Private A Friend & Hard Conversation

[Ran Serys]

Location: Odessen
Wearing: Personal Jedi Robes
Tags: Kaleleon

The gathering on Odessen was over. Most of the attendees had departed, bound to spread a rebellion to every corner of the galaxy. Ran Serys was not among them. She stayed on Odessen for a while longer. She stayed for a conversation. Long or brief? She didn't know, but she did know who she'd be talking to, as she led Kaleleon Seleare to her ship.

The Onyx Runner had seen better days, but then again so had Ran. As they entered the ship, she led them down the narrow corridor spanning all four chambers of the ship. They'd only go through two. The loading ramp led them to the first. It was a modular cargo bay which doubled as guest sleeping quarters. Second, there was the kitchen and mess which Ran had obviously retrofitted to function as an actual kitchen for fresh ingredients, unlike the soulless table, chairs, and set of food synthesizers that came in other models of the ship. They stopped in the kitchen as Ran washed her face of the memory of recently cried tears. That was where the non-tour tour ended, but from the hall one could see the other two chambers. The third was a recreation and meditation chamber, and the fourth, the flight deck, was located at the forward most part of the ship.

"So," Ran said as she patted the sink water from her face with a towel. "This is where I feel safest and most secure." She made a gesture about the ship and put the towel down. "We can speak freely here." She proclaimed before reaching into a metal cabinet and pulling out an assortment of fruit harvested from the Gardens of Unil at the Jedi Enclave on Selvaris. "Can I interest you in a meiloorun? Or something else perhaps, Kaleleon?" She took a smaller meiloorun and split it in half, just in case he wanted to share. She rested the bowl with one less fruit on the kitchen table and sat down at one of its stools. She was nervous to share her truth, if only a little, and put it off with any tiny act she could for a few moments longer.

The moments weren't long enough, and they were there to talk, so they'd talk. "I've stepped down from the Jedi Council." Ran ripped the bandaid. It hurt. She had taken pride in the position, as many would. "I've given up my duties to the Order to be here. My duty to the archives, my watchmen's post, the enclave on Selvaris," She said, looking down at the meiloorun, appearing just a bit dejected. "But that won't stop me from fulfilling my duties as a Jedi." She looked at Kale. "I've been away from the order and from the core before, for long periods of time in the past, but this feels different. Why does it feel different? Is it because I don't feel the same about the Galactic Alliance's stance on war? Because I disagree that the Jedi should be a sword for the alliance to aim at their enemies? Or that I don't like the fact it seems violence is too often a Jedi's first answer to a problem? I've seen it. I've done it. Why is this an issue for me now?" Ran laid a lot of what she was thinking out onto the table. Kaleleon might not have had the answers she was looking for, but that didn't stop her from looking at him expectantly.

 

[Kaleleon]

Her vessel she brought me to was essentially a home for her. A mobile one that would allow her to traverse the stars as a Jedi or as her position as a council member of the Jedi. Which I am nearly sure that she was removing herself from. It was something one could just tell when interacting with her current state. Torn and lost. Unsure what to do. Why if she was in such a feeling would she want to lead others when she needs to find herself first? To me, it was rather simple to draw that conclusion. However, I held my tongue to not voice such things to reality unless she so desired to bring them up. Instead, my eyes played about the vessel with the half tour. Just following her to the fairly robust kitchen. Having refrigeration units within, stove and oven. Longer surfaces in which to work with. It was clear she enjoyed to some degree cooking her own food. Which I personally found enjoyable as well. Never quite liked the taste of the packeted calories. Growing on a farm with fresh fruit and livestock ruined that for me.

Her voice broke the silence. Ripping me from my thoughts of her ship and to her instead. Directly telling me this is where she felt the safest. That by being here, we could speak freely without worry. A pause before she produced a fruit I had not seen before. She called it a Meiloorun. I nodded my head before a small answer.

"Never had it before. So I'll try it."

I could feel the nervousness. She had just opened to me a moment ago. However now she was closed up again. As if what had happened, the outburst she had displayed to me, made her not want to share further. Yet, she did want to. I could just see how she was nearly bursting at the seams. Letting her hold the attention of the room. Only broken by confirming my thoughts. She left the council. Removed herself from the New Jedi Order. Even the enclave she so cherished. She was completely lost. Her voice just began. Touching multiple points of contention that she had about the Jedi, the Alliance, and her place in it. How she had done those things then, and now she found herself unable to continue with that status quo. I simply nodded to her and stayed where I was. Using my fingers to peal back the rine of my half of the fruit before taking a bite. Enjoying it for a moment. Swallowing before speaking once she was done.

"Violence in a violent world is normal. It feels natural that it should be the answer to many solutions. No matter where it stems from. Jedi, Dark Jedi, Sith. Rogues gallery of different galactic factions. It doesn't matter."

I took another bite. Letting its taste flood my mouth. I shouldn't be enjoying it as much as I am, but with the past couple weeks of me flying legitimately back and forth across the galaxy, it was the first fresh food I had in a hot minute. Swallowing once more to answer further.

"You see the violence now as it is. The problem in why the world is violent. A cyclical cycle of the world being violent, so one must be the violence. And thus perpetuation of what was already there."

I look down at the fruit in my hands. A piece pealed away from the rind and looked at for a moment before a smile formed on my face. Hoping that my next words would be a partial answer to her.

"The issue is not that the violence is there. Your issue is that you see how you could have perpetuated it. Allowed such actions to happen under your watch, or even done them yourself. That, is what makes you a good Jedi. The ability to see where the fault lay, and wanting to change it. You have the ability to do so. You can move objects hundreds of meters with a swipe of your hand. You wield a blade of plasma that can pierce through nearly any material known. Your mind is a power in which very little of the population can harness. And yet here you are, doubting your ability."

I popped the piece into my mouth. A quick couple bites before swallowing. Finally looking to her for the first time since entering her vessel. Almost as if my sight was bringing the point home.

"Your eyes opened to what you feel needs to be changed Serys. The question is, What are you going to do with that new knowledge?"

Yet another piece bitten off as I finished my question. Not often did I get all philosophical. It was a task normally kept within the halls of a temple. The theory of how the force, and the Jedi should act. I had learned much in my time alone after being demoted to a Padawan. Many of those lessons I realized were only just now being put truly to use. And it showed heavily. Only proving the point of the Nobles, and the council at the time. That there was still so much more I needed to learn before I could have been accepted once more into the New Jedi Order. It felt like I was finally able to apply what I had learned.

It made me realize what was happening to me on a personal level. Not just Ran.

Ran Serys