Feedback on Writing in General.

[Mutton Fist]

I have not yet written much other than my character biography, and perhaps by the time this gets notice I will have started my first roleplay. For now, I wish to know what I could do to improve in my biography rather than make things look fancier through the art of colorful text modifications. It's come to my understanding that I have a very high potential here, and with the help of the community I can achieve a goal that makes me comfortable.

If you'd like to, you may also send me a private message if you'd like to be discrete. I don't mind either way. I hope this will get a few comments to help me get started.

 

[PersonMan]

Well, if you'd want to hear my unprofessional advice.

Maybe work on the following things.
- Expand on your strengths and weaknesses, explain what they mean beyond the word itself. Like, elaborate on why you'd be easily distracted, why you'd be very focused, why you are easy to anger, why you're impervious to taunt (these are just some examples).
- Your name kinda feels like a nickname, not sure if that was what you were going for our not =P
- I don't see anything describing your character's personality, so that might be something you could potentially put some work into.

Again, these are just some points, not sure if they'd be helpful or not =)