Down the blood red road (completed)

[Arabella Darkhold]

They had encountered one another and gotten no where. He didn't understand, and she was still trying to deal with guilt. All of her sith training kept her from falling to far into despair there was no more random killings just to watch someone else's life end. No now she went with purpose, went with the ideas that she needed.

But her mind was clouded and until she could rid herself of the guilt she would not be able to move forward in her training, and if they could not decide who and what they were to one another she would lose part of her soul. That little soul that her father made sure she had, and then there was her father to deal with. He was secretive at times lately, which meant something was in the works.

But that was another story, this one has to deal with her and Muadie, and their adventures. They needed to find their way back to one another, or call it done and move on.

What would he say if he knew why she acted the way she did.


[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

Death. War. Killing. Pillaging. Destruction. Chaos. Yes, chaos especially. These were things he knew and reveled in. Things he excelled at. Things he was master of. Yes, he was a killer. A monster. It was who he was. What he was. But there was a part of him that was different. Foreign. Incompatible. His heart longed for someone altering who he was.

Once he was an agent of chaos with no worries and no cares. Then he had begun to form attachments. Friends, both allies and enemies, whom he considered as part of his life. And then there was the other. The one he knew and loved. The only he felt this for. Arabella. She was different. Oh she was an agent of chaos as he was, but there was something between them from that first moment they met in the ruins of a sith temple.

Love, such a wretched creature. Love, such an inspiring emotion. The duality of love. To accept it, to act upon it. Long had he struggled against it and denied it. But in the end he had chosen love .... and Arabella. But time had separated them. Separate missions. and for nigh a year neither knew where the other was. Until he had found her in a bar.

A night of fighting, drunken arguments, and in the end unanswerable questions that had hung unasked between them. Were they still Belly and Muadie? Or were they merely two sith knights to one another now? Unmuttered questions now have risen to the forefront. Undeniable. An unquenchable desire for where they stood one another.

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

[SIZE=12pt]The wind whistled through the trees Arabella cobalt blue eyes stared as the leaves floated down lightly touching the ground. She once felt that free that, she swallowed hard.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]She longed for him to hear the maniacle laugh, the burning of his blue eyes. The mad Sith if only they knew in truth that the madness stopped in the depths of the darkness that only she could find in him. That place that whispered of his goals, of his life, and all that he wanted to be.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]Arabella paused she looked at the drink on the table, this was not helping anything. She only drank to calm the bond to make it blind to her emotions to her needs, and guilt.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=12pt]He hadn’t turned to Leylah he told her as much. So then there was a hope perhaps. She thought hard about what to do. Her father would say many things to her about wisdom, love, desire, Arabella laughed she loved her father he told her about the twisting of the beliefs over the centuries. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]But this was different, this was her and her behavior how she acted brought this on.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt]For a moment at her weakest she let her guard down and the bond glowed bright it was till there after all this time it was there. Muadie[/SIZE]

[SIZE=12pt][member="Muad Dib"][/SIZE]

 

[Muad Dib]

The building towered over all others in the vicinity. Strong winds flapped the flags standing at salute above the roof perched upon their poles. Dark skies and pregnant clouds gave the promise of rain and like the contractions in the womb, so to did the skies contract with flashes of lightning that with each quickened flash timed the nearing arrival of the storm.

On the ledge, like an ancient gargoyle, perched a man in brown. Dark pants, tunic, and leather jacket adorned the body, whisking about in the wind along with the touseled brown hair. Glowing blue eyes roamed the city below flickering from block to block and yet not another muscle stirred. He was looking, vainly, for Arabella who he had met in a bar on a night not much different then what this evening was promising to be.

He knew she was still in the city, he could feel that much, but he could not seem able to pinpoint her. So he waited. And he watched. A bolt of lightning struck some miles from the city illuminating the ground. And with the bolt came an awakening in the bond forged by the force and their feelings for one another. She had stopped shutting him out. His Bella was calling.

Leaving the roof he caught the turbolift down to the ground level. During the ride he latched onto the feelings, memories, his girl that drifted down the bond unbidden. The doors opened and he made his way along the empty streets to the glow that was beckoning him. Pausing by some trees he paused and crouched lifting a fallen leave and reliving a thought, an internal utterance, that was not his own.

She is close

A few doors down was a quiet pub and mere feet from the entrance the heavens opened up. Stepping into the pub his glowing eyes found her sitting at one of the tables near the window. His breath caught at the sight of her that he had been starved for. Barely able to peel his eyes from her he scanned the room and found only four other patrons. A couple in a booth, an old man at the bar, and another man on the far side of the room nursing a drink. Returning his thirsting gaze once more upon her he walked over and pulled out the chair opposite her and sat, resting his hands on the table before him clasped as if he was afraid he would grab her without that small anchor.

Burning eyes memorized every detail of her face, drinking in the features he knew as well as his own, possibly better. Furrowed brow as he leaned back slightly so as not to crowd her.

"Hey darlin'."

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

Arabella kept the bond open she knew he was here, she knew him all too well. Once he had found her he would not just leave no matter how mad he was at her, or disgusted by her behavior. And secretly she felt he already knew why she acted the way she did. If he didn't it would come out.

It did not take long for him to walk through the doors. Only when he approached and she actually heard his voice again did she look up from staring at the stains on the table to look into his eyes. She felt her spirit, her soul, within her leap with joy as she wondered if he felt her guilt over the assassin.

"Hey Maudie" She half smiled, "Do you want to sit, or shall we walk?" She would leave it to him. Now with her mind cleared she looked him over.

He looked a little worn, had he been looking? She knew the answer to that. She took a breath and looked to be in sync with him once more. Had too much time passed for them? She had so much to tell him, and yet all of it paled in comparison to where they stood with each other.

You look tired Maudie She thought to herself, so in tune had they been at one time that he read her thoughts. Could he still?

[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

His eyes traced the curve of her lips as she smiled. Reaching out his fingers, coarse and callused, paused just short of her soft lips. Then he brushed her hair back behind her ear before pulling back. He clenched his hand steeling himself from an urge that he easily identified especially as their bond rushed back to him fully open.

He blinked for a moment, exhaustion making his bones ache. A brief pull on the force refreshed him. Focusing his glowing blue orbs on her own blue ones he held out a hand and bent slightly as a shadow of a grin flickered on his face.

"A walk perhaps then."

He felt the echo of her thoughts mingling with in himself. His smile was true now and not just a shadow.

"I'll rest when I'm dead. And I don't need to know what your thinking to know what your thinking. The slight wrinkle in your brow from worry. The narrowing of your eyes speak of deep thoughts. That scent coming off you right now ... Hmmm ... I remember that smell."

His smile turned to a grin.

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

Arabella reached over and took his hand. Her fingers curled around his then as she stood her fingers slipped between his. They were connected. She looked at his hand with hers. It was welcoming.

"A walk then Maudie" she steered him toward the door, back the way he came. Questions. She had a few. But. This was his time. She smiled genuine at him. Her smell. He had bathed in it marked her as his. She had claimed him there was no one else. Arabella could feel longing.

"So Maudie. What questions do you have? " She looked at him. It had been too long she had missed his closeness. She reached over and touched his shirt "you need a new shirt" or nothing. She felt her reserve faltering. She wanted him closer.

[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

Her hand in his almost felt like heaven. If he believed in that sort of thing, which he didn't. But one thing was sure, Arabella made him feel more then the Mad Knight of the Sith. He was more when he was with her. He didn't think it was possible, but here they were, together again. And it felt good.

Walking out the door he smiled as the wind picked up tossing the rain falling from the sky as if a storm deity had come to visit the city. Glancing over to her he looked for the words that seemed to spring from within like a bubbling brook. But it had dried up. A wink at her at the shirt comment as he shrugged a bit feeling the worn tunic.

Then he stopped and stood in front of her rain running down the collar of his frayed shirt. His free hand lifted to her chin tipping it slightly as he looked down into her face.

"Where were you? Where have you been? Does it matter? I don't think I care."

Lightning flashed illuminating the sidewalk in an errie blue light. He chuckled lightly. Reminded him a bit of force lightning.

"Did you find yourself? Your roots as a mando? Are you sith? Do you know anymore?"

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

She gave him a little smile of discomfort. The weather around them replicated the emotions within them crashing, blowing and building to the apex. Arabella did not reach to remove his hand to handle each question she breathed softly all while she looked up into his eyes.

"Where was I?" there was no lieing to him she could not do it, "Finding out where I am asking my father the questions that I longed to know" Maudie knew how she struggled not knowing who her mother was made her feel half complete as if half of her had no identity.

"Where have I been, on Artrisia with my father mostly least when he is there and when he feels like he wants company" She whispered to him another painful spot her father such a conglomeration of emotions it was hard to know him. He at times would push them away as if it was a reminder of something, something either he wasn't suppose to have, or need, or was it want.

"Does it matter, oh Muadie, it matters to me even if it does not to you" she shook her head slightly. It was beginning to feel more familiar with him, emotions within her were beginning to rise. She saw him laugh he always liked the turbulent crashing of weather.

"I am myself I am my father says many have forgotten it is the person who is evil not the force. The person and how they use the force. At times we can be good, and other times we an be the devil. I do not think that is a Sith, it is something else now. I did not get far with my mandalorian culture training my mind was not on it" She lifted her foot and put it lightly on top of his boot. "I was and still do suffer bouts of guilt Muadie, I could not choose, and it cost us all" He would know exactly what it was, but she did not know how he would feel about it.

She waited now for all of this to give him time to consider, think. So much she had been so sure of only to manage to destroy on her own.

[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

Listening to her speak, not just with his ears but through the bond they shared, he felt the turmoil that haunted her. Decisions made. Wages lost. Outcomes made manifest. And yet no true resolution of the search. The longing to understand. He knew her distraught for he had felt it within his own breast where one would assume a heart rested, perhaps if they knew him not.

Leaning down he lightly pressed his forehead against her and closed his eyes relishing the moment, the closeness. Stepping closer he wrapped his free arm around her back and pulled her gently into his embrace. Nearly whispering he spoke.

"The mission I went on, the one where I disappeared, was given me by some of our old masters. More of the same. Go to a certain planet. Cause turmoil. Grow resentment for the government and the inability for the Jedi stationed in that sector to quell the disturbances. Raise a revolution. Overthrow the government, the law, and create anarchy. And kill Jedi. A mission I am made for: Chaos."

He paused for a moment as he watched the rain drip off her nose, raising his lips to brush them away, then once more rested his head with hers.

"But what is the purpose? Our masters claimed we were eradicating the Jedi and the republic to instill a rule of peace and prosperity. But built on the innocents we destroy. I learned what I always knew to be true, we Sith are evil. I am evil. I am a monster. There on the planet with sith troopers there for reinforcements I watched their brutality, not for a reason, but for brutality's sake. They are monsters. As am I."

"I was a monster long before I became a sith. A killed my parents as a babe, through uncontrollable abilities. As a child I fed on the weak and eliminated them. I killed those strong because they lauded their own strength over me. As a youth I trained myself through teachers to be a killer, an undestructable thing that would never be preyed upon again. Then I was betrayed by jedi and allowed to be tortured and broken, beaten, to be turned into a weapon. And I hated them for dong it to me. But I thrived on it. I escaped and slaughtered my teachers and my captors. Then I wrecked havoc. Why? Because I could."

He watched her as he opened himself up to the bond and allowed her to feel what he felt. The anger, pain, and hate that welled within.

"I joined the sith so I could have an easy avenue to strike at the jedi and kill. And kill. And kill. I bowed to no man, no jedi, no witch, no sith. I wanted knowledge and power so I could destroy the jedi. There was no line I would cross for my vengeance. But then there were those select few I called allies. No. I called friends. You were there at the beginning. I was a madman that nothing could tame."

He sighed.

"Our order rotted as a corpse. And I along with it. I grew darker my carefree madness tempered by the blood on my hands, And my desire for more. I speak frankly now. You. It was you. You began to change me. And then I allowed myself to love, for the first time in my wretched existence. On that mission I was on, I watched troopers begin to kill children on the streets. And I allowed it. I watched. I watched. And for only the second time in my life I made a choice that was against all I had become. I killed the troopers and saved those remaining children. Not because I am the 'good guy', but because in their frightened faces I saw the innocence that I still see in you."

He leaned in lips brushing her cheek.

"I am not a good man, I never will be. I am a monster by birth, through my surrounding and upbringing, by my actions, by my choice. But I will no longer be used. I am my own man, I am my own monster."

"I have heard your words and they have resonated within me these past months.We are more then the sum of our parts. More the our parents. More then those that sculpted us. More then those that used us. We have free will. We can choose to be the masters of our own fates. I am something else now too. We have paid for our sins. Now we are free to move forward and become whatever we desire."

"I have paused in my choices, and it cost me dearly. Cost me a love I wanted before it came to fruition. Cost me a brother. Cost me you. I will not allow my inability to choose cost me again. My first choice, the other I mentioned earlier, was loving you. It was my greatest mistake. And one I would make everyday of my life. You will never be free of my love, nor I of yours. Though it may cost me everything, it is a price I will gladly pay for all the eons of time."

"I am a monster. But I will choose my own actions. I will not be dictated by others. This monster, changed though h may be, is still your to command. Because I love you. And though the brightest suns may go supernova and become blackholes my love for you will never diminish."

He stopped now, not sure what more to say. She always had a way of making him speak and feel more then what he was. From the first time when he held the skull and made it speak as a puppet, to fighting side by side, to the lonely sands of Tatooine, that were never lonely when he was with her ... she mad him feel.

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

All the words spilled out his emotions tore into her it nearly took her breath away as they each crashed onto her. She looked up his forehead on her she leaned a little closer her arms circling around his neck his breath was her breath, his heart beating matched her heart beating they were once again in sync with one another. From the depths of the darkness they each broke free to find the other in the dark.

"Oh Muadie" she whispered remembering the day they met, the travels, their missions, the fair so many things happened between them. She could feel hints of contentment and she was proud of him of what he had done. Making a choice not to be a puppet but to define himself, and choose where and when he would go, and what he would do to accomplish his goals.

Oh a million different things did not matter right now. "Muadie my hero, my savior, my friend, and my lover." What words could she say, would words ever be enough, "When I am lost you find me, when I hurt you comfort me, when the darkness surrounds me you are there with me. You are my mad knight, and I will never let you go again." She had learned a lesson that to live without him was more dangerous than living with him.

Her right hand reached up and laid gently on his cheek, "you are my monster, always and forever." She stayed close feeling the warmth of the fire that burned within him. "Muadie I love you and only you" She buried her face into his chest letting the storm rage around them within herself her own storms calmed as she reached through the bond they shared to find him and bind him to her.

Muadie She called to him, I want to go home with you..

[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

He smiled, truly smiled, as h held heard and felt her words move his heart like none other could. In her embrace everything was right. Feeling his bond resonate with their union he knew that no matter what was to happen, together anything was possible. The words echoing down the bond caused him to chuckle deep in his chest.

"You are my home Bella. I have no where else. I need no where else."

As his own words warmed him with the truth it also spoke a concept that shook him just a bit. He was homeless without the sith. He had long ago ceased to think of Adumar as home, if he ever did. Even though they were together once more together again, he was homeless. t never mattered before but now, with his love in his arms, it reminded him that though his abilities were impressive and his experience was vast he had never garnered wealth for himself. He had his lambda class shuttle and his possessions on his body and his ship but nothing more. No home and no hearth.

A wry smile turned his lips into a rueful grin.

How bout I go home with you Belly?

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

She smiled, "I can't take you home Muadie, where my father and I live is a mandalorian world, and Sith are not welcome there. My father and I are not sith anymore we are more now, different." She stepped back, "So I guess we'll have to go somewhere else or stay here somewhere and talk about all the thing I've been learning, and you what you've been doing"

Outside in the rain, drenched to the skin nothing like a little chaos in their lives to keep them motivated, "I guess we walk some" And leave the reunion of other types for later, "maybe some food if you are hungry" She leaned on him not caring about being wet. She let the force touch them, and pull them closer." She waited for him to say he what he wanted to move them down the walk, or stand here and continue to revel in each other's presence.

[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

Grinning he shrugged.

"A walk then. So regale me of what you have been learning. And tell me of what you have become now that you are ... no more sith."

Holding her tight he felt the force running between them as he felt her heart beat against his body. The rain fell in torrents of small rivers as if nature were attempting to wash something away. Perhaps something that is already gone from our souls ... His glowing blue eyes watched the empty streets as people fled from the storm as any sane individual would.

Perhaps that spoke more to just who the two of them really were. A grin split his face again as the limbs of windswept tree scattered the pattern of the rain falling upon them from above.

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

She could not say too much about what she was learning, well, "I am learning that there is always a choice Muadie. We can choose to be evil, or choose to be good. We do not need to be one or the other. That is what changed, so I don't bare the title of Sith, just Knight." She smiled and held his hand within hers, they were connected again. Life held its meaning again to her.

The storm raged and they played under its cloud covered skies. The rain beat upon them and they laughed at its attempt. This was what they had waited for to be together to face it all and then.

"Muadie I finally found out who my mother is, and...its hard to believe I think my father has some kind of feelings for her. I just don't know what kind. It's odd." The wind whipped around them encasing them in its eye protecting them for a brief moment giving them a singe reprieve only to suddenly drop and expose them again.

"What do you want to do Muadie?"

[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

"I have a few ideas."

His grin spread as he twirled her around in his arms before setting her on her feet again. The rain was now whipping into their bodies from the other direction as the storm's eye had just passed. It was different here with her. And yet the same. They were both changed thanks to their individual paths during their separation. But the thing that had not changed was the one word that sith were not supposed to speak let alone feel. Love. Maybe that's where their metamorphosis truly began.

"Your mother? I know that not knowing has haunted you. Do you get to meet her? As for Garith, I learned he is a bit of a complex man. You never can tell who he is going to care for or hate with indiscriminate passion. I should perhaps see the 'old man' again."

He smiled again, the secret smile that was open, the one he only shared with her. His brow was slightly furrowed as he considered her words.

"I need to do something. Now that I have found you and we seem to be just as close as ever, I need to do something. I still have my chaotic urges you know. As well as other urges that desire to be satiated. Might do some travelling see if there is a cause that could use someone with my expertise for destruction."

Chuckling in his chest he kept an arm around her waist.

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

"Hmm the "old man" might like to see you it will depend on his mood" Arabella twirled out and then back into his arms, much like their relationship spinning turning and then them bumping together. She laughed,

Yes they did seem to have fallen right back where they had left off, "Some cause, what kind of cause Muadie?" She imagined all kinds but she wanted to hear him talk it had been so long since she had heard him ramble and babble, and she missed him. Her aching for him, the loneliness she couldn't help it it seeped into the bond. As she looked up at him, as he moved her in the pouring rain, while lightning raged.

[member="Muad Dib"]

 

[Muad Dib]

Looking into her eyes he grinned as the storm raged round about. Here however, with her, he found the calm of the storm. He could be the raging inferno and yet still find his serenity. Arabella was his peace in the mid of turmoil. Leaning down he pressed his lips to hers, relishing in the taste every time. Reluctantly pulling away he looked into the sky as he gathered his thoughts.

"I'm a man of action, of chaos. It is who I am. It's what I do. But, even though I have found a kind of morality, I will never be a jedi. I will hate them til my dying breath. The institution is corrupt while preaching it's merits. I have had the occasional jedi comrade but as a whole I'd sooner kill them as look at them."

Walking with her they neared a tarp that covered a small deli patio. Near a table he pulled out a chair for her to have a seat before pulling a second chair near and sitting himself. Leaning forward he kept one hand entwined in hers.

"But on the flip side there is the sith. They rot from the inside. They are not true agents of Chaos, but pretenders. I feel if I was to walk that path again I would become something other then what I am now. And I don't know if I, who I am now, would survive that transformation in any incarnation it takes. I want something else. But I will still be the monster."

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]

 

[Arabella Darkhold]

[member="Muad Dib"]

"Man of action, man of unmentionable appetites, and even stranger clothing" She smiled at him, "I do not see you as a Jedi Maudie not ever the fires of Mustafar would have to turn into the ice of Hoth before I'd believe it"

She slid into the chair effortlessly all while holding his hand keeping him attached as if letting go would lose him forever. She listened now to his words the few times that they were able to talk about what they each wanted. How they wanted it, when they wanted it. For a long time she knew he had been contemplating leaving the Sith to do what she had never known, she had felt the same. She had found a path with her father. Muadie must have his own path, he could go anywhere but she prayed it was not someplace that she could not follow.

"Maudie" she leaned closer now to him gazing into those brilliant blue eyes. She sighed she felt a contentment that was not there earlier. "So long as you are my monster, so long as you only go where I can follow, in this whatever you do, I am here for you to do so" There may not be anymore sith temples for them to find, or adventures in building empires but perhaps this new path would lead to something better, bigger for them both.

 

[Muad Dib]

As he listened to her words he finally realized something. He knew it already but to have it confirmed once more only cemented his ideas. She was what he wanted, and as long as they were together anything was possible. Because they were together. And facing the past as he had done in recent months he knew that alone they were powerful, smart, forces to reckon with. But together anything was possible.

He leaned forward his eyes still feasting on her beauty.

"Where you go, so too will I follow. Even to the gates of hell. And where ever I go, you will be welcome and, more importantly, needed. Because I need you Bella. You are the other half of my soul. Or the majority of it."

He grinned at his humor. He often didn't think he had a soul and that Arabella was so special that she had the soul for many. He figured that made them even more compatible. A flash of a thought glimmered in his glowing eyes, the only warning she had, before he kissed her hard, feeling the emotions that once he was afraid to share but now was willing to embrace.

[member="Arabella Darkhold"]