Private Midnight in the Garden

[Dominic Praxon]

The comment about unfamiliar anatomies flew directly past Dominic as he wrestled with the revelation of her imminent replacement. His mind protested against it, but also at the ache in his chest that the notion caused. The feeling of imminent loss was entirely unwelcome, and shocking given that just moments ago he had struggled to reconcile the metallic version of Tatiana he had seen.

He was becoming attached.

Dominic looked away, partially to chastise himself. He was a Senator. He was Diplomatic lead of the Republic's first ever great endeavour outside its own formation. He had a chance to write his name into the history books, and for all the right reasons. And here he was feeling for her like he was still a lovestruck youth in finishing school.

The aversion of his eyes was for another reason though. So she didn't see how much the thought of her leaving already hurt. He didn't want her to know. That caused guilt to send a cold spike through his chest.

"You speak of your replacement with such ease," he said, though the hurry of her words had been noted.

He let go of her hand, and stood, rubbing the bridge of his nose. Cheeks flushing. Blood rushing to his brain and causing him a brief lightheadedness. It passed, the sting of guilt, and impending loss did not.

"The relationships you have built on this mission are complex," he said, offering a wave of hand and looking back towards her, but more past her. Eye contact now felt dangerous, like she would see his conflict.

"Surely, they would understand that they can only learn more as they develop," he said before scratching the back of his neck, "friendship is one thing...there are other sorts of relationships...and even friendship is multi faceted. Sometimes it takes...years to be tested like it should be."

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

Tatiana watched Dominic. The way he looked away. How he stood with the warmth of his hand fading. Blue eyes followed at his back. When he turned to face her, their eyes didn't meet and she wondered what thoughts occupied him in that moment.

It was true. Replacement was easy for her people. Human accepted mortality as something that was unavoidable, but her people embraced it as a means of continued societal evolution. Technically, they didn't "die" in the traditional sense either, but Tatiana knew Dominic would only take it as semantics. Her physical chassis would be gone so from his point of view she might as well be dead.

"Some elements are concerned in making an exception that the natural order of our society might be disturbed. That the criteria of determining who and for how long one might remain beyond our determined time would become ambiguous and lead to disharmony." Tatiana's reply was easy, but her attention never wavered from his face. Perhaps if they heard it from Dominic they might better understand. Her's was a rational argument, but there would always be a question of bias or -- not that anyone would say this openly -- corruption.

"What... sort of friendship, Dominic?" Other sorts? Multi-faceted? That sounded like something worth exploring. Perhaps he would help her explore it.

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

"Ah...what am I doing?" He said, to himself. Rubbing the back of his neck, Dominic tried to pull himself together. The way she approached every conversation with such god-damned earnestness. It was horridly disarming, and something that he never thought he would find attractive.

"You know...there are other ways that friendship can...become something more." He said, but quickly moved on. "And then there is business relationships. Political relationships." He was already making his way to sit beside her again, trying to brush off any allusion to something other than what they already had.

"All I am saying is that you cannot know the depth and complexity of human relationships...in...a year? A few months?" He said as the obvious question dawned on him, "how long...have you been away from your homeworld?"

He had settled uncomfortably on the bench beside her, like he was ready to jump up again should things change. Though his smile seemed genuine, his eye contact seemed to not linger on hers as much as it had. All of it made Dominic feel decidedly juvenile.

"Look. You are too important to...this mission...for you to be leaving any time soon. If you need someone to plead your case...I offer my services."

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

"I left home six months after my homeworld found itself placed in this galaxy. One month after First Contact with other sapient lifeforms. Fortunately, we appeared in a relatively unknown region of space that afforded us a degree of control over our initial introductions with other species." Tatiana looked away for a moment. When she looked back at Dominic there was a hint of uncertainty. "Our first encounter could have been... smoother. Which is part of the reason I sought to join this expedition. In case others like ourselves appeared and might respond unexpectedly." That and obviously mapping the galaxy.

Wide, blue eyes batted in the face of Dominic's assertion of her importance. "I... would like that very much, Dominic. You are also party to this discussion." Though very, very few other lifeforms were aware of it. "Your insight would not only be from a different perspective, but the most important one. I can only argue from deductive inference. You... feel it. It is a literal truth." Her hand slowly drifted over toward him as if he might launch himself away to escape its touch.

"Why would I be crucial to this mission?" Tatiana offered him a smile in the hope it would be reassuring.

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

Being called on his declaration was something he should have expected by now. It was the classic Tatiana move. Don't just accept the compliment, that was admittedly a cover up for something else he almost said, but question it. Drive home the persistent earnestness even more.

"Well. You have made a very good impression on this mission," Dominic said, whose smile was all politics and emotional obfuscation.

Her insistence that he could offer insight that she lacked, made him laugh. Again, it was a refreshingly sincere, transparent moment. "I have never been needed to speak based on my emotional intelligence before," he said, again rubbing his eyes to ward off the encroaching tiredness, "surely you feel emotions...have emotional understanding. Not everything about you is facts and logic...I can tell that much."

"You undersell yourself in many ways, Tatiana. Your emotional understanding...your value as a Wayfinder, a Jedi...a scientist...I am sure that there are more I could think of..." If I wasn't in danger of saying too much.

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

Curious. Dominic's expression seemed... what was the word? Forced? But why would he be trying to conceal something from her now? There was no one else here to see them. Ah, perhaps it was her connection back home! They were the very entities that needed to hear what Dominic had to say, however. Why else would he 'sanitize' his words and 'school' his expression?

Thankfully, he laughed soon enough, which was certainly not part of the facade he'd donned a second ago. Tatiana's own smile brightened in response.

"It is not a quality my people ordinarily possess. I've come to understand it better as I spend time with those like yourself. People that spend time conversing about many different topics. It has been a... long road, as some put it. In fact, there are those back home that suggest that is precisely why another should replace me. That they could be given these awareness, and being a newer generation grow faster along those lines." A soft, throat hum followed. "I see their logic, but I feel," she paused to smile over at Dominic, "that emotional maturity is something we should explore as slowly as the vastness of the Force or even interpersonal relations. Do you agree?"

"I'm certain I can still contribute to my personal mission and that of this expedition." That may have been obvious to a Human, but her people had different values and priorities. Enough similarities Tatiana wasn't worried a shooting war could breakout, but also enough differences that misunderstandings were still possible.

Tatiana leaned in a little closer. "Are you alright, Dominic? If you'd like, we can continue our discussion again later." It appeared exhaustion was catching up with the Senator. She had to be mindful of that, or they could literally talk all night. Or until he collapsed, and she didn't want that.

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

"You feel?" Dominic asked.

His eyes betrayed him for a fraction of a second. As he blinked, his gaze dropped instinctively to her lips, before another quick flutter sent him looking safely past her. Heat flushed hot against his cheeks.

"How very human of you," he murmured.

Gravity itself seemed to tug on him. As Tatiana leaned in, he felt his own body shift toward her, caught in her orbit. His mind raced to justify the sudden proximity, and the dangerous intent he read into it.

"Emotional maturity is not really possible without time...and exploration," he said, his eyes betraying him yet again.

Pursing his lips briefly, Dominic tried to force himself to pull away, but instinct kept him weighted toward her. What would the harm be in taking this further? His rational mind threw a hundred worst-case scenarios at his worn-down resolve, but the desperate drive to be closer won out. Most of the warnings sounded like paranoid conspiracies. The rest sounded like bridges that could be burned another day.

And then, she gave him an out.

He winced, noticeably, as rationale suddenly gained a stronger purchase in his mind. Yet, instead of backing off, he leaned in further. He pressed a gentle, lingering kiss against her cheek, holding it there for a quiet ache before finally pulling back.

"Thank you for not holding my being busy against me. And thank you for being my friend," he whispered against her skin.

He broke the contact, drawing back to a respectable distance. He patted her hand and offered her a half-smile, one far more suited for a scoundrel than a knight in shining armour.

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

Dominic did agree. The way he seemed more focused was heartening. It wasn't that long ago he seemed inclined to flee rather than engage. Given his feelings on droids it had been a concern. Now, Dominic was kind, warm, and meeting her gaze -- or near enough.

As he drew a little closer, Tatiana didn't pull away. The smile on her lips turned into mild surprise when Dominic turned his head slightly and placed a soft kiss on her cheek. Lidless, blue eyes stared straight ahead as the contact lingered. What... what was she supposed to do? For Domnic's part, Tatiana's skin felt pliable and slightly warm. Not too far off from Human unless his kiss was high or low enough to expect a cheek or jaw bone's resistance beneath his lips that wasn't there.

Her eyes fell to his hands before they bounced back up to his face.

Tatiana felt like it should be her thanking him for not holding her makeup against her. It was quite 'alien' to his kind. True, the same was true for her -- for her entire species -- but they'd been mentally prepared for it. As well as they could be. But her time with Dominic was different. More intimate. Less philosophical as she tended to be with others trying to unravel what it meant to be living in this galaxy.

"I'll always be there for you, Dominic." That was better than just saying he was welcome, in her opinion. Their friendship was not transactional.

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

The scoundrel's smirk lingered, but internally, the gears of his mind ground to a sudden, bewildered halt.

He waited for the shift. The micro-expressions he had spent a lifetime reading in the high courts of the Brentaal and Naboo. A flush of the cheeks, a widening of the eyes, a conscious pulling back, or perhaps a leaning in. Any of the universal markers of a woman realising a frontier had just been broached.

Instead, Tatiana simply stared straight ahead, completely unblinking, her clinical processing practically audible in the quiet space between them.

For a man who prided himself on his charm, the lack of reciprocation...the absolute, factual blankness of her response...was utterly jarring. No one had ever reacted to him like this. He had braced for impact, for a lecture, or for a sudden, passionate escalation. He had not braced for...nothing.

But as the initial shock faded, the tension left his shoulders, replaced by a quiet, genuine amusement. He let out a soft, huffed breath of a laugh, shaking his head. She truly was unlike anyone else in the galaxy. He couldn't apply human rules to her, and there was something intensely freeing about that.

Then, her quiet vow echoed in the cool air. "I'll always be there for you, Dominic."

The raw sincerity of it pierced straight through his lingering amusement, bringing the heavy reality of their situation crashing back down. His expression softened, turning wistful, but also pained.

"Don't make promises you can't keep," he said, his voice dropping to a murmur.

He looked down at his hand, still resting on hers, remembering her admission from moments ago. Her people viewed her very existence as a temporary assignment, a model to be upgraded. They didn't understand that the roots she was planting here couldn't just be transplanted into a newer generation.

"You told me yourself...your people are already looking to replace you," Dominic continued, his tone becoming more regulated. The Senator was stepping back into the light, but this time, it was for her.

His gaze locked onto her blue eyes with absolute focus.

"My offer stands, Tatiana. I can speak to the importance of long term exposure to human interactions." Why it was only human interactions was better left unexplained.

"Just name the place and the time. I can explain to them through your connection...or however that works? I don't have to physically stand before them, right?"

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

Tatiana gazed into his eyes before she looked off to the side as Dominic looked to his hand. Her attention returned in short order, however, as her companion sought to constrain himself. The insinuation hadn't been difficult to discern, but Dominic made sure she understood. And he wasn't wrong from a strictly literal sense.

"If you prefer, Avatars could be arranged for you to stand before them. Otherwise, I can pass your representation back to them. Whenever you are a ready." Her thumb gently caressed his hand atop her own. "After you've rested." Would it be romantic if he did it dead tired? Perhaps, but she did not think the emotional appeal some sought to leverage in such displays would be as effective in garnering a Consensus. There were elements that would both appreciate and repudiate such displays for what they were -- an effort at emotional manipulation. Foolhardy with her people, perhaps, but a skill nonetheless.

Part of her wanted to explain her earlier statement, but she wondered if Dominic was ready to understand the nature and scope of it. Humans often spoke of being there quite literally. Obviously that wasn't possible. Of course, it wasn't possible even between two Humans. With her people, however, it was possible, but in a distinctly inhuman manner; which was where appreciation might be hard to find given how alien the concept would be.

"What I would like is if you would be there for me as well, Dominic. As long as we have form. There's no need to travel between the stars alone."

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

A headache was starting to form behind his eyes. The first sign that he was nearing exhaustion. Given that his chrono read near to 1 am in the daily ship board cycle, he could understand why. But...

He didn't want to leave.

Every glance she gave, invited more thoughts and questions. Every statement she made, seemed laden with subtext that he was either too tired, or to dull to comprehend. It was finally dawning on him, in his slowly blurring mind, that Tatiana Sah might just be the single most fascinating woman he had ever met.

"I will do what you need...you will have to explain the process...obviously." He offered a sleepy, lop-sided smile.

"And, I would ask that you give me some parameters as to your expectations." There was the media coached side of him on display.

Finally, the last clear indication where he was at, Dominic yawned. His hands came to his mouth, apologetically. Words muttered to indicate he did not intend such a display.

"This has been really nice, Tatiana. Let me know when you want me for this meeting." His smile took on a cheek edge. "Or if you just want to do this again."

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

Tatiana smiled before she moved to rise to her feet first. She kept her hand with Dominic even as she rose. A gentle lift of the hand offered to help support his own rise in turn. "Let me escort you back to your room. You're tired, and this is a large ship." There might not be danger aboard ship, but Dominic was a politician. Best not to have him ambling about looking drunk, or passed out somewhere.

"And I would like to do this again. This is a lovely place in the garden." Her blue eyes swept over the surrounding area before they returned to Dominic. If he'd like, of course. Perhaps he wanted somewhere to himself. Not that Tatiana entirely understood that concept or need; it was not something that came naturally to her people.

Later, of course. Once Dominic was rested and would clearly recall their time together. Much like his offer to support her thesis regarding the need for long-term engagement with those of this galaxy. All things she was looking forward to. Her time with Dominic had been delightful. So much so, Tatiana intended to share a means of expediting some more of his reporting. She would hasten such delivery, but he might feel she was a threat to his livelihood even though Tatiana could tell he genuinely felt burdened by the toil.

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

Dominic accepted her hand as he rose, the motion delayed only a fraction of a second, as though his body had briefly debated the etiquette before yielding. He did not comment on the reversal of roles it implied, though it was noted with some degree of amusement. "Thank you," he said quietly, more for the assistance than anything else, steadying himself once upright.

"I believe this is mine," he noted, while reaching out to pull his coat from her. "Though...you are welcome to keep it if you are cold."

When she moved to walk, he did not hesitate in following. After a brief pause, he adjusted his pace to match hers and, after a moment of consideration, offered his arm in a manner that was more formal than intimate, but not entirely devoid of intention.

"As always, I appreciate your company," he said, "though the corridors are probably a little narrow for you to fly me home."

A tired smirk was offered along with the dozing attempt at wit.

"And…yes," he added, quieter, "I would not object to this being the place we return to."

A walk back to a room usually implied something in Dominic's past. But this felt decidedly different. Such was the earnestness of Tatiana's being, he sincerely wondered if she just meant to protect him. It was far removed than the implications of other such rendezvous'. And somehow, Dominic actually found that decidedly refreshing.

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

Tatiana stood near as he rose in case Dominic lost his balance. On his feet, her brows lifted as he called attention to his jacket. She had forgotten about it. Her chin dropped in order to look at the jacket on her shoulder. "Of course. Thank you for offering it to me earlier, Dominic." In case he was uncertain how best to retrieve it, she lifted her free hand to help slip it from one shoulder and then the other so he could retrieve the article of clothing. "It was... warm." Not that she had needed it, but Tatiana knew enough about social niceties not to be 'a droid about it.'

She'd start to lead the way out of the garden, expertly aware of its layout from both schematics and her earlier aerial mapping. A smile was directed down and then back up at Dominic when he offered his arm. A welcome invitation she accepted with minimal delay. Hopefully it wasn't rude of her to stand so close with their arms interlocked; it'd seemed awkward if she had tried to maintain her distance.

The comment about the corridors being too narrow to navigate by flight went by unchallenged. Best not to shock or excite Dominic too much or he'd have trouble getting actual rest back in his bed, she thought.

"That's wonderful, Dominic. Please let me know if you require any assistance so you can visit more frequently. And do not concern yourself with my duties, I can assure you the course ahead will be charted on schedule." There were benefit to operating at a faster temporal pace than her surroundings. Drawbacks as well, but benefits too. A facet touched upon earlier that Dominic might not yet fully recognize -- or perhaps he had, but with so many topics to discuss hadn't the opportunity to vocalize.

Her pace was steady and without haste. There was no need to get Dominic's heart rate up getting back to his quarters. It also provided them more time together! Which was curiously paradoxical seeing as how she was trying not to rouse him from his near-sleep state so he'd sleep more readily; and if she wasn't engaging then why did they need more time together? And how could she ask questions like that without coming off as hopelessly obtuse? She'd give it more consideration before asking.

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

Despite the increasing fog in his head, the walk back through the hallways of the Outbound Flight were significantly improved by Tatiana's company.

When she complemented the warmth of the jacket, he could not prevent the laugh that resulted. "Well...I apologise for misreading the situation," he said, "I wished to preserve a modesty that was apparently not in jeopardy."

He cursed his wandering, exhausted mind as it replayed flashes of her metallic form. Then he cursed whoever had designed it with such proportions in the first place. It was entirely unfair.

"Careful. If you continue making such offers," Dominic said, free hand resting on her arm as they walked along, "I may start relying on you."

It did occur to him that she would likely be far more efficient at a lot of the tasks he had on his plate. There were security concerns, obviously. And even if he scrubbed certain files of information she wasn't permitted to have, there were still patterns in the data that she would be far more adept at picking up on. Or he could just get her a higher security clearance.

Then it dawned on him. The real reason she offered.

"I enjoy spending time with you, too," he said, casting a side-eyed glance and a half-grin.

Tatiana Sah​

 

[Tatiana Sah]

Tatiana smiled over at Dominic as he bashfully basked in her compliment. There was that word again, 'modesty.' Had it been in jeopardy? The fact her natural state didn't have what Humans would define as clothing still didn't register on her thought processes. Unlike most, her species didn't have distinctively reproductive anatomy that required cover for the sake of modesty. Though that was a topic Dominic no doubt had questions about; which he would have to ask before Tatiana would just dump exposition on him about the matter.

Her brows rose as Dominic started his words of caution, but they soon settled. Tatiana desperately wanted to say that was exactly what she wanted, but Dominic would probably take that as being too -- what was the word? -- clingy? Perhaps, wary? Emotional states or beliefs she didn't want to encourage.

Fortunately, he arrived at a more wholesome understanding on his own. Quite fast too for a Humanoid. Well, there were many reasons Tatiana liked Dominic, and his mental adaptability was one of them. Though it probably wasn't so adaptable he'd accept her offering to watch over him this very night. Though it was entirely acceptable that non-partners could reside at someone's place, it would be a sudden topic and she wasn't exactly homeless on the ship... Another topic they could discuss when he wasn't half-asleep already.

"Would you like for me to visit in the morning? We could get breakfast together." A socially acceptable alternative enabling them to talk and share one another's company! She felt quite accomplished thinking of it.

Dominic Praxon

 

[Dominic Praxon]

The walk through Outbound Flight's corridors should have been unremarkable, but Dominic was painfully aware of Tatiana. His usual mental barriers felt delayed by exhaustion and undermined by her quiet sincerity. She did not posture or play the social games he had spent his life surviving. Somehow, that made her feel infinitely more dangerous.

A breakfast invitation should not have carried weight. If a Senator had asked, it would be politics. If others had, it would be courtship or toxic. With Tatiana, he genuinely did not know, yet that uncertainty made him want to say yes.

When they reached the door to his quarters, Dominic had assembled a diplomatic answer to restore distance. His hand touched the door panel. Then he really looked at her. His exhaustion was confronted by her earnestness. All at once, his carefully reconstructed walls failed.

A tired smile tugged at his mouth. "It's a date."

Tatiana Sah​