Private Erase Myself

[Lief]

The alert had gone out some time ago, pinging through the furthest reaches of the Galaxy made possible by the holonet. A message to one Starlin Rand , encrypted and short. He's awake.​

​

In the days which followed Eliphas' second awakening in the ICU, there had been a lot to take in. Atrophied muscles, the passage of time, and just a general sense of understanding for what had happened. His health had rapidly declined, and despite their best efforts they hadn't been able to figure out the source of his relapse. He'd been left in a medically induced coma for over a year, and any hopes they'd had of him awakening diminished with each passing day. The change which came over him wasn't sudden. It wasn't as though he sat up one day and opened his eyes, or tore the breathing tube from his mouth. Instead it was a steady return, the stabilizing of his vitals, a slow withdrawal.​

​

The morning his eyes opened the message was sent. He was slow to get out of bed in the days which followed, everything felt sore and uncooperative and every attempt he made landed him right back on the ground. Urged by his doctor to stay put until he could begin his physical therapy and strengthen his limbs the proper way. Of course that didn't stop him for too long, and as soon as he could he got his hands on a hover chair. Something of a menace, that's what the nurses had declared him. He was never quite where they needed him to be, taking off as soon as their backs were turned. It didn't matter if they confiscated the chair, he'd find a way to get another.​

​

He wasn't in his room when news of Starlin's arrival reached his doctor, truth be told Eliphas wasn't even aware that he'd been sent for. No, instead he'd made his way through the medical bay and out to the canteen in search of something to keep his understimulated mind busy.​

 

[Starlin Rand]

The message arrived right around Life Day. Perfect timing, since Starlin had accrued enough break time to spend during the holidays. The hyperlane traffic was hell, though, making the trip take at least a couple days longer than it should have.

He avoided telling anyone else, though he knew plenty of other people who would’ve wanted to know Eli was awake. After last time, he couldn’t help but be cautious. Eli had woken up briefly, then slipped back into a coma for over a year. Starlin had torn himself up with guilt afterwards. He’d been too harsh with the boy, he knew. Waking up to find that your family, friends, and entire homeworld had been taken over by the Maw had to have been awful. He didn’t need Starlin taking out his frustration on him.

The ICU was busy when Starlin arrived. Deftly avoiding medical droids, doctors, and hovering stretchers, he made his way to Eli’s room… and found an empty bed, neatly made up.

It was as if the breath was sucked out of Starlin’s lungs. Intellectually he knew Eli was probably just somewhere else in the hospital, but he couldn’t shake the horrible sense of deja vu. He’d had his fair share of nightmares wherein his apprentice withered and wasted away, leaving behind an empty room just like this.

Seizing a passing nurse, he demanded, “Where is Eliphas Dune?”

Startled, the nurse checked her datapad. “He was last seen in the canteen. I wouldn’t worry sir, he can’t have gotten very far—”

Releasing her, Starlin took off running… only to turn around and come back. “Where’s the canteen?”

“That way, sir.”

Starlin took off at a sprint in the direction she indicated, coming to a skidding halt just shy of the canteen entrance. He took a deep breath, dusted himself off, then calmly walked inside.

Lief​

 

[Lief]

"Come on, Dune... Didn't you swipe enough pudding yesterday?" The Codru-Ji crossed all four of his arms at his chest and tried to seem stern and unwavering in his decision, prompting Eliphas to put on his best pout. "Consider it backpay" he tried to suggest, "Think about all the pudding cups I missed out on..." Eliphas looked up with his pleading eyes. "Come oooon, Jak-Rin... Pleaaaase..."​

​

With a huff Jak shook his head, but ultimately slapped three extra pudding cups onto the lads tray. Eliphas beamed in delight, gratitude awash on his face. "You're the best, Jak," he said as he moved on further down the line, "I know" the Codru-Ji chuckled. As he hovered away from the queue to seek out somewhere to sit and eat his prize, he overheard a brief snippet of conversation involving the person behind him in line. "But he got extra!" the voice grumbled.​

​

Whatever Jax said in response was lost to him, and a weird mixture of guilt and victory flowed through him. He found a booth that looked decent and stopped the hover chair beside it, nudging the tray onto the table before hopping down into the cushy seat. The food in general here might have been a little lackluster, but at least they'd gotten the pudding right.​

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Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

Starlin did spot Eli among the patients in the canteen, but part of him was afraid to believe it. So he closed his eyes and reached out with the Force.

An extended illness can alter a human being’s features to the point where they become almost unrecognizable, but it can’t affect their presence in the cosmic web. Starlin felt his apprentice immediately. He was here, all right. That small and fragile looking young man in the hoverchair was really him.

Starlin watched as Eli made his way over to a booth, then worked up the courage to approach him. “Eliphas…” he began, only to trail off, having no idea what to say. Or maybe the words just got caught in his throat.

“That’s a lot of pudding,” he finally said, pointing to Eli’s tray. “Are you going to eat all of that?”

Lief​

 

[Lief]

He sensed a fragile familiarity in the air as he scooted into the booth, but a quick glance over the room didn't reveal much and he was mildly avoidant of using the Force right away. There was so much else to relearn, securing his connection to that metaphysical anomaly didn't seem to be a priority just yet. Perhaps it ought to have been though.​

​

No, it wasn't until he heard the voice that he realized his Master was here. He did jump a little, though he was quick to settle as he turned his gaze up toward him and beamed a smile. "Empress, am I glad to see you..." ​

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Eliphas pushed himself to try and stand, but his wobbly legs didn't much like that idea. He half rose then slumped back into the booth with a small 'I tried' shrug. Then talks turned to the pudding, and a light blush washed over him. "Oh, uh..." Before answering he hastily gestured for Starlin to sit. "It's the only thing I can really stomach" he confessed with a grimace. "Want one..?"​

​

He pushed one of the cups toward Starlin even before he'd finished asking the question.​

​

Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

"Empress, am I glad to see you..."

Starlin beamed in spite of himself, puffing out his chest a little. “Likewise, young Padawan.”

But oh Force, it was hard to see Eli like this, struggling even to stand up. He was still the same sleepy-eyed kid, but so weak and frail…

No. Nope, he wasn’t going to allow this to drag him down. Eli was going to get stronger, he was going to heal and make a full recovery this time. This time.

He took a pudding cup and sat down. Unfortunately for Eli, Starlin was one of those people who squeezes the cup and licks the pudding that spews forth from the top rather than using a spoon like a normal, sane person would.

“Is it because you can’t… digest anything else, or is the food here just that bad?” Starlin asked.

Lief​

 

[Lief]

Starlin was glad to see him too. And he called him Padawan... For as much as had changed in the past year or so, at least that hadn't. At least it didn't seem as though it had. He hoped it hadn't.​

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Watching as the Jedi sat down, Eliphas tore the top off one of his pudding cups and began to eat it like a civilized being with a spoon. When he saw how Starlin tackled it though he almost choked on a mouthful, the laughter snorting through his nose instead. Cheeks turned red as he fought to swallow down the pudding. "Barbarian" he chuckled, all at once seeming to relax mind and body. "I was worried you weren't going to come." He might not have known they'd sent for Starlin but part of him had hoped they would. A larger part feared he was too far gone. That it had been too long, and the man had moved on.​

​

But here he was... At the very least he'd come.​

​

The question left him thoughtful. "I'm not sure, nothing tastes right. Makes my stomach queasy." He licked the spoon, before going for another scoop. "This doesn't though. Just... Don't tell my Doc. If he knew Jax had slipped me more he'd probably get into trouble. Wants me eating regular food." Eliphas pulled a face.​

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Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

“Prissypants.”

"I was worried you weren't going to come."

Starlin’s tongue scooped up another mouthful of pudding before answering in a more serious tone, “Was I not supposed to come see my apprentice?”

He wasn’t hurt by the implications, per se, but he did wish that Eli wouldn’t think like that. Starlin wasn’t in the business of abandoning people, no matter how many times he’d been left behind. He sought to ease the boy’s mind. “You’ve still got plenty more training you’ll need if you’re gonna become a Jedi Knight. No more sleeping on the job, baby.”

Eli revealed that the food made him sick. “Well, if you can’t stomach it, maybe what you need is something other than chitty hospital food for a change. Like… pizza.” It was probably a really bad idea to give someone who had just come out of a coma pizza, but he couldn’t resist. He sighed. “Have they given you an idea of what to expect? In terms of recovery times, I mean?”

Lief​

 

[Lief]

"Prissy..." Eliphas scoffed and gently shook his head, careful not to be too quick in the act. Things were still stiff and jolting around didn't help one bit. ​

​

Starlin's response caused his heart to leap, and the lad peeked up from his spoon to try and snatch his gaze. There was sincerity in his Master's tone, but he needed to see it too... The next words certainly helped to ease him. "You're still able to train me?" he asked with amazement, "They're not going to force me into a corps, or ship me back home?" Oh what a relief that was. "Y-Yes, Master, no more sleeping..."​

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Baby. Boy, Eliphas had never been more glad to hear that said.​

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"Pizza?" He shook his head, unable to keep a small chuckle from rising, "You have a one track mind when it comes to food, you know?" But no, even the thought of pizza turned his stomach. He put down his spoon, planning to finish it soon. ​

​

"No, Sir. Not really... One day at a time, that's what they said." He sounded a little deflated, and slumped back in his seat. "They want me holed up in bed, but I'm tired of resting." Eliphas let out a long sigh, then shrugged as though he didn't really care. "They say I need to relearn how to walk and stuff. Strengthen up my muscles... Does-- does that mean I'm stuck here?"​

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Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

Starlin sighed and nodded his head. “Might as well get it off my chest. While you were asleep, I did look for other Padawans. Not to replace you, no, not at all. But Master Valery Noble has like five of them at once, so why not me, you know?” He needed something to fill up his time, so he wasn’t waiting around pulling his hair out or going off and getting himself chewed up by the meat grinder that was the Alliance war machine.

“None of them worked out. Not a single one. You’re officially my only Padawan. Send you into the AgriCorps? You wish. You’ve got too much potential for that. If anything, they’d just—” Send you home. Oh, wait. Never mind.

The kid didn’t seem all that enthusiastic about pizza. But Starlin’s excitement just to have him back again was palpable, pouring into Eliphas in the Force. “I guess you are stuck here while you recover. Unless…” A wicked grin spread across his face. “We could convince the doctors to let you go, or we could ‘roid you up with that Spell of Strength I taught you. Remember that one? ‘Ashla, grant me the strength of the Rancor…’”

Lief​

 

[Lief]

"You mean I could've had a Paddyfriend?" he asked, with mock disappointment and a pout. "I guess I'll have to be satisfied with just you then, eh?" Eliphas' expression turned a little more serious after his playful poke had been made, and he tilted his head some to the left in consideration. "I'm glad you tried, even if it didn't go anywhere. I hate the thought of you stuck waiting, or worse..." Some people became self-destructive when things were suddenly out of their control.​

​

But Starlin seemed well enough.​

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"Potential?" he echoed bashfully, before Starlin's trailed off words caught up with him, as well as those he himself had only just uttered concerning home; his expression dropped. There were plenty of conflicting thoughts and feelings which roused within him, but he wasn't ready to face any of that yet. So he squashed it down instead and feigned ignorance to it all.​

​

Forced a smile on his face until it felt natural.​

​

"Do you think that would work?" he asked of the spell, "It'd only be temporary, right?" Still temporary stability and strength was better than the zilch he presently had. "Can't you just, I'unno, sign me out or something? Surely there's ways I can rebuild strength without being stuck here?" There were more reasons than that he was being kept here of course, he was still supposed to be monitored and he was receiving most of his nutrients via an IV. Still, he was clearly beyond restless.​

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In that moment he didn't care about all of that.​

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Starlin Rand​

 

[Starlin Rand]

"Yeah, you could've. Although I dunno if some of 'em would've liked you." There was still a slim chance that Eli might gain a Padawan after all. The key word being slim.

"You took to my spells pretty well for a noob that hadn't even been taken in by the Jedi as a baby." He caught the shadow that fell over the boy's face, but didn't remark upon it. Didn't want to ruin what little good mood they had going for them.

"Can't you just, I'unno, sign me out or something? Surely there's ways I can rebuild strength without being stuck here?"

Starlin shuffled in his seat a bit. He hadn’t even considered just signing Eli out. “Right. Sure. Let’s… do that.” He gestured to Eli’s pudding cup. “Are you finished?”

Lief​

 

[Lief]

"Ouch" he winced, settling a hand over his heart, "Am I that unlikeable?" As for his proficiency with spells, Eliphas merely shrugged. "What can I say, I had this great teacher."​

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Starlin let the awkward matter of home lie undisturbed and the boy felt more than grateful as a result. He had to actively resist sighing in relief, and instead reached for his spoon to take another scoop of pudding now that pizza talks were over.​

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Much to his surprise his Master agreed with the notion of simply signing him out. "Do you know where I can get one of these?" he asked, nodding his head in the direction of the hover chair, "You know, for between spellcraft..." The one he'd been riding around in belonged to the medical bay, and they didn't even want him using it now much less taking it.​

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Besides, Eliphas wasn't a thief.​

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When asked if he was done he reached out and took the final pudding cup, slipping it into the pocket of his dressing gown for later. His eyes remained fixed on Starlin's as he did, as though somehow the man wouldn't notice what he'd done. Then he licked off the plastic spoon, and set that in the same pocket. "Uh-huh" he said, with the goods now secured.​

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Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

“Oh no, I didn’t mean—” Starlin facepalmed. “I meant that they were all kind of… hard to get along with. The kinds of people who are only in it for themselves and don’t like other people.” Way to put your foot in your mouth, man.

“All right, enough buttering me up.” His eyebrows rose as the matter of hoverchairs was raised. “Oh, I have one on my ship. In fact, I think I have more than one… You haven’t been aboard the Bright Knight, have you?” Mainly because he had deemed it unnecessary to travel in such a large and luxurious starship when they were running routine missions. But Starlin had brought it along this time, perhaps anticipating that he would be allowed to release Eli into his custody and that the boy would need more care than an ordinary freighter could provide.

Starlin witnessed the entirety of Eliphas’ pudding “theft”. “You’re a little bit wilder than I remember you being, man,” he said with a grin before swallowing the rest of his pudding and standing up. “If you want to say the spell, it’s your call, man. Otherwise, get to hovering along behind me, and let me do the talking to these doctors.”

Lief​

 

[Lief]

In the face of all of Starlin's fumbling, Eliphas tried to hold back his smirk. By the end though he couldn't, and he laughed lightly. "Hey, I'm just messing with you" he said, wincing slightly as the man facepalmed himself. "That sucks though, I'm sorry." The idea of being a selfish Jedi seemed wholly antithetical, and it didn't sit right with the boy even if he had just swindled his way into two extra pudding cups. Three if you count the fact that he wasn't supposed to have any at all.​

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"Nope, never seen it" he said of the larger ship, though he exhaled in relief when informed that there was already a few on hand. "Okay, good... I had visions of the spell wearing off mid-step..."​

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When Starlin grinned and spoke about his wildness Eliphas looked down momentarily nervous that he was getting off on the wrong foot. He spied the empty pudding cup though, and gently prodded it. "Maybe it's all the pudding?" Not likely. "I don't know, I just feel a little... electrified."​

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Did that make sense? Probably not.​

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"Like I have all this energy pent up, and no way to let it out." Of course surviving near-death probably hadn't helped matters either. A brush with one's mortality did wonders in altering people's outlooks and thus personalities. "Does... Does it bother you, Master?" he asked, sheepishly. "I can try to work on it..."​

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Heaving himself into the hover chair, he nodded toward Starlin. "Best I save any spellcasting for once we're out of here, or they may just insist on keeping me to see how I'm suddenly standing..." It had been said as a joke, but when he thought about it afterwards he couldn't help but wonder if that wasn't the truth of it.​

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Either way, soon enough he was following after Starlin as they headed from the canteen and back into the medical bay.​

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Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

"Okay, good... I had visions of the spell wearing off mid-step..."

Starlin couldn’t help but snigger. “‘Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!’”

When Eli asked if it was all right to be, in his words, “electrified”, or if he should change, Starlin looked incredulous. “You kidding? I like you better this way.” Eli had been a bit stiff before, perhaps due to his upbringing, but in the face of their current situation that seemed to have fallen by the wayside. “Uh, I mean… That’s not an insult upon your past self. Don’t feel bad, please.”

Smiling sheepishly, he speedwalked back into the medical bay and waltzed right up to the front desk. “Hi, where do I sign out this patient?” he asked, gesturing to Eli.

“Are you next of kin?” the droid behind the desk asked.

“Mmmmm I am his Jedi Master.” Starlin spread his arms theatrically. “Does that count?”

The droid paused as it pulled up Eliphas’ records. “Patient Dune, Eliphas is not yet fit for discharge. Remaining requirements include six weeks minimum physical therapy under the supervision of a physician, sleep monitoring, neural and psychiatric evaluation…”

Starlin sighed as the droid continued to drone on. This was going to take a while.

Eventually he managed to get the matter squared away, signing off on the paperwork and agreeing to ensure Eliphas followed certain procedures. Finally, he turned to face Eli. “You’re free to leave. Now let’s get the hell out of here before they change their minds...”

He led the way to the hangar, where the Bright Knight awaited.

Lief​

 

[Lief]

Starlin preferred him more carefree and wild. "Yeah?" That was good right? So long as it remained... Who knew what lay in his future, how he'd actually be once recovered and back on his feet. Maybe somewhere in between? "I... I kind of prefer it too" he confessed. As odd as it sounded, he felt... "Alive. I feel alive..." Which he was, of course, but on more than just a physical level.​

​

Maybe all that time stuck in a coma had softened him in more ways than just his muscle tone.​

​

As he zipped up alongside Starlin in the chair, Eliphas remained quiet and let his Master take the lead. The droid lifted off so many prerequisites that he was left feeling rather dizzy. Various therapies, assessments, bloodwork... Yep, he definitely saw no need to poke his head in there. The pudding cup was burning a hole in his pocket, but he reckoned it was best not to open it and eat it in front of the droid trying to keep them from releasing him.​

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Instead he looked up at the ceiling and drummed his fingertips on the chair arms. A long and drawn out yawn was pulled forth from him, and then he closed his eyes and bunkered down for the long wait.​

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He didn't realize he'd begun to drift asleep until Starlin turned and spoke directly to him. Eliphas jumped in surprise, gaze snapping to his Master as he caught up on what was said. Free to go?​

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"Heck yeah!"​

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After turning the hover chair, he followed after Starlin as they made their way toward the hangar bay. He was so excited to leave that he didn't even realize he was technically still in a hospital gown, wrapped in a bathrobe. Nor that he had exactly zero of his things. Come to think of it though, Eliphas hadn't exactly seen any of his belongings since waking up.​

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A fact he hadn't even thought about until that very moment.​

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Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

The Bright Knight was a Consular-class cruiser, almost a hundred and forty feet long and nearly as wide. She served as a mobile base for Starlin, who had outfitted her with various modifications, mainly in the area of armaments and defense.

“That is the Bright Knight,” Starlin said, gesturing to the vessel. “It has a fully automated medbay, so don’t think that just because you’re not in the hospital anymore means you’ll get to slack off.” He had been stunned by how many more medical treatments Eli actually needed. Even if many of the ones the droid had listed off could’ve reasonably been dropped, it was overwhelming to the point where he’d nearly had second thoughts about signing him out.

Turning to look at Eli, he seemed to realize that the kid was barely clothed at around the same time Eli himself did. “Uh, that droid said they’d move your stuff in,” he said. “In the meantime, get your skinny butt aboard and start getting settled in. Maybe put some real clothes on while you’re at it…”

Lief​

 

[Lief]

As they reached the end of the medical bay and approached the hangar Eliphas found the hover chair sputtering to a halt. Evidently it had been programmed not to be taken into the hangar bay, and frankly the lad couldn't blame them. High tech expensive equipment? Yeah that didn't need stealing. Instead he paused and attempted to draw upon both his memory and the Force. How did it go again..?​

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"Ashla, grant me the strength of a Rancor" he began, voice quiet yet firm with resolve, "Show me I can be strong without Anger."​

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Did it work..?​

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He was almost afraid to find out. It took him a few seconds and some deep breaths to feel any physical difference, and there was a slight glower to his skin. So he stood up, clutching the chair, and waited. His knees threatened to wobble, legs threatened to buckle, but somehow he managed to take a small step. Without thinking about it he reached out to Starlin and grasped his arm for support.​

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"She's a beauty" he said of the ship, though he pouted slightly when informed of how extensive the medical bay was. "Can I at least sleep in a real bed?" he asked, "I'm tired of all the wires and the beeping..." Did he have a bed onboard? There had to be some sort of crew space, right? Even if it was just a bunk built into the wall of a hallway.​

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At this point Eliphas would take pretty much anything.​

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Even a medical bed he reluctantly realized. He hadn't realized how exhausting moving around could be until they reached the boarding ramp. "Do you, uh, have anything I can borrow to wear?" he asked as he was hurried up toward the ship. Eliphas wasn't willing to push himself quite that far though, so his ascension was pretty damn sluggish.​

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Starlin Rand ​

 

[Starlin Rand]

Starlin would never be able to get over the sheer hilarity of the Spell of Strength. Don’t get him wrong, it was a very useful spell. But Force… did it have to not only make you feel like you were on copious amounts of steroids, but look like it, too?

Barely suppressing a fit of the giggles, Starlin took Eli’s arms and helped him up the ramp. “Yeah, there’s a nice room with a bed waiting for you. Actually, this old girl has several rooms, so you can have your pick.”

Despite having the hulked-out physique of a bodybuilder, Eli’s movements were sluggish, and Starlin could tell he was quickly getting tired. “I mean, if none of your clothes fit you anymore, I guess you could have some of mine?”

Lief​