Private If The World Was Ending

[Desbre Gensan]

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Location: Anse's moon, Unknown Regions​

Equipment: Racing suit and athletic gear, Silver Sigil, constructed lightsaber, light-filtering lenses, Hush-style comlink, aquata breather, liquid-cable launcher, stim pills, nutrient/food pack​

Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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It had been quite a while since she'd seen Anse. Her mind turned to him as it had often in the last few days. That piece of music still played in her mind that made her think of him. And of Milya too. But mostly Anse. And a couple more. But always Anse.

She realized she missed him terribly, more than most anyone she'd met that wasn't blood. Sure, she missed them too. Her sister, parents, even her grandfather.

Ahead the mottled sky of hyperspace shattered into starlines that shrank to pinpricks. Fingers danced over the boards and the viewscreen shimmered, shifting to show navigational and course data. "A little off the mark," she muttered.

For mostly uncharted space, that was pretty good. Reaching up overhead she flicked a few switches and then brought the ship around. Drive cones flared to life and within moments the moon was growing in her viewscreen.

Reaching out with her senses, she knew where to look. After a minute, she felt ... him. Her consciousness brushed against his, soft as powdered snow. ~I'm coming down the well. See you soon.~ The modified Loronar B-7 began to shudder as she caught the edges of atmospheric chop. Another flick of a switch angled the deflector shields, and the ride smoothed out. Another flick killed the sublights and cut in the repulsors, but she was in freefall for the moment.

BOOM!-BOOM!

The double sonic boom of a ship de-orbiting and coming in at high speed ripped through the upper atmosphere. Not enough to be a real disturbance, but she wasn't being quiet and wanted to get down fast. Moments later the once-crashed vessel came into view, dropping straight down then shifting into a neat arc dropping down and skimming over the water. Just before hitting the waterfall it slowed significantly. Just inside the watery curtain it stopped, then scooted forward and spun about, hull ticking rapidly under the heat exchange. Landing struts extended and the ship settled on its belly.

Moments later the side hatch opened and a familiar pale-skinned figure stepped out. Reaching out with her senses, physical and within the Force, she made a quick search for Anse.

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
The smell of blood. Most nights he slept peacefully, but the last few he’d been restless and edgy. Nothing seemed to calm him down and when he finally got rest? Images of a past he wished would stay dead came back. His home was isolated for a good reason, when he was so he usually let Ogrimm run wild because at least he could trust his soul-brother not to get up to some kind of trouble just for amusement. Too much fighting. It never seemed to end and he always ended up picking a side, always adding more red and more dead.

He hadn’t even had the drive to seek out some comfort. Not since he met Desbre. It always came back to her in the end. He’d be out wandering and a likely lass would catch his eye, but almost immediately he’d be turned off. Something would stick that just didn’t appeal and poof, gone. He was stuck on her and couldn’t shake it, and didn't want to either. She’d be gone for months at a time and he didn’t even feel up to just looking because they weren’t who he wanted to look for.

~I'm coming down the well. See you soon.~

One moment he was sleeping in bed, the next a massive golden wolf shrugged off the blankets, sniffing the air. A sound, faint because of deep stone and raging water, but the sound of an engine his ears were familiar with. His brush of a tail lifted with a lazy swing, she was here. Breaths later the hangar was less empty, Ogrimm padded over as the ramp lowered. He’d been shy in the past, never quite letting her get close or even touch, but not this time. No, he boldly as he pleased bounded up to meet her and then as gently as possible, buried his face under her arm with a long whine.

It was her scent that did it, getting through the battles and pain that played in the other half of their shared space. Anse was suddenly present and the wolf shifted back because his human could do what he couldn’t. Their form melted away and Des would find herself lifted up and hugged. “Welcome home lass, I be missing you something fierce. Ye be th’ answer to many a prayer.”

He looked tired, maybe a bit thinner, but otherwise well enough.

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Location: Anse's garage​

Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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The approaching lupine form was slightly startling. Des fought the urge to reach for a weapon, a momentary instinct more than anything. But at the same time she knew it was who she was here to see. Some things were just unmistakable no matter their presentation. When Orgrimm buried his face against her she gave him a small smile and shifted to give him an affectionate scratch behind both ears, mixed with some good ear rubs and then scrubbing her nails along his neck and jawline. "Hey you," she murmured. Then a moment later Ogrimm stepped back just enough. Parts shortened and others elongated, fur receded, and in a few seconds, Anse was there.

His iron-strong arms lifted her off the ground, drawing out a squeak of pleased surprise. She slipped both arms around him tight. She still wasn't sure about the home part. In truth she wasn't sure she belonged anywhere."I missed you too," she said quietly, running her fingers through his hair, waiting for him to put her down.

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
It seemed his welcome didn’t quite do what he intended. This brought a twinge of pain to his chest, but he covered it up with a warm grin. “Ye did? Now I be a bit sad eh? Here I be hoping th’ travels ye be doing be giving you much joy, but if ye be missing me then tha’ not be th’ case.”

Truth was now that she was here, it felt like he’d been starving, but he didn’t say that either. Last thing he wanted was to make her feel guilty, especially when he wanted her smiling. He set her down then, her position was probably a bit uncomfortable right then. “Want me to make food? I be needing a bit of a wash, but I can fix ye a bite to eat then wash up if ye want.”

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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Make was as far as he got before she almost slammed into him, so tight and fierce was the embrace she threw around him. Surprisingly strong for her stature, her own grip was like iron. It wasn't hard to imagine her hoisting him off the ground like it was nothing. Even Ogrimm she could have lifted. Her embrace would have been painful if she wanted it, but she merely clung to him for a few moments, then pushed back.

"Food sounds good, but... I have something to tell you, and it can't really wait. Or at least I don't really want to. It... absolutely can wait." She chewed her lower lip then.
At graduation, there'd been changes compared to how she'd been that first stay here. Her hair had a neon blue streak in it then, and still did. She seemed less haunted. Her eyes were no longer surrounded by dark circles, or at least not as strong. She was resting, sleeping. She'd put on a little weight, but not much, just enough fat to power the new muscle mass she'd put on. Healthy, much healthier than she'd been when she left.

She wore dark boots and a racing jumpsuit that clung to her like it was painted on, except it was open at the top, and hung off her waist, the sleeves tied up to keep it in place. An athletic top kept everything in check. The racing suit was white with charcoal gray strips of hexagonal panels designed to protect her in a skid. The whole design was artful and meant to both protect and accentuate, make her aerodynamic and comfortable for long hours in the seat. She would have looked right at home on any racing circuit.

Her left shoulder and upper arm had a tribal design, and there was a charm bracelet at her left wrist. Reaching up she ran her fingers through her loose hair then let it spill back down around her head.

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
The tight hug stole his breath a little, but he didn’t mind it, after all, he’d given her near crushing ones himself. He didn’t have to be as gentle with her as he has had to with others and it was probably the same for her. A look of concern flashed across his face at her revelation of news, then came internal bracing. A statement like that, at least in past experience, never led anywhere good. He gave her a wry smile. “Alright lass, but can we be going to find me a seat? If this be th’ kind of news tha’ steals one’s legs from under them I be wanting to sit for it.”

The few changes he noted, looked positive. They hadn’t met under ideal circumstances and had been sort of playing a game of chase with each other for a while now. His first instinct was that she was about to tell him she was going to cut the thread they shared. He didn’t want to see her go, but if that was what she wanted? He couldn’t force her to stay attached to him. He pushed that from his mind because that was the worst that came to mind. The other? Had she gotten pregnant somehow? Stars knew he took care of that, but nature found a way and nothing was one hundred percent. This of course gave him a wobbly feeling in his gut. Did he want a family? Of course he did, eventually, under ideal circumstances, but he’d never turn a lass away if she came to his door with a child that was his. Besides, Desbre was the sort of woman who he could see as a fantastic mother.

Again, he shoved that from his mind too. He really wasn’t used to getting things sort of dropped at his feet and with the nightmares he’d been having, well, he was a bit predisposed to expecting the unpleasant. Not that his second line of thought was unpleasant, but would certainly be a shock. He did his best from trying to anticipate what she was going to say, no good would come from it.

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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She could feel the rising anxiety and panic rolling off of him, in addition to his words. Reaching up quickly she took his face in her hands. "It's okay. I think you'll be happy," she said. I hope, anyway. Slipping one hand down, she took his right hand in her left and lead him toward the interior of his cavernous hideout, then shifted him to lead her.

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
He led her to the kitchen and leaned on the counter, he didn’t sit, but his anxiety ebbed. If it was good news, then he’d certainly welcome it, but regardless he wanted to hear what she had to say. “Go on then lass, I wanna hear whatever this news is.”

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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She took a seat at the table, the one she'd sort of made 'hers' when she'd been here last. Turning toward him she leaned forward, elbows resting on her knees, fidgeting with her hands. Why was she suddenly so nervous? Why did it feel like she was standing on the edge of a cliff, about to jump off? Even that wasn't scary anymore. Des took a trembling breath.

"So... this is so stupid." It was all she said at first. Chewing her bottom lip, she found her vision turning a little watery. Steady. At the same time there was a growing ache in her chest as her mind went back.

"It's funny how the simplest thing can make things so much clearer," she said, then wiped at the corner of one eye. "I was listening to one of the entertainment bands, and this song came on. It was between two lovers, and if the world was ending. They weren't necessarily soulmates or anything. And they'd broken up, but still cared about each other.., had feelings for each other. They'd wanna spend what little time they had left together." A tear ran down her left cheek, then one down her right. A small sniffle. She ignored the tears, save for a second one that ran down and hit the corner of her lips.

A moment later she wiped her face. "When I heard that song it... hit me like a hovertruck. All I could see. All I could think about. All I could feel was that moment. And over and over it was you that came to mind. And I realized how much if.. everything was really ending like that... I'd want to spend it with you." She couldn't really see now, and her face was a mess. It was a miracle she could speak so clearly. "It made me realize how much you mean to me. How much I care about you. I love you, Anse Baenshaol. I have for a long time. I'm sorry it took so long to realize it. And it's also completely stupid, on my part. And I don't frackin' care. And this might be idiotic, but... I had to tell you, and the holonet just doesn't cut it." As she finished she seemed to settle.

Whether or not he accepted that. Whatever he did with it... she felt better getting it out. In that moment, despite everything else, she was ... calm, resigned. Whatever happened next was out of her hands.

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
Her words stole his breath. Was he dreaming? He shifted and his body moved, he knelt in front of her and cupped her face in his hands, fingers trembling. “I… I love ye too lass. I have for a while now, I just never said cuz ye be in a place tha’ ye probably didn’t have room for it yet. I don’t want ye thinking I be expecting more than we have, all I be wanting is ye to be happy. Just… Just know tha’ I be willing to run to ye if ye call and need me, or if ye be asking me to go with ye, okay? Anything ye need or be wanting from me, ye don’t have to ask, it be yours.”

He’d said as much before. He was always willing to accept however much she could give him, even if it was a single grain of rice and he never tried to hound her for more. Even just a fragment was enough, because it was her and it was as precious and more than anything a person could put a price on to him. His heart was pounding in his chest, he still couldn’t believe it.

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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There were so many gaping wounds in her spirit. Holes left behind by family and friends. And where they'd used to be. And teachers. Punishing herself for things that in reality hadn't ever been her fault. So many times she'd been made to feel she wasn't enough. Wasn't good enough. Was a failure. Stupid, idiotic child. Rebellious little witch. And maybe there was some truth to that. Even her parents' deaths were blamed on her. Or at least she felt like they were in the day. Everyone she loved or cared about hurt her, betrayed her, vanished, or died. Or all of those things.

But hope. Hope. The tiniest candle holds back the dark. She was often that hope for others. How many people had she saved. Helped? Thousands. And sure she had a few she cared about now. But nothing and nobody like him. He'd given her shelter, safety, made her feel protected and cared for in a way that wasn't teacher-student, or formalized in some way. Sure he'd told her more than once he cared about her, and she knew it on some level. it just... seemed different compared to now, somehow. Maybe it was her and she could receive at least a little bit of it.

As he finished speaking, she was suddenly in his arms once again, buried against him, holding on tight. A few more sobs escaped her, a mixture of happy, and relieved, but also so much, black... nasty stuff boiling to the surface and being scraped away. Sure it sucked, but it was needed for healing. Cleaning out the wounds. For the moment she clung tight, and as much as she sobbed softly, hot tears falling free, it was not so hard and gith. After a few minutes she settled again, but still clung to him, as though she were afraid he'd disappear on her if she let go.

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
There was still so much pain in her. He’d heard some of it, but he felt the release of more. He rubbed her back and let her cry it out. Time was what would help, but she also needed so badly. “Ye be safe here lass, with me, ye always will be.”

He knew she needed to hear that, she had so many wounds from being rejected, tossed aside or vanished on. Too many people have let her down and he was one of few who hadn’t. What she had given him now? Was something incredibly important and he valued her so much. If he could reach out and stab each person who had left such deep pain on her he would have. People could be so thoughtless, so selfish and so cruel.

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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Des stayed put, still holding onto him, listening . She knew what he said was true. He didn't have to say it. If it wasn't true, she wouldn't have been there. Wouldn't have come all this way.​

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Acceptance wasn't something she'd felt much. Sure she'd been accepted for training. Had a few friends in the Order, but the people she really looked up to kept vanishing. At the time she'd thought it was her fault. But ... really, it was all down to the limits of the resources of the day. The Silver Jedi Order proved to have vast resources and many many Jedi. Things had improved. For a time, she'd had much of what she was looking for. Only to realize that... in many ways things had gotten lost over the centuries. In some ways, she felt as though the old school values had gotten lost.​

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But Anse was different. He was no teacher. A friend, for sure. But he was so much more than that. Her mind wandered back to the cave on Dagobah, and Ellie's face floated in her mind's eye.​

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"You left us behind." The voice was all too familiar. Memories flooded back of nights spent skin to skin, tangled together in sheets, wishing the world outside didn't exist. Normally silky sweet, Elidea's voice was dripping with disgust. "You left me. So much for love."

She held onto Anse tighter for a moment. Another quiet, choked sob ripped free of her throat. Was this another betrayal? Was she turning her back on Ellie? Even though she was a ghost now. It felt too big. Too much right then to think about. And despite Anse, she felt so small and helpless. Focusing on him, she just did her best to bury into him. The feeling of his arms around her, his fingers in her hair helped chase away the pain, slowly soothing her nerves. chasing away the dark visions, soothing the inner scars left behind from the losses.

Finally becoming aware that she had him in such an awkward position she pushed back, and slowly wiped her face. "Sorry," she said, waving one hand vaguely to how he was perched.. Turning a little, she rested her elbows on the table, Left more than right, practically leaning against it. her fingertips went to massaging her temples. Canceling the pain out would have been hardly a thought, but it didn't solve the problem. Better to fix the problem, or it would just be worse later.​

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
When she pulled away and apologized he stared at her for a moment then shook his head. For some reason he felt an incredible amount of fury rise up at that apology, but also because of her pain. He stood up and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and letting it slowly out. He felt powerless. Her pain, anyones really, but especially hers made him want to bite and savage things. When he looked at her, his blue eyes blazed gold, such was the intensity of his emotions that Ogrimm pressed close. “Don’t ever apologize for feeling as ye do. I don’t care what position I am in, nor how uncomfy, because what ye be feeling is more important than an awkward position.”

He brushed some hair from his face, trying to simmer down the deluge of emotions he felt. Someone as good and kind as her should have laughter instead of tears. He reached out to rest a hand on hers needing a comforting touch, it helped a little, but he then grabbed a chair and plunked it down next to her so he could sit down and pull her close again. “Just let yourself feel, for however long you be feeling what ye feel, okay?”

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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The explosiveness of his anger caught her off guard. It was like sitting next to a burning building. It was hard not to feel she'd done something wrong, and when he spoke she shrank away. Her expression was wary. If he attacked her she could handle it of course. That didn't bother her as much as the idea that he might. Not that she thought he really would. But in the heat of the moment, it wasn't hard to imagine him backhanding her. A sick feeling settled in her stomach for just a moment. He wasn't like that. Was he? How well did she really know him? Pretty well, she thought. Otherwise she wouldn't have been there. wouldn't have opened up to him like that.​

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When he went to pull her close she was stiff, resistant, but then went slowly. His intent wasn't on attacking, of course. It was focused elsewhere. But the momentary desire for violence... with no outlet or real target? How hard would it be to land on her?

Though she leaned against him, she was tense, and small and quiet.​

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
He noticed her reaction immediately and his heart dropped to somewhere near his feet. He let her pull away trying to figure out what he’d done wrong. Only thing he could think of was his fury, which only made him feel that much worse. “Ah fuck…”

He scrubbed at his face feeling all kinds of ashamed, he hadn’t meant to scare her and he could smell her fear, feel her anxiety on his skin. “It wasn’t you, I promise. Ye were so sad and I just felt so helpless. Ye shouldn’t be having so much pain.”

He flailed around internally trying to think of something, anything, to show her he didn’t mean to cause her fear. He stood up and swallowed. “Ye need me to leave? I can go or just move away…”

 

[Desbre Gensan]

Tag: Anse Baenshaol​

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She only straightened up, then sighed. "Stop. Just... stop," she said quietly, and gestured back toward his chair. "I know you aren't or weren't angry with me. But that level of intensity ... that boils over real fast in people. And for a moment, you're in another time and place. One wrong movement or sound could snap you out of it and then suddenly I'm having to keep from getting pounded into red paste on the floor. Before you even realize what you're doing. Do I think that would happen? No. Could it? Sure." She shook her head and sighed. "I'd rather not have to test the theory or worry about it."

She gave him a small, brave little smile. "I'm honored and flattered that you're angry on my behalf. Really. It's touching. But it's not useful to you. Or to me. Not in this instance. When the slavers were after me? That was one thing. And I get that you two want to protect me. But there's nothing to protect me from. And I don't need it. I'm a big girl, and way more capable of fighting my own battles than you know." She reached out placing one hand on his arm as she spoke. Her gaze traveled up, locking eyes with him. Her hand on his arm gave a gentle but firm squeeze. "I don't need a protector. I need a partner. Though the protection is nice." She smiled a little more. "Just don't make me worry about having to protect myself from you."

She cleared her throat and scooted a little closer. "There are a lot of things that have happened with me that you're never going to be able to fix. And can't protect me from because they already happened. And even if it had been yesterday, instead of centuries ago, it wouldn't matter how hard you wanted to. It wouldn't change anything. And I wouldn't necessarily want you to." She cleared her throat a little.

"I'm still up for food. I'm actually kinda starving," she said. Whether she was or wasn't mattered little. it would give him something to do and focus on while they talked.​

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"On my homeworld, if I'm having a problem with someone... going off half-cocked and getting in someone's face on my behalf. Or worse, hurting, or even killing them would only make the situation worse for both of us. You'd wind up in prison or dead. And then... I'd have nine kinds of hell cleaning things up. If I even could."

She tapped the table with one nail a few times, thinking. "I don't think I could apologize hard enough. There's no gift that I could by or make to fix that." She paused for a moment, noting a look from him. "In my homeworld's culture, there's a lot of effort to save face. And if someone is offended, you must apologize. And it's a big deal. Often you better have a gift. And if they don't accept, well you have to take it up a level. In both aspects. The whole idea is that they want you to mean it. And if they don't feel you do, then you're screwed. Or it's very hard anyway."​

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It might well strike him then as to why she was always quick to apologize. And she rarely was thoughtless in anything she did. Especially after all she'd suffered through and beat herself up for. "I don't expect any such grand gestures or apologies. I learned long ago that the rest of the galaxy doesn't work like that. Or even really give a crap. Not saying you don't. But maybe I can impart just a little more understanding for you." It was a small olive branch.

Her expression dropped a little as she thought of home, followed by her ears drooping a little. "I'll never get to apologize to my Gramps. Not the way I want to. I'll never be able to .. maybe, hopefully, see pride shine in his eyes again. And that might be the worse of it all. At least I got to talk to my grandmother again. I know she's happy and proud, she forgave me. But I can't make it up to him."​

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[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
He leaned on the counter and listened, a lot of feelings warring right then. “Lass… Ye know tha' two souls reside in my body. Say I do lose myself for a moment… Ogrimm, would stop me. In a lot of ways we be checking each other. Aye, I got mad, aye I’d happily fight for ye if ye asked me to, but. Ye notice I did not charge away, I be dealing with my feelings.”

He could see where under normal circumstances she might have needed someone to be told this, but he wasn’t normal. “Unless ye give me a yes, I be sitting back munching on something crunchy while ye go and beat down some idiot. Would be a different story if it be mighty toothy and ye agree I fight beside ye, but I be not the type to just treat ye like ye need a rescue. Will I be hot under the collar if I see someone making ye hurt? Aye, but I be also controlling my temper and sitting pretty for ye for when ye be done smooshing them to dust. Ye need to have more faith in us, aye?”

He gave her a wry smile. “Aye, I understand regrets, and working to make it up, did plenty o’ tha’ when I were young, dumb and full of cum, but I be wiser now. I do be struggling with emotions sometimes, ye deal with a man whose wild nature be skin close. Some, they be so past their ancient blood tha’ things be dull, but my kind run hot. I react strongly to another’s pain, ye touched parts of me tha’ protect its own. All I be thinking right then? ‘This lass is good and kind, she be deserving nothing except laughter and light.’ So seeing ye come to me, after so long, telling me ye love me and then ye be sad, sad like other times, oh it touched a nerve. Can ye blame me for wanting to rip apart all the sad so you could smile?”

He looked down at his feet, his stomach in knots. “I be just wanting to give ye smiles lass. Not fear because of the storm tha’ be howling around inside because I be loving ye the way I do.”

 

[Desbre Gensan]

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Tag: Anse Baenshaol

Des nodded, listening and letting him speak. She seemed to settle and the tension and wariness drained away slowly, by degrees but didn't immediately vanish entirely. "I hear you," she said quietly. He could say it all he wanted, but it didn't make it true. Even if he believed it. Some people used to believe the planets they lived on were flat, despite evidence to the contrary, even when space flight was becoming a regular occurrence. No matter how hard they said and believed their world was flat, it wasn't.

Only time would provide the evidence and truth on the matter. But at least his intentions were good, and that went a long way. But even then the road to Hell was paved with them at times.

But the promise to let her fight her own battles until she couldn't or if she asked for help... or if it was something clearly big enough warrant extra help was good. That did help. And sure she liked the idea of protection when she needed it. But she wasn't a damsel in distress, and didn't need saving. most of the time.

And the sentiment was sweet overall. Wanting to make things better, make her smile. It did draw out a small smile, though it was still clouded, but at least there were rays of sunlight peeking through her gloomy countenance.

"Look. I'm still healing on a lot of things. I still have bad days. I have more good days now than I did before. Every day affords some improvement, but it's not going to ever be all rainbows and sunshine all the time. So... you can't make everything better all the time. It's just not feasible or realistic. You're welcome to try, but it's just not gonna happen. Best you can do is do what you can to take care o' me." She gave him a small smile then to take out any sting to her words. She didn't intend for there to be, but reality could be harsh. but she also didn't need him living in a fantasy either. Setting expectations now, early on was important.

 

[Anse Baenshaol]

Desbre Gensan
He looked up at her then, his eyes a more normal aquamarine. He listened to her then gave a pout. “Ye just said ye don’t want taking care of and now ye said I could. Which is it?”

The glimmer of humor in his eyes and the ghost of a smirk on his lips, he was teasing her. He walked over and leaned down, his forehead touching hers as he breathed in then out. “Aye, I’ll take care of ye, I promise. I just won’t get in th’ way either. I’ll earn your trust Desbre, so tha’ ye be sure tha’ even in a temper ye can be fearless. If ye want I can craft a thing tha’ could knock me to th’ floor at a press of a button or a command? There be some frequencies of sound tha’ll do it in seconds.”

He was serious. If she was that worried that he was going to ever raise a hand to her, then he would do whatever he needed to change that. While he was capable of violence, he’d never hit anyone since he was a child. His father had weathered many a storm, but by the time he was six winters he’d learned that hitting was not the answer. His father had told him stories of men or women who had taken to treating the ones they loved like prey. As he grew up he’d seen this himself and swore to himself he’d never do such a thing. The rules that governed his people, or just his clan and then the laws of the land around him.

He didn’t expect Desbre to trust, she didn’t know how he was raised. Didn’t know the kind of man he’d wanted himself to be as he grew older. She wasn’t raised in the peculiar way his people were. Well, he’d never met another of his kind before, so it really only applied to himself really. Still. She could only work with the experiences she had so far and even if she loved him, he still had much to prove.