Private A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to a Tourist Trap

[Ala Quin]

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Wearing
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There were few things in life that Ala found as amusing as Tourist Traps. There was this way that they represented the planet they were showcasing. It was never quite the real thing. Ala made sure she saw the real thing, and it was always more beautiful in all its flaws and fineries. But the Tourist Traps held their own unique beauty. Some family had found a way to bring joy and fun into the lives of travelers, and making an honest credit to boot. She saw it as part of an acceptable culture. Toutists want the polished version, tourists get the polished version.

Ala had been sitting in a public transit speeder with a dozen or so others when an explosion rocked the vehicle and sent the front of the speeder digging into the ground of the vast prairie they had been traversing. She had been on her way to see a fully automated grain farm in action. She had been excited about it. But alas! She was only briefly aware of the danger they all faced, when she unbuckled herself to look out the window, saw the incoming projectile and turned to cry out...instead...she was thrown about the moving vessel and knocked unconcious.

When she awoke, Ala found herself in a makeshift cell, more a parlour, with wooden pillars leading up to chunky wooden rafters, and what looked like a stucco styled ceiling. Her eyes took a while to adjust, the blurriness subsiding. Her first instinct was to reach for her lightsaber.

Blasted fragnabbits.

It was gone. It was GONE. The loaner lightsaber that Caltin had given her was gone. That hurt worse than the pounding headache she had.

Sitting up, she found herself instinctually rubbing her temple while surveying her surrounds. She could hear some muttering from beyond about 'the price they could fetch for a Jedi' and the curse filled response about 'the trouble that they could get in because of the Jedi'. Ala smirked, but winced when she did. Apparently, her jaw hurt too.

She stood, wobbed for a moment, and caught her balance on a barrel...which was empty and threatened to topple over sending her along with it. Reaching out through the Force, she caught her balance, and some semblence of control began to be restored. The Force. Flowing through her again. She could breath. Think. She could...be.

Reaching out she sensed a lot of fear and apprehension among the cartel that had nabbed her. She was sure from the individuals present that there were some weak willed among them and that she could be able to Mind Trick her way out. But she came for a tourist trap, and this was a pretty decent imitation of a trap. Still. She worried about the other passengers on the speeder transport. They did not seem to be present with her. Maybe they had been taken somewhere else? Maybe they were dead? Whatever had become of them, they were currently out of Ala's purview. She would wait.

******​

Some hours later, the wooden door opened, and a Twi'lek in cuffs was shoved into the room with Ala. The Jedi Knight was practicing to see how long she could hang from her legs, upside down from the rafters. Her stiff jacket flopped slightly to the left and right, and her hair hung straight down towards the ground. Across her face was plastered a Cheshire type smile.

"Hi friend! Would you like to get out of here?"

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

Saija had taken a transport from Denon to the planet Froswythe. The lush, green farm planet was a stark contrast to the planetwide megalopolis of her home planet. The lack of noise and machinery and flying speeders everywhere took a little getting used to. Some people would find such a serene atmosphere relaxing. To the Twi'lek raised on the streets, it was unsettling.

Her contact had insisted she meetup here. She had to admit, a farm planet was one of the last places the Corpos or the Imps would be looking for a slicer, so she agreed to the rendezvous. Shortly after the exchange, however, she had attracted the attention of some local trouble. Alone and without any backup, Saija was quickly subdued and taken captive. Not a situation she hadn't been in before, a minor inconvenience at worst. After cuffing her wrists with a set of binders, the mysterious assailants dragged Saija to a makeshift holding area and roughly push her inside.

Some hours later, the wooden door opened, and a Twi'lek in cuffs was shoved into the room with Ala. The Jedi Knight was practicing to see how long she could hang from her legs, upside down from the rafters. Her stiff jacket flopped slightly to the left and right, and her hair hung straight down towards the ground. Across her face was plastered a Cheshire type smile.

"Hi friend! Would you like to get out of here?"

Saija craned her neck up at the unusual sight. Her finger gestures to the floor, then upwards. "How did you...?"

Dropping that line of questioning, she says back "Yes, I didn't plan on sticking around."

That's when you see her move her tounge inside her cheek, then she slowly spits out a small sliver of metal from between her lips. She raises her cuffed hands to her face and using her mouth, she quickly undoes one of the binders then uses her free hand to undo the other. The entire process takes less than three seconds and the bindings clatter to the deck.

Still holding the small pick, the crafty Twi'lek gestures while saying "Come on down here, friend, so I can pop those off."

 

[Ala Quin]

The young Jedi's eyes grew wide, even as blood rushed to her head a little more and her face grew redder. "Neat trick!" She said with a grin, "you could teach me how to do that right?"

With a quick swing of her arms, Ala gained enough circular momentum to release her legs and flip comfortably to the ground. Her deshevelled hair fell awkwardly across her face, leaving her elven ears poking out. This made her self-concious as always, so with a puff of breath she blew hair away from her face - ineffectively - before using her hands to correct matters, and hide her ears. Her smile talk on a brief awkwardness before returning to the comfortable glow.

"For now...if you could get me out of them," she said with outstretched hands, "I would be most obliged."

There were so many questions. And so much to do. Ala's mind raced a million parsecs a moment.

"Ah...soooooo...who are you? How did you get here? Can you get us out of here? How can you do it? Aaaaaand, can we please make sure no one gets hurt to badly when we do?" Said Ala, with only another million questions to go, but her cheeks growing redness indicated that she was probably being a little too 'much'.

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

The young Jedi's eyes grew wide, even as blood rushed to her head a little more and her face grew redder. "Neat trick!" She said with a grin, "you could teach me how to do that right?"

"Yeah, sure thing." I quip. "Maybe later."

"For now...if you could get me out of them," she said with outstretched hands, "I would be most obliged."

My newfound companion lifts her shackled wrists, but in a few moments her bonds are loosed just as easily as mine.

"Ah...soooooo...who are you? How did you get here? Can you get us out of here? How can you do it? Aaaaaand, can we please make sure no one gets hurt to badly when we do?" Said Ala, with only another million questions to go, but her cheeks growing redness indicated that she was probably being a little too 'much'.

"Saija Kwann..." I reach out to shake. Then, I pause to think of an answer for her next question. "I was meeting a friend and got sidetracked. Yeah." From the tone in my voice it's pretty obvious I'm not about to let on.

"We're both going to have to work together to get out of here. I hope you can handle yourself in a fight. Don't worry, we don't have to kill anybody, just escape. But not without my hackbox, we'll need it to bypass one of the outer doors."

I rub my chin in thought, coming up with a plan. "We'll need to get one of the guards to open the door, then we can look for our gear after we take him out." I pause to see if you have any ideas of your own or more questions.

 

[Ala Quin]

It felt good to get the shackles off her wrist. Rubbing her wrists, Ala winced a little. They had been starting to hurt. "Good to meet you, Saija. My name is Ala...Ala Quin."

Saija's explanation as to how she got here was admittedly a little vague. The young Jedi Knight noted that she should probably watch out that Saija wasn't about some sort of ill deed herself. Just can't be too careful these days. Ala didn't detect anything aura wise yet though.

"I have something that I would like to recover as well. A metal cylinder thing," Ala said, thinking it best probably not to reveal her Jedi nature just yet, "aaaaand...I can fight if I have too...but I prefer to sneak."

A guard? Ala thought. I can sort that out!

Near bouncing over to the door, Ala knocked. The voices outside grew silent. She knocked again. No noise. Knocked again. "Yoohoo!" She sung out, "I'm ready to leave now and I will not stop knocking till you open this dooo...oooor."

Footsteps could be heard approaching the large wooden door. Ala grinned mischievously. Here they come.

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

"I have something that I would like to recover as well. A metal cylinder thing," Ala said, thinking it best probably not to reveal her Jedi nature just yet, "aaaaand...I can fight if I have too...but I prefer to sneak."

A guard? Ala thought. I can sort that out!

Near bouncing over to the door, Ala knocked. The voices outside grew silent. She knocked again. No noise. Knocked again. "Yoohoo!" She sung out, "I'm ready to leave now and I will not stop knocking till you open this dooo...oooor."

Footsteps could be heard approaching the large wooden door. Ala grinned mischievously. Here they come.

"Sure thing," Nodding to my new friend, I make sure to line up in front of the door a few feet back, so that I'm the first thing that he sees. I pull down the front zip of my jumpsuit as a distraction and arrange my head tails around my neck and shoulders.

Shortly after you begin making noise, one of the thugs comes bursting into the room.

"Make too much noise! Be quiet!" He roars menacingly.

"Hey big fella, you don't have to keep me in here. Maybe we can work something out." I part my head tails slightly to reveal my feminine assets while I wink suggestively.

The alien seems enticed for a moment until he realizes something is off. "Hey, what happen to binders?"

| Ala Quin |​

 

[Ala Quin]

So. Ala might have gotten a little distracted as well. Probably more so than the guard! A coy smile was cast in Saija's direction, as her mind flittered about and she felt her cheeks growing warmer and a tad redder. She knew Twi'leks had a reputation, but Saija really knew how to strike an alluring pose. The young Jedi was completely unaware of her own gawking, and just how silly she looked with her eyebrows raised and mouth dropping open.

"Hey, what happen to binders?"

The guards words ripped her attention away, and she was all at once embarrassed, bemused and feeling a sense of urgency.

Focus Ala. Focus. The guard...

She turned towards the guard who was standing immediately to her left, almost shoulder to shoulder with her...except for the disparity in height of course. Her hand waved a little, keeping it hidden from Saija's view. "You're not worried about the binders. You are just going to let us wander out the door, and then lock the door behind us."

A slight rigidity entered the guard's posture and he paused.

"I am not really worried about the binders. Hey, you just wander out the door...I will lock up."

Bouncing on her toes a bit, Ala added in haste. "And you'll kick the key under the door to us once it is locked!"

"And I'll kick the key under the to you once it is locked."

Ala rocked on her heels with a sense of satisfaction, before waving Saija towards the door.

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

"You're not worried about the binders. You are just going to let us wander out the door, and then lock the door behind us."

"I am not really worried about the binders. Hey, you just wander out the door...I will lock up."

Bouncing on her toes a bit, Ala added in haste. "And you'll kick the key under the door to us once it is locked!"

"And I'll kick the key under the to you once it is locked."

Ala rocked on her heels with a sense of satisfaction, before waving Saija towards the door.

I was expecting something more conventional, like knee-capping the sleemo or a swift kick to his pogees. This is unexpected, but she seems to have made the thug more than agreeable.

"~Hmmph~" My gaze at you narrows a bit as I zip my top back up with a lopsided smirk. I'm keeping my eye on the guard as I make my way to the door, then peek outside into the corridor. "All clear."

When you join up with me, I tell you, "There's a room that looked like a workshop on the lower level. I'm betting they're trying to get into my hackbox as we speak. Your cylinder thing might be down there too if they think it's worth anything."

 

[Ala Quin]

Ala's posture could only be described as rather casual when she wandered over to Saija's position. She stood just behind the Twi'lek, leaned over and followed her gaze, even when the Twi'lek looked elsewhere. "Workshop. Lower level...right," Ala said in a volume above a whisper and less than a yell...one might say, normal?

The hallway seemed clear, and as the Jedi reached out through the Force she noted no specific life signs on the floor, save Saija and their bungling captor. So, with that easing her less than stressed mind, she set out into the hallway and simply sauntered towards the door that hopefully was for the elevator. One look at the control panel told Ala that she was going to be no good here. She spun about, lent against the wall with her feet crossing one another. A simple nod of her head and quirk of her lip pointed towards the control panel.

"I suspect you are probably more good with unlocking these things than I am," she said with a shrug.

The guard in the room had clearly just realise what had happened to him, and he was now banging on the door from the inside. Ala's eyesbrows perked and she pushed from the wall.

"Yeah, I suck at this...so if you got the goods, Saija...now's the time!"

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

The hallway seemed clear, and as the Jedi reached out through the Force she noted no specific life signs on the floor, save Saija and their bungling captor. So, with that easing her less than stressed mind, she set out into the hallway and simply sauntered towards the door that hopefully was for the elevator. One look at the control panel told Ala that she was going to be no good here. She spun about, lent against the wall with her feet crossing one another. A simple nod of her head and quirk of her lip pointed towards the control panel.

"I suspect you are probably more good with unlocking these things than I am," she said with a shrug.

The guard in the room had clearly just realise what had happened to him, and he was now banging on the door from the inside. Ala's eyesbrows perked and she pushed from the wall.

"Yeah, I suck at this...so if you got the goods, Saija...now's the time!"

"In case you didn't notice, I don't have much in the way of tools."

The noise of the guard gets my attention now. "And we're about to have company."

There's only one option...I put the elevator into emergency stop mode, then jam my fingertips into the slats of the doors, prying them apart slightly. They're pretty heavy and I grunt with the effort to get them open. There's an access ladder next to the opening and looking down, I can see the liftcar a few decks down.

"Down the shaft...we'll take the lift from the inside after we get in through the roof." I slide into the open elevator shaft and begin climbing down to the car below.

 

[Ala Quin]

Rocking back on and forth on her feet, the young Jedi simply watched as Saija, the woman without tools, did more without tools than Ala would have thought to do. Ala would likely not have even had the strength to open the doors! With Saija giving her instructions, Ala simply nodded with a polite smile.

Saija was impressive. And no doubt about it, she was resourceful.

Stepping up to the edge of the elevator shaft, Ala peered down towards the lift. It wasn't a massive structure that they found themselves in, maybe 3-4 floors, and this elevator looked like a later addition. It certainly didn't match the overall rustic decor. Or perhaps that was the idea? The built a rustic oldfashioned building over the frame of durasteel?

You can ask the architect some time...time to focus Ala.

She swung out of the doorway of the elevator and on to the maintenance ladder. It wasn't hard to clambour downwards, and soon Ala found herself quietly stepping on to the roof of the lift. She stooped, touching the roof. She could feel...

"Someone has just entered the lift," she whispered, with a glance shot towards Saija.

Just then the lift lurched before beginning its ascent.

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

...Ala found herself quietly stepping on to the roof of the lift. She stooped, touching the roof. She could feel...

"Someone has just entered the lift," she whispered, with a glance shot towards Saija.

Just then the lift lurched before beginning its ascent.

Chit, the hatch doesn't want to come off. The elevator shaft isn't very high and soon we're in very real danger of being crushed between the ceiling and the ascending liftcar. With moments to spare, I finally free the top access door, diving inside and tackling the unwitting thug to the deck. A good right cross and it's lights out for him.

Now I set the elevator to take us to the lower level. On the way down, the doors open at our prior location. The guard from earlier must have freed himself and now he's here to get us. He shoves his large hand inside the lift, even as the doors haven't fully opened. He seizes me by the throat in a viselike grip, it feels like my head tails are about to pop.

"A little help here..." I squeak out, barely able to breathe.

Ala Quin

 

[Ala Quin]

Sensing the guard on the other side of the door, Ala was not surprised by his presence, but his aggression took her back for a while. Standing wide-eyed in shock for just a time, the Jedi required the Twi'lek speaking to get her into action. Without hesitation, she moved to stand behind the guard and reached up to his temples. She couldn't quite reach...stretching...

The guard spun around, releasing Saija from his grasp and throwing an elbow directly at Ala's throat. Her reaction was fast enough to get her arms in the way and bring up a weak Force shield of protection, but the impact still threw her back off her feet. Hitting the floor with a thud, she felt the impact of the wall take the wind out of her just before her head cracked against the wall.

For just a moment, Ala was dazed, blinking and trying to gain some sense of equilibrium. The guard stomped towards her, spitting curses and promises of what sounded like a painful death for the Jedi.

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

The guard spun around, releasing Saija from his grasp and throwing an elbow directly at Ala's throat. Her reaction was fast enough to get her arms in the way and bring up a weak Force shield of protection, but the impact still threw her back off her feet. Hitting the floor with a thud, she felt the impact of the wall take the wind out of her just before her head cracked against the wall.

For just a moment, Ala was dazed, blinking and trying to gain some sense of equilibrium. The guard stomped towards her, spitting curses and promises of what sounded like a painful death for the Jedi.

The guard drops me to the floor, it takes a second for me to get my air back and for the pounding blood in my head to dissipate. Ala is barely holding her own against the large alien. He stomps at her on the floor and misses, that's when I rear both of my legs back and kick at his legs, double-kneecapping him. I quickly follow with an uppercut, right on the jaw. The thug drops to the floor in a heap on top of the other thug in the corner of the cramped elevator.

Still rubbing my throat where it was raw, I quip with a curt "Thanks."

I look up at the panel, indicating the elevator's floor level. We're almost at the basement. Then I look to you, Ala Quin . "We need a ruse. Help me get this guy up." I get under one of his shoulders and begin hoisting him to his feet. I'm apparently stronger than I look as I don't seem to be struggling, but he's still pretty bulky and his dead weight makes lifting him awkward.

As I lift the goon up to a standing position, I stand behind him and squeeze in close to you. "Get behind him."

We've only got seconds left until the doors open. Neither one of these guys had blasters, thus putting us at a huge disadvantage. But then I see the emergency flame-suppressor canister, it was a pressurized cylnder of gas and powder particulates. I pocket the makeshift acqusition, hoping to make it useful until we can even the odds and get some firepower.

 

[Ala Quin]

Saija's resourcefulness was something to behold. And her brutality, while not admired, was certainly appreciated at least in this instance. The slender, slight little Jedi helped that best she could with lugging the lug of a man into position, and indeed got behind just as she was told to do. Her brow was deeply furrowed as she ran through all the possible permeatations of what Saija could have in mind. And then a smile crept across her face, with the frown dissipating and then reemerging.

"He is a meat shield?"

The term, learned from a sick Sith she had once known, tasted poorly in her mouth. She did not desire anything approaching death for this large, beast of a man. She just wanted to leave! There was no time to protest though as the door slid open. Nothing happened for a moment, but she could hear that there was someone else on the other side of the doorway to the lift.

"Valgar...what's your deal?" Came the gruff sounding...woman? It sure sounded like the voice of a woman who had had far too many tygarian cigars.

There was a pregnant pause. But it was time for Ala and Saija to act. The Jedi had already reached out in her mind to see that there were 3 individuals in the room before them, somewhat of a storage facility. Ala's saber was on a bench in the far left corner.

"Push!"

Giving everything she had, Ala pushed on the back of the tall, heavy set alien guard, and threw him forward.

"What the..."

The woman's response was cut short as the large man, identified as Valgar, came thumping into her, causing her to fall to the ground under his weight. Ala stepped forward, hand outstretched and called through the Force to her saber hilt across the other side of the room. It flew to her, the impact stinging just a little. But the button was already being pressed to ignite the blade and provide the defence they would need...but nothing happened...

Ala glanced at the side of the saber hilt and noted a panel was missing, with a couple of loose wires sticking out.

"Ah, fragnabbits."

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

"Push!" Giving everything she had, Ala pushed on the back of the tall, heavy set alien guard, and threw him forward.

"What the..." The woman's response was cut short as the large man, identified as Valgar, came thumping into her, causing her to fall to the ground under his weight.

As Valgar goes crashing into his companion, one of the remaining thugs is going for his blaster. I send up a huge plume of white smoke in his face with the fire-suppression gas canister, temporarily blinding him. Then I tackle him to the deck. His gun clatters away out of reach as I quickly get into a side mount position over him. When he tries to roll away, I take the opening and wrap my arms around his neck and head, choking him. Seconds later, he drops to the deck, unconscious.

I scramble across the deck to the fallen weapon and turn my attention back to the remaining gangster and Ala Quin ...

 

[Ala Quin]

Watching in awe of Saija's prowess, Ala was a little bugged eyed just for a moment before realizing that there was actually one more crook to sort out. She looked for options. She could run, quickly, and tackle them. But she was slight of frame and there were too many obstacles to make Force sprinting a true option. She could try a mind trick. The crook was probably too alert, and focused to actually fall for it. The adrenaline would overwhelm any control that they had.

The crook lifted a blaster.

Fragnabbits.

She did the one thing she was actually able to do. She threw her lightsaber hilt at their head. The moment she released it, Ala focused through her fingers and pushed the metallic cylander to twice her throwing speed. With a twitch of her finger, she changed its direction a little to the left and then...

CRACK

The saber hilt clattered onto the ground, and the thug looked confused...stunned...and then dropped to his knees before falling face foward on to the floor.

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

Now that some our opposition has been taken care of, I get to recovering my things, including my own blaster pistol. But most importantly, my custom hackbox, the most essential tool I have. And what we'll need for the next step to get out of here.

I offer up the extra blaster pistol to you while pulling up a schematic of the building we're in. "Take this..." I slide it across the workbench.

A holo pops up from a built-in projector and the place which leads out of here is marked in red. "There's the main exit." Just as I'm working out a way to get there, a thunderous alarm ominously blares everywhere. "Great," I quip sarcastically. "It looks like they know we've escaped."

I slam closed my computer case and grab you by the wrist. "Come on, Ala Quin we need to move. Stairs." I point with my blaster at the far end of the room where there's a stairwell access to the levels above.

 

[Ala Quin]

Picking up the blaster, Ala looked it over. She was completely unsure what to do with it. Looking up at Saija, she was going to ask if there was time for a lessong, but already found herself being tugged off towards the stairs. With the blaster tucked under her arm, Ala reached out, calling her saber hilt to hand. Mere seconds before her wrist hit the corner of the wall at the top of the stairs, her saber hilt slapped against her palm and she pulled her hand to safety.

At the top of the stairs was a long corridor, leading to a large window that looked out over the prairie of Froswythe. Both escapees could have enjoyed the view, and possibly escaped from the window itself, if it hadn't been for the half dozen or so guards that bundled around the corner and took up position behind a series of pillars that lined the hallway.

Lifting her blaster, Ala pulled the trigger.

Nothing.

She jumped to the side and took shelter behind the nearest pillar as shots started raining towards her. She looked down at the piece of metal in her hands, and frowned. Point and pull, right?

She leant out again, pointed and pulled.

Nothing.

"Why won't this stupid thing work?" She said, smacking it with the side of her hand. She almost looked down the barrel to see why it was not working, but got a case of the smarts just before doing so.

| Saija Kwann |​

 

[Saija Kwann]

At the top of the stairs was a long corridor, leading to a large window that looked out over the prairie of Froswythe. Both escapees could have enjoyed the view, and possibly escaped from the window itself, if it hadn't been for the half dozen or so guards that bundled around the corner and took up position behind a series of pillars that lined the hallway.

We encounter some resistance as we continue to make our escape. I squeeze off a couple of shots while trying to avoid being hit. One of the ugly thugs falls to the deck after being hit with a blue stun pulse from my weapon; I didn't forget that you didn't want to kill anyone and unnecessary killing wasn't my style.

"Why won't this stupid thing work?" She said, smacking it with the side of her hand. She almost looked down the barrel to see why it was not working, but got a case of the smarts just before doing so.

I see you trying to fiddle with the weapon after an apparent misfire. "Blast." I pull you behind me and make a mini-retreat just long enough to tell you, "The saftey, side toggle. Click once for stun and twice to..." I didn't get to finish my sentence as a laser blast blows a hole in the concrete pillar nearby, showering us with dust and debris.

" Ala Quin , Get down!" I hiss at you. Quickly, I set my blaster to full power, but not to shoot them...I aim high, putting a blaster bolt square into the light fixture at the top of the corridor. A fireball of hot gases, broken lumaglass and exploding sparks rains down on the bad guys. I let loose a series of stun blasts now, pulling the trigger as many times as I can before they can recover...