knew what I needed in my life. I needed her.


No. It wasn't fair. It wasn't right, it wasn't fair. But the galaxy wasn't fair. "Maybe. But I think I turned out alright, all things considered." Ayessa had her path chosen for her, Nej took some comfort in that he had some direction or control of his life, despite the rough start he had. He watched the wall with her, listening to the ambient soundtrack that the planet provided.

Dangerously close, indeed.

"I mean- if we're gonna go somewhere- we might as well go together, you know? I didn't want you to do this on your own."

[member="Ayessa Kroan"]

 

[Ayessa Kroan]

Kiffu, Clan Kroan's Remnants, Undetermined Time
Interacting with [member="Nej Tane"] ~ hold on ~ "I can count on you to show me the way."
——————————————————————

A smile grew then, slow and almost sleepy. There was an expression of immense gratitude across her features too, fingers curling against his chest, "You could have been worse." She agreed almost dryly, a note of nervousness in her voice. The proximity was... New.

New was scary, most of the time.

Nej looked at the wall, she looked at Nej. Every second felt like an hour as her mind looped in circles to determine what to do next. What to say, how to feel, whether a risk was worth it. Maybe it was. Well, she wasn't getting any older. Swallowing the last of her uncertainty, Ayessa reached up, slid a hand under his chin and rather suddenly pulled his mouth to meet hers, no warning, no preamble, no warm-up. A bit more proper than the embrace on Zeltros, which had been a so-called survival tactic, but also a little more desperate.

 

[Nej Tane]

Aw man- that. That was it. That was the best thing that's ever happened to me.


Nej had begun to formulate a response. "I mean, I think saying that would make me-" Then, the ultimate interruption happened. He felt her move- felt her breathe, felt her weight. Felt her arms cross his chest, cross his neck- touch his face. Every nerve ending lit up at once. Dopamine flooded his brain. He knew all the science (he didn't.) behind it, but it felt more than that- felt like destiny itself was leading him here, with her.

But it ended, as much as he didn't want it to. It ended and there was nothing but blissful silence between them.

"Make me uh- uh. You know. With the. Stuff."

Then, he pulled her in. He pulled her in real close- and he kissed that Jedi back harder than, well, she kissed him. He wasn't good with analogies or metaphors or anything like that. He was just a sentimental idiot.

Her sentimental idiot.

[member="Ayessa Kroan"]

 

[Ayessa Kroan]

Kiffu, Clan Kroan's Remnants, Undetermined Time
Interacting with [member="Nej Tane"] ~ hold on ~ "We can keep it light, we're going somewhere."
——————————————————————

Coming up for air was hard, but necessary.

Well -- Not technically. She could go long periods without oxygen, but the Force wasn't quite behaving in the moment. Ayessa's focus was all over the place anyhow, but it predominantly fell there. With him. When she finally pulled her head back she had a near-wicked smile, clearly pleased with herself, before stating in a low voice, "I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about." A short series of laughs followed, fingers loosely against his scalp.

It was a little strange to be doing this, here, of all places. A place meant to be home, but wasn't, a village long lost to war that probably experienced untold suffering before the bitter end.

She made sure not to touch many objects. Experiencing that was something she didn't want to do.

 

[Nej Tane]

She was like- heat lightning, you know? You could feel it coming a mile away, but never expected it- and when it hit, it hit, hit hard.


Soft, the rains came. Distant, the thunder was. Nothing was bothering them, nothing could. They were safe, alone, and intertwined. Destiny had lead them together here. Volition had pushed him to where he was.

The Jedi and the Smuggler- the Jedi and the Scoundrel, the Spacer and the Jedi. Anything like that, he was okay with, but what he liked the most- was Ayessa and Nej. The two were, now, for better or worse, together.

"I was going somewhere with it, I swear."

[member="Ayessa Kroan"]

 

[Ayessa Kroan]

Kiffu, Clan Kroan's Remnants, Undetermined Time
Interacting with [member="Nej Tane"] ~ hold on ~ "I won't try to fight it, don't feel like it."
——————————————————————

"Were you?"

Her laugh was soft and quiet, breath warm on his skin due to the proximity; it was getting a little chilly in the tent despite the shelter. Still, she had a stellar space heater, a rough exhale leaving her chest after a moment of silence, "...Where do we go from here, huh?"

A simple question, a million answers. Literally, figuratively, who knew -- But judging by the way her eyes swept over the barren tent, she meant literally. Couldn't remain on Kiffu forever and mourn ghosts. Moving on-- The faster the better --was what needed to happen, now. Maybe Nej'd help with that. Ayessa found herself trusting him implicitly, well, she had to now, despite hidden doubts inside that chimed in about the numerous prices willing to be paid for a a Jedi's head.

This galaxy is something else.

 

[Nej Tane]

I knew the best, simplest answer.




"Figuratively I was thinking at least third base- literally-" His eyes met hers. Warm and inviting. Sentimental, blissfully ignorant of a lot. To be honest, a lot more than he should've. At least he could read.

"Anywhere you wanna go. Anywhere you want me to go. Jedi adventures, and all."

[member="Ayessa Kroan"]