*turns on recorder*

One day someone will likely find this and wonder what it is and then they might play it. today is a confusing day after three long years Verz has come back. And I am twisted inside over my feelings Verz and I have never shared the field of combat. We've shared some celebrations. He has never gone hunting with me. He does not know the twists I've had in side myself in the last three years. The changes I've gone through.

Others have been there, others took the time to be a friend.

I've had no other lover though.

In passing conversation Strider offered to take care of anything I might need in that department, HA! I did as most of the women do around him smile, joke and move along.

He said something else though that sticks inside me, when a woman is lonely she will do things she once though repugnant.

So, does that mean he got most of his women because they had reached that point?

Since he said it though I've been asking myself if I am lonely. So I've been taking stock of things, and realize that I am a bit lonely.

I am close to very few, I can count on my one hand the friends I have made. But there is only one voice that makes me smile, one voice that gives me courage when mine is failing, one voice that gives me what I need.

If I am honest with myself I know who I want beside me.

Strider you should know that right now I don't like you for making me think these things. so Damn you. This is your fault, I was fine until you said something. I will knock you on your shebs the next time we meet and you will wonder why. BUT I will know why

*turns recorder off*