A Wrinkle in Time

[Hailyn]

Days, nowadays, ran together. Time soared and years passed nearly as quickly as months did. She didn't quite understand it, she didn't think anyone else was perceiving it as she was either. Marriage, children, it all happened so fast and now it seemed like she was already reaching a point where she wouldn't even have her two beautiful children to keep her youth. She no longer cared about the galaxy at large, and she'd retreated from public eye - her seemingly temporary role as the Empress of Teta slipping away from the grasp of the Tetans, who now believed her to have become a recluse. But her children, her two most important and beloved gifts, and her loving husband were all that remained on her mind. These days she didn't think of her future, and rarely looked back on her tumultuous past to ponder on what could have been. Rather, she was now writing a very important document in the instance that a certain event were to transpire, whether it be of the dark sort of something more vague.

Glancing down at the piece of parchment, the first piece of paper she'd written on since she was nearly as old as the girls were, she wondered just how much she should write. She'd never really looked into what a will was needed for, she simply assumed all of her belongings would go to her children, but then she realized they had two of them - and she wasn't so certain if the government controlling her planetary one would be so fond of her after her essentially disappearing from their ranks. With a modest degree of annoyance, she began to write.

 

[Hailyn]

Two children, two children that would have both everything and nothing. Just as she would. They were her whole world now, grown up or not, and she couldn't stand to think of going away. So torn inside, fluttering feelings throughout her insides every time she looked down and started to touch the pen to paper, she could only imagine how the girls would feel when they were told. A surprise, a cruel one, but it was the only way she would be able to go away without them following them. It was time for her and Mister Wonderful to go away for a time, perhaps forever, and the twins had everything ahead of them - she couldn't take that away from them, like she had Lisette. She told Alric she would tell them, talk to them, to make them understand, but conversation had never been part of her strong suit. Those mushy feelings and sappy crying moments were best to come by naturally without thinking, she wouldn't even know where to begin.

'Hello, Rose, Lily, darlings, it seems your father and I are going away - forever - and we want you to behave, here are the things we wish to pass on to you, please be well.' The whole subject seemed ridiculous when she thought about it, if only it could be easier. So here she was, bent over a desk with pen in hand trying to think of a way to write out their last will and testament in order to completely disappear, for good. She, of course, would leave them something behind, a holocron for Rose, the little girl that always seemed to follow her around, and perhaps leave a little hint or message to say they were still alright.

 

[Hailyn]

She swallowed, realizing she couldn't simply leave something so precious for Rose and leave out Lily, but there simply wasn't a spark in her to go out of her way to leave so many things behind for the two of them - it would be give and take here, a family heirloom for one, a trinket for another, maybe a lightsaber too. It sounded unfair, and it was - it was the first thought that entered her head when she arrived home with the twins and Alric. She'd set out to forge an heirloom for their child, whom she naturally believed would be a son - fething lucky huh? But as these rather frustrating thoughts stormed about in her head, a fleeting memory of something she'd been working on since she was a teen forced its way to the forefront of her thoughts. So long ago, back when she had first discovered she had a sister - years ago - she had created a datacron, used as a diary of sorts, and almost every day she'd spoken aloud to it to recount her day or night, or even a recap of the whole month.

She'd certainly stopped using it as often after the twins were born, those energetic tykes had taken a liking to taking up all of her time. She had, however, made sure to keep up her habit of depositing thoughts and musings into it every few weeks, just the night before actually, and while a personal holocron to her youngest was certainly priceless as an heirloom, she would leave something exceedingly personal to her oldest, to Lily. She knew how that teen brooded over everything, perhaps it would help her calm as her own voice had during Lily's infancy. A smile touched at the corner of her mouth, a memory of the first time she'd called her daughter by her full name, middle name included, and that annoyed expression - such distaste for a word that simply meant cherry. "Lily Kirsche Kuhn, a diary for you." She whispered, jotting down a note - looking towards another sheet now that she'd began to use this one as an outline for the final copy.

 

[Hailyn]

It felt like hours had gone by now, and on a whim she walked away from the desk towards her night stand, taking a moment to look around at what would be one of her final memories of this home. Alric was away, perhaps signing away his company and his name to Rose, a girl who stubbornly seemed to refuse to see her father as a father and more like a man that told her what to do. It was rather cute, really, but she would miss what would come after their teens flew by, always worried that her little flowers would not find someone as open and caring as their father had been with her. A sigh was let out, and part of her wondered if this was the right thing - if there ever was a right thing. Leaning over, her hand grasping a small black pyramid, which glowed to the touch. Walking back over to the desk, looking over her notes as she switched on the device through the force - a skill with the little device she'd learned over the years of being out of reach.

"Archive one, place current recording at first slot, displace remaining entries." She said, answered only by a slight glimmering of red from within. "Lily Kirsche Kuhn, if you are hearing this - no, that isn't right at all. You are hearing this because this is my passing gift to you. It is not a holocron, nor does it contain any illustrious secrets - though I have left you a few other trinkets to keep my memory with you, besides this toy. This is my personal datacron, as I'm sure you've guessed. Perhaps you expect this to be a short, simple, series of entries dedicated to you about how sorry I am, or how I really don't mean to sound so old and uncaring whenever I answer your equally sarcastic questions, young lady, but this is a recording of everything I have went through since I was just a little older than you." Silara explained, forcing herself to remain calm despite the tightness in her throat.

 

[Hailyn]

"I feel as though I should have prefaced this with an introduction, uhm, something along the lines of, 'This is the datacron of Silara, something something, mother of Lily', but that whole thing of formality and being all stiff is starting to really ruffle my feathers, you know, Lily dear? Yes, I know, no little quip from you this time, Cheri, and yes, I know how much you hate to hear me call you by your middle name, but if you recall your father can't help himself to spending some time with his little Kirsche. This will, in a way, be my last words directly to you, for your ears only, and I'm sorry that this is how I've done it, but I'm.. Well I have no real excuse, this is a horrible way for a mother to treat her daughter, no matter the reasons. I love you, my water-lily, and I know how much you envy your sister - perhaps as much as I envy your father for having such a beautiful, smart, little girl to adore him." She continued, her ramblings becoming slow, almost deliberate, as though she were holding back tears.

She paused, for quite some time actually. A bit of sniffing and a sigh here and there. Perhaps the old lady, as old as one could be to have a grown up little girl eleven years post-forty, was really a bit sad about something, maybe she'd wanted to connect with the elder twin, maybe there was a bit of regret there. This certainly was harder for her than the holocron, knowing that Lily would never get to be greeted by her face, that there would be no extension of herself, of a piece of her consciousness to be left to chat with, to cry to. She would only hear the voice of a memory, one that would never be able to hear her woes, of boys that she wanted, dates she was left on, or how hard the world was in general. Perhaps it was for this reason she felt so guilty over the gift for her husband's biggest fan.

 

[Hailyn]

Another sigh escaped her lips and she leaned into the desk, her head buried in her hands, eyes closed shut. "Force, this is killing me.." She muttered, her voice still recorded silently into the device. "I wish I could be here for you, Lily, and I know how downright stupid I sound when I say this is the best, the absolute best, for you two. I love you, I love you both, and I cannot bear the thought of how much this must hurt you for me to just leave like this. You were the gem I had always wanted, the flower named by your father so many years ago.. I know I haven't.. I haven't been the best mother, that I haven't always been there for you, and had I known.. If I had expected this to come up, I would have given you every moment of my life from birth until the moment we were to go our separate ways, so that you would have known just how special you are to me, my delicate little flower." The words seemed to ebb and flow from her, her head spinning as the thoughts just poured out as they came into being. What she was saying didn't feel right, but it was beyond important that this one-sided talk with her daughter included pouring every last ounce of her into it.

"Promise me, promise me you will come to me, to this, every night, whenever you are feeling alone, or you just wish to share. There is enough room on this for your entire life to be etched into history, tell me everything, down to the very last memory you have in forty years from now, looking back at this moment in the same pair of eyes I am now. I wish I could be there for you, for your wedding, for your children, grandchildren, and no amount of apologizing will make this better, as a mother to her daughter, her children, this is unforgivable, and I won't hold it against you if you feel angry with me." She said, advising her child via recording of how to make use of the device - not that it was all that complex, it really wasn't. She wasn't too sure how well this gift would be received, though she assumed it would eventually come to bear some sentimental value.

 

[Hailyn]

"I will leave you several things that I believe are important for the oldest, I have personally crafted you a lightsaber that has never been used, and the moment you have it, if you ever end up going down a path using the force, meditate on it and it will be yours and yours alone. I will have also left you to be the heir to Empress Teta's well-being, but if you feel that isn't something you want to pursue, you may pass it off to someone else - just let the Sith or whoever deal with it. You and your sister, from what was discussed between your father and I, will be sharing ownership of both Titan and Koros. These are serious responsibilities, and though I know you two are not us, we ask that you respect that what you two do with them may effect trillions of others across the galaxy." She said as she rambled on. It seemed more like a lecture now than a goodbye, but she assumed she always must have sounded that way to her children. Always matter-of-fact after some point, doting, motherly, all that jazz.

For a while she wondered, thinking back she chuckled. Had she ever told the two of them, directly that is, that she had been a Sith Lord in employment of the One Sith? Did she want to? The idea of her daughters, either of them, rushing into combat as she had was horrifying, and she wanted to give them the choice themselves as to whether it was or was not a good idea - but there was no way in hell she was going to leave it up to imagination's sake, or for some Sith has-been to try to seduce her children to the dark side simply by bending the truth and trying to convince them that it was what she wanted. "Alright, Lily, it is almost time for me to say goodbye, I do have to write out this will so both of you get your things after all, but I need to give you a bit of a perspective on my less-than-glamorous past." She began, swallowing hard as she tried to plan out her method of attack on this subject - she knew there were things she might say that may convince Lily not to venture into the One Sith, whereas if she let her sibling listen in she might become ambitious like her mother and try to live out her mother's past as some attempt to get closer to her.

 

[Hailyn]

"It might come to you as a surprise, but you probably didn't know much about me, aside from whatever fanciful stories your father has told you. Once upon a time there was a horrible, terrible, tyrant of a woman who went by the name of Darth Vitium, a Sith Lord that fed off of her foes' vices. She went head-long into combat with two Jedi Masters at once, not only fending herself from their strikes but pushing the two back. And for a time she was the young voice of the Dark Lord of the One Sith, the very government we now - you now, rather - live under. I was that woman. I would prefer you not think of me as a Sith lord still, I'm not sure if after all these years I could even lift a lightsaber the same way I had when I was your age, nor do I think I could muster much of the power behind the Sith magic that I once reigned down on the Republic and its allies." She continued, trying to search her thoughts for how to continue.

"I would prefer your last memory be of a mother that only wanted her children's attention and love, who loved them unconditionally. Maybe I was a bit harsh now and again, perhaps a bit strict, but I have always loved you, both of you. I know you will probably mention this to Rose in some way, though she will be getting her own message - albiet in a different way, but please remember this is your own private collection of my memoirs. Rose might have gotten all of my attention, but you never forgotten, and you never will be. I love you both, I wish you good luck and good fortune." Silara explained, her trying to get the point across that her 'favorite', Rose, was certainly not as favored as it seemed. As with any parent with two children that wanted nothing more than to shower their children with praise, when one was less receptive than the other it built up and began to appear as though the two were constantly weighed against the other.

 

[Hailyn]

After a brief pause she shut off the datacron and leaned back in her chair. She and her husband had been all but a distant memory for the public in general up until recently, when it was announced over the holonet that both she and her husband had died in an assassination attempt on her husband. Regardless of the accuracy the report held, which there was none of, she simply let the news be presumed true by the galaxy at large - it made her slipping away from the public and even those in her private life that much easier for her and Alric. But the subject of her will was still not yet completed, not while she had yet to address what would happen to the company she ran. For a moment she pondered giving the company to one or the other child, but after much thought given - she honestly did not feel that it would be right to give just one child so much responsibility, especially not when it was one thing the two of them together were quite good with - she decided to grant joint ownership, with equal rights, to both of her children. 'At least this way they can push each other into being more production, maybe even be competitive about it.' She thought, not too concerned as to whether the business itself would be fine or not.

She let out a quiet sigh and jotted down a few notes further, wondering how successful her children would be in business - something their father excelled at, whereas she seemed to stagger behind like a disinterested party in the shadow of someone much greater. Part of her expected Rose to do better out of the two - she was much more diligent compared to the more lazed twin, Lily. She'd contemplated having a ship built for the two of them, a personal craft to be piloted by a chauffeur to travel in, but had abandoned such ideas when she came to the conclusion that it would be for the best if they were forced to work for their own goals at some point - at least in the beginning of their lives. While she was gone the two of them would certainly remain in a luxurious frame of mind, likely retaining whatever inheritance their father had left for them - money she knew she couldn't afford on her own, though she supposed it was the purpose of marriage after all - and complete ownership over the company that quite literally owned, or at least ran, Empress Teta.

 

[Hailyn]

The sound of a door in the distance, likely the front, was both a warning and a sign that her time with the twins was coming to a close. She'd left them various things, trinkets, toys, equipment, and even a company that would require their attention at almost all times of the day, but in the end she knew it wasn't quite the same as being there for them. For a moment she wished to simply toss away the will, to stay, but she recalled the conversation with Alric, his insistence that they be left alone. He was right, after all, the children remained safe, to an extent, while she and Alric were considered dead and gone. They would learn values they wouldn't have with them, too, and she was certain that it would most definitely bring out their strengths and force them to address their faults as they grew in a more obvious fashion than living a sheltered life. She brought her right hand up from the table, palm towards her lips, and made a symbolic gesture of love towards the twins - one they would never see or likely learn of - and kissed her palm and touched it to the list. As insignificant, as feeble, as it was, it was really the only thing she could do now, other than leave.

Several minutes passed and the door opened, a curious Lily peering in her mother's room with a bag slung over her shoulder. She'd heard the news that her parents had died, although she knew it couldn't have been true - she'd been with them only hours before the information had been spread over the holonet and blown up over Sith space. A bounty had even been placed by the man her father had replaced in the company he had owned for the possessions he claimed were his - possessions she knew belonged to her father. A note, beside her mother's mysterious little datacron, was left with a hastily scribbled message in her mother's handwriting. As curious as she had been when she had came home, she walked in to her parent's room without much thought and lifted up the note to read it. A brow was raised followed by a sharp intake of air, a gasp. For the most brief of moments she could feel the anger, the depression, and confusion settle in all at once. Tears stung at her cheeks as she sat down in the chair her mother had often before her, her left hand snaking out to turn on the device that was situated before her. "Lily Kirsche Kuhn, if you are.." The words came at her like an electric shock. She absorbed the information spewed at her like a sponge, entirely in disbelief. Tears had continued to run down her face, ruining her makeup, and while she leaned back she let out a breath of air that she hadn't realized she'd been holding in. Just an hour or two ago she had been on her way home from a friend's house with Rose, a regular day, and the next moment she was at home, seemingly abandoned with her oblivious sister, and as she looked down at the miniature datapad at her wrist everything seemed to fall apart.

'Rent's? Dead.
Friends? Dead.

A comfy, cozy, easy life was suddenly much, much, harder.