Private Chasing Waterfalls

[Lossa Darcuhl]

Location: Ossus
Equipment: Weighted Training Robes, Concealed Sling Bag, Concealed Device, Double Bladed Lightsaber
Tags: Iris Arani

The first attempt at having a painting day with Iris had resulted in the duo spending time cleaning the hall of their work. This time however, Lossa had a wiser idea.

She'd spent time away from the temple wading through the jungle setting around them for the perfect spot.

Even dragging a pair of easels out to the place she had found for them. A large blanket, paired with a snack bag and some drinks made for a wonderful spot to paint at their leisure.

The spot in question a small waterfall that fed into a lazy pond filled with lilies and smaller water born life.

If it hadn't been for her goal of getting Iris to smile, she might have spent more time watching the little things swim to and fro. Finalizing the setup with a trip for paints and canvas, she stopped by the last place she had seen Iris to invite her out.

"Hey! I know painting didnt go well last time, but I think I found a better spot this time that won't get us in trouble. Wanna see?" She offered, holding her hand out with a smile.

 

[Iris Arani]

Physical therapy was.. Annoying. A lot of it was just things she could do before. She understood. The damage to her muscles was extensive. She needed to build it back up gradually. But it was boring. And frustrating. Trying to get her right hand to lift and stack small blocks, only to watch her hand tremble and knock over the tower she'd already made. More than frustrating. Disheartening.

She pulled up her hoodie, stuffed her hands in her pockets, and left the medical wing of the Jedi temple. Didn't matter she still had to finish her daily set. She was just, mad. Too mad to deal with her exercises for the day. Confidently right as Lossa Darcuhl walked over. Iris blinked in surprise, looking to the Zeltron, then to her hand.

"Um.. Yeah..?"

 

[Lossa Darcuhl]

Location: Ossus
Equipment: Weighted Training Robes, Concealed Sling Bag, Concealed Device, Double Bladed Lightsaber
Tags: Iris Arani

The medical wing was by and by her least favorite place to visit. And the place always reeked of antiseptic and that strange lingering smell of too clean for her own comfort. It wasn't difficult to feel Iris and her frustrations as she looked to her hand.

"Not having an easy time of it? Let's take a break then. Come on." The smile didn't falter as her own jubilation filtered through the area.

Tinges of joy and anticipation coloring the air around her for Iris to see as she led the other padawan to the secluded spot with care and being mindful of helping her when she could.

But also letting Iris do what she was confident doing.

Her own experiences telling her when to back off and let the other work through holding the sticks back and when one might have been frustrating her beyond her already tense feelings.

Even with the sense of joy and anticipation about her, there was a lingering darkness at the corners of that joy. Her own feelings and thoughts lingering on when she was incapable.

"The doctors and nurses mean well. They want to help but sometimes they push too hard. More confident in what you can do than you are." She muttered looking back to Iris as she walked. "It's okay to be frustrated and angry though. It's a slow process getting better."

 

[Iris Arani]

A break.

Yeah. A break sounded nice. Iris smiled faintly, following along after Lossa Darcuhl , taking her hand and letting the Zeltron Padawan lead them.. Wherever it was they were going. The pure excitement and joy in the colors had Iris plenty curious as they walked. But as Lossa started to talk, already she could see something was.. Off. It wasn't about where they were going, either.

More where they came from.

The heavily scarred hand in Lossa's own squeezed gently as Iris smiled. Trying to be supportive in her own way for whatever darkness was lingering in the girls mind. "I'm glad you got better."

 

[Lossa Darcuhl]

Location: Ossus
Equipment: Weighted Training Robes, Concealed Sling Bag, Concealed Device, Double Bladed Lightsaber
Tags: Iris Arani

She paused at Iris's words. A visible hiccup in their walking as she hung her head.

"I'm better than I was." She spoke quietly, continuing on after a long moment of reflection. It felt right to share in this moment.

Shame colored her feelings. Longing and sadness paired right behind it as the joy was swallowed up.

"I'll never-How I know breaks are important." Swallowing the feelings and switching gears quickly, her eyes shifted from the soft pink to a dark crimson as she drew in the pheromones around her.

There was nothing in the air to drown Iris out.

"It's about pacing yourself. Finding what you can do. Finding what you can't. Finding if you're brave enough to push those boundaries." She wasn't going to let herself wallow in front of Iris however. Glancing back with a bright smile through the lingering shame and sadness as joy tried to emerge once more.

The scene opened up before them. Light shimmering against the water that fell from a stream out of sight. Rocks glistening as the bubbles below teamed with smaller life beneath lily pads and flowers.

"I figured this would be a good spot. Fresh air. Nothing like the pressure inside the office." The view did help her feelings slip away, looking over it with dark red eyes.

Her hand trembled despite the brave face she put on.

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris smiled and nodded. Followed around in silence. But she could see it. The colors around Lossa Darcuhl couldn't be changed, not everything. The scarred Padawan wasn't sure what to say or do at this point. Yet, whatever it was Lossa wanted to show off, it seemed to put a smile on her face. So.. Iris wouldn't say anything. Not yet. It wasn't until they made it to the view that Lossa had been so dead set on getting them to that she finally did something other than the quiet follow.

Both scarred hands. The one missing it's pinky with cracked and broken skin. The other of marred, ruined flesh that felt almost entirely like scar tissue. Both reached up and took the Zeltron by the cheeks. Like she'd done with Briana Sal-Soren twice before, she looked Lossa right in the eyes. Absolutely unsettling to anyone who spent a long time around Iris, really. The Padawan never looked at people. Just the colors around them. She stared for a moment, still quiet.

Then smiled.

"It's okay to still feel sad."

 

[Lossa Darcuhl]

Location: Ossus
Equipment: Weighted Training Robes, Concealed Sling Bag, Concealed Device, Double Bladed Lightsaber
Tags: Iris Arani

She let herself enjoy the sight before Iris took her face in her hands. Failing to notice the scarring or burnt skin as she looked into the others eyes.

Deep crimson shone in the light as Iris spoke.

Her smile dropping as Iris smiled and lanced her thoughts with sincerity. Cracked the shell that she kept around her feelings. Tear bright, she gazed at Iris, letting her hands grab the edges of Iris's shirt.

Her lip trembled, trying to keep her composure.

For who she didn't know. Why didn't matter anymore. The bubbling font let loose as the zeltron leaned into Iris and broke.

"I'm sorry! This was meant to be..." She choked on the words. Her breathing shortening dramatically between the sobs as she fumbled between holding onto Iris and trying to get to the bag beneath her robes.

Fear and dread crept in to replace her feelings.

She'd hated crying. Always hated what it did to her as she stumbled backward, panicking both mentally and physically. Her throat felt tight, her heart raced, and she felt dizzy. A hand shot up to her throat as a strangled sound came from her, the strap of the concealed bag pulled out with one hand.

Dropping to her knees, she spilled the contents of the bag rather than trying to sort through it by memory.

An inhaler fell out last, behind pill bottles, a small cylindrical tube, and a few small containers that might have held balm of some kind. Her free hand scrambled for the inhaler as she gasped violently for air.

 

[Iris Arani]

This was easier. Facing someone else's problem. Helping them through it rather than suffer through her own. She kept the calm smile, her hands shifting to let go of Lossa Darcuhl 's cheeks to instead hug her fellow Padawan closer. Trying to sooth the Zeltron through her sobs with a gentle pet of her head. Like Valery had done for Iris countless times now. "It's okay." She kept her voice calm, level. Everything about her was calm.

This was easier.

Until Lossa stepped back, gasping for air. Panic. Fear. The sudden change threw Iris for a loop. She reached her hands up, unsure on what to do as Lossa fell to her knees to try and get the.. Inhaler? Iris ended up dropping to her own knees, concern and worry clear in her eyes.

"What's.. Are you okay? What's happening?"

 

[Lossa Darcuhl]

Location: Ossus
Equipment: Weighted Training Robes, Concealed Sling Bag, Concealed Device, Double Bladed Lightsaber
Tags: Iris Arani

She struggled through, her vision doing a slow spin as she let loose of her throat and used both hands to grab the inhaler. The cap was suddenly the most difficult thing in the world as she wheezed and gasped.

Her eyes fluctuated between pink and red, the fear becoming tangible one second before disappearing only to reappear in strength as the device was pressed to her lips and squeezed.

The first breath was difficult. Unable to draw a full breath as she felt the mist cover her tongue and throat. She dared press it tight again as she drew a deeper breath the second time, feeling air rush in.

She drew a full breath finally. Eyes stinging from tears and trying to keep them wide open to see. Focusing to make the world stop spinning so hard as she dropped inhaler to put her hands down and steady herself.

In through the nose. Out through the mouth she repeated to herself as she finally heard what Iris was saying.

"I'm sorry...my lungs...are trash." She gasped. Still leaning on her hands as she tried to give Iris a thumbs up. She needed to pick up her meds.

Desperation had made her dump the lot of them on the ground as she slowly regained her breathing.

"Crying makes...my diaphragm...work...to hard." She tried explaining, pushing off her hands and pulling the contents of her bag to her slowly.

The fear was slowly replaced by relief but only before guilt and shame reared their ugly heads

"Don't tell anyone...else please."

 

[Iris Arani]

This was.. Horrifying. Not understanding what was happening, only knowing that something was deathly wrong with Lossa Darcuhl and how she struggled to breath, Iris could only try to help. She wanted to help, nothing more than that. How? She didn't know. Cuts, bruises, broken bones. Iris knew how to fix a lot of things like that through the Force. There was a limit, sure, but if she could see it she could at least understand it.

But the Zeltron was just.. Dying.

Then she wasn't. The inhaler did it's job in opening the closed airways. Still, Iris just looked panicked. Afraid. Had she done something wrong? She didn't want to see someone else taken from her. Taken while all she could do was watch. She only nodded to Lossa as the Zeltron explained. Crying did this?

".. Are you sure you're okay?"

 

[Lossa Darcuhl]

Location: Ossus
Equipment: Weighted Training Robes, Concealed Sling Bag, Concealed Device, Double Bladed Lightsaber
Tags: Iris Arani

She sat back, pulling a bottle towards her before giving a heavy sigh.

"I'm as good as I can be. I had treatments when I was a baby for stuff." She explained with a shrug. Her stomach hurt, throat burned, and a headache was forming already.

"If I am not prepared to cry or get scared, my muscles overwork and...well. I can't breath." Her chin dipped a little at the admission still holding onto the inhaler. "I take medicines and supplements. Have to exercise to keep healthy, but not so much to drop my levels down to low."

 

[Iris Arani]

Iris watched and listened, the worry still clear in the young Padawan's eyes. Lossa Darcuhl said she was fine, but.. Iris really had never seen this before. It was honestly scary. Scarier than having to deal with the Sith or even being thrown from the train. She closed her eyes, calming herself. No, if Lossa said she was fine, then Iris would trust that. ".. Is there no way to help you?"

 

[Lossa Darcuhl]

Location: Ossus
Equipment: Weighted Training Robes, Concealed Sling Bag, Concealed Device, Double Bladed Lightsaber
Tags: Iris Arani

The small huff of defeated laughter marked the slowly return to normal.

"Not without some extreme surgery...or a time machine." Something between a smile and a frown as she placed everything where it had been.

"Old ion engines give off radiation. And, well. When your travelling sometimes you get caught up in other peoples business like my mom did." She explained. "I hadn't been born yet. Was still growing. Mom...it makes her sad to think about. But. It can't be that bad. I'm alive at least. I can smile and make others happy."

 

[Iris Arani]

Extreme surgery or a time machine?

That.. Was out of the realm Iris understood. Something made Lossa Darcuhl sick, and there wasn't an easy way to fix it. But.. Yeah. She was alive. She could smile, make others happy. Iris frowned though. Again her hands took the Zeltron's cheeks, pulling her to stare into her eyes. Focus quietly, as if trying to read Lossa's very soul. "But are you happy?"