You Come Into my House

[Haytham Kaze]

Haytham stared up at her. Unmoving as she spoke. He couldn't, did she even believe him? His head lowered and he shook his head. She had to believe him. He loved her. He wanted her to see that, but how could he ever let what she did to him go.

He wouldn't forget it.

Placing both of his hands on the ground, he pushed up to his feet, those powerful legs supporting the weight of that powerful body. Those eyes of his burned brightly, brighter than maybe the sun. But he was never going to try and hide those eyes from her again. "I would never hurt you, [member="Joza Perl"]," he said softly as he took one shaky step towards her. "I-I don't know how to make them go away," he continued as his eyes closed. They felt as if they burned holes in his skull. He had only experienced this a handful of times in his past.

Never had he enjoyed the sensation.

He'd stand in front of her. Unwavering as he looked into her emerald eyes. "Don't try and throw this away..." Haytham's legs took another step towards her, until he'd be right in front of her. "I won't forgive you, Joza Perl. But, I won't forsake you, not while I know we both love each other." He said. His eyes may have changed colours, but they glinted as they usually did when he smiled, and his lips were mirroring that in what could easily be considered a sad smile.

His hand went to her face, aiming to cup her chin in his hand if she'd allow him.

 

[Joza Perl]

Joza’s wariness reflected in her eyes as he moved toward her, again unsure of how she should feel. He’d calmed down, but yet the touch of dark side had no faded from his face. She wanted to take a step back as he approached, but couldn’t bring herself to do it. Not to him. She couldn’t turn from him.

She swallowed thickly when he spoke of the love they held for eachother, and then she did look away. She feared meeting his eyes, feared what she would find in them. She was afraid of the darkness, afraid of loving him. She didn’t deserve this kind of devotion as she’d only end up breaking his heart again.

But she let him cup her chin, his touch sending tingles through her skin. “I’m only going to end up hurting you.” She whispered, a few stray tears finally spilling over her lower eyelids. “I-it’s in my blood…as a Zeltron and from my father. I’ll…I’ll always stray….” She looked away again as her body began to tremble from the sheer force of their emotions and the prickling fear of his eyes.

[member="Haytham Kaze"]

 

[Haytham Kaze]

He was gentle with her. More so than he had ever been with anyone in his life. When his hand found her chin, he'd more urge her to face him and look him in the eyes rather than force her. His hand would be a guiding touch. He'd blink as he waited for her to look upon him. "You aren't afraid of me..." He said. She reflected him, back in some of his first encounters with the Dark Side. He saw that now, he could feel it deep within her. "You're afraid of yourself," he'd say softly, quietly, as if he spoke in louder he'd break her into a million pieces.

Now, he pulled her into those powerful arms of his if she'd allow him, burying his face into that red hair. "How long since Bakura, Joza?" He asked softly, those golden eyes of his closed tightly as they'd hopefully press together. He wanted her to say it. Since then, all of his days had looked the same. In fact, he was disappointed with his progress, but it didn't matter that much. She had that ability he had realized on Zeltros -- the ability to make his worries go away.

"We both lead lives that could end at any moment. I'm not going to let either of us, feel bad for anything." He'd turn his head away from her for a brief moment as he remembered something. "How else will you get that new dress?" At that moment, he turned his head back to her and the corruption in his eyes started to fade as for the first time in a while, a true, genuine smile came to those lips of his.

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

“I am.” She stated plainly, her voice coming out shakier than she would have liked. Swallowing, Joza took a few moments to steady herself before speaking again. “I am afraid of myself. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t still fear you when you have those eyes. I’ve been hurt by those eyes before.” A finger would graze against the light scar on her cheek as she spoke.

When he wrapped his arms around her, she did not resist—but she did not return the gesture. Instead the Zeltron stood still as stone, arms at her sides. “Several years.” She responded, her voice still soft but slowly gaining strength. She bit her tongue at his last words, several thoughts swimming through her head. She didn’t want to hurt him, but it seemed to be inevitable.


“Haytham…I’m just going to end up doing it again.” She muttered lowly against him, breath coming out in gentle puffs. She would pull back to look at him, tinges of regret flashing in her eyes, shoulders relaxing at seeing the bright yellow hue fade from his own. Joza almost cringed as he smiled, her stomach twisting in knots. “I can’t stay loyal. I will hurt you, and I don’t want to put you through that.”

[member="Haytham Kaze"]

 

[Haytham Kaze]

His black mane shook from side to side as he listened to her spoke. He was stronger than beskar on this. A stubbornness that hadn't been used in a long time came to light. "You know why I have those eyes, [member="Joza Perl"]." He pushes a handful of hair away from his forehead again. "Everyone in this Galaxy has been hurt by those eyes." His hand raised up to where her finger would graze, but he'd hesitate to actually touch her face. Instead, he'd let his arm drop back down to his side.

"Several years." He'd repeat a few moments after her. "And what brought you here, to Bespin? Cloud Nine especially? It couldn't be for me, surely..." He'd let his words drag on. Simultaneously, he wanted an answer, but he also didn't. They had planned to make more time for each other on Bakura, but all that had happened was that they had less contact with each other.

His jaw clenched at that realization.

"Joza Perl." He said, he wanted her full attention when he spoke now. "I would rather that than never see you again. I can't put into words the things I feel for you. I..." His mouth opened, but nothing else came out of it. So, he just closed it again. His jaw was set, he was determined.

 

[Joza Perl]

Sucking in her lower lip, Joza shook her head so slowly that it could have been mistaken for idle movements. Was he trying to detract from her own experiences? That thought faded as quickly as it came. Her head was swimming and she was in no state to try and discern the emotions she could barely grasp for more than a few seconds. “How long have you been able to do that? Those eyes, I mean.” Her gaze found his hand as it moved toward her and she made no indication that she would shy away from him. And then, she took a step back and put some distance between them.

No. No, I didn’t come here for you. I got dragged along by one of my friends. She didn’t speak, only swallow quickly as she took in his words. This was spiraling out of her grasp quickly, or at least it was in her own mind. Her unfaithfulness, the feelings between them, his dip into the dark side…it was all too much for her to handle right now, much less process. Overloaded, she did the only thing she could do. She shut down, and she pushed him away.

“Enough.” She cut over his last words, voice uncharacteristically callous—but it was not entirely cold as there were hints of sorrow and regret speckled in. “We’ve had more sex than conversations. You first took me, what, an hour after we met on Zeltros? You were seduced by me, and now you’ve fallen victim to a woman who does not love you.” She paused, matching his determined expression with a firm one of her own. “Detach yourself from me, for your sake.” Turning on her heel, she brought her attention to the placement of the sun in the sky though one of the large windows.

“My friends should be waking up now. They’re probably wondering where I am.” She murmured, loud enough for him to hear. Her eyes would settled on the exit.

[member="Haytham Kaze"]

 

[Haytham Kaze]

When she took her step back, he felt that he had lost her. It was likely true, and he raised his arms to cross over his chest, trying his hardest so as to keep those hands of his from clenching. She frustrated him, always had, but this time around it wasn't because of something heartwarming. Exhaling from his mouth, he'd answer, "Once before when I had been shot by a Sith Lord with a Hapan Gun of Command, it forced m-" He stopped there, the name of the weapon was self-explanatory. Besides, he thought it best not to go into details, considering it was his Master, Darth Orcus, the Sith Lord who he spoke of, who had shot him with the Gun of Command.

He remembered how he had explained what it did before he shot him and gave the order to succumb to the Dark Side.

Just from her lack of a response he knew that she hadn't come here for him. Within only an hour of being in each other's presences, she slighted him again and again. Was she right Likely, but he didn't want to lose her. Especially the woman that was trying to push him away rather than hurt him again.

His jaw clenched, tightening harder than he had ever felt before. "You know that's not true," he'd say. He'd blink, deep within, her words had wounded him, again. Had she truly decided that their feelings for each other only existed because she had seduced him? He almost opened his mouth to say something else, but he didn't. Instead, he'd reach out to either side of him and call both of his lightsabres back to his palms. He'd turn away from her as she spoke her last words as he hooked the hilts back to the belt loops.

"You don't need to give me a reason to leave." Haytham said. His words were void of emotion, he forced himself not to care. He couldn't anymore, no matter how much he thought he needed to. His fists clenched to either side of his body.

He hadn't expected to ask this question, but she had mentioned becoming a Knight. His mouth opened and he spoke the words, "Tell me what you know of Dromund Kaas."

[member="Joza Perl"]

 

[Joza Perl]

As she spoke to him she was calm, perhaps even a bit more confident in her words than she expected to be. But as the silence lapsed between him, so did her assurance waver. Joza wasn’t sure what she should do, and caught in a torrent of emotion, had panicked. There was no going back now, she had to stand by her decision.

Shut up. Her teeth ground together as her back was turned, but she could bring no words to surface. Don’t question me. She rolled her shoulders in surprise when he asked her about his homeworld, the question seemingly unexpected. It was a relief to hear the emotion drain from his voice. Good. That will make this easier.

“Dromund Kaas.” She half turned towards him as she spoke, acknowledging his question. “The darkness there seems to emanate from the core of the planet itself…along the landscape and into the sky.” The Zeltron recalled with distaste how dreary the planet felt and how difficult it was for her to find sleep on the dark world. “I was there as a Padawan with my Master. There was some sort of…attack of undead creatures.” Her brow furrowed at the memory of Matsu Xiangu’s zombie invasion on Dromund Kaas and seeing her Master in a rage for the first time. She shrugged, staring him down as if he had asked the wrong question. They used to look at eachother with such warmth, but Joza wouldn’t let the pleasant memories beckon her into retracting her earlier words.

There’s no going back now.

[Exit]

[member="Haytham Kaze"]