Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos
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Connect The Dots (Jedi)
- Thread starter Anastasia Rade
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Ben Watts
I Am No One
[member="Lira Dajenn"]
Ben Watts waved his hands at the lot as they said their goodbyes and made their exit. He scratched his nose and made his way over to the terminal that had been shot and began to inspect it, wondering what possessed the little slicer to shoot the door, he should have known better. He ran his hand across the terminal and let out a sigh, Kiskla would not be pleased, but then again she had better things to worry about so he would repair it himself. His thoughts were jumbled as he stared at it, not knowing anything about how to fix the darn thing, when the voice of the Padawan broke his concentration.
Standing up straight, he turned to face the girl, and she asked to speak with him about the Order. "Ask away," He said with a smile, wondering what information she was seeking from him. She must have known his history or else she would probably not have said anything. The Jedi had the wrong idea about him sometimes, like he was some sort of savior, when in fact he was merely a man who had survived more than his fair share of close calls. "Though I may not be as informed as some would lead you to believe." It was partially true, he was a little rusty on the current dealings with the Jedi, but he knew quite a bit about the Jedi of Old.
Ben Watts waved his hands at the lot as they said their goodbyes and made their exit. He scratched his nose and made his way over to the terminal that had been shot and began to inspect it, wondering what possessed the little slicer to shoot the door, he should have known better. He ran his hand across the terminal and let out a sigh, Kiskla would not be pleased, but then again she had better things to worry about so he would repair it himself. His thoughts were jumbled as he stared at it, not knowing anything about how to fix the darn thing, when the voice of the Padawan broke his concentration.
Standing up straight, he turned to face the girl, and she asked to speak with him about the Order. "Ask away," He said with a smile, wondering what information she was seeking from him. She must have known his history or else she would probably not have said anything. The Jedi had the wrong idea about him sometimes, like he was some sort of savior, when in fact he was merely a man who had survived more than his fair share of close calls. "Though I may not be as informed as some would lead you to believe." It was partially true, he was a little rusty on the current dealings with the Jedi, but he knew quite a bit about the Jedi of Old.
[member="Ben Watts"]
She paused for a moment, thinking about what questions she could actually ask him. He was one of the founders of the Order, one of the two Jedi that had stood against evil and united them when the Sith resurfaced in the outer rim. Of course when that had happened she had been blissfully unaware of the events, but now it all seemed rather important.
“When you and Master Teferi founded the Order...Did you know?” For a moment she stopped, then elaborated. “Did you know how quickly the Order would change and evolve? How quickly Grandmasters would rise and fall and how splits would occur?”
She of course referenced the Silver Jedi and the Levantines splitting off from the main Order.
It was of course a rather difficult question to answer, but the Padawan was genuinely curious, and it was only the first of many. When Ben had answered the first question, she continued on, this item stammering slightly and sounding more sheepish. “I'm unsure of my path, Master Watts. The Knights who rescued me...Avalore and Hal. They have such different beliefs. Hal is stalwart and stringent to the code, Avalore is Kind, but she is...looser with how she follows the Code. So much of the code makes no sense to me. Abandoning emotion, giving up passion...i don't understand. Passion is what drives us, it is what pushes us forward as a whole and lets us achieve greatness...and emotion...my feelings for my friends, the need to reclaim my homeworld and protect my people...the love I feel for my parents, its the only reason I became a Jedi. Why would I give that up?”
Clearly, this young padawan didn't quite understand the Jedi Code, or perhaps she just didn't believe in it.
She paused for a moment, thinking about what questions she could actually ask him. He was one of the founders of the Order, one of the two Jedi that had stood against evil and united them when the Sith resurfaced in the outer rim. Of course when that had happened she had been blissfully unaware of the events, but now it all seemed rather important.
“When you and Master Teferi founded the Order...Did you know?” For a moment she stopped, then elaborated. “Did you know how quickly the Order would change and evolve? How quickly Grandmasters would rise and fall and how splits would occur?”
She of course referenced the Silver Jedi and the Levantines splitting off from the main Order.
It was of course a rather difficult question to answer, but the Padawan was genuinely curious, and it was only the first of many. When Ben had answered the first question, she continued on, this item stammering slightly and sounding more sheepish. “I'm unsure of my path, Master Watts. The Knights who rescued me...Avalore and Hal. They have such different beliefs. Hal is stalwart and stringent to the code, Avalore is Kind, but she is...looser with how she follows the Code. So much of the code makes no sense to me. Abandoning emotion, giving up passion...i don't understand. Passion is what drives us, it is what pushes us forward as a whole and lets us achieve greatness...and emotion...my feelings for my friends, the need to reclaim my homeworld and protect my people...the love I feel for my parents, its the only reason I became a Jedi. Why would I give that up?”
Clearly, this young padawan didn't quite understand the Jedi Code, or perhaps she just didn't believe in it.
Ben Watts
I Am No One
[member="Lira Dajenn"]
He listened intently to the girl as she spoke, know where she was coming from, having felt the exact same emotions she was feeling now. Being a Jedi was no easy task and lately he believed that it was harder to do than ever before. The Republic and the Jedi were in turmoil, the Sith were stronger than ever, and with so many people standing up for what they believed was the right thing to do it was almost impossible to pick a side. Was this how he saw things panning out? No, not at all, but he also knew that his vision of the future would never come true. It was a wishful fairy tale.
"When Teferi and I founded the Jedi Order all those years ago, we had no idea what the future held. The only thing that we knew was the the Galaxy that we loved, that we wanted to protect, was much bigger than us. We spent months hunting for anyone with even the slightest bit of talent to be trained because we knew that we would need more than the two of us to do what needed to be done. It was not like in the past where the Jedi could be picky, they would only train Jedi from birth, we had to recruit anyone who could wield a lightsaber no matter how reckless it was." He paused and reminisced about those days. Just the two Jedi Masters going planet to planet recruiting anyone and everyone. He was gone now, and Ben missed him greatly, but he knew there was no point in mourning.
"In a way, we knew. We knew that we were being careless with who we let in, but you must understand, we were weak and needed people who were willing to rebuild the galaxy, to make the Jedi whole again. The thing is, being a Jedi is more than carrying a lightsaber and calling yourself a peacekeeper, it is a lifelong decision chalked full of difficult decisions. There was a reason the Jedi Order of old only recruited people from birth, they had to drill in the ideals of the Jedi Order, they had to mold a young generation into the Jedi of the future. This life that you and I have chosen, it is not a life of luxury, and the other path... the path to the darkside.... it is much easier. It would be foolish to believe that bringing in people who had already developed beliefs, lived lives so much differently than Jedi, to continue down this path that is so unforgiving. We are hated by some, coveted by others, and misunderstood by most everyone besides those who train next to you in the temples." Was he ranting? Sure seemed like it, was he even answering her questions?
"Being a Jedi is not about adhering to some strict code that was created long before we were alive. It is about using the gift that you were given for the greater good. It is about standing up for what is right when no one else will, sacrificing comfort and safety so that someone else who is not as fortunate as you can just... survive another day. While passion and emotion most certainly can lead to the darkside, it is important, but even more important than that is realizing when it is too much. My father was a Jedi before me, and for years I wanted nothing more than his approval, when I was your age the only thing I care about was what he thought about me. I was reckless, I put my fellow Jedi in danger, and ultimately it lead to the death of the man who mentored me. Now, I still love, I still feel passion, but you must learn to control it. You can love your parents, as I did myself, but you must understand that if loving your parents is all you think about, then eventually you will do whatever it takes to save them. Sometimes you must push your emotions to the wayside and bring them back when it is safe. You do not have to give up your emotions, no, you just have to learn to be their master."
He listened intently to the girl as she spoke, know where she was coming from, having felt the exact same emotions she was feeling now. Being a Jedi was no easy task and lately he believed that it was harder to do than ever before. The Republic and the Jedi were in turmoil, the Sith were stronger than ever, and with so many people standing up for what they believed was the right thing to do it was almost impossible to pick a side. Was this how he saw things panning out? No, not at all, but he also knew that his vision of the future would never come true. It was a wishful fairy tale.
"When Teferi and I founded the Jedi Order all those years ago, we had no idea what the future held. The only thing that we knew was the the Galaxy that we loved, that we wanted to protect, was much bigger than us. We spent months hunting for anyone with even the slightest bit of talent to be trained because we knew that we would need more than the two of us to do what needed to be done. It was not like in the past where the Jedi could be picky, they would only train Jedi from birth, we had to recruit anyone who could wield a lightsaber no matter how reckless it was." He paused and reminisced about those days. Just the two Jedi Masters going planet to planet recruiting anyone and everyone. He was gone now, and Ben missed him greatly, but he knew there was no point in mourning.
"In a way, we knew. We knew that we were being careless with who we let in, but you must understand, we were weak and needed people who were willing to rebuild the galaxy, to make the Jedi whole again. The thing is, being a Jedi is more than carrying a lightsaber and calling yourself a peacekeeper, it is a lifelong decision chalked full of difficult decisions. There was a reason the Jedi Order of old only recruited people from birth, they had to drill in the ideals of the Jedi Order, they had to mold a young generation into the Jedi of the future. This life that you and I have chosen, it is not a life of luxury, and the other path... the path to the darkside.... it is much easier. It would be foolish to believe that bringing in people who had already developed beliefs, lived lives so much differently than Jedi, to continue down this path that is so unforgiving. We are hated by some, coveted by others, and misunderstood by most everyone besides those who train next to you in the temples." Was he ranting? Sure seemed like it, was he even answering her questions?
"Being a Jedi is not about adhering to some strict code that was created long before we were alive. It is about using the gift that you were given for the greater good. It is about standing up for what is right when no one else will, sacrificing comfort and safety so that someone else who is not as fortunate as you can just... survive another day. While passion and emotion most certainly can lead to the darkside, it is important, but even more important than that is realizing when it is too much. My father was a Jedi before me, and for years I wanted nothing more than his approval, when I was your age the only thing I care about was what he thought about me. I was reckless, I put my fellow Jedi in danger, and ultimately it lead to the death of the man who mentored me. Now, I still love, I still feel passion, but you must learn to control it. You can love your parents, as I did myself, but you must understand that if loving your parents is all you think about, then eventually you will do whatever it takes to save them. Sometimes you must push your emotions to the wayside and bring them back when it is safe. You do not have to give up your emotions, no, you just have to learn to be their master."
[member="Ben Watts"]
Well shit.
Lira took on the most introspective gaze one could expect from a young padawan like her. Eyes glazed over slightly, mouth went the tiniest bit agape, and short lines formed on her forehead. She had received an answer from Jedi Master Ben Watts, and it had been more than she bargained for. Truthfully she had expected some placating words, a few phrases that would calm her nerves and then send her on her way.
Instead, her worldview had been shaken. In the timespan of just a few moments Ben Watts had taken everything she'd known about the Jedi Order, broken it in half, and turned it upside down. He had openly admitted to the founding of the Order being a desperate time, had told her that the Jedi Code was not the end all be all of Jedi, and had also told her that ultimately she would have to make decisions that put not only herself in jeopardy, but those she loved.
In a way she had always known that, but Master Watts had simply brought the point home, and had begun a process of serious introspection within the young padawan.
She wasn't sure that she had ever met a Jedi Master that had ever been so honest with her. For a moment she simply stood there, her lips thinning as she thought about her next question. Unconsciously she chewed on the inside of her lips, then finally she spat out three small words, almost too quiet to hear. “Are you afraid?”
Perhaps that was a sensitive subject, but it was one that Avalore had been aching to ask any and all Jedi. The Republic was truthfully on its back foot. They had lost Alderaan, Coruscant, Camaas, Empress Teta, and a dozen other worlds to the One Sith. The truth was they were losing, and the Jedi felt that hit perhaps even more than the Republic.
She herself was afraid, afraid of coming home to a ruin, of being taken by the Sith and forcefully trained, of losing herself.
Lira wondered if it was the same for Ben.
Well shit.
Lira took on the most introspective gaze one could expect from a young padawan like her. Eyes glazed over slightly, mouth went the tiniest bit agape, and short lines formed on her forehead. She had received an answer from Jedi Master Ben Watts, and it had been more than she bargained for. Truthfully she had expected some placating words, a few phrases that would calm her nerves and then send her on her way.
Instead, her worldview had been shaken. In the timespan of just a few moments Ben Watts had taken everything she'd known about the Jedi Order, broken it in half, and turned it upside down. He had openly admitted to the founding of the Order being a desperate time, had told her that the Jedi Code was not the end all be all of Jedi, and had also told her that ultimately she would have to make decisions that put not only herself in jeopardy, but those she loved.
In a way she had always known that, but Master Watts had simply brought the point home, and had begun a process of serious introspection within the young padawan.
She wasn't sure that she had ever met a Jedi Master that had ever been so honest with her. For a moment she simply stood there, her lips thinning as she thought about her next question. Unconsciously she chewed on the inside of her lips, then finally she spat out three small words, almost too quiet to hear. “Are you afraid?”
Perhaps that was a sensitive subject, but it was one that Avalore had been aching to ask any and all Jedi. The Republic was truthfully on its back foot. They had lost Alderaan, Coruscant, Camaas, Empress Teta, and a dozen other worlds to the One Sith. The truth was they were losing, and the Jedi felt that hit perhaps even more than the Republic.
She herself was afraid, afraid of coming home to a ruin, of being taken by the Sith and forcefully trained, of losing herself.
Lira wondered if it was the same for Ben.
Ben Watts
I Am No One
[member="Lira Dajenn"]
He smiled gently at her when he saw her deep in thought. He guessed maybe he should have been a bit more gentle about it, but, he was not someone who sugar coated things. She asked if he was afraid and he thought about it for a few moments before answering. Fear was something he had always been great at hiding, to the point of not even feeling it anymore. But what fear was she referring to? When it came to the fear of dying, he had none, but the idea of the very Order that he had founded being destroyed by the Sith was a very frightening idea indeed.
"Afraid?" he asked quizzically, putting his hand on his chin. "No, there is no need to be afraid, what good would that do? The Sith have been a threat to me since I was a boy, and if I start showing fear now, then what was all of this for? They killed my master, my father, my best friend, and they took my home world, Coruscant...... they want me to be scared of them, they want you to be scared of them, and the only way we will be able to fight back is by showing that they cannot break us. Sure, I have my doubts, but I believe in the Jedi more than I believe the doubts in my head."
He smiled gently at her when he saw her deep in thought. He guessed maybe he should have been a bit more gentle about it, but, he was not someone who sugar coated things. She asked if he was afraid and he thought about it for a few moments before answering. Fear was something he had always been great at hiding, to the point of not even feeling it anymore. But what fear was she referring to? When it came to the fear of dying, he had none, but the idea of the very Order that he had founded being destroyed by the Sith was a very frightening idea indeed.
"Afraid?" he asked quizzically, putting his hand on his chin. "No, there is no need to be afraid, what good would that do? The Sith have been a threat to me since I was a boy, and if I start showing fear now, then what was all of this for? They killed my master, my father, my best friend, and they took my home world, Coruscant...... they want me to be scared of them, they want you to be scared of them, and the only way we will be able to fight back is by showing that they cannot break us. Sure, I have my doubts, but I believe in the Jedi more than I believe the doubts in my head."
[member="Ben Watts"]
For a moment she considered.
Her fear wasn't gone, not by a long shot. She was still scared, still terrified in fact. Lira had been perpetually scared for the last few months. She felt fear every time she woke up and remembered her friends were still trapped on Prakith. She felt fear whenever Hal instructed her on the use of lightsabers, she felt fear whenever she was sent on an assignment.
The truth was, Lira was nothing but a scared little girl.
Yet Ben's words gave her comfort. She was sure he had faced far more in his lifetime than she would ever believe. Yet he felt no fear, or claimed not too. Perhaps that was part of the emotional detachment he had spoken of, the need to conquer fear.
She frowned slightly, shaking her head.
“Thank you Master Watts. I know you must be busy enough as it is.” The Padawan had a lot to think about.
For a moment she considered.
Her fear wasn't gone, not by a long shot. She was still scared, still terrified in fact. Lira had been perpetually scared for the last few months. She felt fear every time she woke up and remembered her friends were still trapped on Prakith. She felt fear whenever Hal instructed her on the use of lightsabers, she felt fear whenever she was sent on an assignment.
The truth was, Lira was nothing but a scared little girl.
Yet Ben's words gave her comfort. She was sure he had faced far more in his lifetime than she would ever believe. Yet he felt no fear, or claimed not too. Perhaps that was part of the emotional detachment he had spoken of, the need to conquer fear.
She frowned slightly, shaking her head.
“Thank you Master Watts. I know you must be busy enough as it is.” The Padawan had a lot to think about.
Jedi Mom
[member="Lira Dajenn"]
"I see you've met Master Watts" She said as she approached the padawan "I can feel your fear, what's up?"
"I see you've met Master Watts" She said as she approached the padawan "I can feel your fear, what's up?"