panacea
Amani had not slept the night before. Or the night before that. In fact she couldn’t even remember when she last slept at all. The days and nights blurred together. Any hint of rest was terrorized by a nightmare that seemed too real to dream, thrusting her back into consciousness, wondering how much more she could take.
Immersing oneself in the dark was no easy task. Especially not for one who had followed the light as devoutly as she. The weaning process had begun abrupt, and still she struggled between each aspect. Two mutually exclusive addictions, tearing mind, body, and soul in opposite directions. Amani was at times certain she would go insane.
She awoke from another night terror, drenched in a cold sweat, her head feeling as though it was splitting apart. Her body rejected the dark side, as if trying to flush a life-threatening toxin from its system. The result was agony. Amani cried and screamed into her pillow until her voice was broken. Scratched and pulled at her hair until strands of it clumped in her hands. Choked and heaved until her stomach ached with every movement.
It had reached a point that she could not take it any longer.
"I can feel your anger. Your hatred burns. But not bright enough child. Remember this moment. Comprehend the enormity of your failure, your worthlessness. She will die a thousand deaths before the end because of you. Remember me and when your hatred burns true, come find me. If you survive."
She had remembered what he said. She had remembered every last word, syllable, and inflection. Amani would not deny herself this anymore. It was time to face fears. Face herself. Face him.
Her anger acted like a tether, linking the girl to the Sith Lord whether he cared to notice it or not. But she did. And she followed it to Dromund Kaas. Becoming accustomed to life in the Sith Empire made things no easier. Here, and everywhere she went, prying eyes felt as though they watched her every move. Amani had once been an enemy of the Sith. Now she was a traitor to her own kind. That did not mean she had made friends with the former, not in the slightest. Living in a galaxy where everyone treats you with antipathy and scorn left little room for comfort. But her resolve had not faded. She would see to it that her mission be done, or she die trying.
He was closer now. She would find him.
Because she had to.
Immersing oneself in the dark was no easy task. Especially not for one who had followed the light as devoutly as she. The weaning process had begun abrupt, and still she struggled between each aspect. Two mutually exclusive addictions, tearing mind, body, and soul in opposite directions. Amani was at times certain she would go insane.
She awoke from another night terror, drenched in a cold sweat, her head feeling as though it was splitting apart. Her body rejected the dark side, as if trying to flush a life-threatening toxin from its system. The result was agony. Amani cried and screamed into her pillow until her voice was broken. Scratched and pulled at her hair until strands of it clumped in her hands. Choked and heaved until her stomach ached with every movement.
It had reached a point that she could not take it any longer.
"I can feel your anger. Your hatred burns. But not bright enough child. Remember this moment. Comprehend the enormity of your failure, your worthlessness. She will die a thousand deaths before the end because of you. Remember me and when your hatred burns true, come find me. If you survive."
She had remembered what he said. She had remembered every last word, syllable, and inflection. Amani would not deny herself this anymore. It was time to face fears. Face herself. Face him.
Her anger acted like a tether, linking the girl to the Sith Lord whether he cared to notice it or not. But she did. And she followed it to Dromund Kaas. Becoming accustomed to life in the Sith Empire made things no easier. Here, and everywhere she went, prying eyes felt as though they watched her every move. Amani had once been an enemy of the Sith. Now she was a traitor to her own kind. That did not mean she had made friends with the former, not in the slightest. Living in a galaxy where everyone treats you with antipathy and scorn left little room for comfort. But her resolve had not faded. She would see to it that her mission be done, or she die trying.
He was closer now. She would find him.
Because she had to.