Dying of the Light

[Raejar]

5 years ago

Curled into a ball in the corner of his own home Raejar held his head. His body covered in the blood and gore of his mother and father. His hands stained completely red from where he’d rummaged around in their bodies in the name of his mistress. To tell her of what he saw, of what he learned. Yet she’d left him, she’d simply vanished leaving Raejar alone in the home. The house was silent as a mouse, the air was stale and smelled of death. The boy was unbathed, his hair messed, eyes sunken, lips chapped. He didn’t know how long he’d been sitting there but he knew he was lost, and once again alone. His parents never cared for him, now the one who truly did had also left. “Come back…. Please come back.” Raejar whimpered as he rocked back and forth sobbing, yet he had no tears left to shed, his cheeks, however, were dirtied and the path of tears long past were still visible.


“Why did you leave? I thought you loved me? You promised you’d never leave, that I would be great. I did what you asked... So why?” Raejar whimpered to himself knowing that his mistress was gone that she was no longer there and had abandoned him. Had she found another? Had someone else been more viable than him? Why did no one ever stay? Burying his head in his hands Raejar screamed out over the sound of pounding on his door. He could hear the shouts outside, that of a mob. Those who sought out revenge for those they had lost. They knew of what Raejar had done, they had all the proof they needed from the stench of his home. The stench of corpses that hadn’t been preserved. They raged outside, they wished for a boy to die, they cared not of his age, nor did they understand how misled he had been. They did not know of the mistress that Raejar spoke to. The one that told him to commit those deeds and had promised him so many sweet nothings. Of the mistress he loved.

Raejar knew the door would give way soon, but he didn’t have the will to stand. He was broken, alone and lost. Looking to the door from across the kitchen where he hadn’t left Raejar felt the rage, the sense of sadness, and all the other emotions that those outside his home felt. They wanted his blood, they wanted to be rid of the ‘monster’ They considered Raejar to be. He’d always been considered an abomination, now they had a reason to rid themselves of him. With a loudKakoom! That shook the house and sent shrapnel flying inwards Raejar was forced to cover his now bleeding ears. Everything around him swam, he felt the emotions of those outside trying to overtake him. He felt the hammering of footsteps against the hardwood floor as officers and civilians rushed into the home.

Looking up Raejar saw them approaching, his own fear, anger, and misery rose to the surface in a scream. A scream his species had learned to utilize, a scream known to disorient or incapacitate people but it was amplified by all his own emotions and those of everyone else. The scream stretched out encompassing the house, shaking the walls as the high pitched screech tore at the paint of the walls. The windows blew out, those inside began to bleed from their ears collapsing to the ground eyes rolled into the back of their head where they lay unmoving.

Rising to his feet his vision clearing what Raejar saw was a room filled with corpses, he could sense it somehow, the lack of anything coming from them. His heartbeat hammered in his chest, his head ached and he felt drained but he couldn’t stop. He fled his house, nothing to call his own, he just ran.

 

[Keira Priest]

5 years ago, Cartao, Republic space

Rest and relaxation had long since become foreign words in her vocabulary ever since her enlistment in the Republic military, but that was what she and the army had returned to Cartao for: some much needed RnR. Shortly after taking command of the second Grand Army in galactic history her new position had been christened by two successive invasion-scale battles, both of them the staging grounds for just how they would continue to carry out their defense of the democracy they had pledged their lives to. The existence of the clone army had been swathed in secrecy until that point, and even still the public wasn't certain how to feel about the unveiling of another military comprised of identical faces, a handful remembering the betrayal of ages past.

Public opinion, however, was the farthest thing from any of their minds at the moment. All they sought at the moment was peace, and so retreated to their place of origin for the sake of recouping all that they had lost, making preparations for future endeavors, and above all else a moment of quiet contemplation among their brothers and sisters-in-arms. Upon arriving on-planet the first thing most had done was strip from their armor, herself included. It was amazing how weightless one felt after shedding roughly twenty pounds of gear, and each seemed to breathe just a touch easier after having stowed away a portion of their kit. Still, despite their seeming ease with their surroundings, each held about them an uneasiness often attributed to soldiers of any experience, an expectation that something would go awry and a readiness to combat any threat.

Hushed silence quickly grew to commonplace chatter as the men and women of the army talked among themselves as they went about their tasks, and for a long while she moved among them as an advisor and a friend, and most importantly one of their family. After the proper supplies had been requisitioned and everything had been properly accounted for, most busied themselves with finishing the more menial tasks such as checking over personal equipment and caring for their own personal kit. For her own part she sat among the soldiers of the army and conversed with them simply as the individuals they were, their talk straying far from the ongoing war and instead encompassing the more mundane facts of life that they had no time to so much as consider otherwise. This here was their attempt at normalcy, and it was during the span of these talks that it often became evident just how fundamentally childlike these warriors of the Republic were.

It didn't take long for one of the men to come to her in order to report an abnormality, and so she listened as he explained how he and a few other clones had discovered a child who had apparently stowed away on one of their transports and somehow gone unseen until they'd made it to friendly territory. And so she followed after him, eventually reaching the landing pads, the only sign of something out of place being the gathering of clones about an unseen individual outside one of the ships. Speaking quietly, she pushed through the group, "Udesii, vode. Give some space. It's only a child." Begrudgingly they stepped back, and she knelt in front of the unexpected arrival, not making any sudden movements and keeping her hands where they could be seen. "Are you okay?"

[member="Raejar"]

 

[Raejar]

Bare feet slapped against the ground, the sounds of sirens in the distant drew near, the sky dark, lit only with the night's stars. These were the things Raejar noticed as he ran, his feet were raw, blisters on the bottom of them. For hours, he’d been trying to flee, flee what had once been his home and the destruction he’d left in his wake. Looking back the way he had come Raejar couldn’t see any pursuers but still felt as though they were coming. That they were looking. His stomach twisted in knots as he ducked into a dark alley. The horrid smell assaulted Raejar’s nose causing him to choke as he ran through. The sound of feet padding now turned to splashing as he ran through whatever mystery fluids had been left on the ground of the alley.

Exiting the other side of the alley, Raejar was forced to duck back in as a speeder with sirens blaring sped overhead a searchlight scanning the streets below. People still milled about in the city as though nothing had happened, blissfully unaware of what was happening or had happened. Heart hammering in Raejar clung to the wall of the alley his eyes set on the spaceport that was across the way. The child had watched so many holodramas and that’s what all the protagonists did and honestly it’s all Raejar could think of. To hijack a ship and flee the planet. In truth, Raejar didn’t even know how to fly a speeder much less a full-on fighter or possibly freighter he was hoping it would be like the holodrama’s too.

Taking a deep breath Raejar sprinted making a run for the spaceport. What people would see was a small child running far faster than what any regular human could even at their peak. Not that anyone would confuse Raejar for a human. There may have been some who saw him but he’d be moving fast enough for them to have problems to get a good look at his features. It was one of the abilities of his people that allowed Raejar to run that fast but not without consequence. Being bare foot the skin on the bottom of his feet tore free leaving droplets.

Barreling through the front doors of the spaceport Raejar hurdled the entry terminal and the guard that stood at it with a cup of steaming caf. Visibly startled the overweight man jumped back spilling the caf and falling on his bum. By the time he’d look up Raejar was gone, having blended into the crowd.

Pushing his way through Raejar’s eyes were wide, scanning the area frantically, for anything for any ship he could take or anywhere he could hide. What he saw was a freighter with the bay doors down. Making one last dash for it his feet slapping against the ground Raejar dived as the bay doors began to close. Considering the speed, he was running the landing was anything but gentle. The air was knocked out of him, skin on his arm rubbed raw from scraping against the durasteel floor. Groaning Raejar looked up as the hatchway completely closed bathing him in darkness.

The next time Raejar saw the light it was with a man with a squad of Republic troopers at his back. As they entered they looked upon the malnourished child in the cargo bay. Helmets looking to the pilot weapons raised slightly. “Wait I had nothing to do with this! I don’t even know who this kid is!”

One of the soldiers broke away from their squad reaching out for Raejar but the young boy scurried away pressing his back to the wall of the vessel. Arms wrapped around himself Raejar whimpered. It was obvious the wounds on both his feet and arms were infected, but it wasn’t the physical pain that made him cry. He was surrounded by yet more people who sought to harm him, who would lock him away once they realized what the mistress had made him do. Then entered one a woman with dark hair, she pushed her way through the crowds and asked the one thing none of the others had. Raejar wanted to speak but as his mouth opened no sound came out at first. “Hungry… Hurt…” Raejar wanted to say he was sorry that it wasn’t his fault but he couldn’t get them out. He choked on the words his voice harsh from how long he’d gone without water. “I’m sorry.”

[member="Keira Ticon"]

 

[Keira Priest]

There were two sides of her warring with each other in that moment. One was decidedly more maternal, the other being the part of her that was decidedly military and handled all proceedings as such. Turning her head, she looked back at the clones that were still huddled about the scene. "Those of you that weren't with the squad that found the child are dismissed. For those of you that remain, make a call ahead to the medbay. Tell them there's going to be a kid coming in with minor infected wounds, the major concern being malnutrition." When one of the men saluted and took off, she gestured to those that remained. "I said give him some space. Crowding him in full armor with your rifles isn't going to help." And so they stepped back, stowing their weapons.

When again Keira regarded the child she offered a small smile, one gentle and soft around the edges. When she did speak she made it a point to keep her voice quiet and low, not speaking too quickly and still keeping her hands where he could see they were empty, for once doing her best to not be seen as a threat. "It's okay. You don't have anything to be sorry for." And she meant it wholeheartedly. He reminded her far too much of her own children, his innocence to the greater galaxy refreshing, yet it saddened her to see him frightened and in so much pain. This one was far too young to have suffered so much, but all she could do was save him from further torment by taking him under her wing for as long as she needed.

"My name's Keira Ticon. I'm the one in charge around here, and I'm going to keep you safe. Can you tell me your name?" A simple question in theory, but one she expected him to be resistant to. In her eyes they were just strangers, and he had no reason to exactly trust them. Hell, she wouldn't have blamed him if he lashed out at the group, but she was doing her best at the moment to prevent any violence or give her men any reason to be more on edge. "No one here is going to hurt you. You're safe now." Her smile didn't waver, and she remained exactly as she was in the hopes that he would eventually relax and become more amiable to her eventual suggestion that he get medical attention and nourishment.

Speaking softly in Mando'a her words were intended for the clones, and slowly they dispersed, leaving to the barracks where she would converse with them later as to the exact details that led to the arrival of their unexpected companion. "If it's okay with you, I'd like to take you to the medbay where you'll be able to get help. Are you okay with that?" It was paramount to give him complete control of the entire scenario, so that he was able to relax in the fact that nothing would happen without his consent. It was all in his hands how the next few minutes would proceed, and she was there to simply make sure everything went as smoothly as possible.

[member="Raejar"]

 

[Raejar]

Everything not directly said to Raejar was a blur or completely muffled, time seemed to move slower than normal. He felt lost, drained, and just so tired. Every part of his body felt numb as though he had no control over them. The wounds on his arm and feet stung to no end due to the infected wounds, and Raejar’s head felt as though it was ringing due to the lack of food. When Raejar was finally able to look up again what he saw was the soldiers leaving, till there were only four strangers left. One being the woman and the other three being soldiers that had put away their weapons. Visibly calming some Raejar looked back to the dark-haired woman as she said he had nothing to be sorry for. With those words his head bowed low, his shoulders shaking as the tears tried to come but none could. The young boy sobbed but no tears came.

Shaking his head, Raejar knew he had plenty to be sorry for. The mistress had led him astray, he had obeyed her, felt indebted to her, and loved her. He would do anything she commanded, but she still left him. Then there were the others, the ones that had died when they’d come to take him, to punish him for the crimes he’d committed. Raejar looked down at his still bloodstained hands and shirt and back to Keira a sullen look in his eyes. Despite the guilt, Raejar couldn’t bring himself to say what he had done. What he could do was answer her question. Keira was kind, kind in a way no other was. The mistress had been kind but never had she smiled in such a way. Pointing at himself, the boy was able to croak out his name. “Raejar” No sooner had the words left his lips did he begin a haggard coughing unfit for anyone his age. His chest heaved and a sharp pain radiated across it.

“Nowhere safe.” Raejar wheezed out as he laid against the bulkhead, the cool metal against his skin, his vision blurred slightly as he listened to Keira and nodded his head at the mention of getting help. Raejar didn’t know why he trusted her but he wanted someone, anyone to trust. To be able to talk to, and she was nice to him. “Need help.” Raejar mumbled as he tried to use the bulkhead to stand but as he got his footing there was a sharp pain from the sheer amount of blisters and the infected wounds. Mouth opening but sound unable to come out Raejar fell back to the steel floor. Shaking his head Raejar could do nothing on his own.

[member="Keira Ticon"]

 

[Keira Priest]

With slow, gentle movements Keira reached out to help him stand, picking him up and carrying him the way one would a much younger child once it became evident that he wasn't capable of moving on his own. Given his current undernourished state he wasn't too difficult to move, and while that was fortunate in the short-term she hoped to see him on his way to a speedy recovery. "We're going to go see the doctor so you can get patched up. Don't worry, I'll be with you the whole time." That was a promise she wouldn't break, because for reasons she couldn't quite explain she felt a pull towards this child. Perhaps it was just that he was the single beacon of innocence surrounded by so much war, or that he reminded her of her own children. Whatever the reason, she knew she would do anything to help him.

Her steps were even as she carried him to the medbay, and she tried to jostle him as least as possible, not wanting to exacerbate his injuries any further. The halls of their base of operations were pristine, the only traffic being the clones that walked them, or other personnel closely intertwined with the army. A hushed silence encompassed the building where the majority of operations were carried out, but the very air hummed with the energy of soldiers at rest only for a short period, each of them very aware of the fact that they would be required to move out sooner than later. And so, in a way, the peace was a tense one, but it was nothing they weren't used to. This was simply their way of life, and she still had mixed feelings about bringing one so young right into the center of it.

Upon entering the medbay there was already a room reserved, and as carefully as possible she laid Raejar down on the table, staying put as the medical personnel in attendance entered, making good on her promise. There would be no leaving the room or even his side, and she conversed quietly with the doctor as to this matter, insisting that the child was a personal case despite having only met him mere minutes ago. In short order those on staff got to work, beginning to treat his infected wounds. "You're going to be okay, Raejar. I know it hurts, but you're going to be okay." She spoke in a quiet murmur, offering her hand should he choose to take it, an unspoken gesture of her support.

[member="Raejar"]

 

[Raejar]

Eyes barely open Raejar felt arms wrap around him and lift him from the cold durasteel floor. His vision was blurry but it was clear enough for him to see the one who had aided him. It hadn’t been one of the armored soldiers nor some droid… It had been Keira, the woman. She carried him with a tender care the likes of which Raejar had never known. Neither his mother nor father had held him, whether it had been in a hug or to carry him to bed. They had seen Raejar as an abomination, one saw him as a bastard. The other saw him as the thing that had ruined her relationship. It had been a lose-lose situation for Raejar but as Keira carried him he felt a warmth. Not just from her body but from within himself. For once the young boy felt at peace. This was not the cold embrace of his mistress which chilled him to the very core.

Shifting slightly his head resting on Keira’s shoulder Raejar shivered. He wanted this moment to last forever, for time to just come to a stop so he could enjoy it a bit longer. When they entered the medical facility despite the silence that fell over the facility Raejar could still hear those who had lowered their voices to whispers. Many of them whispered of the boy being toted around by Keira as though he was just some stray. Some offered their sympathies about how they felt sorry for the child. Other clones looked at it from the more practical position of that he couldn’t truly remain there. Any day the Sith could come and attack, then the boy would be in far more danger than he already was.

Head lowering slightly Raejar felt himself being lowered to the cold medical table. As the metal touched his skin he shivered. The medical attendants and droids went to work, one aiding Raejar in removing his shirt. His skin which was a milky white seemed impossibly white now, he looked completely unnatural. His skin clung tightly to his bones to the point where Raejar’s ribs were completely visible. So were the ridges of his spine. Upon closer examination, they’d notice his cheeks were hollow. Returning him to the position he was in they began the process of removing the dead and infected skin from the boy. This wasn’t a major surgery so putting him under hadn’t been taken into consideration.

Raejar saw the hand of Keira and just wanting to touch her he took her hand in his own. His grasp was weak but still he did his best to hold on to her hand. “Th-“ He tried to say the words getting caught in his throat. “Thank you, Keira.” Biting his lower lip Raejar felt the burn as the last bit of dead skin was removed from his feet. Next came the burn as the bottom of his feet were sprayed with bacta. Eyes jerking open hand clutching tightly onto Keira’s, she’d realize that even while so weak the boy had an immense physical strength for his age. It certainly wasn’t enough to crush her hand while he was malnourished but it could be compared to a full grown man’s grip squeezing on her hand.

Relaxing as it ended the doctors inserted an IV into Raejar to supply him with the nutrients he’d need due to the lack of food he had taken in. “Are… Are you an angel?” He asked Keira obviously somewhat out of it from the dehydration and hunger. But Raejar felt as though he could see a light coming from Keira.

[member="Keira Ticon"]

 

[Keira Priest]

All she could do in those moments was offer her silent, unwavering support, and that was exactly what Keira did. She didn't flinch as his hand squeezed her own, only gently rubbing her thumb across his pale skin in a gesture that reflected some sort of maternal affection. If this child was dead-set on remaining in her care, she knew this wouldn't be the last time he suffered. He would have to grow stronger, and if experience had taught her anything it was that strength was most often gained through pain. But she would protect him all the same, offering love not unlike that she felt for the clones. It was up to him whether or not he would ultimately choose to accept it, and if he wished to leave once he was fully healed she wouldn't stop him. Until then, Raejar had a place with her here, and that wouldn't change.

A gentle smile turned up the corners of her mouth, and she kept his hand in hers, not letting go until he was ready. At his inquiry she couldn't help but laugh quietly, shaking her head. "No, I'm afraid I'm not. I just believe in doing the right thing." Even if the lines were becoming blurred as of late. He was just a kid, and one of the few people who genuinely deserved all the good she could offer in the galaxy. Reaching out through the ethereal she melded his presence with her own, an action meant as one of solidarity and comparable in some strange, otherworldly way to the action of her taking his hand. It was a way for her to become intrinsically familiar with his presence while he could do the same in return, forming the beginnings of a bond that ran far deeper than most could claim.

"You don't have to thank me. But regardless, you're very welcome, Raejar. You have a home here, if you wish to stay." An offer she had made without thinking, but one that felt inherently right all the same.

[member="Raejar"]

 

[Raejar]

The lights on the ceiling seemed to glow brighter to Raejar as he listened to Keira’s heartbeat from his position on the table, his hearing so acute he could even perceive the slight buzzing noise the lights put off. Focusing on the cool hand that held his Raejar eased himself, letting his body relax slightly, the feeling of a syringe in his arm awkward, but he endeavored to ignore it. “Thank you Keira.” Raejar mumbled out. “Thank you for being here.” Welling up in the boys eyes were tears, and despite his attempts to blink them away the thin streams of liquid began to cascade down his cheeks.

Licking at his lips Raejar thought at how he had nobody else, his parents were gone, his home in ruins, there was nowhere else for him to go in a galaxy that would judge, despise and potentially try to swallow him whole. Yet just in these few moments he wanted to enjoy the peace, bask in the knowledge that there was at least one person who cared for him, who was willing to help without knowing his past, not judging him for his appearance… Just understanding. “I… Don’t know, seem like an angel to me… When all I know are demons.”

Choking on his words Raejar leaned over trying to pull Keira closer to him so he could embrace her, he just wanted to feel it one last time. A loving embrace. “My mother.. She never hugged me. My father never loved me. I have nowhere to go, no family.”

“I want to stay Keira, I don’t want to go. Please don’t make me.” Clutching at her shirt with his hand unwilling to let go Raejar looked up into the woman’s eyes with his own orange and gold ones. “I can’t go back…”

[member="Keira Ticon"]

 

[Keira Priest]

Her right hand gently brushed away his tears even as they fell, the calloused touch gentle. "I'm always going to be here." There were only so many things Keira felt she could be sure of lately, and for some reason this promise to one she had only just meant fit in with the rest of those certainties. Very rarely did she ever keep others so close to her heart, and in just a few minutes he'd managed to get close to her in a way that took most people years to build up trust in order to achieve. Never had she been one to hold any sort of belief in fate, but she couldn't deny that this sequence of events was just as damning as any sort of destiny had the capability to be. If the galaxy was trying to tell her something it had a funny way of going about it, though she wouldn't question its wishes for once. There was an innocent life in the balance, and that was all that mattered.

When he pulled her into a hug she returned the gesture, holding him close and rubbing his back, releasing him only when he did so first. Dark eyes looking into brightly pigmented orange irises, her gaze unwavering. "No one is going to make you do anything anymore, because I won't let them. If you want to stay here, then that's what will happen." He needed to feel in control again, and she wanted to give him that ability in small increments so as not to overwhelm him. However, in the present moment what was most important was that he knew he was safe and had a home with her, no matter where that may be. "You don't have to go back. This will be your home now. You have that here, with me." Had she been like this once, just a child, lost and afraid with nowhere to go? It seemed impossibly long ago, but having him here with her reminded her of a time when she had been no different than himself.

Her only hope was that he wouldn't end up like her, and she would do all she could to prevent that. "There isn't anything more to be afraid of, I promise. Everyone here is going to protect you." With one hand she brushed a lock of onyx hair from his face, easing him down so that he might lay comfortably again. "What's important now is that you get your rest. You've had a long day, and you need to heal. Don't worry, I'll be by your side the whole time, and I'll be here when you wake up."

[member="Raejar"]