Irkallin Be The Death Of Me

[Slade Zambrano]

"https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&persist_app=1&v=skxi4NTqFlw"]https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&persist_app=1&v=skxi4NTqFlw

Waking with his head laying back against a cheap sofa, Slade looked around at his life in the now. Besides him there was a man who he was pretty sure was dead, the man wore a flowery button up polo shirt that was opened up to reveal his bear chest. Upon further visual inspection he was certainly dead, his skin puffy and blue and tied to his arm was a rubber hose with a needle stuck in his vein. His mouth hung open as his body lay back against the sofa and thankfully he was wearing sun glasses, Slade didn't want to see those cold lifeless eyes. He wanted to scream, he wanted to get up and yell that there was a dead man next to him. But he couldn't, he just couldn't. He felt numb everywhere from the poisons still coursing through his veins, and it made him feel nothing for the man who could of been his friend the night before. Turning his gaze forward he saw a group of strung out nude Twi'leks of both genders laying on the floor, some breathing steadily others going through terrifying spasms and night sweats.

But that's when everything started to come to slade, where he was. Some crappy motel room on Antecedent, he was probably on another drug bender and ended up here after a week of partying. Looking around some more the dilapidated room looked like it was about to fall apart, it stank fiercely of various bodily fluids and substances, all of which he didn't care to name. But the worst part of it all, he was starting to feel again and he wanted it gone. He didn't want to feel that pain of crushing loneliness again and he didn't want to have to spend his pathetic excuse of a life sober. So he looked to the dead man next to him and saw the pack of preloaded goodies of Irkallin curtesy of [member="Roger Kranos"] that he was protecting while still in the land of the living. So slade took them back, and it was time to make the pain go away.

With the drugs running through veins he stood up and stumbled out the door of the crummy antecedent apartment. After a few moments Slade made it out to the streets of the under city and Into the darkness. He wore a dress shirt and slacks he had lost his jacket and tie somewhere along the bender he was still going strong on. But one thing came to Slade as he was walking through the streets with blood running down his nose and mouth. Hatred of his father, hatred of who he was. So slade stood there in the streets of the under city and looked forward at nothing as these thoughts came to him.

And the one thing he was going to give up more information, about the man who fathered him. The monster who spawned him into this miserable existence. So slade stumbled into a phone booth and dialed a number to a [member="Keira Ticon"] and since it was around three o'clock in the morning he got a messaging service. Now slade was used to these drugs by now, he could act sober and sustain himself with the force for a bit. So channeling his power he cleared his mind for a moment and left his message.

"Velvet Undercity Hotel, one hour, come alone." hanging up the phone slade let go and had the rush hit him again as he made his way into the crummy hotel to check into a room.

 

[Keira Priest]

Reaching up with one hand to rub the remnants of sleep from her eyes with the heel of her hand, Keira yawned quietly as she played the message over, pondering the words being spoken through a sleep-induced haze. With a sigh she pushed herself to her feet, forgoing the ladder that led up to her bed and simply jumping off the edge, forcing herself to awaken as she landed on the balls of her feet. Rummaging through her drawers for something to wear she glanced to the chrono hanging on the wall. 3:30 in the morning. That gave her a half hour to get dressed and sort herself into some presentable state before traveling to the hotel that had been designated for her second meeting with [member="Slade Zambrano"]. Pulling on an outfit she managed to pull a brush through her hair a few times before finally tugging on a dark beanie over it.

Still in a half-asleep state she stepped out of her room on the upper floor of the Dragon Palace Casino, locking the door behind her with a quiet beep in affirmation that the lock had tumbled into place. The upstairs of the establishment was deathly quiet, but as she made her way to the main floor there was still the dull noise of quiet conversation over drinks and the ever-present music of the various gambling machines scattered about the room. Merely nodding to the security present at all entrances and exits she left the brightly lit neon behind, replacing it with the dimly lit streets of the Antecedent undercity in no time at all. It was a place she hardly ever ventured to, never having a reason to bother with those that called it home. But this was a different matter, one just a bit more personal.

By the time she arrived at the hotel she was nearly completely awake despite the early hour, and as she stepped into the building sleep was a forgotten thing. Completing a cursory scan of what passed for the main lobby, she all but ignored the presence of whomever was seated at the front desk, navigating to the rooms of her own accord. It didn't take long to locate the man via the Force, after sifting through the various other drug-addled auras that permeated the surrounding area. Yawning one final time she stopped outside of the room she estimated him to be within, one hand brushing over the weapon at her waist. Not bothering to knock or so much as announce her presence, she stepped inside, letting the door close behind her.

Taking in his bloodied appearance for a moment she could tell he was still riding out some kind of high, unsurprising given what she'd previously sensed. Instead of offering a smile or even a 'hello' she sat down next to him, meeting his gaze easily. "You alright?" Well, that was a new one for her. Normally she couldn't care less about someone she'd only met once previously, but this was different. On some level she could connect with him, though she wasn't certain just what it was just yet. But the words had already been spoken, and that was that.

 

[Slade Zambrano]

[member="Keira Ticon"]

As Keira came into the room Slade didn't bother to clean himself up or look presentable, it was better this way. She could see what was under the glamor, the bad boy attitude, the smooth and suave persona he put forth. Beneath all that was the naked truth of some fucked up boy who never had someone who teach him how to be man. Sure he was a man anatomically speaking, but the idea of taking responsibility and truly growing up was lost to him just like it was lost to that fourteen year old boy that had met his father for the first time.

Slade didn't look back at her at first, his empty gaze just looked to the wall beyond. The cracks that ran up it and to the ceiling, his eyes focused on it for a moment as the numbness was seeping into his bones. Was there anything truly more interesting than a crack in a wall? The idea of something sturdy and to set up boundaries slowly splintering and damaging with time, there was something about it that memorized the strung out slade but before he could get to it the gentle but firm voice of Keira pulled her back to what was happening right now. So as a stream of blood rolled down Slade's nose past his lips and down his chin to stain his neck with blood he spoke.

"Never better." he said in a soft voice.

Reaching into his pocket he barely was able to pull out a pack of cigarettes, the same brand that he had at the club. Struggling as he did so he placed a cigarette into his blood covered lips then dropped the pack on the floor. He reached for his lighter and he was just so numb that he couldn't get a grasp around it, he couldn't flick the lighter to save his life. After a few tries his lighter slipped from his grasp and he fell onto the bed spread on the right side of his thigh between Keira and himself.

A tear ran down his face and the cigarette dropped between his legs as his eyes welled and watered up. A small chuckle escaped his mouth, a mix between a sob and laugh. He couldn't even light his own cigarette, there was a sad form of humor in that. He let out another little half cry half laugh and looked to Keira and spoke.

"Get a good look, what do you see?" he said letting another of the little sad chuckles.

 

[Keira Priest]

Not responding for a moment Keira picked up the cigarette and lighter both, bringing the cigarette to her lips and lighting it, exhaling smoke and raising it to his lips. This wasn't characteristic behavior for her, but she saw her own insecurities in him, mirrored in a man she would have never imagined meeting previously. In times previous she had suffered similarly, uncertain of her place among those she called friends, let alone the larger galaxy as a whole. Those same idle thoughts had the potential to plague her during long nights that seemed never-ending, when she wasn't able to find solace in sleep. They were thoughts she didn't enjoy dwelling on, things she would much rather move past and ignore if given the choice. But she understood all too well the hollow feeling that came with those nights.

A quiet sigh escaped her lips, and she stared off into space for a long moment, unsure of what she was doing there to begin with. It wasn't often others considered her one to talk to when it came to feelings like this. After all, she oftentimes had difficulties comprehending her own emotions, and dealing with some else's wasn't something she needed on her plate. It was hard enough to work through her own mind, and working through the tangled web of another's wasn't within her qualifications. If he was looking for support in her he would get it, but if he was looking for someone to help him through them, he was looking at entirely the wrong individual for the job. She was the one that consulted others herself, though that had been a one time thing itself.

The corners of her mouth tightened, and she tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear, looking to him with a shrug. "I see someone like me." She allowed those five words to hang in the air for a moment, letting him completely absorb their meaning. They were nearly one in the same, whether they would admit it or not. "Listen, I don't know what to tell you. It might get better, it might not. And yeah, it's not any fun." Advice like this wasn't her strong point by any means. "We're both karked up, I get that. Welcome to the real galaxy, it's not all glitter and gold like some people think." That was her own way of dealing with her feelings, pushing past them to focus on the more important task at hand, regarding them as something secondary to be worked through if time was allotted, which it rarely was.

Her voice was a few octaves quieter than was average, some of its usual confidence having dissipated. In any other scenario she was the one assuring someone else that things would improve if they tried, but even her ability to bluff her way through things faltered sometimes. This was who she was beneath the surface, underneath the layers of her self-assuredness and brash attitude. Underneath she was vulnerable, nearly always second-guessing herself, unsure of her own actions. There was a reason she never talked about her personal thoughts and feelings. They were simply too much. "It's going to hurt. It's going to hurt a lot, I won't lie. I don't know what you want to hear, but I'm not the one to talk to about this. I'm not the one for this. I can barely handle myself."

[member="Slade Zambrano"]

 

[Slade Zambrano]

[member="Keira Ticon"]

Slade took the cigarette between his lips and gave Keira a little nod of appreciation, and took a long drag from the cigarette. Letting the chemicals fester in his lungs for a moment he expelled them into the air with a sigh. With numb cold hands he placed the cigarette between his fingers and inhaled more of the relaxing poison soaked tobacco. Pulling the cigarette away from his mouth he exhaled and blew smoke towards the door of the building, he licked his lips afterwards and the sour taste of metallic blood coated his tongue mixing with the taste of smoke.

But he listened to Keira speak as he handed her the cigarette back to her, there was no need to be greedy after all. She was here for some reason and she wasn't even asking about the information, she was talking to him and how they were both cut from the same cloth. Maybe she was just polite, maybe they were more alike than he realized but either way there was a deep appreciation for her words. He didn't care much that she had little to say, it was just nice to hear a voice that wasn't his own.

"There are different types of pain Keira. Meaningful pain, and useless pain. I don't want you to tell me anything, because I already know what I am. I'm a self destructive self loathing child. There's no more meaningful pain you could give me." More hot tears ran down his face and he just stared ahead at that door blankly.

"Only useless pain." he said as he adjusted himself on the bed slightly.

Slade turned his gaze to Keira and lifted struggled to lift up his hand to place it gently on Keira's right cheek. He stared into her with his own blood shot eyes and it was like looking into a mirror. But as that reflection disappeared he saw her, he saw who she was and how they were alike. So he had to say something, his thumb brushed against her cheek and he spoke in a voice as quiet and unsure of himself as was hers.

"You go your whole life with others staring at you, asking why are you so fucked up. Why you are the way you are, because the galaxy they see as glitter and gold fucked us. But through all that damage, all that pain, it's shaped us into something unlike anything else. I told you what I see when I look at you, I see that driftwood masterpiece. I'm sorry I dragged you here Keira." slade let go of her face then tried to stand up.

His legs gave out and he plummeted to the floor where his ass hit the ground. With his back against the bed he raised his hand and pointed over to the desk by the mini fridge.

"Desk, files." he said then put his head back against the bed his body struggling to keep from shutting down.

 

[Keira Priest]

In truth Keira had forgotten why she'd bothered coming to the dreary hotel room in the first place, and for a moment she wasn't sure what he was talking about when he referred to the files. As he collapsed she knelt next to him, cigarette still perched at the corner of her mouth. Pressing two fingers to the underside of his wrist and then to the side of his neck she checked his pulse, finding it steady but weak. Well, drugs did tend to do that. Working among criminals had a way of exposing one to situations similar to this on a daily basis. To say she was accustomed to dealing with drug overdose regularly would be an understatement, but very basic first aid didn't escape her. Besides, her own intuition and the Force itself had a way of telling her exactly what she may have been missing.

Drawing what healing energy she could manage into her hands she attempted to expel the toxins from his body, knowing that she wouldn't be capable of anything beyond the very basics. If he was going to get through this, chances were he would need medical help beyond what she could offer. Thankfully they were on Antecedent. "Dammit, Slade." Taking his hand in hers she squeezed it, snapping her fingers in front of his eyes momentarily to attempt to bring them into focus. "Try and listen to me. We're getting you to the Dragon Palace so you can, I don't know, not die. As far as anyone there knows, you're one of my relatives. We'll sort out the trouble later." There were enough undiscovered Ticons in the galaxy, she figured, to make such a story plausible.

Whatever information he may have had was forgotten for the moment. She supposed she could return later to retrieve it, assuming it was still there. That was of little consequence now. "Work with me. We'll get a hover taxi." As gently as possible she pulled him to his feet, putting one of his arms around her shoulder for support, allowing him to lean on her as much as he needed. Slowly they began their walk out of the hotel, and she managed to flag down a hover taxi, giving the address of the Casino from memory. After living there for the majority of her life, it came easily. Keeping his hand in hers, she gave it another squeeze. Regardless of whatever comments he may have about this later, she knew that helping him was her best option, regardless of what her instincts would have told her in any other situation.

"Alright, come on." With a grunt of exertion she helped him out of the taxi, continuing their slow shuffle through the doors and to the medbay. Ignoring any immediate questions from those staff she merely explained the situation, using her name as a bypass to any invasive questions. There was a certain benefit to being in the upper echelons of the largest criminal syndicate in the galaxy, and this was merely one of them. Sitting down in a chair she waited to be called back, leaning her head back against the wall, only just remembering the cigarette still in her mouth. By this time it had burned down to nothing more than a stub, and, exhaling a final cloud of smoke into the deathly silent air, she put it out. Just don't die.

[member="Slade Zambrano"]

 

[Slade Zambrano]

[member="Keira Ticon"]

You're looking through a fog, everything is hazy and it's like looking through a white sheet. All you smell is the metallic stench of your own blood and taste the bile in your mouth. Everything is slow, but it's not? It looks normal, but it's just not. You feel like everything in your life has always been like this, should you do something? Why? What's the point? Everything just doesn't feel, and feeling never got you anywhere so why start now if it's always been like that. Slade looked through the haze and dimly saw movement around himself, something was happening. There was a light touch on him and soon the fog of confusion lessened a bit to the point where he could make out Keira taking his hand and snapping her fingers in front of him. His bloodshot eyes focused and shot over to the woman and he was slightly responsive, his pulse was still weak but what she had did bought him time.

Fear started to well up in Slade now, despite all his talk of pain and hatred he didn't want to die. Not like this at least, not on the floor of some crappy motel room. But he just couldn't do all that much, he was already strung out when he woke up and the added dosage of that sweet sweet endor pine while he was waiting for Keira was making him OD. Maybe this was a fitting end though, most Zambrano's didn't get the luxury of dying peacefully, just going numb and letting go. But then Keira started talking and by the sound of it she wanted to help him? That astonished Slade, truly it did. The file was right there and she didn't care about it, she wanted to help him instead. So when she gave him instructions he just nodded and somehow went from a hotel to a taxi.

City lights whizzed by his face and he looked out weakly raising his hand to try and catch it. His hand stopped on the glass and his head laid back as his breathing began to slacken and body began to relax more and more as everything seemed to just ease into a gaze of red. Everything felt good, maybe dying wasn't so bad. Red began to fade slowly then there was nothing but black, and that was it.

"Clear!" ​

With a deep inhale bright lights filled Slade's eyes and soon he found himself in a hospital bed stripped of his clothes with a steady stream of bacta or kolto whatever it was dripping into his system to heal and help purify the toxins In his body. Slade coughed and kept breathing until it steadied, afterwards he lifted up his hand and the force flowed through him and wrapped around the doctor's throat.

"Where is she! Did you harm her!?" he said still clearly delirious to what was going on.

Soon a nurse came to his side and calmed him letting him know what was going on. He quickly let go of the man and lay back in his seat now feeling very very weak and tired. He was stable and he was still slade, he let out a few long breaths and fought for a few minutes with the doctors about letting Keira see him. Once slade made it very clear what he'd do to them despite just saving his life a quick call was made to brunette sitting in the waiting room by a nurse letting her know that she could come see Slade. Some things never changed it seemed.

 

[Keira Priest]

By the time the nurse arrived in the waiting room Keira had drifted into some sort of state halfway between alertness and sleep, having become resigned to waiting. When her name was called she blinked, momentarily caught off guard before she remembered just where she was and what had happened. Giving her head one hard shake to clear it she slowly stepped into the sterile white halls of the medical wing, more of a small-scale hospital than anything. The sharp tang of antiseptics flooded her nostrils, but she pushed past it and forward, still in what could be called a semi-meditative state. In the doorway of the hospital room her amber gaze instantly found him where he lay on the bed, hooked up to a number of machines that were responsible for keeping him alive.

"You're an idiot, you know that?" And he was, really. Someone as smart as him should have known perfectly well how many drugs it would take for one to overdose, and it seemed he'd mixed himself a cocktail specifically designed to end his life. But he didn't seem the type to opt for such an easy way out. No, if he was as similar to her as he seemed, he would stubbornly cling to life until the circumstances somehow improved. Tenacity was what had brought him here, just as it had done the same for her. He might not have been Corellian, but he certainly harbored that same never-say-die attitude that the entire people shared. Still standing in the doorway she simply watched him for a moment, waiting for some type of response or indication that he even noticed she was here.

With barely audible steps she moved farther into the room, pulling a chair over and sitting down at his bedside, her eyes never once moving from his face. It was obvious he'd asked for her, or none of the medical staff would have so much as allowed her past where she had been waiting. This was an intentional move made by him, but she wouldn't have expected anything less, even in his weakened state. Even after being pulled back from the brink of death, he still had that same spark. If she didn't know better, she would have hit him for being so impossibly stupid. In the grand scheme of things, he should have been dead. Her past self, winding the clock back half a year, would have left him lying in that hotel room without a second thought, and not have batted an eye at whatever consequences may have followed her. But, somehow, she had changed. For some reason, she had brought him here.

"You're a karking idiot, Slade." More of the previous fire returned to voice. "You knew damn well what those drugs would do to you, but you decided to take them anyway. I can't imagine how absolutely stupid someone would have to be to do that." Never was she the one giving these sorts of lectures, but the words flowed from her mouth unbidden. "I get it. I get that this sucks. It does, and there isn't anything to do about it. But you don't have to go and do something so idiotic." Once upon a time she had gone to see a psychologist, shortly after the ordeal that had transpired in Unknown Space. There were just enough prescription meds in her apartment to do just what he had done, but she was still standing. Not that he would know that, but it should have told him something.

Sighing, she shook her head. "How about you stay here for awhile? Until you get all this chit figured out. We can find you a place, or you can bunk with me until we make something work." Since when had she been one for something like this? "It's obvious you need some kind of support, and for now this is the best you'll be able to get. It's not luxury, but it's better than living from day-to-day. Besides, I probably owe you something after all the trouble you've gone to get here, let alone find that information." Slowly her eyes found his again. "That sound like a deal to you?" Not that she was very good at taking no for an answer, once she had her mind set to something. Others could testify to that much. She was anything if not fiercely stubborn.

[member="Slade Zambrano"]

 

[Slade Zambrano]

[member="Keira Ticon"]

A few minutes had passed sense Slade had the doctors send for Keira, and it gave him time to reflect on things for a moment. He had died, become one with the force, punched a one way ticket to blue ghost town to kick it with Obiwan and Yoda. And as Private Hicks would say it was game over man, but it wasn't just yet. He was alive and here again, maybe he had a problem with drugs and alcohol, well he knew that already but at least he was still here and could maybe fix that.

Another minute passed and soon the silence ended with the lovely sound of Keira calling him an idiot twice. He almost smiled at that but decided now wasn't really the time, though even smiling he was probably physically incapable of doing. So Slade looked over at her and really listened to what she had to say, and really it touched him. No one had ever really opened up their home to him, like ever. The moment they knew who he was they would either try to kill him or ransom him or worse. Those were the typical reactions for the men in the Zambrano family and he wasn't particularly happy about them. But Keira, she offered to help him. She offered him a place to stay and he really had no choice but to say yes to the woman, he was a wreck and more than likely the safest place for him to be was with her. So he sat up in his bed a bit and groaned as he did so and he said what any grateful person who was starting to feel attraction for a beautiful woman would say in this situation.

"You're damn right you owe me, you have no idea how much drug money that information cost. I almost had to blow a dude I mean can you imagine me doing that?" he said with a pause.

"Don't answer that." he said very monotone.

But a weak smile touched his features as he coughed and lay back in his bed, his hand reached out to Keira and he took it in his own. His dirty and dried blood crusted fingers gently squeezed hers in a moment of complete sincerity and gratitude for the woman. He was happy to have her in his life, even if there wasn't anything going on between the two of them. But he looked up at her from his bed and into her beautiful eyes and spoke to her softly.

"Deal." he said with that soft and warm smile that could melt the coldest of hearts.

"Besides it wouldn't be fair to you, we all know how you swooned over me at the club." he wanted to try and lighten the mood and change the subject.

What had happened back there, what had happened between them was something different, something special. If this had been the younger slade and the positions were reversed he would of left her for dead as well, but if he thought about it he would of done anything to save her life. Yeah she was beautiful and yes they both had personality traits that matched up, but the thought of what they shared in that room, dragging him to the hospital, emotions and feelings that weren't lust. Those scared slade and he didn't want to address that, and he was sure Keira didn't want to either, so it was better this way.

"But I suppose spending a few days with the common rabble could be humbling." he said sounding like his younger self trying his best to not make it completely obvious he was trying to cover up what the two had shared.

 

[Keira Priest]

There it was, the same snark Keira had faced back in the club. It seemed as if no time at all had passed since them meeting there and where they currently sat. And if it hadn't been for his laying in a hospital bed, she would have almost believed it. But there was something there, beneath the surface, that she could just barely sense. Something that hinted at his hiding something more beneath the surface, instead of simply trading insults back and forth like they had previously. Perhaps he was trying to keep something hidden from her, something that he didn't want to admit, even to himself. It left her curious, but even she knew when it was best not to push the limits and simply let things remain where they were, secret or no. Pushing someone in his state wasn't a wise decision by any means.

Still, she couldn't help but flash a smile at all that he had to say. His sense of humor could leave something to be desired in certain scenarios, but she had adjusted to it by now, where others may have been at a loss. And that meant she could retort with her own brand of sarcasm, but now wasn't the time. "Keep telling yourself that. Maybe you'll learn one day." The chances of that were slim to none, and it was almost laughable that she had even imagined such. But with their trading words back and forth things seemed almost normal, as if he was just another Raven and not one she would otherwise be crossing blades with should they have met on the battlefield. Somehow he had crossed that line to become what she could, perhaps, call a friend.

The average situation for her when it came to people like this was quite literally fighting for her life on just another battlefield, so this was a nice change of pace. Normally those insults they threw back and forth would be punctuated by the clash of weapons and various Force abilities, but this time they were merely interspersed by the quiet beeps and hums of various medical equipment that surrounded the two. It was an alien thing, simply caring about him enough to bother bringing him to the hospital, and she wasn't sure how to properly work through those feelings. It was situations such as this in which she was truly out of her depth. Life-threatening combat she could handle, even thrive in, but this was nearly the opposite. It was funny how things worked.

"You'll do just fine among the Ravens, I think. Trust me, we're far from being the common rabble. None of us would have survived for so long in the business otherwise." The 'business' she was referring to was no doubt the opportunities that spanned the criminal underworld as a whole. He may have been fit to survive on his own in certain scenarios that were similar, but she had difficulties imagining him living among those of the same caliber of the syndicate she called home. It wasn't that he seemed too soft around the edges, but he simply didn't look the type to have any wish to mingle with what most referred to as 'her kind'. "I would recommend not telling the rest of them who your dad is. The Sith aren't exactly loved here, in case you haven't noticed. You might have to pretend to be a Ticon for just a bit longer than you'd like."

[member="Slade Zambrano"]

 

[Slade Zambrano]

[member="Keira Ticon"]

"Oh I will keep telling myself that." Slade said with his tired smile.

So Slade relaxed physically knowing he had a place to stay for a while, even if it was with a quasi enemy. Not that Keira was an enemy, she wasn't at all. Hell she was the closet thing Slade had to an actual friend and his heart told him that he wanted her in his life, and spending time with her was a good thing despite how much his head told him to get out of there and get another fix. She was a drug, maybe he was growing an addiction to her but regardless he'd have time to think about these things later. But the entire time something came to him, he was still holding her hand. Tenderly as well, and the two of given didn't seem to even notice. It just felt natural and right, like he should of been holding her hand and a lot more at that.

So he didn't immediately jerk his hand away when he realized that he just gently slipped his hand from hers and lay there in his hospital gown tired and feeling weary. He tried say something to her, something important. Was it a joke? Intel? It was something but that weariness just flooded over him and his senses longed for rest, his eyes began to flutter and he simply looked up at Keira's face as everything grew dark around him. He began to mouth something to her, it started with a B and he barely got to it before sleep took him.

Beautiful

He dove deep, in total blackness, into dead sleep where dreams wouldn't dream, and darkness was eternal. His chest rose up and down slowly as deep long breaths inhaled and exhaled outward. The man was truly a wreck, they both were even. Just two broken people in the galaxy maybe trying to do the right thing for once in a very long time. Whatever they were to one another, it was time to rest. Slade was going to have a very long week of withdrawals and pain.

 

[Keira Priest]

*a few weeks later, Keira's room, Dragon Palace upstairs*​

0700 A.M​

​

Amber eyes opened as if on their own sort of automatic timer, regarding the room about her in a half-awake stupor. At the sight of the smaller bed that was currently occupied, more akin to a cot than anything, Keira was given pause for a moment. It had never fully registered in her mind, the thought of having a roommate, and she was still adjusting to not having the small apartment to herself. The arrangement had been established in the weeks previous, something she herself had surprisingly instigated. Just as surprisingly, he had agreed, and so the two had been living together since that day in the medical wing of the Dragon Palace Casino, after a nearly fatal overdose that had almost killed the man in question. Those circumstances had sparked what could be called their acquaintance, and brought them to where they were that early morning.

Reaching up with a hand she rubbed the sleep from her eyes, black makeup smudging on her fingertips as they fell from her eyelids. Slowly she stretched, her back arching, and she yawned near-silently. Only then did she roll over to her side and sit up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. With one hand she attempted to straighten her hair into some semblance of order, running her fingers through the brunette locks and smoothing them to some degree but not completely maneuvering through the tangles. It would have to suffice, until she was able to shower later in the morning. Glancing down she noted that she'd fallen asleep in her clothes from the day previous, the dark Corellian leather jacket she still wore a testament to that. Shrugging, she levered herself onto the ladder that connected her bed to the floor, stretching again once bare feet hit carpet.

Briefly she glanced to [member="Slade Zambrano"]'s supposedly sleeping form, shrugging and deciding to move on with her own day. Stepping over to the fridge beneath her bed she retrieved a bottle of water, twisting it open and sipping at it, sealing it closed and holding it to her head, still nursing a vague headache that had blossomed courtesy of the night previous. With a quiet sigh she sat down at her desk, booting up the computer there and skimming over what minute information was available to her, soon after spinning around in the chair to face the room only dimly lit by the holoprojected screen, Slade's sleeping form still mostly in darkness. This was a strange sort of peace, and one she had never become fully acquainted with.

Remaining seated, she set the water bottle down on the desk, once more running a hand through her hair. It's quiet.

 

[Slade Zambrano]

[member="Keira Ticon"]

Slade was woken by the woman when she began her daily little routine, his eyes opened and he remained on his side with his back facing her. He remained still and let everything come to him as he lay on his little cot underneath some thin sheets. He exhaled a steady stream of air and a feeling of peace hit him and it was the first time he had ever really felt like this, living with Keira had been something he needed and it was pretty great despite the two of them sharing a tiny apartment that normally would be reserved for a student off to college. It certainly wasn't built for two but they both had made it work over the last few weeks. So slade remained where he was then spoke in a voice so he could be heard by the woman.

"You have the cutest little snores and sleep talk." Slade said as if he were just stating a fact and not just teasing the Corellian.

"You should of seen it, I would of recorded it but then that would of been creepy." he said now in a half joking voice.

The sheets slide down his body to reveal much of the same for Slade as they did Keira. With the only exception that he was shirtless, however his pants and belt were still on his body. The man got stretched slightly and got up reaching into his pocket to grab a pack of cigarettes he placed one in his lips then took his lighter flicking it to ignite the little coffin nail.

Slade had been hitting the gym, like a lot. He needed a hobby while he was going through withdrawals and it turned out working out was it. He had gone from a scrawny drug addict in the past few weeks to a well toned and bearded man capable of benching a fair amount. But weight lifting bantha crap aside he looked well and healthy now thanks to Keira and despite the smoking he was ten times healthier than he had ever been. His gaze shifted over to Keira and he walked over to the woman sitting at her computer and he needed to express his gratitude to her. Over the last few weeks he hadn't really thanked her for what she was doing and he kept up his wall, but seeing himself in the mirror he knew she was to thank for all of this. Slade took the cigarette and placed it between his fingertips.

So the man wrapped his now strong arms around Keira's collar bone and pressed his face into the gap between her shoulder and neck. He wasn't about to start kissing up on her or anything of the sort but he did speak while he was in there and it was really the first time he was sober and sincere with her.

"Thank you Keira, you saved me. There's no way I can ever repay you and I just-" slade exhaled warm breath on her neck as he chose his next words carefully.

"I just wanted to tell you that you have to be the most beautiful person I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. Inside and out, and if you ever need anything I'm here for you at anytime." slade said before letting go of the woman.

He didn't want to admit anything to himself but he was starting to have feelings for her and strong ones at that. He pulled up a chair next to her and sat down in his expensive slacks. Bringing the cigarette up he inhaled then passed it over to Keira in a gesture that was offering her a drag.

 

[Keira Priest]

Just as soon as he woke up he was back to his old routine, which included nothing more than the usual sarcastic comments that managed to be different each morning despite the amount of time they had traded quips back and forth. Her only real retaliation to the everyday routine was a half-smile, and she spun around in her chair to face him, blinking in surprise when he hugged her. Slowly she returned the embrace, listening silently to what he had to say, any form of physical affection an entirely foreign thing. This was the first time he had been entirely genuine with her, his words the product of his own mind rather than whatever substances were currently coursing through his veins. It was the first time anyone had said anything of that sort to begin with in referring to her, and there wasn't a proper response that she could think up.

When he offered the cigarette she took it, pulling smoke into her lungs and letting it sit there, finally exhaling and passing it back. Still she remained silent, unsure of what words she could speak that would return what he had said in kind. "You don't have to thank me. You shouldn't have to." That was a start, at least, though hardly much of one in any respect. "I just...I don't know." Sighing quietly, Keira tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I saved you because I didn't want you to end up like me. No one should. You don't want to live like me, just wandering through life with no real purpose." Her amber gaze remained steadily on him, betraying little emotion despite the weight of her words. She had learned early not to show others her true feelings, something that had only been expedited with recent happenings.

"I'm glad I was able to help you, because you need better. You deserve it." Her voice was quiet, half because she didn't want to wake any others that were still asleep on the same floor, and half because she was just as uncertain in what she was saying as she had been earlier in that hotel room. "I want you to be able to move on to better things, past this and the Ravens. You're able to." In her life she had become intrinsically woven into the fabric of the criminal underworld, and it was something she knew there wasn't an escape from, regardless of whether she had wished it was possible or not. But she didn't want to abandon what ties she had formed here on Antecedent, not really. The Ravens had become her family, and she was fiercely loyal once she had deemed another worthy of such a title.

The muscles of her jaw ticced slightly, and she absently drummed her fingers on the desk. "It's good that you like it here, though. I know it's small, but it works." Now she was talking just to pass the time, and fill the silence that had sprung from all that was said previously. Chewing the inside of her cheek, she shook her head. "I'm not good with talking about stuff like this, I know. It's just weird for me."

[member="Slade Zambrano"]

 

[Slade Zambrano]

[member="Keira Ticon"]

Slade stared at Keira as she talked about not wanting to end up like her, he understood that. But Slade was right there with her when it came to wandering through life, and no one had ever treated him like Keira had and it made him want to be around her. Not even in a romantic manner, not to be misunderstood slade had to restrain himself a lot these days living with the woman. Being in a cramped apartment you often ran into each other or accidentally brushed up against something, and for a man that was really the only thing they needed to be in the forward and upright locked position. But Slade actually respected Keira enough to not try anything and that had never happened before with a woman, he had never met a woman that could match him in both whit and emotional baggage. Maybe this was a bad idea, maybe even thinking about being with her was just dangerous.

But Slade just listened to her talk and knew that she hurt as much as he did on the inside, and when he was with her or she was with him life just sucked a little less than it normally did. Zambrano, Ticon, Solo, or Skywalker, it didn't matter. They were just people when they were together and he loved that, he loved this little place and no matter what he told himself he was starting to feel what love was. And it was completely foreign to him. His mother was a slave girl who his father had probably had against her will, and he never received even love from his mother. There had been women growing up but that had just been lust, and this wasn't that. He didn't know what to do so he just listened to what his heart told him to do.

It told him there wasn't a need for long drawn out conversations about their past, it told him that he didn't need to tell her how damaged they both were, or that he didn't want to move on, he wanted to stay right here with her, and he wanted to kiss her. So his hand motioned for the cigarette she held but then stopped, his heart told him what he needed to do. So his hand guided over to her free hand and it gently wrapped around her fingers and palm with a soft and gentle squeeze. He looked her in the eyes and the corners of his mouth lifted slightly to give her a warm and soft smile. He spoke and he kept it brief, there wasn't a need to explain himself since they both weren't good at talking about these things.

"You need someone to wander down that road with you?" He said to her softly.

It meant that he didn't want to move on to bigger and better things, sure he could always do jobs and work for the remnant but at the end of the day he wanted to be with Keira and be by her side whether it be as a friend or something more. And it was evident in the way he said it, that no matter what he was to her he would be around because his heart told him to.

 

[Keira Priest]

There were a lot of things Keira needed in her life, that much was certain. It varied from simple support such as this, to areas far more complex and intricate in nature. The offer made was straightforward on the surface, seemingly effortless to follow through with. Only with a deeper glimpse into both of their psyches did things become far more difficult for both parties. Life had not dealt either of them the kindest of cards, and such hands were bound to take their toll eventually. The both of them were far from sound in that respect, any bonds formed tenacious and short-lived, sporadic and springing up with little warning, tearing themselves down just as easily. For her part it was a challenge to instigate anything of the sort in the first place, there seeming to be a void where once those ties would have been forged. As if there were an empty, hollow space inside of her, vacant of all life.

It was for that same reason she often shied away from others in the first place. There were very few in her life she could ever remember explicitly trusting, and that trust had disintegrated into nothing as time passed of its own accord. Those experiences had left her unable and unwilling to believe what another had to say beyond the motives of the statement itself, a fault that left her without any sort of support, something she had adapted to rather quickly. After all, it was always easier when the only individual you had to look out for was yourself. It certainly wasn't the best or most productive way to go about life, but at the time it had been the only method of survival that she could glimpse at. Any sort of healthy relationship had been sorely lacking, as had been the case for what felt like years.

Her first instinct when he took her hand was to pull hers away, and she almost did, but both his gentle manner and the softly spoken question stopped her in her tracks. The corners of her mouth tightened, her brow furrowing slightly, and for a long moment she didn't look up from where their fingers were intertwined. Any sort of physical contact in her realm of reality was typically of the more violent sort. Never had another been so careful with her, so quiet, their manner almost hesitant in nature. In every aspect this was an alien encounter, and she was at a loss for what to do. It wasn't something as dangerous as combat that had her frozen, but simple conversation and initiated physical contact. What a galaxy the both of them lived in, for such a thing to be true.

Slowly her gaze lifted to meet his own, that same self-doubt never more blatant until that moment. This wasn't the brash and bold Corellian everyone was used to seeing. This was her with those walls beginning to crack out of nothing more than sheer exhaustion from having to keep them raised for ages. This was her own emotional numbness finally beginning to subside while still attempting to reinstate its hold, reminding her what happened the last time she decided to let someone in. These scenarios had never ended well for her, and past experience told her to cut things off before they began. But she had never been the type to listen to her own better judgement. "That would be..." A small, hesitant smile turned up the corners of her mouth. "That would be nice."

[member="Slade Zambrano"]