Chocolate and Hangovers

[Kitt Solo]

Hands pulled away from him and instead rubbed up and down the sides of her thighs anxiously. "No...I mean, yes. There is - was another man." She paused, surprised at her own feelings. She would always love Alen. But the thing was, her heart was leaning and being pulled in another direction. Flint already had it.

Stomach twisted and chest ached.

"But I'm....falling for YOU Flint. But that's not everything."

Fingers trembled as the weight of what could happen after she told him became very clear. It could be the last time she sat on this couch, saw that look of tenderness in his eyes, and comfortably wore his shirt. But bottom line, she loved him. And as much as for him as for herself, she had to tell him.

"I can use the force."

 

[Flint Michigan]

For the first time Kitt had pulled away from him. Not just a gentle lean away, a pause, a suggestion to move to warmer places, but actually let him go completely. It was concerning, as was the way she was nervously rubbing those thighs of hers. But what she said next? It wasn't the expected "I'm in love with someone else" talk. In a way it sort of, but it was reluctant. As if a second thought. Flint would have been hurt by it, crushed even, but her next words solidified it. It wasn't the "I'm in love with someone else." talk. Yet that admission didn't seem to give her any comfort. Heck, if her shaking fingers were any indication, the words only made her more nervous.

"I can use the Force."


And it all came crashing down. The 'mood' as it were was gone, at least in Flint's mind. Replaced by silence and a sudden analysis everything he'd done with the Corellian. If there was perhaps any other lead-up he might have questioned her words, called it a joke, but her nervousness? The seriousness? It fit perfectly. He was quiet for a while, a long while, as he processed the information. He knew the questions he wanted to ask but he didn't know if he could trust her answers. He wanted too, and up until about a minute ago he'd have believed anything she said. Because he trusted her, and it was instinct to trust her. But now? Even if his gut told him to trust her, even if his instinct told him to side with her he could never know that it was actually his instinct, and not one implanted there.

It was a terrifying prospect, wanting to trust one's own mind but finding yourself unable to. But this confession? It seemed genuine. Felt spontaneous. And as Flint looked at her face he could see the concern in her eyes, the tremble of her frame. And then he found the one question that he decided he could trust the answer to.

"So you can use the Force." He said, the words sounding less a confident statement and more a concept he was trying to grasp. "Why tell me? Why not keep hiding it?"

[member="Kitt Solo"]

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

And it was suddenly cold. The master empath felt the change in Flint's emotions like a light switch. And she could see it all over his face. Her fingers came to rub up and down her own arms, crossing at her chest.

She just lost him and perhaps lost everything.

"Why tell you?" She choked it out slowly. "Isn't it obvious?" She leaned forward slightly, though arms remained tightly clutching herself - grounding herself. "I'm falling in love with you. And when we first met you made it very clear how you felt about space wizards." Fingers came up to quote his favorite and somewhat derogatory term.

"I thought I could keep work separated from my personal life. I thought you would never have to know. I'd finish out this job with you all and leave. Simple as that. But then you...you happened."

Maybe she had it all wrong. Maybe he never thought of her like that? He was a flyboy. Maybe she had been just another notch on his belt this entire time.

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

In truth Flint wasn't sure what answer he was expecting. He knew what he was hoping for, but he kept on thinking she'd say something else. Something manipulative. Something cold. But instead she looked . . . hurt. Hurt that he had asked the question. Hurt that it had taken him so long to think on what to say. Hurt that he didn't look at her the same way he did just moments ago. Before it had been so easy to just blame things on the Jedi. The Sith. The Force in general. But looking at Kitt right now? He didn't see the oppressor he expected. Just a woman, with sad eyes that hurt to see.

"I-" He struggled to find words to reply. "I need to-" He started again, and stopped just a bit farther than he had gotten before. A sigh came from his lips and he leaned over towards Kitt, wrapped his arms around her, and squeezed her tight. If he couldn't find the words to say perhaps his actions would help him out. "I'm falling for you too." He eventually returned a whisper in her ear as he held her close. He kept her there for a while, a long while, as if he was afraid she would slip away. Eventually he did, sliding back a bit and gaining enough distance to look her in the eyes. He was sad, but contemplative, trying to say something once again. He took a deep breath before deciding it was now or never.

"If I am going to tell this story, I need a beer." Flint said Or twelve he thought, before standing up off the couch and heading to the conservator. He did his best to make it clear that while he was heading off the couch he was still in the discussion. Didn't want her to think he was running off. When he got to the conservator he pulled out two bottles of beer and got a can opener, before returning to her side and popping off the caps. He offered her a bottle, probably not the best of ideas after a hangover, and chugged the other bottle before putting the now-empty bottle on the table.

It was a start he supposed.

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

His hug gave her hope and offered a thaw to the chilled moment. But it felt different. She wasn't sure how. And she wasn't entirely sure it was on his side. She wanted to nudge him with her shoulder but she was hesitant to do so.

In the flicker of a span of a second things had changed. But perhaps it wasn't bad change.

She took the beer but lofted a chestnut brow at his empty bottle. She offered him her own and spoke quietly. "I'm listening."

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

Flint looked at the beer a minute then back at Kitt. With a shrug and a small smile he picked it up and took a good swig, but put it back on the table next to them. She'd be free to have a drink, or perhaps he'd merely finish it off later, but chugging two beers without Kitt having anything didn't sit right with him. Maybe he was just being silly.

"I'm gonna try and keep this as short as possible, but lemme tell you why I don't like wi- Force users." He corrected, remembering that she didn't seem to like his old term for them and trying to say something a bit more friendly."Maybe that'll help me seem like less of a Hutt's behind." He said, not sure if it would or not. If she had the courage to tell him she had the Force thought? He could stomach through old wounds and tell her why he didn't like Jedi or Sith or whatever name they went by nowadays.

"Believe it or not you aren't the first lady with the misfortune of liking me." He said with a small grin. "Back when I was in the Republic I had a thing with a marine named Henrietta, but she preferred Henry. She rescued me after I got captured on a dogfight gone wrong, one thing lead to another, yadda yadda yadda. I eventually propose, she says yes." He said, reached for the beer, and took another swig before putting it back. "She was captured about two months afterwards. I spend the better part of half a year trying to figure out where she is. We find her eventually on a Sith prison world. Big invasion, lot of soldiers, Jedi, Sith, whole shebang. I figure out which prison she's in, drop off a squad to try and rescue her. While I'm waiting for the evac team to bring her out one of the Jedi decide it's not worth it. Changes the freaking weather, destroys the entire prison complex. Karking Matsu Ike." He spouts the name like a curse.

"That's when I left the Republic and like a stupid kid head to the guys on the block that were fighting 'em. And things don't go well."

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

Hand came up and rested on his shoulder. She gave him a light squeeze, letting her fingers linger there for support. But she was also ready to quickly withdraw if he needed his space. So he had been engaged. That was news. But that was neither here nor there.

She could feel his pain. Raw. Real. It only added to her own sorrow for him.

"Flint," she whispered his name. She didn't have magical words to comfort him. But it was all in her tone: I'm here. I'm listening. I've got you.

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

There weren't any interruptions, no claims of "Hey, that's not me.", no "You were engaged?". Kitt just put a hand on him, whispered his name just loud enough for him to hear, and listened. It was comforting, in it's own way. Not simply that she was trying to be there for him, but also that she wasn't rushing to conclusions. Wanted to hear the full story. Perhaps . . . perhaps her using the Force didn't change as much as he thought it did.

"Well, things started well I should say. They strap me into a TIE-Fighter and have me in a few fights before they transfer me into some elite starfighter crew on a Sith Lord's personal carrier. Lady Veloria was her name. Her apprentice, guy named Hagron, ends up being one of guys in my Squadron. Through him we all get to see our Sith Lord Captain quite a bit, and she takes a liking to me. Her and I end up sharing a bunk on nights she can sneak me in. We do this for months before she says I'm not some fling, that she wants to be with me, and you know what I do? I take a knife and stab her in the back. I have no idea what's going on anymore, and her apprentice comes in and arrests me. Sticks me in some cell. I sit there just wondering what the kriff happened and suddenly I remember Herny. Hadn't thought of her in months and she just comes up in my mind out of the blue. Feel horrible and confused, until Hagron comes back. He tells me that I was a fall guy from the start. That he'd been shaping my mind to forget Henry, to seduce Veloria, to kill her so he can move up the ladder. And before I get executed he has to rub it in my face. Kriffing bastard." Flint curses as he takes another swig of ale and find it empty. Flint let out a heavy sigh.


"The rest of my squad got me out alive, but the Jedi, the Sith, or at least the one's I've met have just treated those without the Force as tools. Toys. Cattle. It's'why I keep in this ship. Never on any planet for too long. Can't outrun the Republic or the Sith or any of the big Galactic powers. But maybe I can outfly 'em."

 

[Kitt Solo]

"Holy kriff. Flint...," she began but words escaped her. Even to say something like 'I'm sorry' seemed like a canned response. The strong urge to protect him welled within her chest. She wanted to wrap him up in her arms. But she didn't know if he was ready for that or even wanted it. She wasn't going to push it.

And she was frustrated. She felt his pain, mistrust, and confusion. All righteous feelings. And she couldn't -do-anything. This wasn't some wound she could just slap a bacta patch on. Her Corellian side started to come out.

"That Jedi chick I can't do much about. I'm pretty sure they banished her to a prison for life." She stood and began pacing angrily in front of Flint. "That other son of a bantha@$&@&$&@&&@" more Corellian curses,"Hagron? I'm going to find him and I'm gonna, I'm gonna...do something," fist clenched in her open palm.

Shoulders rose up and down as her breathing quickened. She turned to Flint and realized what she must've looked like: a semi-wet haired woman on a tirade in his shirt.

"Sorry," she gasped. "It just makes me so angry. I know I can't convince you that not every force user is like that. I know you can't just trust me with the flip of a switch. But I'm here for you. Or...," she hesitated. Sometimes when you really loved someone you were willing to give them up. Even if it would hurt like a son of a..."I can go." Stars it ached to say that. The pain in her chest was back. "Give you your space. Whatever you need."

[member="Flint Michigan"]

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

"Hey now, hey now Bounty Hunter. I can't afford to be sending you after people." Flint said, only partly joking as he attempted to calm down the Corellian and her Corellian cursing ways. Despite his efforts she still breathed quickly, heavily, before she turned to face. The look on her face was one of realization. That she was going off. Didn't necessarily help anything or solve any problems, but her anger? Her humanity? Felt good to see. Helped distance Kitt from the whole "Force" thing. She apologized, she said she was angry, that she understood where he was coming from, that she wanted to be there for him. Or that she could leave, despite all the pain he could hear from her voice as she said it. Was that love? It could have been fear but . . . no. It wasn't fear.

"Go?" Flint first response. "I mean, I can't stop you but who would Tiam gossip with in her room? Who'd trade bounty hunting stories with Cat? Give the Nexu a rubdown when she needed it?" A faint smile lit his face as he stepped a bit closer. His arms would stretch out, hand trying to get a grasp on those clenched fists of hers.

"Take you home after your next big hangover in two weeks?"

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

Fists relaxed and finally un-clenched in his hands. A small smile graced her distressed face. She felt like she was only a few steps away from falling apart. She looked down at their entwined fingers and then up to his face.

"Aren't I supposed to be the one comforting you?" A flutter of laughter left her throat after what he said next. "Oh, I mean...I would stay for them, of course. And heeey," she released one of his hands to shove him lightly on the shoulder. "Since when have I ever, given the Nexu a good rubbing down? And we both know the next hangover might beinoneweekoreightdaysorsomething," she mumbled the last part quickly and bit back an unsure smile.

"Where does this leave us?"

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

It was a more difficult question than it should have been. Flint wanted nothing more than to say "The same place we were at twenty minutes ago." but her having the Force? It changed things. In this moment he didn't think that she had ever used the Force to harm him or manipulate him, but the thought of her having that power scared him. Though he had moved on from Henry's death he hadn't really ever moved on from how she died, and how he was powerless to stop it. How he was powerless to remember her in the wake of a mentalist. Kitt wasn't the person that would do things like that, at least he didn't believe her to be, but that didn't mean she didn't know people with that power. Being with her could mean he'd go into a whole new world, filled with powers he didn't understand.

And he wasn't sure if he was prepared for that.

"Kitt I-" Flint began, trying to find the right way to say what he wanted. "I'm a simple guy. My life is one of ships, credits, blasters. Not illusions, telekinesis, or lightsabers. I don't know if I'm ready to be in a life like yours. I don't know if I ever will be. But for you? I'll try."

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

Sometimes being an empath sucked because you felt everything. Heart ached in her chest and she couldn't stop the flicker of pain pass across her features. She wasn't expecting his words to be anything different. If they had been, she'd doubt their sincerity.

But they still stung like a mother.

And the risk was HUGE. She was already falling in love with him. If he decided he didn't want to go through it after all, that rejection would hurt ten times worse than what she felt right now.

She didn't know if she could do it. Take that risk, take that leap of faith. Trust.

"As long as you stop saying force wizards in such a derogatory manner," she tried to lighten the mood a little, "then, I think I can try too. I'd rather have you hurt me now, though, than later."

She winked, partly joking.

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

"Well, if you say so . . . " Flint said and then squeezed the hands he was holding. Really hard. It wouldn't be all that pleasant for Kitt. His face lit with a mischevious grin that was may or may not have been getting slapped at this point. He'd have taken it if it came though.


"So . . . I guess I have a lot of questions now, but I don't want to overload you too much, so I'll just ask one for now. If you have the Force, and my errr, remarks were as bad as I think they were, why did you stay after day one?"

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

"Oww. OWW. Very funny. Hey, watch your grip, spacer. I still need these fingers to make pies with." Her turn. She pulled him suddenly, as if to pull his muscled-form off balance and into her bubble. Her face grew more serious as she pondered his question.

"Because you had a nice ass."

But not too serious.

"KIDDING. I mean, not about the....but you know. I meant what I said in the interview. I needed an escape. You seemed like a decent guy that I could trust even though forcist." She grinned. "But the people I worked with, before. They're called the Fringe. One of the head councilors was involved in the murder of my sister. I just needed some space to process it all and to focus on something else. I still am processing it. Ever think about adding a question in your interview about whether or not the person can use the force?"

Single-chestnut brow lofted.

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

Flint wobbled slightly forward, taking a step towards Kitt to regain his balance. And another one after that for good measure as her face stiffened a bit in thought. She gave her 'reason' and Flint couldn't help himself. He just opened up and laughed. His uproar was tamed soon as she admitted her joke, stumbling around in her words for a second as she did so. The conversation soon turned more serious however with tales of escape, decent guys, Fringers, and the murder of a loved one.

All Flint needed to do was change the genders, nations, and metaphysical potential and they almost had the same story. The thought of that made Flint sad, or perhaps just empathetic. He didn't have enough hubris to think that his story or life was unique or the saddest fate a man could endure, but neither did he think that it was one that should be shared. His first instinct was to reach out and hold her in his arms, but she had said she wanted some space. He gave into that instinct anyways. For a while he didn't answer her question, just held her tight before loosening and giving his response.

"Didn't think out of all the people on the extranet I'd find someone with the Force." Flint shrugged. "Figured they'd have better things to do than ship cargo." Another shrug. "I suppose it all worked out thought."

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

Arms wrapped around his muscles back as she leaned again him in the embrace. When she talked about losing her estranged sister she thought each time it would get easier. But it didn't. Still hurt just as much. But the hurt was a mixture of raw loss and betrayal.

Her face turned into his bare chest for a moment, the hear from his body radiated through the fabric of that thin shirt of his she wore. She pulled back, just a little so she could look him in the eyes. "I mean, you DID get a B. A. mechanic who is clearly a ten on the hot scale."

She grinned.

"I'd say things worked out pretty good so far."

Baby steps.

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

Flint smiled, putting out a small laugh.

"She's humble too. Bit greasy though. Smidgin of a drinking problem. Can be a troublemaker at times." Flint grinned as he listed off all sorts of fun character traits. "But man, can she cook." He complimented, and for a moment his thoughts drifted to food.

Oh yeah . . .

"Hey, have I told you what I got you when you were out yet?"

 

[Kitt Solo]

[member="Flint Michigan"]

She laughed into his chest before pulling back in curiosity. "No...," arms left his back as she slowly untangled herself and gave him the freedom to move. Arms crossed over her chest as she shot him an inquisitive look.

"New pie pans?"

 

[Flint Michigan]

[member="Kitt Solo"]

"Even. Better. Than new pie pans." Flint said excitedly. "C'mon." He said, and his left arm leave her, now keeping her to his right side. He'd walk with her slowly bringing her towards the cargohold. Even with the life support systems fixed the cargo hold was a bit chilly, so he'd pull her a bit closer to him as they got in there. Whole not-wearing-a-shirt thing tended to make him a little more vulnerable to the shivers.

"Check cargo box 63." He said, a bit excited. When she got too it an opened it she'd find a shipment of welding equipment and stray droid parts. That wasn't what Flint intended to give her, but to his misfortune he had remembered the cargo box number incorrectly. Her Dark Chocolate Hyperdrive was in box 36.