Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Mason Family Hospital (MFH)

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Matreya

Well-Known Member
Corporation Name: Mason Family Hospital
Headquarters: Valhalla
Locations: Courscant, Korriban, Styx, Dantooine, Tatooine
Operations:
-Health care
-Physical & mental studies
-Bacterial/Virus/Disease control
Rationale:
Tier: 3

Description:
Named after the sister he spent most of his life believing he didn't have, @[member="Feena Mason"], whom changed things greatly for Zaiden. Initially the corp was made as a way to protect Zaiden's staff and assets, as injury per week numbers had begun to skyrocket with each new massive order made of James Armor Co. But since it has oppened to anyone whom need assistance, ranging from the harshest of surguries to bumps and headaches. Feeling it best to place his men at the heart of the situation, Zaiden initiated the creation of a hospital near every one of his warehouses.
 
Without some sort of development thread and a vastly expanded description of at least several paragraphs, I can't approve this at Tier 3. With the description as is, I wouldn't even approve it at Tier 2.

As someone who has openly admitted to gunning for Master rank, I'm more than a bit disappointed by the lack of effort displayed here.

Your options are either to edit the description and expand it to several paragraphs while dropping it to Tier 2, or expanding the description in such a well written manner that I am impressed enough to grant you Tier 3.
 

Matreya

Well-Known Member
I'm gonna do the latter. Sorry, these were done while I was half asleep. I swear I thought I put more work into it. I'll add you when I get it editted.
 
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