Private Knowledge Passed Down

[Reina Daival]

Location: Tython
Tags: Valery Noble


Reina stood outside the door to Valery's office, the redhead frozen in the spot. She needed to talk to someone about how she was. What she needed. But...She couldn't talk to Everest. No. She was part of the problem unfortunately. It hurt Reina so much to feel this way but she couldn't help it. There wasn't anyone else Reina could talk to about her failures. Yet she couldn't bring herself to knock on the door fully. Not yet. She had to calm herself down. Breathe. Things were going to be fine. She didn't have to worry as much as she was. Valery hadn't given a single reason for Reina not to be able to trust her. There was just that irrational fear that she'd be pushed away. She had no reason to believe it, but the cracks were finally starting to form.

There was a growing desire inside of Reina. One that she didn't want. A desire for revenge. To prove herself. Reina knew it would get herself killed if she didn't learn how to deal with it. If she didn't learn how to protect herself and get more experience. To learn. She had to talk to someone about this. Reina couldn't keep it in, but at the same time, she couldn't tell Everest. Not after how she reacted in the Medbay. When Reina told her what had happened between her and Serina. Reina was worried about the anger that Everest had. It wasn't anger that she wanted her best friend to have...so instead, she decided it would be best to discuss it with Valery as Reina raised her hand gave the door a gentle knock finally. It was time to try and face it as much as she could.
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[Valery Noble]

The knock was soft and hesitant, almost too quiet to notice.

But Valery noticed.

She looked up from the datapad she'd been reviewing, the faint hum of the screen still lingering in her ears as she set it aside. There was something about the knock that wasn't just polite courtesy. It carried a weight, like whoever stood on the other side was wrestling with more than just nerves.

Valery rose from her chair, smoothing a hand over her tunic as she approached the door. When it slid open with a gentle hiss, she was already looking down slightly, and found Reina standing there, tension written in her shoulders, worry in her eyes.

"Reina," Valery said, her voice soft but grounded. Not surprised. Not alarmed. Just present. "Come in." She stepped aside and gestured for her to enter, the office behind her lit with the warm, muted glow of late afternoon. It smelled faintly of herbal tea and old books, a comforting contrast to the turbulence Valery could feel just beneath Reina's surface.

Once the door closed behind them, Valery returned to her desk but didn't sit. Instead, she leaned gently against the edge, arms crossed in a relaxed way. Open, not closed off. Her expression was calm, steady, and full of the quiet patience Reina likely hadn't realized how much she needed.

"You don't have to explain anything right away," Valery said after a moment, her tone light, but sincere. "Take a breath. You're safe here."

A small smile tugged at the corner of her lips.

"Whenever you're ready, I'm here to listen."

Reina Daival ​

 

[Reina Daival]

Location: Tython
Tags: Valery Noble


This wasn't the first time Reina had a conversation like this with Valery. Showing up at her door, knocking away. She made her way into Valery's office carefully, giving the grandmaster as Reina sat herself down. She was grateful for the patience. Reina still needed to figure out how to put her thoughts into words as she linked her hands together, staring down at the floor.

"I want...to get stronger...but not for a good reason."

Revenge. Revenge wasn't something that someone should want to follow. Reina knew that. But it was something she wished for. To be able to take Serina down a peg. To teach her a lesson that no-one else could. But Reina knew she wasn't strong enough to do. And she...knew she shouldn't be the one to do it herself.

"I want...to get revenge on someone. Her name is Serina Calis...She...She's been...manipulating me for a while. Acting as if she knows me better than I do...and I feel like she does...I had wanted to save her...but in the last fight I had with her...She...told me the truth for once. She...never cared about me. She doesn't care who I am...She wants to break me down and remake me...into how she thinks I should be...And I want to destroy her."

There was plenty of anger that Reina was trying to hold back, as she gripped her hands tighter. Her eyes still not lifting up from the floor. But it wasn't her anger that scared her the most. No.

"...But...I'm scared. Of wanting revenge. Of...how my anger can influence others...Everest came to visit me in the Medbay last time...and the anger she had when I told her what happened...It scared me...and I'm scared...of how self destructive I am. I cut off my own prosthesis when Serina went to rip it off...and I destroyed my eardrums...because she just wouldn't shut up..."

At least by now, the eardrums had healed. The physical injuries had healed. But the scars still were there. Physically and emotionally as Reina rubbed her arm against her face, trying not to focus on the various small scars that marked her face. More scars because of her aggression.
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[Valery Noble]

Valery didn't speak right away. She let the silence stretch, not awkwardly, but carefully. Her eyes never left Reina, though she didn't push for eye contact. She didn't need to. The weight of the words spoken was already enough. Every syllable of it, every pause, had meaning.

And pain.

After a moment, Valery pushed off the desk and stepped across the room to sit in the chair beside Reina rather than across from her. Closer. Not as a Master towering over a student, but as someone who had seen these kinds of wounds before. Who still carried some of her own.

"I'm really glad you came to me with this," she said gently, her voice low and even.

She folded her hands in her lap.

"What you're feeling… it isn't something to be ashamed of. Wanting revenge, being angry, even wanting to hurt someone who hurt you. Those are human things, Reina. Real things. You've been through something painful and deeply personal. Of course part of you wants to fight back in the only way that makes sense."

Her gaze softened, steady.

"But that doesn't mean you have to let that part be the one that leads you."

Valery let a breath go quietly.

"When I was younger, I lost people. People I loved. And I wanted revenge too. I wanted to make the ones responsible feel what I felt. I thought it was justice at the time." She looked down, then back to Reina.

"But it wasn't. It was anger in disguise. And if I hadn't had someone who pulled me back, who reminded me of who I really was… I don't know where I would've ended up."

A pause.

"You're scared of your anger influencing others. That's good. It means you're still thinking about how your choices affect the people around you. That tells me you haven't lost yourself."

She offered the faintest smile.

"And Everest was angry because she cares. People who love us get angry when we're hurt. That doesn't make your pain dangerous — it means it matters."

Valery reached out, offering her hand.

"I'll help you get stronger. But not to destroy someone. Not to feed that pain. I'll help you grow so you can stand up again. So you can build something from all this hurt. Something that belongs to you. Not to your fear."

Reina Daival ​

 

[Reina Daival]

Location: Tython
Tags: Valery Noble

For now, Reina stayed silent. Picking away at her thumb to keep herself occupied as she listened to Valery's words. It was at least...somewhat relieving to hear that Valery had been through a somewhat similar experience to Reina. Of course, it was somewhat different. Reina knew that if it had been someone she had loved who had gotten hurt in the way she had...There would have been no stopping her from seeking that revenge. That righteous justice that she'd have believed in. It was only because it was her own pain that Reina believed it was wrong for her to want revenge. She wasn't valuable enough to seek vengeance in her eyes.

"I just...I don't want...to see Everest go through that anger...It reminded me of how I used to be before I joined the Jedi...I was so...angry. Spiteful. Uncaring...I know Everest won't reach that point...but I'm afraid of her wanting to hurt Serina. I...care too much about her."

Reina saw Everest as one of the constant lights in her life. So to see that Light turn somewhat darker wasn't what Reina wanted whatsoever. It meant she had to learn how to protect herself. Which meant at the offer from Valery to help teach Reina how to get stronger, Reina was quite eager to agree to it, reaching out to take Valery's hand.

"...I need to get stronger. Not for myself. But to protect others from the pain...from seeing me hurt. I can deal with myself...being hurt. I can't...deal with other people being hurt. Not anymore."

It was funny in a way. Reina never used to care about others. Her focus had always be on herself, to be a stronger person so that she'd be better than others. Yet she found herself preferring to work with others at this point. Sure, there were still...some people she didn't care about. But hey. Coruscant hadn't been built in a day.
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