Journal Entry #4

Still nothing...-How many weeks has it been now? Months even...
I must have stuck around on Nar Shaddaa for two weeks before the petty excuse for Authorities started taking me seriously and "went off looking" for Master Hex. There's been no trace or sign of her at all. I can't even feel her signature in the Force anymore and that's not normal for someone who's meant to be their Master's Apprentice...
I can't stop repeating the day over and over in my head when I lay in bed at night, or just think about what could've happened. Is she in trouble, is she hurt?? I don't know!! This is torture...-I know she's strong in the Force, far more than I could be but she's only three years older than me. I always treat her like she's someone older...-She's more experienced but obviously even she can make mistakes or run into trouble because now she's gone and I should've gone with her!
She told me to hold up in the Prophet, wouldn't even tell me what it was she was up to. Some sort of "Personal business" she said, important but not important enough to take your Apprentice along for the ride. Now I'm sitting in the Cargo Hold of your ship on a Silver Jedi world not knowing what else to do with myself.
Mom and the Systems Alliance never had anything to do with the Je'daii Order. Dad knew you but he's force knows where and for all I care he can stay out there. If he hadn't left in the first place then things wouldn't be so bad to begin with! Now I've lost you too. I've still got Mom and Lori of course but it's not the same, they don't know the Force or know me the way you do. We trained together, lived and explored world's together. You helped me grow up a lot faster in the few years than school back home ever did for me...
So far the Silver Jedi Order has agreed to take me in. I guess they're waiting to see how things go though before any training and stuff actually kicks off. I don't know much about the Jedi aside from what Asaraa's told me. She's not a Jedi Knight or a Master though so I don't think she really knows what's going to happen to me whether they accept me or not. Until then...-At-least it's another place that I can stay. As long as I make myself useful and don't get in the way of anyone, I think they won't mind so much until someone tells me what I should be doing with myself...
Still...-I miss you, and I hope your safe...-But somehow I know you're not and that's killing me.