Private Balance in Small Things

[Corazona von Ascania]

Cora leaned into Makko. She breathed in deep - a sudden, long inhale as she let herself feel the comfort and familiarity around her. What she'd left, temporarily trading this for cold durasteel and blood.

For the longest time, she simply stood, enveloped in the warmth of her family. Lucy's little fingers curled into the collar of her shirt.

Guilt was an ever-present facet of her life, but now it washed over her anew. Harder and stronger, dragging her into depths that weren't quite dark. Not as long as Makko was here. Not as long as Lucy was here.

Cora's hand rubbed along her daughter's back to a slow rhythm.

"How was she?" came her raw whisper.

Makko Vyres

 

[Daxin Veyr]

.

 

[Makko Vyres]

Corazona von Ascania

Makko didn’t answer right away. His hand remained steady at her back, thumb brushing slow, grounding circles against the fabric of her shirt. He could feel the tension in her, like patt of her was still standing somewhere else, somewhere colder.

"She was…" he exhaled softly, searching for the right word. "Herself."

A faint, tired smile touched his mouth.

"Sometimes curious and sometimes very very grumpy."

Makko let silence fall for a little while. He couldn't hold it against Cora wanting this moment with Luciana.

"Do you want to tell me what happened tomorrow?" It was a small offer of respite from whatever was eating at her feelings.

 

[Corazona von Ascania]

Cora awoke the next morning in her own bed. Not in a bunk or on a cot. Not aboard some shuddering transport. In her own bed, soft and stable, with her husband beside her and their daughter wedged between them.

Those few days had felt like weeks. She’d never been separated from Luciana for more than a day.

Now, she couldn’t help the way her stomach seemed to be sinking perpetually. She had abandoned her daughter, albeit to the comfort of her own home and within her father’s arms. But a child should be with their mother, and a mother should be with her child. Everything about leaving had felt wrong, but being chased from the core had made her feel unsafe.

With the back of her knuckles, Cora stroked along the curve of one tiny, chubby cheek.

“I wanted to protect her,” she murmured. “The Sith are active again. They’re getting too close. I had to do s…”

Cora trailed as Lucy’s sprawled arms stretched. The babe settled, and Cora leaned to place a kiss at the side of her head.

“I don’t know how Valery did it,” she confessed in a whisper. “Leaving her children to fight. I feel so guilty.”

Makko Vyres

 

[Kadann]

.

 

[Makko Vyres]

MAKKO

Luciana didn't wake and start screaming. Makko took the win. He looked across their daughter and Cora and let himself slowly wake.

"I don't know either," Makko said softly. "I don't think there is an answer."

He glanced down, a swirl of emotions passed across his features. It was early and he felt everything.

"I was upset, I was angry and I was everything in between," he admitted.

"But then, what future does she have if the Galaxy falls to the Sith? She's force sensitive. They'll use that."

"I felt angry because why couldn't the Galaxy be a Galaxy where we can just live in peace together."

 

[Corazona von Ascania]

Cora inhaled sharply. She bit down a sudden swell of emotion before it could rise in her throat and bleed through her eyes.

Her fingers stilled where they stroked Lucy's little cheek.

"I'm angry too," she whispered. "If you were to be mad at me," Cora slowly lifted her tired gaze to Makko's own. "I could understand that."

Her eyes dropped back down to Luciana, who squirmed in her sleep. "I don't want to be apart from her, and I don't want her to grow up without me - without us - in her life. But if the galaxy falls to the Sith…"

It had seemed like an impossibility when the Alliance had stood. After Exegol, the battles had been few and far in between. The Sith had seemed content to stay behind their Blackwall until the imperials exposed the Alliance for the paper nexu it had become.

Cora fell silent, watching her baby as she slept. She listened to those little breaths, found comfort in the rhythmic rise and fall of her little chest.

"Did she…do you think that she might've missed me?" she croaked.

Makko Vyres

 

[Makko Vyres]

"Did she…do you think that she might've missed me?" she croaked.

Makko let out a slow, shaky breath.

"She was fine, but a little less settled. Of course she misses you," Makko said.

There was no lie that would make things better. If he told her that her absence hadn't affected their daughter that might bring a modicum of comfort, but then she would worry about their connection.

Am I angry at her? He asked himself.

He looked at Cora and sighed.

"I'm not mad at you. I'm feeling a lot of things and I haven't had enough sleep."

"What happened then?" he asked.