Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Private It's Time To Paint

Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

Honestly, it'd been a while since she just painted. Usually she couldn't bring herself to. Too tired, too busy, too many more excuses. But now, after Voss, now with a clear mind, she sat out in the gardens of the Temple, paintbrush in hand. Canvas propped up on a planter in front of her. Colors, all mostly random, sprawled out over the fabric. And herself. it wasn't Iris painting if she didn't some how end up with paint on herself. Her hands, her face, her arms and legs. Even her hair, stained by various shades as she kept a calm smile on her face and just.. Let the brush go where it would.

Today was just a peaceful day.

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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Bathed in the afternoon sun, the Jedi felt the warmth as it danced across his flesh. The muted sounds of Coruscant had become lost, both cast and swept aside as dusk neared with each moment. He felt the stone beneath him and little else, other than the faint breeze that entered in across from one of the various balconies. Rakaan heard all that amounted to white noise from behind his closed eyelids, the gentle stream and faint albeit distant chatter. A paintbrush, back and forth, up and down in those effortless strokes that marked the canvas with an unknown intention.

Though as Rakaan found himself to be clearer in mind and soul, the once vile and prophetic dreams and visions became shorter and infrequent, the act of simple meditation eluded him. He could sit there hours in focus, and yet find none. The Jedi sat there and listened to the world around him, unable to become lost in his own as a result.

The sounds of the paintbrush spilled forwards. Time and again, the strokes continued. Until one eye refused to stay close and in what seemed to be a held onto wink, Rakaan searched for the source of it. It was a mess, that the Jedi found, of both the canvas and of the painter. But a familiar sight, oddly. Someone that trailed Master Noble so often, even well before now, with the Jedi Master's seemingly horde of students.

"Are you Iris?" His voice carved into the quiet like a lightsaber in flesh. Valery mentioned certain Padawans of hers on more than one occasion, along with a few notable details. Of whatever it was she said, Rakaan had been confident he was correct. He wondered, at times, if the Jedi had chosen to forget him. Too ashamed of what he had once become. Even if only for a few months, they were undoubtedly dark times. Before then, a notable prodigy and now concerned as to whether that had become lost to shadows and doubt. "Master Noble mentioned she had a painter, and this isn't a common sight." He said as much warmly.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

It was a couple seconds before Iris even reacted to her name. Painting was an all consuming process for the Padawan. She blinked, lifted her gaze from the canvas to peer towards Rakaan. "I'm Iris, yeah. You know Master Noble?" Well, okay, that was a silly question. The Sword of the Jedi was probably known by everyone here in the Alliance, let alone the Jedi Temple. But knowing who she was by a title and knowing her enough that she'd talk about her Padawans were two different things, right?

She scooted around, not bothering to stand up.

"Who are you? You new to the temple?" Of all the people for Rakaan to meet, Iris was probably the worst for his fear of being forgotten. Iris barely remembered the past year, let alone people she'd never interacted with.

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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It had been a few short months. Into the service of the Empire at the behest of the Jedi Council, an inside man as it were. He was desperate to prove those doubters of his own abilities as a fresh-faced Jedi Knight. His master voiced concern, of the mind his former pupil was not up to such an arduous task. The Council had made their decision, regardless, and in the chaos of it all Korvan was proven correct. Rakaan adopted certain ideals and and refused to be pulled from the mission, only to do so with the further insistence of Iris' own master.

A Council member could hardly be refused so easily.

Into the moment, however. "I'm Rakaan," he offered in the rather simple attire of their people, devoid of the paint spots that marked Iris' own. "Master Noble used to teach me from time to time back when I was a Padawan. But no, I'm not new."

His eyes travelled towards her canvas and a curious look crossed his features. "What's that you're painting?" Rakaan asked with a nod towards it.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

Oh? Master Noble certainly had a number of Padawan's she didn't even realize. It was question Iris would have to ask her at some point. Eventually. Right now though, she turned her gaze back to her painting. It was, as ever, just a swirl of colors. Reds, blues, yellows, and everything in between just mixed and streaked without any focus or care. It was more methodical than that for Iris, who was copying the world of color around her as best she could.

"The world I see. Or, how I see the world, I guess." She paused as she turned her gaze back to Rakaan. Not him, of course. His colors, how his emotions affected the world around them. Then nodded once. She turned from him, opening the pack beside her as she gathered up some supplies from it. Another canvas, some more brushes. Paint tubes. Then turned back to him with a smile.

"Here. Paint. It'll be easier than trying to make yourself meditate."

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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The Jedi closed the distance between them with a touch of hesitance, a moment of pause amid the thinly veiled confusion and wonder left from the answer that Iris afforded him. Colours, that mention reminded Rakaan of those nightmares that plagued his slumber, believed to be visions more so than the former though; red and black, a storm of swirls and circles, harsh lines and shifts abound. It troubled him, even if it eased with time - a hint of a soured and dull mood left in the colours for Iris to see. Even if for a moment.

"You see the world like this?" He asked with a lofted brow as he slinked into the seat beside her, hands left to reach for the brush with an uncertainty to each almost careful movement. "I'm not sure what you mean?"
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

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"Sort of. There's more colors that I see than what I can paint with. The Force, emotions, life. Everything has it's own color." Iris was getting better at explaining this now, at least. Iris passed him the brush, nodding once to the canvas. "Don't think. Just start with your favorite color and just.. Paint. Feel, don't think." And with that she just turned back to her own painting, adding yet another color to the swirling vortex she'd been painting. Various shades all coming to a point. A sphere in the center, all blended colors. The chaos coming to a point where it'd be whole.

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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He tried to understand.

It was an odd idea. Yet such was the case with all that was new, Rakaan found, and the means of traditional meditation seemed to have such a useless effect on the Jedi and his state of mind; tumultuous, an apt word for what swirled around inside amid the return to the Jedi Order from that mission in the heart of Imperial space - ideas, politics, methods, all of which became second-nature to the young man that had seen it all on Bastion. The Imperials had become their enemies, their morals were a desolate wasteland left barren and void of life and reason, and yet still Rakaan had found merit in some methods.

Some. But even those few could not be uttered in return to the Jedi, let alone the Council in which Rakaan reported to.

"Hmph," the man huffed with brush in hand, a deep exhale followed as his eyes fell shut. The scattered dollops of paint lay out in front of him, a vacant canvas sat opposite. He let the Force decide, instead. As best as one could. "Is this how you meditate?"

His brush collected reds, greys, blacks. Splattered out across the canvas, in lines and in swirls, wherever his hand felt the need to go next. It was a blend, an overlapping mess of unidscernable meaning. Perhaps that was how he saw the world, at times.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

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"I suppose so, yeah. It's where I find myself the most at peace." All her life, at that. Same couldn't be said for him, though. Iris's gaze flicked to his canvas here and there. Not to judge, but just to.. Well. Worry was what she had. The colors on the canvas just matched the colors around him.

"Why do you feel like you're unwelcome?"

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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The Jedi could cloud his emotions, conceal them in the Force. It was not uncommon for Rakaan to be somewhat of a broadcasted beacon, especially once cast into the thick of a situation with much needed focus sent elsewhere instead - since the return to the Jedi Order from the heart of Imperial space, forced to abandon the mission assigned to him. He could recognise certain faults, certain errors that arose from his time in the Empire.

Swayed, somewhat. Just a touch with challenged beliefs. Perhaps some worth implementing.

But for all that was worth, Rakaan could not hide these colours. He was unsure what it meant, how to combat them, and thus floundered and flailed helplessly in them instead.

"Sorry, what?" He questioned with an arched brow, forcefully turned across to Iris.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"Ah, sorry. That might not actually be what's on your mind." Iris laughed nervously, turning her gaze back to her canvas. Now that she was more aware of it all, just blurting out what she interpreted the colors as was pretty rude, right? Still.. The healer in her just saw a problem that she wanted to fix. Amani Serys Amani Serys would be proud of that at least, right? "But that's what seems to be. It's like.. You're uncomfortable. Or at least afraid you will be?"

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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He returned his attention back to the canvas.

The Jedi stiffened, as if it was forceful in a manner. He tried, maybe too hard. Blue eyes settled onto the crimson and starless skies of swirlds depicted on the end of the brush, lathered over the material ahead of him. It almost forced a frown to crease across his features, reminded of the dreams and visions that leapt from his slumber and onto the canvas itself.

"Careful, Padawan." He said sternly, an undeterred stare left to face forwards. There was a touch of bitterness to the tone as the young Jedi Knight not far from his own days as a learner made use of his new standing within the Order. But with it, came regret. Regret for the attitude. His features softened as they turned across to Iris.

"I appreciate your attempts," he remarked with sincerity, "It's a period of readjustment, that's all. I assure you, you're wrong about the rest."

He lied, and it came so easily.
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

Iris flinched. Just a little. It was to be expected, for her prying into business that wasn't hers in the slightest. Though being referred to as Padawan was what she didn't expect. There was no denying that's what she was, but being referred to it as discipline and warning wasn't something she'd actually experienced before. Huh. Well. She offered a sheepish smile as she turned back to her own art. Content with leaving him be.

It wasn't her busine- Oh he lied.

The colors alone showed his deception. How used to it was he? The Padawan frowned. Turned her gaze back to him. "I might just be a Padawan, but.. Sometimes it helps to talk to someone. I might not have the experience, but I am good at listening. And knowing when people lie."

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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Colours.

Some finer, further vision into the Force. It was beyond the Jedi, even if such realisation ensured some sour taste in his mouth.

His brow lofted with the downward tilt of his head, an almost expectant expression plastered itself across his youthful features. Left in that transitional period between boy and man, with a scar by his eye to remain as much as a reminder as a marker for experience. An Imperial cut into the area beside his eye after the blue blade of the Jedi Knight thrust into her abdomen from behind; a merciless act, one that did not befit that of a Jedi and even still Rakaan had felt no shame in it.

She was a monster. Plain and simple.

He breathed, deeply. "It's not something I can freely talk about to a Padawan," there was a forced smile that followed before he returned to the canvas. His voice twisted into a low mutter, almost beneath his breath, "I'm not sure if I can talk about it to anyone."
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"Mm. .. It's hard, not wanting to burden others. At least, that's why I said nothing for a while."

Now she was being presumptuous, well. Somewhat. In truth she was just taking her own advice. If he didn't want to talk about himself or what happened to keep him so dim, she'd at least fill the silence. And really, she did want to tell someone. Someone who didn't know her or see her in some specific tailored way. "On Tython a Dark Lord used.. I think a spell. It let him enter my dreams. Control my body while I slept. He couldn't do anything really, just make me sleep walk. Out to the roof, every night. All while he showed me the most terrible things he could think up in my dreams to tempt me into taking the step off the ledge. I ran to Denon to fight thugs and drug dealers to try and handle it on my own. Until it became just too much and I felt like I wanted to take the step. Wanted it to end."

She frowned. That part she hadn't told even Valery. Maybe she was oversharing, but she couldn't bring herself to just stop now. "I told my master and together we figured it out. Removed the curse, removed him from my head. .. It's not good not to talk. Knight, Master, everyone needs someone to talk to. Don't give up on finding someone you can."

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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In the space between himself and the canvas, the hand that held the brush fell static.

It sat there, still, as if made of stone and carved into a statue while Iris spoke her truth. It was a tale unlike another, Rakaan decided, as the details created a vivid scene that formed inside his own mind. His own experiences as a Padawan involved a Dark Lord, a Sith, and countless of them and yet still Rakaan could only ever think of Iris as a child. Perhaps that's what he was at the time, unable to acknowledge the truth for what it was. His features softened at the idea, his mouth twisted into a frown.

"I..." He started only to see it all turn to ash, "Your own master has helped me a great deal. I see you get that from her."
 
Living In Color
Codex Judge

Iris_Sig.png

"Master Noble helps a lot of people. Sometimes even she needs help, too, though." There was no shame in it, right? Iris added one last paint stroke to her canvas before dipping the brush in the cup of nearby water to clean it. Then tucked it away. She left the canvas where it was, both to dry and to let whatever happened to it happened, as usual. With a little paint still on her hands she smiled.

"I'm going to go eat something. You're welcome to come along, or stay. Your choice."

Rakaan Horne Rakaan Horne
 


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CORUSCANT - Iris Arani Iris Arani

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He breathed, deeply. His features softened into his own smile, faint and brief as it was. He set the brush down beside him, not too sure as what to do with it. Hardly an artist himself, after all. Unless the strokes of a brush were turned to that of a saber, of which Rakaan was famously skilled with to those that knew the young Jedi recently returned.

"I think I'll stay." He answered with warmth, "Thank you, though."

For the insight and the offer.
 

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