The Justice of Akovin

[Cassus Akovin]

In continuation of Justice Bargaining, but post-Omega Battle...​

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suUpLj3gpeE​

She laid face up in her bed, looking at the ceiling as her luxury yacht darted through hyperspace.

The Omega War was over, and all she had now was to return to Soceras. There were millions, and millions of people awaiting her return, beckoning in an age in their lives that would speak of fortune and prosperity in their isolated directionless lives. Despite the horrors of the Omega War many had faced... Triam had survived virtually unscathed by the repercussions of the conflict. She lost droids to the First Order, her life endangered with her only comrade as was usual for her in her line of work, and she watched as the dreaded weapon that had brought all the galaxy together for one isolated moment, fall to the surface of Castameer. Like many on the surface of that doomed world, she had escaped the doom that encapsulated the planet.

She knew the hundreds of thousands, perhaps millions or more, who would be displaced and put into the position of tragedy because of these events... the only thing she was concerned about was the loss of her investment here. She had not been hired by any power, and bought her forces from the market coincidentally prior to word got out about the War... she had lost many of those droids, and it seemed to be the only thing she cared about aside from her own minor wounds and that of her financial partner.

Triam Akovin cared for nothing, as was natural for her to do.

A door slid open to her quarters, and in that doorway a man stood there, with red skin. His name of course was Crol H'hurut, the zeltron mercenary she had come to work closely with over the past several years. It was not unlike him to intrude upon her personal space... but it was unlike him to do so in her living quarters. Something was up.

"Dxun," The geezer grunted without elaboration. "I have need to go there." Very odd.

"Are you formerly asking for a vacation, or something?" Her head was up, and her eyes rolled in dismissal before it fell again. The man grunted again.

"Dxun, is not a vacation spot." Once more without elaborating his intentions, there was a pause. Before Triam could fill it with something, he spoke again. "It's in relation to the Omega War..." This time, her body rose to sit up, so that she could see his face with her own quizzical look. Not many things bothered this hardened dark force user, it was a curiosity that some battle they lost that ultimately held not value to them, would have him so troubled. Had she done something wrong? She thought on all the possibilities her mind could, upon looking back at that battle. His face was turned away from her, the light slightly glinting upon his crimson eyes and red bald head.

"What about it? We lost, so what? The Omega fell, and the galaxy is just as it was." This prompted a scornful snort from the alien.

"Like I would care about the galaxy!" He took a moment to suppress a venomous chortle. "No... I am far more concerned about that battle, and your security, for more... personal reasons." His eyes slowly turned towards her, gazing at her with an unfamiliar intensity. Triam's eyebrows crunched together, as her eyes clearly tried to mathematically surmise the precise emotional state and thought pattern his old wrinkly face could reveal.

​

"Triam, do you love anyone?"​

​

...​

​

The question caught her completely off guard, and it was clear to her, the empathetic Zeltron knew it as well. Did she love anyone? For a time, she thought she had loved many people... or least, felt drawn to them. Her first gallivanting into the galaxy, brought her into contact with a Mandalorian who would shape her world view in many ways... or at least, her attempt to change the way she was. His name was Preliat Mantis, and their relationship quickly became strained... despite her admiration, he had always been distant. She seemed to be drawn to him, to observe his behaviors, his reactions, his thoughts... as if he were an animal to be studied. Promises were made to him, she intended in her mind to keep, but in her heart...? Was that sort of obsession over a human being, that promise of making one proud, love? She had admired her father, obsessed with his tales of battles and conflict, enthralled in his mental games of strategy, inspired his rank in life. His death, only amplified those attributes, and shaped her into the combatant she was today. Her mother though... she had never loved her mother. This she knew as objective fact. Nothing admirable, or worth obsession in a woman who spent her entire life confined within the home, submissive to a man that was stronger and more successful than she would ever be. If anything, Triam knew exactly who she did not love. In someway, she knew Crol did not mean that sort of love. The love, of obsession, of admiration alone.

Did she even know what the love was he was talking about?

After a moment, that to Crol must have seemed an eternity, he broke the dumb silence she had given him. She had become nothing more than a fawn, caught in his headlights. Nobody had this effect on her, but intellectually she knew Crol may have been influencing her emotions, messing with her hormones.

"Triam, I felt something during the battle... something small, weak, and vulnerable. When I was caught in the fury of battle, to protect you," Triam would wonder later, why his instincts had been to protect her, when they were so adamant they hated one another for what they were. "I found myself... protecting more, than- more than just you."

Her mind tried to connected these unrelated queries of love, battle, and an allies protection. Somewhere deep within her, she might have known... but the horror of that reality had been removed from her mind. The words of the Zeltron were slowly settling from the esoteric, into the direct revelation he intended to impart upon her.

"What?" She found herself saying not of her own accord, almost breathlessly.

"You are with child, Triam."​

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Dear James,

We have a lot to discuss now that the Omega War is done, and the threat is over. We've business to attend to, and it may be more than either of us had been expecting.

I will tell you more on Sorceras.

Expect me there in a few days time.

- Triam.

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

James was never one to get involved in the business of the galaxy. He had made more money staying clear of the affairs of major governments, large organizations, and all that ilk than he ever had by getting involved. Sure, his stint at Roche for the Mandalorians and the Republic both had earned him millions in one of the biggest hustles possible, but that was a one off and one that had earned him ire in both camps. So when Omega happened, where was James? Where he had always been--drinking away his pain and partying hard.

But dark days loomed on the horizon for all things Justice. The spacer stood on the balcony overlooking his glorious Dal'Bor and felt foreboding. As if hell itself was going to break loose soon. Ryn would have said it was the force or some sort of bullcrap like that but things had been quiet too long. It was like a storm was gathering and he didn't like it. Affairs with Theta had been calm for too long, especially after the raid. He looked to the horizon and could see the mecha planet gleaming like one of the stars in Soceras' purple setting sky. The sister planets were on a collision course to war and James had seen it--and now he was preparing to cause it.

And there was the Prosecutor. James grit his teeth. It had been months since their last encounter. It was not like James to go so long without a contact from the fiend. Every slaver ring, ever death, every mass shooting, every explosion on Soceras was somehow linked to that devil. The master tactician struck like a snake, coiling and ramming their head in, fangs barred just where and when it hurt the most. If it had been this long since their last encounter--the spacer could only imagine what was in store.

"Is this the end of me?" he mused aloud, turning and walking from his view, "Is this how the fall begins?"

Never had that reality ever been more present than now. James looked at his holographic planetary display. It splayed out like a massive chessboard. His fleet was spread across it, like moving pieces in a great jigsaw. Some to war, some to carry. He tapped in a rapid set of keys and another display showed--his spies. The spacer's eyes and ears were everywhere. They had to be, how else would he have maintained his empire otherwise? James quirked a brow, when had he started thinking in terms of empire? Was there something to conquer?

His datapad buzzed and the spacer snatched it up, tapping it alive. His brows furrowed deeper at Akovin's message. Dark times are ahead.

Triam. Come right in and hurry. Dun't stop nowhere, dun't stop at all. Be wary of everything and everyone. Come right to the Angel's Den, ye will be escorted right in.
--Justice

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FbyaN7dG8E​

...

Thoughts returned to battle, upon that frigid world. She had been so careless, so reckless. If only she had known, perhaps she would have left the day to someone else to save... could she have taken that chance? All turned out well, but the thought remained: what if it hadn't? Triam Akovin was once again creating something, but it was one thing she had never expected to endure, something she never dreamed of happily. It was inside of her, something small... weak... vulnerable. Those were the words he had used, and those are the words that described her.

She let out a long sigh, closing her wet eyes.

When was the last time her eyes did that? When was the last time she had felt so... infuriatingly human. In her minds eye, Triam Akovin was simply a person she knew well, in her mind she was not human at all. To Triam Akovin, she was The Relentless, a force of war that could not be stopped, that could counter anything thrown her way.

Wiping away the remnants of her emotions, she looked down upon her near naked form, to her stomach. There was nothing to be seen, but those piercing blue eyes saw a glowing something resting just so upon her. Her soft hand gently reached for the unseen glow, caressing her stomach, as if searching - as if asking, "are you really there?". With a short gasp and slightly widened eyes, she quickly retracted her human hand which had acted on an instinct that was not her own. The hand clutched the air, as if afraid it would empty from the room if she did not hold on to it. The hand slowly retreated to hide her mouth, her eyes unable to break their ever watchful gaze.

Her mechanical hand now, to her will, covered softly against the supple flesh of her stomach, wrapping it in the protective steel of an Akovin. What was this feeling? Her heart uncomfortably ached, her mind was ragged, the darkness of her room shrouded her in this huddled form.

Knock knock knock.

Her whole body twisted to face the door, her eyes wide like an animal, startled by the sound. Her human hand stretched out to block the danger the body had perceived, before her rational mind tugged control over the mechanical movements of her body, which lifted her form from the floor like a puppet with strings. What is this war within me?

Without bothering to make herself decent, her mechanical hand removed itself from her naval and pressed on the controls that would unlock the door. It slid upwards to reveal the face of her compatriot, who could feel and sense her state of disrepair. Many people dealt with such news in different ways. When it was a surprise, some were excited and happy, blessed with a miracle. Others were anxious but were not entirely displeased. Others dreaded it for all their lives and did all they could to avoid it... or stop it. Crol could not place what was going on within Triam, and he never did... only time would tell her true thoughts. Nonetheless, he did find it within himself to pity her. The fear that one can get once they realized they had risked more than they were willing to lose is a gripping one... especially true of one who was destined to be a mother. He knew such feelings could awaken things within a person, things that were alien to them, things that they would fear, and things that they would need to overcome if they were to grow.

Despite the air of superiority and bravery "The Relentless" had shown over the years... he knew from her frequent bouts of introversion, at her core "Triam Akovin" had always been a fearful girl. Never of danger, but of responsibility. Of obligation. Of dedication. Of permanence. Nothing demanded responsibility, obligation, and dedication in such a permanent manner than motherhood. For every day she lived knowing her life might be taken in that moment, never before had she been so petrified, and afraid of something.

Crol looked upon her wordlessly, nodded, and merely moved out of the doorway.

Triam took her first steps out of the door, and found herself the decency to be clothed. With a heavy breath, in nothing more than plain garments that had long collected dust, she set her ship down upon the surface of Sorceras, remembering the message James had sent to her. It had been just as unexpected and eerie as her own to him, and it bothered her. Somehow, within her, she knew in some way he had felt this coming. Everything pointed to it, and she knew the storm was only upon the horizon. The force knew how many nights she would weather it.

Crol stood upon the ramp of her old freighter, a vessel used for its familiarity and comfort, and watched as she walked away, as if she were walking the green mile. Sorrow filled his heart, as it often did, but also a sort of hopefulness unfamiliar to himself. Something within him, that beckoned him to follow this woman to the ends of the galaxy, not because of who she was... but of what she was carrying upon her shoulders... what she represented to herself, and to others. There was something within her, he knew that would break. Something that would change her heart. A change she would never break away from, again. A change he had long since forgotten within himself, that only now was breathed into life with the embers of her determination. Closing the ramp, he walked back in, realizing in some fatherly way... he did care for that woman.

Triam walked briskly through the grime of Sorceras, heeding James's advice. Eventually, she would be found at the doorstep of the Angel's Den, and she would look up to read the emblazoned words, curiously. Then, she would hear words.

"Miss Akovin?" Quickly looking down with that same doe-eyed expression, her features slowly softened. Her escort. Nodding, she allowed them to take their positions around her, and ferry her into the building that had started all of this...

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

It didn't take long for Katsumoto to find his way to James' office. The man who had once been a warlord wearing durasteel plates and linens was now a well-adjusted, normal-ish looking warrior who bore his trusted sword on his side like James carried his DeathHammer. The man gave a bow to James, "You call, my lord?"

The spacer slammed a stack of papers on his desk that he had been idly thumbing. "Its time." He locked eyes with his second in command, "Prepare operation graveyard."

Katsumoto's eyebrows narrowed slightly in quiet dissent, "My lord, if I may, we do not have all the data, you do not even know if the planet is there."

James' dark eyes stared deep into the soul of his trusted captain of the guard, "That is why I am leaving ye behind. I can trust ye to take care of me own, no matter what happens," the spacer grabbed his bottle of ale from the corner of his desk. He took a pull from it, letting out a satisfied sigh, "hell is comin, Katsumoto. I can't decide when, but I can choose where and who I meet it with. I dun't even know if I am gonna make it through this alive, but I do know that if I do? I dun't want it to happen here. Too many people can be hurt."

"Sir?" A droid interrupted, popping its head in the door, "Madam Akovin is here."

The spacer looked at Katsumoto, "Summon the family, set up the Miss Fortune. This needs to be ready soon."

"Yes, my lord," the warlord bowed out and James strode through the halls towards the private lounge where unlike last time, the two would be completely alone.

James wasn't as jovial or lighthearted as he had been during their first visit. His flirty gaze was replaced with a hard, intense stare. He swept through the room with his eyes a few moments before looking at Triam and sitting, back ram rod strait and alert on the couch.

"Ye came alone?" he asked at last.

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

"No," She nearly grimaced as she said the word on instinct, and thought to correct herself so as not to alarm him... but she felt her initial instincts to say as much were appropriate. "Not exactly."

It was the truth after all, she was most definitely not alone. Not in her mind. One of her hands in her lap gasped the fabric of her clothes slightly, as she brought her eyes up to match James's as he walked in. His appearance was as ragged as hers, and though neither had known the other very long, they both knew this was not their natural state of beings. He had caught her vulnerable, she had caught him sleepless.

"You look troubled with something, I hate to be a further burden upon your conscience. I don't mean to make this impersonal so quickly, though I've reason for it..." She nearly stumbled upon her words, struggling though not in vain, with her composure, "... but I am left wondering if our deal that night is to be fulfilled."

She eyed him carefully, in what could be passed for calculating... but truly her lock with his hard gaze only served as a place to anchor her focus in reality, behind her eyes there was a glossy decoherence between what she saw and felt. The answer to her question was meaningless, and she felt he likely knew this. The subject of that night and its results, could not be broached so easily...

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

James' eyes narrowed a fraction. He could smell something was up, his sixth sense for sniffing out trouble had saved his life more than once and now, it was tingling like mad. Ryn would have told him it was the Force at work in his senses, the spacer would have just called it good old fashioned street smarts. He crossed his arms across his chest, his jaw clenching slightly.

"My side of the bargain still stands," the spacer said, his words deliberately chosen. His tone was hard and cold like ice, the tone you expected from a pirate godfather, "That if ye can still supply me men with goods, then I can provide ye the credits for the work."

His unspoken message was loud and clear; weapons first, money later. Perhaps it was his past with business deals gone sour--or perhaps it was just the stress he was under but James was clearly not catching what was happening here. And he didn't have the grace at the moment to see otherwise. In his mind, he was preparing for his own demise. He knew the storm was coming and he didn't know if he would be standing when it was over. If he wasn't--then James' family and his people would need things in the best shape he could leave for them. No outstanding debts, no unfinished deals, no gray areas left to be had.

"Now if ye are having second thoughts," James said continued, his voice taking a sudden turn for snake-like silkiness, "We can alter the deal, but there will be compensation required for breach 'o contract."

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

Triam managed against all odds to smirk a little.

"The only contracts I breach, are the one's I make with Hutts." It was true, the only contract she had ever signed and never followed through with, was an absurd deal between herself and a Hutt by the name [member="Popo"]. Maybe one day she would fulfill it, but fact of the matter was, it was long over due, and she didn't expect him to be too happy to have been waiting so many years. She was surprised there was no outstanding bounty on her head... maybe there was and she never knew it.

She would have to find out in the next several months, and that thought caused her smirk to vanish instantly. Her eyes went down cast as her mechanical hand reached up to run its fingers through her short disheveled hair.

"The deal will proceed. I'll hire your people here on Sorceras, and your best employees will receive my equipment until we're ready to mass produce for all of them. There is just one more thing we need to discuss... woman to man." Triam wondered why it was so difficult to look into the mans eyes. There was a coldness in heart, and she wondered briefly if it would even be worth telling him. For all she knew, he might just be some dead beat that knocks up women like her and leaves them to handle themselves... which she wouldn't mind actually, but she figured he at least deserved to know the consequences of her recklessness. Or his? Perhaps it was a mutual bit of fun that shouldn't have happened. But even if it was his intention for that night to proceed as it did, she allowed it to happen. She could have walked out when the deal was made, and her life would've been the very same. Instead, she had to live with that acceptance into her life, as she still had trouble with the idea of killing innocence, despite her ruthless career as a Mercenary. Fact of the matter was, no matter what she decided to do, her life had been altered in ways she had never expected, and would have to live with - forever.

"It's about what happened, after the contract was agreed upon."

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

James' jaw and eyes relaxed slightly. Good, they were on the same page then, it was one less debt or unresolved matter he had to worry about in his ledger. He uncrossed his arms, letting out an imperceptible exhale. He didn't have to play hard boss right now, he supposed the galaxy came with a few mercies every now and then.

What happened after their contract was sealed? James tilted his jaw slightly, feeling the flesh of his cheek between his teeth as he thought back. He was, as usually, drinking. There were drinks--several drinks--and... he made it to third base, as the kids called it.

"Dun't feel awkward," the spacer said with a wave of his hand and a slight shrug, "Happens all the time. Ye know stardust? Me sis-in-law now? I took her 'afore she became me admiral. That were years afore she met Gray. Things like that? They happen all the time with me; half-Zeltron, remember? I mix business with pleasure all the time."

Of course, that was for better or worse. He was a man of vast excess, and his brazenness was for some a severe issue. For him, he just didn't see a point in keeping things like that, things that everyone knew was happening, a secret. Beings procreated, it was enjoyable, and he failed to see how that was a sin or whathaveya. That was the only reason he could think of her talking about it. Unless....

"Oh, are ye back for seconds?" the spacer asked, quirking a genuinely but sly smile. "Well, if ye had that much fun, I got a twi'lek I'm having over and we can share her tonight."

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

Triam's face frowned slightly while at the same time maintained perfect neutrality as the man explained his various exploits and no doubt conquests. It nearly caused her a bit of frustration that she might have been a conquest, while she hoped she was more of an experience of curious exploration. These thoughts diminished almost as soon as they appeared, her mind still a vortex of tumultuous emotion. While his explanation and suggestion might have garnered her to roll her eyes in any other situation (a suggestion she would genuinely calculate if she were interested in such things, not bound to the standard concepts of "love making", considering to her it was always merely a physical act)... this was not one of those situations. To her, it was of the utmost seriousness, and while she was glad in someway she had relaxed what she assumed to be her "friend" out of the mindset of cold business... he remained utterly oblivious to her intentions.

"I appreciate the enthusiasm, but stuff like this, doesn't 'happen all the time'," She said at first, "Or at least, I should hope not." She thought on it some, briefly gallivanting into calculating how common an occurrence like this occurs for a man like James, and then thought better on it. It was best left dark to her, considering their tenuous connection at best. She did need to know where this man had been, or how many people were related to him. The only thing that concerned her... was how he would react.

She was, for reasons she did not know exactly why, afraid of that. Perhaps it was the final acknowledgment of what occurred taking permanence, or if she - delivered - and James was angry...? What sort of future would her - result - have, if their father was spiteful of their existence? Triam had always hated her mother... what if it was within an Akovin's nature to hate their mother, and without a father to love them..?

She decided to broach the subject as subtly as she could, not finding the bravery normally accustomed to her within herself to reveal her troubles directly. She looked up to him finally, with her eyes, before asking the question, both of her hands clasping together within her lap.

"James, have you been a father before?"

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

Stuff like this? James could already tell where this was going by the wording already. He'd never had 'the talk' before. Most of the time he either never heard back from the woman or--they never told him or took efforts to make sure that conception never happened. Either way, he had never had this sort of thing happen before. He tilted an eyebrow upward, angling his his head just a few degrees at the question.

He paused for a moment, the question lingered in the air for a moment. "Aye." James paused, his mind went to his wife. She had died--she was carrying their son, his first child, when the accident happened. People didn't understand--he had not only married her, he settled down to start a family with her. Then she was torn from his hands. Ripped away, and their unborn child with her.

He swallowed, shoving that memory away, back in the recesses of his mind where it belonged, to only fester and draw more pain and bitterness like a wound draws infections.

"Aye, I have," he repeated, fishing a series of photos from his pocket and handing them to Triam, "There be me children I know of; Jessica, Brooklyn, and Calvin. God knows how many more I have." There was really only one reason the lady would ask that sort of question, and James could easily figure it out, "Do ye have medical plans set up already? A home?"

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

"Good looking kids," She complimented the pictures he showed her with a small smirk, as he sat next to her. Some how she knew her question had struck a cord somewhere within James, but was so preoccupied with her own selfish worries, that no mental energy was expended on trying to dig up what it was... she also saw the kind of pain that was in his heart, the sort she might have seen in Preliat... or herself. It was something better left in private, or at least to someone one knew for more than a single night of ecstasy.

She didn't know yet whether having James as an experienced father was something to be thankful for or not, but considering he had pictures of some of his kids... she began to feel, in this dreaded situation, it was a stroke of good luck. At the very least, she knew he was not angry... or at least did not voice that he was. Some of her fear fell from her, but her stressed posture continued. This was all still troubling to her, after all. As James asked the direct questions she dared not voice till now, her human hand rose from her lap to brush against the side of her hair, before returning to rest in the palm of her mechanical one.

"If ya count a ship as a home, I've got two. As for medical plans..." Her voice trailed off into a sigh, a downward face, closed eyes and gritted teeth. She felt her emotions raise with her fluttering heart, but she suppressed them mentally. She would not be brought to tears so easily.

"I can't be a mother, James..." She shook her head, maintaining the same posture with her eyes still closed... a battlefield imagined behind them, and events that never happened. "I was in the presence of the Omega... the First Order attacked my forces even as greater threats loomed abroad and above. I was involved in one of the largest single battles in history, and certainly the largest since the Darkness ended." Her eyes opened, tenuously maintaining her emotions in check, while keeping her gaze at the floor.

"If I had been hit - " Her voice choked momentarily, "I can't be a mother." She repeated, glancing briefly to James. "I'm a fraking soulless mercenary without any true morals to speak of! My word means nothing if it doesn't fulfill my motivations for avarice or sadism..." She looked to James with searching eyes. Without knowing what she was searching for, she longed for something from James, anything. They were both sinners, in all sorts of ways, and she wasn't sure who was worse... wasn't sure who was real.

"I can't be a mother..."

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

"Thanks," James said, feeling a sense of natural pride rise up in him. They were his, his offspring, it was only natural for him to feel a sense of accomplishment in their lives and acceptance. He supposed that was part of what kept the species going on.

He listened to her deserved emotional outburst and James closed his eyes, for a while he didn't say anything. There were some scars so deep and so ragged that even he didn't bring them to light. Maybe it was because he was used to them, they had been there so long there was nothing left but to feel them like his arms or the air around him, but they were there. And it was foolishness to deny them. He took a long, sharp breath in before he opened his mouth,

"I never really knew me mum. She left when I were too young to know any better. She were a Zeltron, I dunno if she didn't fancy motherhood or if she figured she were better at riding poles than she were at raisin' kids but she were never there," he opened his eyes and looked at Triam with a sad half-smile, "It leaves--damage. Damage that lasts for life." He gave a sad chuckle, "And me? Ye tellin' me ye can't be a mum? Earlier today I beat a man to a bloody pulp and I gonna do it again tomorrow too. I wake up drinkin', I fall asleep with a different woman every night--I ain't 'xactly a model citizen. But do ye know who dun't care?"

He tapped the photos, "They dun't. They want someone who loves 'em. Someone who gives a damn enough to tuck 'em in at night, tell 'em they matter, and that they be special. It dun't matter who ye are, ye become the person they need ye to be when ye find out they are there."

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

Another silence followed James's moving words about the worth of a mother to a child. Triam looked down to her clasped hands. She was really, truly thinking, a gentle spark of what she knew to be inside of her somewhere... something she resisted, for fear of inadequacy. Fear of failure, had never been something to plague her heart before... though she had never been pressed so hard into the face of reality before, than now, it was easy to see why even a woman who danced with death would fear it.

Life was always more terrifying than death.

"There is a difference between a woman too cowardly to face the challenge of being a mother," She began to say, her voice hollow of her self, "... and a mother afraid her child will die because of her." A tear that had been welling for quite some time, finally streaked across her cheek.

"I carried our child into a battlefield... who's to say that battlefield won't follow me? I can no longer fight, because I've only ever fought for myself, and I never cared if it would be my last." With a heavy sigh, her human hand rose to wipe the solitary tear away, and to push the water away from her eyes, preventing further streaking. "I shouldn't condemn someone who has never lived, to die with me because I couldn't care less about the value of my own life... at the expense of theirs." She shook her head, her mind racing, trying to cope to the fears within her which she voiced... and she was not sure yet if voicing them diminished or strengthened the dark feelings within her heart.

"I shouldn't be responsible, for any more innocent lives... I alone know I am, for too many." She opened her mechanical hand, as her eyes tracked its movements. The only remnant of the first night she had killed a man in cold blood, and paid the price at the end of a lightsaber.

"I shouldn't be responsible for this life, because I'm afraid I'll take it as I have for all the others."

"Because it doesn't matter what they think of me if they're dead..."

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

James smiled painfully. He reached over and squeezed Triam's hand in a comforting squeeze. He didn't love Triam, but the spacer wasn't a monster, and he could tell that this was hard on her. When he found out about Brooklyn Justice--well, it was needless to say that his life was changed all the way. And what had it been for him to find out that Jess was there? And that they needed him? It rocked his world forever.

"I understand," he said, his voice low and husky. His rare side, a side few people ever saw of James showed. He could be empathic, but it was a rare thing. And for now--it was showing, "Its terrifyin'. A few months ago, Jess was captured by slavers. I ain't been letting her out of me sight since. And when Brook was shot at?" James shook his head, pursing his lips, "I brought her there, to the party and Jess were captuered here on me own city."

There were not words for the helplessness and guilt he felt when both instances had happened. Oh yes, there had been rage too, he had made those responsible suffer. And of course, he was protective as they came. But he felt guilt, for putting them in that situation. He had taken Brook to the party of mandos, he had set up camp and taken over this vice city. It was recklessness and it was his fault.

He gave her hand another squeeze.

"But I can tell ye what we both know; the galaxy is a dangerous place one way or the other," and if anyone could attest to it, he knew they both could with resounding yeses, "and its a lot safer when ye got a mum and a dad willin' to fight on ye behalf to protect ye. Something I know I ain't had."

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

Triam took hold of his hand as he took hers almost without knowing it. She understood that this was not a measure of intimacy, but of sympathy. If any should be able to comfort her, it's someone who's experienced what it's like to be thrusted into the duties of a single parent. He knew the hole she was in, and was offering her every consolation she needed to understand and remember how to live again. She sighed heavily after a long silence, and was silent a few moments more.

"You're right. Of course you're right. I'm not doing anything good by trying to wish this burden off of me, trying to deny that I am what I am." She paused, seeming to recollect herself a bit. "I always hated my mother... she never did anything but keep the house clean and keep me fed, even when dad was away. I know it wasn't easy for her, what with my fathers gambling and drinking... but he was a good man, and a soldier. He spoiled me a bit, when he could, turned me into a little brat." She smiled. "Told me his war stories that I guess, inspired me to become what I am now. Though," She frowned, "Only after he died"

"I won't be my mother," She concluded, "I won't let anything harm this child..." A familiar light seemed to return to her eyes, and although the weight of her responsibility seemed to crush her... she appeared to have gotten stronger just enough to lift them a little higher than before. She let go of James's hand, and despite her complete and utter unfamiliarity with the gesture, reached to embrace the man who had helped her dig herself out of her mental prison.

"Thank you," She would say over his shoulder.

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

"Fathers can be amazing things," James chuckled softly. "Afore dad disappeared he inspired me too. Showed me a lot of the things that made me the man I am today."

His dad, Eric, had been a scoundrel that James was more than glad to follow in the footsteps of. The man had flown recklessly, drank vicariously, shot relentlessly, smuggled prodigiously, and wooed masterfully. He had shown James what it meant to stand up for the little guy; the oppressed people, to fight for independence better than any Correllian had. James just wanted to make him proud.

He hugged Triam warmly, giving her back a gentle rub. His pheromones waffed softly from his skin in the subtle smell of calm that would hopefully help ease her mind a little more. When she broke, he smiled softly looking in her eyes.

"I know I ain't perfect, and if ye dun't want me involved, ye have every right ta that. But I'd like to help raise this child. Ye dun't have to do it alone," he waved to the cityline outside the massive widow, "I got hospitals, good doctors, apartments, safe houses, armies and fleets. I'd take care of this one with ye just like the rest of me own, if ye want me involved."

[member="Triam Akovin"]

 

[Cassus Akovin]

"I'm not used to being cared for..." She started to say as they withdrew from their mutual embrace. "... but I'm going to need everything I can get, and a father that wants to be involved is a great start." She said with a smile, still marred by stress, but significantly lessened from a heavy burden that had been weighing upon since Crol's announcement. Her eyes foretold of a gratefulness towards her present companion, even if they were stricken with a foggy uncertainty about the future.

"You have as much a right to this child, as it has a right to have me as its mother." Something fundamentally changed within Triam, it was small, very small... but it was enough to turn a situation that damned her in her eyes, into something that could be overcome. A challenge. An Akovin never backed down from a challenge, and while she made a thousand contingencies in her head, a thought also crept up about the future of her first born. It would be as much of a Justice as it would be an Akovin, and she wondered briefly if the galaxy was ready for the kind of hard headed stubborn intuition. She dispelled these thoughts for more practical and immediately relevant details. One of which, she decided to voice.

"I'm not going to be able to wear armor for nine months..." She said looking up towards nothing, her face slightly scrunched as she thought about the implications. This revelation dawned upon her, even if she may have had it before coming here (considering she wasn't wearing any coming in), it was apparent now that she had accepted reality. "Looks like I've already got something in the works for our business relationship."

Once more, life was business as usual for Triam Akovin.

[member="James Justice"]

 

[James Justice]

And just like that James was reminded he was dealing with a workaholic. If he had been given a situation like she was in, well he would have gone for as many libations as his body could hold. He in fact, had sorta. When Brook was discovered the spacer went on a drinking beige that lasted two weeks. Any lesser being would have been put in the hospital over it but James? he was no lightweight that was for sure.

"Whatever ye need to take care of this, if I can help, consider it done. A gift-a real gift," one with no strings attached. There was no denying that the spacer was a monster but he was partially responsible for why Triam was in this position and he wasn't going to make her pay for his part of this. The child deserved better and he would do better, damn it. He was glad that while things weren't exactly perfect they were working out better than they could have.

He knocked on one of the walls, a servant droid appeared, 'Bring me a bottle of ale and anything and everything the lady could use."

After the droid had her order and left, James turned back to Triam, "What do ye have in mind, as far as these propositions go?"

[member="Triam Akovin"]