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Approved Species Asherian

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an_elf_traveler_in_forest_by_lathander1987-d46dmk7.jpg
(the ears are not like that, actually)​
(made by Jiwon Kim, dA)​

Asherians, the Harbingers of Culture


Designation: Sentient
Homeworld: Ashera
Language: Galactic Basic Standard, Ashian
Average height of adults: 2 metres
Skin colour: All human skin colours
Hair colour: All human hair colours
Breathes: Type I

Strengths:
  • Live Longer - Asherians are able to live for 500 years, which is longer than many other species, including humans.
  • Cultural Mind - Asherians have a highly cultural mind, seeing much more beauty in culture than most other species do.
  • Civilised - being members of a great civilisation, Asherians have developed a highly civilised nature, being calm and peaceful, also being philosophic and diplomatic at the same time.
  • Natural Force Sense Talents - the Force-sensitive members of Asherian population are more known for their Force Sense powers. It's in their nature to be better in it than in any other field of the Force. The natural affinity towards Sense powers includes all Sense powers which could be found here, for example. This means high-tier Masters would even be able to track things others wouldn't be able to or would require lots of effort to learn. Asherians can learn Sense powers without too much effort put into them. The most powerful masters of the Asherian kind can also work against the White Current without having studied it that much. They, like White Current users, are able to sense the ripples cause by it, but are less powerful in it than an experienced user of such a power. However, Asherians must still study the White Current to successfully use it.
Weaknesses:
  • Highly Infectable - Asherians become ill a lot easier than humans because of their lacking immune system. For example, chemical attacks would also have greater effects on them and depending on what kind of a chemical is used, could even have effects which the chemical might not have on other species. Also foreign viruses and bacteria can be a problem and in some cases, require special treatment and doctor supervisor.
  • Natural Lack of Alter Powers - because of the fact that they are better in Force Sense, Asherians are a lot worse in Alter powers. They can use them, but it takes a lot more time to learn them. Alter powers would be all Force powers which alter environment, such as Telekinesis, Force Jump, Force Lightning, and much more which could be found here.
  • Weak - as Asherians are naturally a bit more slender, they are also a lot weaker. Their bones are easer to be broken, much higher gravity would be a serious problem, and so would colder environments.
  • Religion Fanatics - Asherians can't live without their religion. Basically. They are so obsessed with it that many of them just can't socialise with people who don't follow the same faith.
The Force and Force-Sensitivity: The most powerful Asherian Force-users would be the highest ranking Bishops, the one who have control over a High Cathedral. Reaching that rank would approximately take the same time it would take for a Padawan to reach the rank of High Councilor plus a few more years and the chances for that to happen are also quite the same. To achieve a higher rank in the Asherian Rank Progression, one must show true faith and knowledge of both the Force powers and their holy book. A set of difficult tests would have to be initiated by a Blessed's Priest which would contain three different obstacles from all three different paths (faith, Blessing (Force), and holy book). The tests would be made by the Priests themselves but must maintain the difficulty set by the Grand Bishop of Dalaria. In general, the trials would be considered a bit more difficult than the ones a Jedi Padawan has to complete.

Becoming a Master, however, requires true knowledge and faith. A Priest who desires to become a Bishop would have to be extremely loyal to the nation and show respect to the High Bishops, but most of all, be kind and helpful. Priests don't have to complete any tests, but Bishops must be able to see the Priest as an exemplary Blessed person in order to be able to give them the rank.

The most powerful Force-sensitive would be the Grand Bishop of Dalaria.

As it has already been mentioned, Asheriane powerful Bishops would be able to sense the ripples of White Current, but that takes years of meditation, peace in mind, and concentration to be able to do that. While most people of the Asherian kind can feel a bit of the White Current even without the special training, one can not fight against it without proper training. Using the White Current powers would take even more years of training and takes just as much time as it would take for a random other Force-sensitive to learn it, even though the species' powers in the Force Sense would be much greater.

Distinctions: Asherians are much like humans, but they are known for their taller and skinnier build, which also makes them a bit weaker. Their eyes are also a bit smaller than humans', but the most interesting fact about their eyes it that every single Asherian has complete heterochromia. Another remarkable thing may be that Asherians' eyes start glowing when they use the Force. Its reason is quite unknown, but it is believed it's caused by the Force manifesting itself through the eyes of Asherians. The glow's colour can vary, but mostly, it is light blue. Other common ones are green, red, black, and white, the two latter ones typically being seen on Master (Bishop) ranked people.
Average Lifespan: 500 standard years
Races: Much like humans, different skin colour means a different race. Every region's inhabitants are also considered as different races, but there are too many to list them. Each of these races has an unique trait, though. For an example, Dalarian Asherians in general have naturally red hair, Ancetrians, however, tend to have an epicanthic fold.
Diet: Same as humans.
Communication: Holocommunication, written, verbal.

Culture: The Asheriane people, the whole planet of Ashera, is a gold pot of culture. Standing amongst the galactically modern planets, this wonderful world is considered highly civilised and some even call it the most culturally advanced planet in the galaxy. Most of such people are the natives of Ashera though, so the statement of it being the most cultural planet could be a bit exaggerated.

Society of Ashera is simply divided into three non-equal classes. The class system has some general rules though, but is not as limited and restrictive as a caste system would be: most of the society consists of the Ashére class, which is the societal class of simple people who do their simple jobs. Their jobs are not too limited, the only rule about them is that they can't be in any governmental position nor can they rule a city or any other location. Business owner and leader jobs are allowed, though. Neither can the Ashére people be working on any religious position like a priest or a bishop, not even talking about being the Grand Bishop of Dalaria. Ashére are mostly kind people, known for the lack of crime amongst their class. Even though there is crime, it's not notable, typically being only cases of thievery.

The second class, the Nevére class is made out of religious figures like priests, bishops, regional bishops and so on until the top of the religious branch. They can only work in a church, not in any other position. Only the Grand Bishop of Dalaria has this exception as they can also be the ruler of Ashera if there is a need for that. Nevére working times are set for them depending on their position, or so called "Theri'Anuili". For example, a priest would only have to work in the church on every Primeday, and having the responsibility to aid the lower class people on every other day except Benduday, which is completely free of work for every class.

The final, highest class of Asheriane, is the class of rulers, or Phievere. It consists of all governmental workers (the ruler him-/herself, advisors, all important people working for the ruler, regional rulers, city mayors, etc.). This class can only work on the position they have been determined to have, and can't progress any further, besides the Royal Advisor who would have to take the place of the previous ruler in case they didn't have any family before death and the Grand Bishop of Dalaria is not willing to take the position. All of these positions in the Phievere class are hereditary, meaning that the firstborn child of the previous positionholder gets to continue their mother or father's job.

Moving from one class to another is possible, but that's where the rules come in. The third class (lowest) can only move to the second one by being a Blessed, which is considered as the apprentice rank of any Priest or Bishop. If it happens, the citizen of the third class automatically shifts to the second one. No more class changes are allowed for the lowest class. Then there is the second-to-first, which can only happen with the Grand Bishop of Dalaria. In case the Grand Bishop is granted the position of the planet's ruler, they automatically shift to the first class while still remaining on the position of Grand Bishop of Dalaria, meaning they're officially members of two societal classes at the same time. This is known as the Union of Two or "Bi'Unia". However, there is also the movement of the first class. Any first class citizen can move to the lower classes if
- they find themselves to be Blessed, they shift to the second class.
- their position in the first class is taken away by a higher-ranking leader, they move to the lowest class if the previous condition of being a Blessed is not fulfilled. If it is, they move to the second class.

These societal classes have not been a problem during the recent times, but in the past, have even caused wars. In the past, the societal class system wasn't the only thing which determined how the society works, though. A long time ago, before the Four Hundred Year Darkness, the society was patriarchial, meaning only men were able to succeed and basically all women were considered as lowest class citizens, even if their husband may have been the ruler, for example. At the moment though, the society is gender-neutral, meaning nobody can judge a person by their gender.

Society of the planet seemingly works, even though there are a few conflicts which must be discussed by the ruler's advisors, most of these cases are a problem if the Grand Bishop is in two classes at the same time, as it's seen as the biggest problem about the society. People of the planet are caring, love culture, and are actually quite a lot like humans, but the only exceptions may be the fact that there is basically no grand scale crime, and the citizens love culture.

The government. The governmental system of the planet is absolute theocratic monarchy, so the planet is ruled by the High King (sometimes Queen) of Dalaria. Every city has its own lesser kings, but they all must abide to the king of Dalaria, who holds more of a ceremonial position. Most of the executive powers are in the hands of regional rulers, and only if there are conflicts in law system, the High King of Dalaria must act. So, the High King of Dalaria has basically the ceremonial position of the planet's ruler, but has absolute power over the capital, which is Dalaria, just like every other regional king has near-absolute power over their own city. If it's needed, the High King of Dalaria will use their absolute powers on the whole planet.

The Royal Advisor is the highest ranking advisor of the High King of Dalaria, and also the person who must keep track of the whole planet. While he/she doesn't have to monitor the whole society's every movement, all law changes must be presented to him/her and he/she must also check the complete set of laws once in a while to see if something is conflicting and must be brought to the ruler.

Then there are the other advisors who are namely the High Advisors of Dalaria, and are meant to give advice to the High King of Dalaria, but in fact, they are advisory to the Royal Advisor, who must then bring anything important to the ruler. So in fact, the Royal Advisor has much more power than the ruler him-/herself. This has been a problem in the past, and even though no wars have taken place because of it, a revolution happened a long time before the FHYD, when a Royal Advisor ordered the execution of the then-current ruler. However, as progression is quite limited in the first class, he didn't get the title of High King of Dalaria, so his attempt to gain more power was pointless.

The holidays of Ashera are held dear, and quite often there are festivals going on on the planet. Dalaria is the most visited city of the planet because of that. The only official, national holidays are New Year's Eve (Ni'Vua Ve) and New Year's Day (Ni'Vua De) which take place on the year's last and the next year's first day, The Holy God's Day (Hél'Ve De) which is celebrated in spring, Unification Day (Unia'Re Publique'De) celebrated in summer, Grand Come-Together (Gran'ko Tervé) celebrated in the end of autumn, and Wintery Warmth Day (Wintere'Soe De) in winter.

New Year's Eve is a calm day on the planet which, depending on location, is full of snow and darkness. That's the day when the new year's arrival is celebrated. Normally, about an hour before the end of the year, all people get outside and hold hands, forming an united mass of people. Then the regional kings or queens have their speeches which are televised so that all people living in the region could see and hear it. The speech is typically half an hour long and then, when all regional speeches are over, the Royal Advisor, High Queen of Dalaria, and Grand Bishop of Dalaria have their own speech, which they perform together, and is televised to the whole planet. Typically the speech ends a minute before the new year with the Grand Bishop's blessing for the next year. When the new year begins, thousands, even millions of flying lanterns are released on the planet. As the planet follows only one timezone, it all takes place at the same time.

The next day, which is New Year's Day, is not a calm day at all. Nearly all people visit churches and spend time together with others, enjoying the day. As opposed to the previous day when the daytime was calm and night was quite active, the daytime of New Year's Day is active and night is calm. Burning candles on that night is quite common, and when walking through the streets at night, nearly all windows are full of burning candles. It has been described as quite a magical scene.

Months pass, and the next national holiday is The Holy God's Day, which is celebrated just with going to the church. All people go to church. Quite... simple.

Unification Day is the day which is celebrated to remember the remarkable day when all former nations of the planet came together to form the Kingdom of Asherian Systems. Even though it's ironic because Ashera is the only planet in the system which supports life. This day is celebrated just like the New Year's Eve, with coming together and holding hands, but this time, it's done during daytime. Games are played together with complete strangers, competitions are held, and everybody is placed in one of the various, countless teams, full of complete strangers. Every team has to gather points and in the end of the day, the team which got the most points wins and gets a prize. But most likely every person ends the day with the knowledge that they have made new friends.

The Grand Come-Together is done on a cold autumn night. All around the grasslands or otherwise empty lands, campfires are started and people just sit around them, talking stories, remembering what it feels like to suffer from the coldness of being alone (the cold air temperatures symbolize that). Even though it's typically quite cold on that night, it's mandatory to participate, except when you're in a hospital for example, but the High Kings have spoken that the goal of the event is to give your warmth to others via coming together and forming a bond around the fire. The fire also holds an important meaning to the event as it is supposed to make people come as close to it as possible, not even leaving any personal space for other people. Thus, people would have to be together if they want to get warmth.

But another cold day, a traditional celebration is the Wintery Warmth Day, when people spend time with their family, in their homes or with other people who want to celebrate the day with others. The day is really calm, and is supposed to represent the peaceful nature and kindness of the people of Ashera. Exceptionally good meals are made for the dinner, and people sit together behind the table, not leaving before the day ends. One is not supposed to eat all the time though. Behind the table, gifts are also given to the other people behind the table, as it's a tradition.

During the year, many minor festivals and events take place, but they are not nationally or traditionally that important. There are events of music, events of eating, events of art, of sports, and whatever else there could be.

All arts are really important for the planet. As it is a culturally advanced planet, people's everyday life is even defined by arts and culture. The most respected type of art is the art of buildings, or otherwise known as architecture. Even the simplest houses are supposed to be architecturally beautiful and lovely to see. Golden ornaments are often used, and staircases are really popular, even if they're not needed. The structure with the best look would be the Palace of Dalaria, which is the official residence of the ruler.

All other types of arts are also heavily respected, especially when they're dealing with the religion. All art of religion is considered sacred and is meant to be a gift for their supreme, titular ruler, the God.

Literature is also really important to the people of Ashera, as they love expressing themselves, and those who can't paint or make music often choose the path of either acting or writing. And writing is the most popular choice. Libraries are often full of books, and there are always problems with them. Most of the times though, the regional rulers manage to clear things up a bit. However, the national library located in the capital city, Dalaria, is a grand building which never seems to get full of books, even though it looks like it's already full.

The Ashian language is now used only on traditional occasions, as there are so many tourists and immigrants. But the language itself is quite similar to the Galactic Basic Standard, as it can be seen that most words are kind of related to their Galactic Basic counterparts, and are sometimes even the exact same. There are some rules, though. There are no articles in Ashian, and the first two words of a sentence are always connected with an aphostrophe and the word after aphostrophe also begins with a capital letter. It takes some time to understand the language and learn the vocabulary, but mainly the grammar is similar to Galactic Basic, so it's not too difficult. For an example, the sentence "A bird flew over the river and landed on a tree" in Ashian would be "Bi'Fél O'e Riverrieuqe énd el'Là tréq."

Like already mentioned, religion is very important to Asheriane. Their own holy bible-equivalent would be "Hél'Ble" which guides them on their road of getting a blessing from the God. But in fact, the God they speak of is the Force and the blessing is actually Force-sensitivity. Even though one can't become a Force-sensitive but must be born as one, they believe it's possible and are really obsessed with getting the blessing. The second class rank progression could be also considered equivalent to the standard Force ranking system:
- Apprentice - Blessed
- Knight - Priest
- Master - Bishop
Then there are higher ranking bishops, too, but they are not just the ones who are in charge of just one cathedral, but a bunch of cathedrals, ruling from a High Cathedral. Some would consider these Bishops equivalent to the Jedi High Councilors for example. And the rank equivalent to the Dark Lord of the Sith or Jedi Grandmaster or any other such rank is the Grand Bishop of Dalaria.

Turning a little back to the government, one must say even though political rights are nearly on-existent, civil rights are excellent. People have many rights and much freedom, and thus they themselves have described their society as the society of freedom, or of happiness. Because they believe freedom is directly related to happiness.

Now, the foods people love to eat. Their foods are actually quite similar to galactic standards. For example, they eat a lot of meat and vegetables, fruit, have kind of the same drinks the rest of the galaxy has, and are in general much like other planets. However, there are some traditional plates. For example, one would be the "Pé'Sup Magnifii", which is a soup of peas, beans, and a lot of other vegetables. Another traditional food is "Bànt'Mé Vin", a bantha meat steak with wine.

Everyday life on the planet is simple, people wake up in the morning, typically between 7-9 o'clock, and then the most typical jobs take seven hours of person's free time away. So the most common work times are from 10 am to 5 pm. Schooltime is typically a bit less than that, from 10 am to 3 pm. After work, people do various things, but mostly just rest a bit and do homeworks. Then there is the free time which some use for making art, some for their hobbies, some play with their children, etc.

Talking about school, one thing must be made clear: a child goes to school when they're seven years old, and go to the "Bàs'Sko" until they're 16. Then they can either go studying for a certain job in the "J'Sko" or can continue the academic line in "Gimna'Sko". Then the next step would be "Univértae Skolente". In the J'Sko and Gimna'Sko, children study for three years, and then they can go to the Univértae Skolente, which varies from six to ten years of studying.

Another thing which should be addressed is military. Every regional ruler has their own army and maybe even navy and air forces, but the most powerful army is in the hands of Dalaria. While the planetary armies are more cultural, wearing traditional armours and not using blasters or anything like that, the Dalarian army truly consists of modern forces, and has great starships. Dalaria is the only region on the planet to have such a military force. This military is not limited to Dalaria though, but they defend the whole planet. Planetary wars may be handled by them if the High King/Queen of Dalaria desires to do that, but typically they're not involved in their own civil wars.

A thing which has been mentioned already is the time zone problem. The whole planet uses the same timezone, but things are a little bit complicated. Days, weeks, months, years, etc. end at the exact same time for the whole planet, but that doesn't mean the whole planet acts like the timezones tell them to, but instead, every region follows the sun time. So it may happen that even though the planetary time is, let's say, 2 am, many people wake up and go to work. Or maybe at that time, they finish their 7 hour worktime.

So days, weeks, months, and so on are determined by the sole timezone which follows the time of Dalaria, but every region is free to live according to the times sun rises and sets in their own home city/region.

Heading back to religion, there are also minor sects which, not like the main religion, don't use the Light Side of the Force, but are either completely neutral or even Darksided. They are typically living in not so known areas as forests, mountains, or even underground. Their religion is mainly the same, but they believe the God is utterly evil and so should be all people. Neutral ones are just the ones who don't want to take sides in the war between good and evil.

Technology: A mix of traditional and galactic standard technology - for cultural reasons, speeders and cars and such are not used and architecture is quite ancient-looking, but modern weapons, machines, transport are used by the Dalarian military. Everyday items are typically modern.

General behaviour: In general, Asherians are a lot like humans, but they have become a lot calmer, peaceful in nature, pacifistic, utopistic, civilised, philosophical, and diplomatic. They see life as a lovely thing and don't desire to be who they aren't or who they can't be. Even though history has shown that this species has formerly been even a bit warmongering and ambitious, now they are no longer like that. Their friendly and caring nature, however, doesn't mean some of these Asherians can't disobey the law.

Asherians are quite hostile when it comes to religion, though. They don't accept religion freedom, but want everybody to follow the same faith. This puts everybody who interacts with Asherians in danger. When somebody expresses their own faith near them, Asherians get really furious and aggressive.

History:
The exact beginning of the planet couldn't be told by anybody and it is not too important, either. The more important is the beginning of civilisation. Civilisation on the planet begun at the end of the Hutt Empire era, probably in 24,703 BBY, and started rapidly growing until approximately 11,000 BBY. Why was it so isn't sure, but a theory says the war which started then on the planet and lasted for many-many years didn't let the civilisation advance anymore culturally or scientifically.

So some time at 11,000 BBY, quite a long time of wars started on the planet of Ashera, when many regions fought against each other, forming alliances and then breaking them. The reason behind the wars was religion, because at that time, many of them roamed around the planet of Asherians. Many died, civilisation was on the brink of complete fall. But then the war ended, just as suddenly as it had begun, in the year 10,538 BBY. However, this date doesn't indicate signing a peace treaty, but the end of war activity. Because no treaties were actually signed and technically the war is still going on, even though none of the nations which existed then are no more.

It took years before civilisation could become again what it was once before the war started, and even then it was totally different from what the planet used to have before. By the year 8,056, civilisation was again what it used to be with a few changes. Many nations were no longer and were not able to provide any aid towards becoming the utopia people wanted the planet to be, nor was their religion what it was before. The whole planet had taken on the religion of people of Dalansé, which meant they all started praying towards the same, sole God.

After years, in 7,234, the planet was united into one single country, the Kingdom of Asherian Systems, and the first constitution was made soon after all nations had signed a treaty which forms one single nation of Ashera. Even though the change wasn't very liked in the beginning, later people became used to such a way of living and didn't even miss the former times anymore.

Well, that until the civil war of 5,000 BBY broke the nation into four quarters. The High Queen of Dalansé was seen as a corrupted person and people didn't know what they could do to fix things. So about a quarter of regions started working towards destroying the High Queen. The remaining nation didn't know much about the plan until the year of 4,997 BBY, when the first attack on Dalansé took place. The second quarter then got out of the war and claimed independence. The third quarter, however, started fortifying their area, as they didn't know what to do. They knew the High Queen is corrupt and should be overthrown, but they thought the first quarter of regions was barbaristic. Thus, they remained as a part of the country, but didn't choose sides on this war. It was all between the first and fourth quarters.

The war was a disaster, being even deadlier and more powerful than the previous war, in less time. Even though the High Queen died soon, the war lasted for about a hundred years because of the first quarter's desire to destroy the "corrupt region" of Dalansé. With the help of the second quarter who rejoined the country after fifty years of war, the capital city was destroyed, only one bulding left behind in the city.

All four quarters then came together to discuss things, even though the hostility between the first and fourth quarters was still high, and they weren't willing to be diplomatic with such warmongers. But the discussion ended with yet another treaty of making the second quarter's main region of Dalaria the capital, and making women the minority. Gender-neutral society was no more.

Years passed without serious incidents. It's not documented when immigrants started moving to the planet, but it was supposedly before the most recent war. With them, the civilisation grow to be one of the greatest, and culture was on its rise. And then came the Gulag Plague. The virus was a disaster on the planet, many died. And it nearly broke the so powerful civilisation apart again. But the Four Hundred Year Darkness passed and the inhabitants of the planet seemed to have developed an immunity to the virus, just like most, if not all other people.

Then new cultural and societal standards were made on a democratic parliament which took place in Dalaria in year 835 ABY. All regions' leaders were there and together, they decided to make the planet gender-neutral again, and fix the constitution. The planet became a powerful theocratic monarchy with the absolute power being in the hands of the High King or Queen of Dalaria.

The planet has suffered a lot, but now it is on its rise again.

Notable PCs: N/A
Intent: To give a planet I am making a new native species and to have a new interesting, cultural, civilised species in the RPG.
 

HK-36

The Iron Lord Protector (Neutral Good)
[member="Maria Natalja"]

Greetings! I will be your judge for the evening.

To begin with, tell me more of their innate Force Sense abilities. Is it just Force Sense or does it spill into other sub-categories as the Force Sight or Precognition? Would Masters of the skill in their culture be able to detect hidden or cloaked beings other Force Users would not? Would rare few of the Asherians finally stick it to those White-Current Users :3 ?

Also, elaborate on their Weakened Immunity weakness. Would a simple cut leave an infection? Would they have to wear suits like the Quarrians in Mass Effect to avoid getting every wound turning gangrenous? Would gasses and other chemical attacks like that have greater effects on them or side-effects? Does visiting alien planets provides problem for them as they can encounter viruses and bacteria absent from their home planet?

For Alter Powers, define what they are in the sub and give some examples. As always, elaborate, please :p

And finally, in Weak, are their bones easier to break than those of humans and would they do worse in higher gravity or colder environments? Since skinnier built would usually mean thinner layer of fat for insulation of the body tissue.

Address those questions and tag me in when you're done
 
[member="HK-36"]

So clarification time it is.

HK-36 said:
To begin with, tell me more of their innate Force Sense abilities. Is it just Force Sense or does it spill into other sub-categories as the Force Sight or Precognition? Would Masters of the skill in their culture be able to detect hidden or cloaked beings other Force Users would not? Would rare few of the Asherians finally stick it to those White-Current Users :3 ?
All Sense abilities, so Force Sight and Precognition, along with everything else which goes with Force Sense. Only like... high-tier Masters, not the one who just got Master. It would take special training to learn such powers, but doesn't require as much effort as humans would need to learn anything like that. Maybe only the rare few, only historically known exceptional Force users, I would say.


HK-36 said:
Also, elaborate on their Weakened Immunity weakness. Would a simple cut leave an infection? Would they have to wear suits like the Quarrians in Mass Effect to avoid getting every wound turning gangrenous? Would gasses and other chemical attacks like that have greater effects on them or side-effects? Does visiting alien planets provides problem for them as they can encounter viruses and bacteria absent from their home planet?
A simple cut leave an infection - rare, but happens to the weakest ones. No special suits or anything are needed, but chemical weapons would truly have greater effects on them, depending on the chemical, maybe even side effects. Alien planets with new viruses and bacteria would cause problems as in many cases, an Asherian would have to be supervised by doctors or given special treatment in any other way. However, that happens only on the planets which have a really different set of bacteria.


HK-36 said:
For Alter Powers, define what they are in the sub and give some examples. As always, elaborate, please
Alter powers are the Force powers which alter environment, such as Telekinesis, Force Jump, Force Lightning, and so on. More information could be find here.


HK-36 said:
And finally, in Weak, are their bones easier to break than those of humans and would they do worse in higher gravity or colder environments? Since skinnier built would usually mean thinner layer of fat for insulation of the body tissue.
Basically I would say all what you mentioned. Yes, none of them would be extreme, but all of them would be present.

By the way, I must say your work as a judge is done well. Good job! :)
 

HK-36

The Iron Lord Protector (Neutral Good)
[member="Maria Natalja"]
Sorry for the wait, Invasion and RL things had me distracted :p
Now let's get down to business to defeat the Huns,

For Force Sense I would like you to put in a mention on how and if an elder Asherian seer master would work against the White Current? Would they be able to stick it to them or not so much? :3

And I did noticed some spelling and grammatical errors in your sub, especially in the longer Culture and History sections. So what I would want you to do is read over the whole thing and correct any mistakes you could find.

And thanks :p The key is the innate love of making others suffer and doing work :3

Tag me in when you'll address the concerns above
 

Lex-El

An Honest Man
[member="Maria Natalja"] Are you still wanting to work on this? I need a status update and I need to see if you made the edits HK asked for.
 

HK-36

The Iron Lord Protector (Neutral Good)
[member="Maria Natalja"], @[member="Cade Lee"]

It's alright, I'm back from my sudden LOA,

I shall continue judging this submission since I was the initial judge to handle it,

Although it's pretty much done from what I can tell, but once Maria makes the edits I will read over it one more time to make sure everything is premium.
 
[member="HK-36"]

So. I have mentioned the White Current a bit more in the Strengths section. I hope that's what you wanted me to describe.

Anyways, I have tried to fix the spelling and grammar errors in the submission. I am not sure if I managed to get rid of all of them, but the fixes I made were the most I could do. Sorry for not checking my submission's text before submitting it. I will remember to do that next time. :)
 

HK-36

The Iron Lord Protector (Neutral Good)
[member="Maria Natalja"]

It's alright, it happens to me as well, in pretty much every sub of mine Illias has judged he asked me to correct the grammatical errors, as I take more time writing a sub the less attention I pay whether or not what I wrote was correct grammar wise, and as much as I focus on submissions making sense and being balanced, I'm trying to look out for spelling in them as well.

Anyway, the edit is looking good, one last thing I would ask for it is for you to define who would be considered "The most powerful masters of the Asherian kind" what I'm looking for is approximate time they would spend studying the arts, if they would hold any specific position in Asherian castes like High Bishops or would it be just the Grand Bishop of Dalaria, and perhaps come up with a series of tests, trials, or challenges they would have to overcome to really master their craft? I would really like to see something like that but I would understand if it would be too much.

The point of this is that the White Current is a very rare and very powerful art, something that would counter it would also be a very rare and very powerful art, so I would ask for those specifications to make sure that if somebody would play an Asherian they wouldn't just go "Yeah I can see through White Current now" as soon as they hit Master rank, I would prefer for them to hit Master rank and then do a series of threads (that's where the challenges would come in) to reach that powerful, powerful level. Hopefully that would minimize any potential abuse that would come with it.
 

HK-36

The Iron Lord Protector (Neutral Good)
[member="Maria Natalja"],
That's perfect,

Wonderful sub, well thought-out and fluffier than an air-dried Ropo,
I hereby give this submission my blessings,
Pending Secondary Approval.

Thank you for your cooperation and patience, have fun with the sub,
And don't forget to tip your waitresses Ashin, Kara, Valeria, and Thurionia.
 
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