The frayed ends of sanity...[Michael]

[Devorah Verd]

Ahto City.

Manaan.

The young woman had fled about as far as she could go, leaving Confederacy space behind, passing through neutral territory and planting herself in the Republic's backyard. On Manaan.

She, a woman who had grown up on Coruscant and never so much as stepped foot in a puddle, was standing on an entire planet of water. Devorah swallowed hard and tried not to think about that fact too much. Putting that thought out of her mind wasn't exactly difficult, however...there were so many other sordid, painful thoughts simply waiting to get back in.

He was still there, lingering in her mind, his laughter echoing in her ears, his presence forcing a shudder from her petite frame. Devorah moved into the sunlight from the shadow she'd been standing in, sighing softly as she tipped her face up to the sun.

Light.

Warmth.

It never failed to bring her comfort. To embrace her in spite of the darkness within her soul that she had accessed time and again to create weapons. Swords. His sword. The sword that bore her name. Guilt danced across her senses in sharpened stiletto heel, bringing pain in its wake. Memories came soon after, shredding her mind anew and bringing the dark back in.

Other sentients moved about her, going on about their daily business without a seeming care in the world. Power and energy coursed through her, flickering between her fingers as her thoughts did the same. With any luck, she mused, maybe today she could forget things a little while longer.


[member="Michael Sardun"]

 

[Arage Bao]

Republic Space​

Manaan​

Ahto City​

Approaching Dusk​

[member="Devorah Khaladan"]​

Manaan had been a testament to our failure as Guardians of the Galaxy, Ahto City was partially destroyed through our negligence and arrogance. It was Matsu, the former Jedi Master, who had struck the final blow and sank it back into the seas of its ancestors. She was imprisoned now, but I couldn’t help but consider how many more rogue Jedi were running around. Making a mockery of our values and traditions. It was a chilling thought.

I said ‘had been’ though. The Republic was reforming itself, and with it the Jedi Order which I had always cherished. Ahto City rises up from the depths of the ocean, and has reclaimed most of its former glory with the help of my Order and the Nation we serve. The feeling of chill is slowly evaporating, as more and more Jedi turn back to the true cause.

Maybe one day we will be what our progenitors had always strived to be.

I stood on one of the market platforms, behind me I could hear the merchants advertise their wares. It was a bustling market, and it made me feel joy. Joy that everything was turning back to normal. It showed that no matter what happened, we were capable of returning back to what once was.

My hands were firmly planted on the balustrade of the platform, the sun was setting and the ocean was calm this day. The tide going back and forth, back and forth in a repeating notion of peace.

I felt serenity on that moment, but it didn’t last long. I straightened my back, and casually turned around. Eyes scanning the crowd, until they found the source of my disturbance.

A woman, a bit short and about.. my age? I could feel her discontent, chaos brewed in her heart and her mind was all over the place.

Without considering a different approach, I closed my eyes and projected peace. Peace of mind and heart and soul, it was an Aura of Calmness and it affected the whole crowd. Not in a ‘BOOMKABAM’-way, of course.

It was a subtle effect, people straightened themselves out and smiles became more genuine. Haggling turned into laughter, and prices were set more fairly. It was Justice in the purest sense of the Force, and it was my hope that the woman would find its presence soothing.

I am not a Leader of Man, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t try.

 

[Devorah Verd]

It was difficult enough to remain in the midst of the bustling crowds, she mused, dark eyes blinking as she took small, tentative steps off to one side. Energy still coursed through her veins and threatened to spill out of her fingers, reminding her of the first time she'd channeled the darkness that had seemed to dwell within her soul.

The Forge, in the depths of Castle Netra; the potent miasma of dark energy dwelling Below in the nexus.

Devorah clenched her hands into fists, willing the damned memories to subside. She'd had enough of them attempting to drag her back into the world she'd only barely managed to escape.

That was not her.
That was not what she wanted.

The darkness did not suit her...it was an ill-fitting crown of thorns she'd had forced upon her. By someone she'd loved.

Another farce. Love. If she'd been in the state to laugh, she would have in that moment. Devorah let out the breath she'd been holding instead, sitting gingerly on the bench behind her. Soft and slow, a sense of calm pervaded her mind, unclenching her hands and instead folding them together in her lap. Shoulders released their tension and her posture relaxed as she breathed deep.

The scents of the food vendors in the market and the crisp, clean ocean air pervaded her senses and brought along a small sense of pleasure.

Perhaps, the young woman mused, she'd see about wandering about the market in a moment or two, but the padded bench beneath her was marvelously comfortable...and afforded a fascinating view of the bustling market crowd.

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Devorah Khaladan"]

The woman’s tension evaporated under the sun of my Calm, there was a fierce smile and a simple joy in this moment. This was what I was destined to do, help people. In any way possible.

And yet.. with all the calmness that spoke from her stature, I sensed the darkness in her heart had not receded. It was still there, festering and lingering; waiting for a moment of weakness to return itself.

I think it was the Force that guided me to casually sit next to the woman, my aura of valor retreated itself to a small bubble around us. The bustling crowd still retaining part of my touch, as smiles kept being and voices were cheery.

At first I didn’t speak, there was no reason to. A comfortable silence could mean more healing than a whole speech, my eyes scanned the crowd looking for.. well nothing really. But it’s hard to suppress the warrior in me, always on the look out for problems.

Eventually I did speak though, it was the right thing to do.

“Tough life?”

Didn’t say tough day, or tough week. The shadow around her was more than that, it took one to know one I am guessing.

 

[Devorah Verd]

Fingers twined together, legs crossed at the knee, she looked the picture of calm and collected, even with a tiny smile playing about her lips. The expression did not, however, reach her dark gaze, which remained haunted and tired in spite of the calm pervading the air.

Devorah sighed softly, the breeze off of the water toying with her cinnamon curls. Silken locks danced around her features as she sat perfectly still, and simply breathed in and breathed out. Fingers rested over her top knee, while her chestnut gaze flicked to the side at the approach of a stranger. The young woman tensed slightly, in spite of the peaceful calm that still slipped through her senses.

It was visceral reaction she couldn't have helped if she'd tried.

Blinking, she offered a tentative smile, clinging now to the calm that seemed hell bent on slipping away from her. The silence that hung between them was comfortable...but...her past was tainted with handsome faces and corrupt souls.

Devorah blinked as he spoke and tore her gaze away from his, dropping it to the fingers now twined tightly in her lap.

"You have no idea." she echoed softly, a slight smile flitting across her features.

 

[Arage Bao]

After everything I had been through I think I could imagine it perfectly, but I just met the lass. I ain’t gonna share with her my life story, or my troubles and doubts. This ain’t some kind of drama holomovie flick, in real life people don’t walk up to each other and start sharing everything all at once.

But then again, some people keep telling me, I ain’t a normal man. Might be they are right about that, so I offered her a little nugget. A small peek behind the curtain, if you will.

“You have felt the touch of darkness in your heart, and it frightens you. In those moments when the shadows seem to consume you.. you did or wanted to do things which you regret and maybe even fill you with horror.”

I studied the skyline, birds flying ignorant in their freedom. My mouth continued to make words, and I filled them with calmness.

“During your moments in the light, there is a small part of you which craves for the dark. You fight it, but it’s getting stronger and stronger. And now you are on a crossroads, you were able to outsmart the Darkness. You left the place of horror and temptation, but you do not know what to do with yourself now.”

I turned my head to her, eyes catching hers.

“How’s that?”

 

[Devorah Verd]

Blinking, her chestnut gaze flicked from his profile to the bustling sentients before them, their warm, cheerful voices suddenly dancing across her nerves like so many irritants. Devorah breathed deeply of the light ocean air and refused to reach out to the darkness that beckoned to her so intimately.

She shook her head in an effort to clear it, before he began speaking, but found her attention drawn completely to his words and the stark truth they bore. Dark eyes grew wide as she shifted in her seat, setting a few more inches distance between them, pain flickering visibly across her features.

She'd done so much...endured so much...she didn't know if she'd ever be able to speak of it to another living being. Yet here was a complete stranger who read her like an open book with a single glance. Her mouth fell open as she stared at him, his words trailing off as he caught her gaze.

Devorah's cheeks turned a bright crimson as she averted her gaze out of pure shame, staring instead at her hands in her lap.

"Far too accurate." she whispered in response after several silent moments, hands twisting nervously together.

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Devorah Khaladan"]

I saw her shame and knew it well, but here was a key difference between me and all the other inhabitants of this galaxy. I wasn’t afraid. Not anymore at least, I knew my faults and my sins. I accepted myself as I was, and wasn’t afraid to admit my persona.

“Accurate for a reason, my Lady.”

For a while I contemplated what I would do next, this woman was troubled. Of this I was certain, and she needed help. But pushing further.. it would only make her drift away, and that would need heal her.

In the end I tried something else.

“My name is Michael Sardun.”

The founder of the Army of Light, beacon of hope across the Galaxy or so I have been told. I never wanted this status of being a personal messiah, being the Exalted General of the common folk.

But it had one good thing: People paid attention when you were that man.

I raised myself out of the sitting position, and gave her a bow.

“If you ever are in need of guidance, you may come to me. I know very well how hard it can be to live with a shadow in your heart, I can help you. But only if you let me.”

Then.. I offered her my hand, extended it towards her.

She might take it, and make a new journey. Or stay here, and live in fear and despair.

 

[Devorah Verd]

[member="Michael Sardun"]


The tightness in her chest that made breathing difficult refused to recede. His voice threaded through the air between them, but the words were lost on her, mind too preoccupied with pain and despair to absorb meaning and intent.

His name. He'd given his name.

Why did it resonate and sound so very familiar? Devorah blinked and gazed over at him, chestnut gaze studying his features in profile. There was strength there, she decided, certainty of purpose, and a strong sense of self. She looked away as he rose from his seated position, catching his formal bow out of the corner of her gaze.

Rhys had been a gentleman at first as well. Courted her. Swept her off her feet with pretty words and a handsome face. Had manners and a sense of decorum that was unheard of on the street level of Coruscant where even the sun didn't penetrate. Isley too, was handsome, and had at first been attentive and loving as a sibling should be.

But those faces had been mere masks for the monsters beneath.

Devorah took in a deep, ragged breath, eyes flicking from his outstretched hand to his face, searching his gaze for...what, she'd not be able to say. Something told her to take his hand, her own rising to reach out, but not quite touch his. She blinked, and expelled the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding in. She reached with her mind instead, dipping into the Force as she did so.

The tightness in her chest eased - he was warm and bright to her senses, comforting, even. Something no one she had met in the Confederacy had been.

Her delicate hand rested in his a moment later, her petite frame rising from her seat. Her mind withdrew, not wanting him to see any more of the darkness and horror she harbored within.

She had to live with it. No one else needed to know.

"How?" she asked, simple word and soft of voice, forcing her gaze up from their hands to meet his own.

 

[Arage Bao]

[member="Devorah Khaladan"]

I breathed in and felt the air flow into my lungs, giving me another moment of life. Her darkness was subtle, disturbing and conflicted. She had encountered cruelty from the people around her, and had difficulty trusting people. It was a fact plain as the day to me, and it made me want to fix it. Give her someone to trust, and show her that not everyone was a self-centered egomaniac who was only concerned with his own quarks.

She asked me how, and that made me pause. How does one heal a broken spirit? I was no healer of men, some called me a leader and even that I would dispute. But I couldn’t contest that men followed me, how does one heal a broken spirit? The question resounded with me and I wasn’t sure what to answer. I had experience with this yes, my own being was one full of darkness and every day standing was a battlefield won against my own demons.

Finally, I found something that I could tell her. It wasn’t much, but it was something to relate to her. Make her understand that one cannot simply heal someone elses affliction, you have to want it yourself. More important, you have to do it yourself. The only thing I could do was show her the path, and give her a place she could call a home. Together with people she could call friends.

From there.. it would be her own journey.

“We all have our demons, my Lady. I will show you the path to accept them and yourself. From there, you will have to do the walking.”

 

[Devorah Verd]

"I think I can manage that."

A small smile appeared on her lips, warming her features and her expression considerably from the apprehension that seemed so permanently affixed there. It was still present, set in the tightness of her shoulders and the slight tension around her eyes, but it was lighter.

With a faint sigh, Devorah picked up her bag from the bench and set the strap on her shoulder, gaze returning to the sight of her hand still within Michael's grasp. It was certainly something, she mused, especially when she could not remember the last time she'd been treated with such kindness.

Her mother had held her hand the day she'd been abandoned.

Her husband had held her hand before he'd begun to beat her.

Her brother had held her hand while he claimed he knew what was best for her.

She did not remember her mother very well, and she still could not think of Rhys and Isley with anything other than revulsion and horror overtaking her senses. Out of self preservation, she pushed the thoughts from her mind and did her best to think only of now and how things had been changing since she'd fled Krant. Things were already better, she reminded herself, and although not yet ideal, It seemed that Michael was to be the last piece of her puzzle.

The final key for the final lock...good gods. She was going to drown herself in metaphors on a world of water.

Lifting her free hand to pinch at the bridge of her nose, Devorah took a deep, steadying breath and savored the ocean breeze that rippled around her. Another deep breath and slow exhalation, and she looked up at Michael once more, silently taking in his features once more, tilting her head as she did. She realized she was staring after a few moments of mutual silence, and managed a bit of a blush as she absently smoothed out her sweater.

"My name is Devorah. Devorah V-" she stopped herself from mentioning her familial name, bile rising in her throat at the remembrance of it. The young woman cleared her throat and continued, smile only wavering slightly. "-Khaladan...recently arrived from Krant. Not a Lady...though I do appreciate your use of the word."


[member="Michael Sardun"]