Steadfast, the flames of failure.

[WolfMortum]

Bastion of Ren,​

Virgillia.​

Recovering from the recent battle with death, Brennan Cabrol lay upon bloodied sheets, his body resisting the cybernetic modifications dealt to him in order to save his life in an attempt to further serve the First Order and the will of Seiger Ren. Back upon Bespin, he had sought to give his life for the cause when finding himself pitted against three foes who were proving his better. Their blades carved through his flesh like a hot knife did butter, his legs severed at the knees, his left arm taken from the shoulder and his hip cut through to the mid-section where his lower spine had been severed and in what he had thought were his last breaths, he had torn the place asunder with the ignition of two Incendiaries hoping to take them all down with him. He knew not the state of their lives to date, since the operation that now left him bed-ridden and rested upon his back, every inch of his torso rife in pain and fueling his frustrations picturing his enemy as vividly as he did that day, his aggression was beginning to take shape upon the faces of those who had been instructed to assist him. Already he had managed to get rid of the assistants the First Order had brought in, forcing them to opt for someone of greater experience in one of the Knights of Ren's own people, [member="Kayla Wylen"] of whom Brennan had been told was both incredibly gifted but so too a Disciple like himself, giving him far more confidence in their ability purely on that basis and being forced to temper his behavior as there would no doubt be further consequences should he seek to intimidate or betray the truth of his mood before her.

He had failed in his mission, he had killed one of their own due to the Jedi's manipulation of their movements and had been unsuccessful in taking down the enemy. Giving his life for the cause had been his redemption and yet that chance had been taken from him by the First Order when they kept him from the brink of death. Why, he didn't understand. He struggled to comprehend the social interactions and cognitive and emotional patterns of others, his path was paved by direction and purpose since the Sith had killed off the life he had first hoped to live. The Jedi Order had failed to protect him and all those he had come to love and in his years of captivity and torture, his path had finally led him to the First Order. When he had given all that he could give for them, ready and willing to die for them and trying, they had brought him back. They had done more for him than anyone else had, and most significantly was the reinforcement behind the fact that he had always found their methods, their dictatorship and imperialist ways to give them the ability to succeed where others failed; weakness spread from one corner of the Galaxy to the next yet here, even in his failure, the Knights of Ren stood firm in Order. The hand of the Supreme Leader upon their shoulders.

It was to become another chapter in Brennan's life, the final death of his former self and the reintegration and rediscovery of who he was to become in the shadow of the Ren. It was going to be trialing, to come to terms with what had happened, to overcome the hatred that so threatened to consume him. His former Mentor within the Jedi now living upon Commenor was but a footnote of his frustrations at the time, pushed back in the darkest depths of his mind his intolerance for their kind redirected towards the Galactic Alliance, the real enemy of progress in the galaxy. As he awaited whatever company Kayla Wylen was to bring him, he vowed within himself that he would strike hard and fast against their aggressors to make up for his shortcomings. At this point, he was anything but worthy of standing amongst them, in his eyes.

 

[Kayla Wylen]

Although Kayla wasn't found anywhere in the battles with the Galactic Alliance on Hoth and Bespin she had more than her hands full with tending to the injured Ren. They had valiantly fought and risked their lives to protect the peace and stability created by the First Order. The S'ktri saw them as the unsung heroes of the galaxy, a group she would stand behind for as long as she lived. She was no warrior like most, it wasn't her calling. Instead she took it upon herself to be the support, someone they could always fall back on, in and out of combat. Guided by the Light she looked to bring salvation and relief, and to provide whatever was needed in the heat of battle. It was her wings that was her greatest tool in fulfilling her role, allowing her to quickly go to where she was needed.

Today however the woman would not need to take flight. She walked through the hallways of the Bastion after having paid a quick visit to yet another wounded ally, although the Knight's injuries were relatively minor. A few days of rest would ensure his full recovery, and all that needed to be done was a routine checkup to see everything was still in order. The next Ren was a different story, however. The Disciple who according to her notes went by the name of [member="Caehl Ren"] had suffered severe injuries, that by all accounts should have been lethal. It had been a close call, Kayla was told. Many cybernetics had to serve as replacements for severed and damaged limbs, which required the utmost amount of care in the early stages of recovery. Other medical personnel that did not carry the name of Ren had been unable to keep the Disciple calm enough to do their work, causing Kayla to be the one who was now in charge of overseeing his progress. Her remarkable ability to stay calm and focussed in nearly every situation imaginable was something that hadn't gone unnoticed and was the reason she was the one who was turned to first, and she saw no reason to object to performing her duty.

When Kayla arrived at the door of Caehl Ren's quarters she gently knocked on the door before letting herself in, watching her head as she entered. The Bastion was not built with the avarage length of S'kytri in mind, but the woman quickly learned to be careful around doorways. Her wings were folded up behind her as she entered, giving the bedridden man a respectful nod. "My name is Kayla Wylen. I will be overseeing your recovery." She was not a person of many words, although that didn't mean she didn't try to be as friendly as possible. Her tone was warm and caring, a reflection of how she felt inside.

 

[WolfMortum]

Turning, Brennan looked to the new arrival, his brows furrowing beneath the bandages that wrapped around his head, looking to her in uncertainty for the origin of her race, these wings that she bore a most foreign concept to him in sentience, the kind that were shared between humans in their made up folk tales of apparitions and deities. "What are you?" Brennan spoke up in response, voicing the question and his interest in her noted appearance, his voice coming through muddied by the vocal inhibitor lodged within his throat, a slight haze to his words as it seemed to be malfunctioning and causing him pain as he spoke to her. Grimacing, he let loose a low muffled sound something akin to a discontented growl, dried blood in the back of his throat causing a rather uncomfortable itch though compared to the rest of his injuries was negligible. Kayla Wylen, not a name he had heard of before yet that being said he was neither one to speak out or require a great deal of conversation with the others in order to move forward in service to their Order. His current incapacitation seemed to remind him of just how small and insignificant he was in the mix of things, a means of being humbled he supposed, viewing it not as a negative but as a reality that he was still just a piece in the revolving wheel that circled Seiger Ren's ambitions, his pain a non-factor and a sacrifice that was little in the face of the overall objective, Order through strength in the Galaxy.

His stomach curled within itself, churning as nausea seemed to come at him with another belt. With the addition of the Ocular Neural Interface to replace the loss of his left eye, the change to his visual acuity was not something that came without it's own struggles to adapt to. His vision was unrefined, his control over the implant was based upon his cognitive balance yet his body was taking it's time to accept the foreign entity and with the imbalance to his eyes, the right natural while the left seemed to change in magnification and visual modes, infra-red and the like, he had found it easy to keep his eyes shut so to stave off the feeling of motion sickness.

"How long have you been with us?"

He turned to look back to the female, [member="Kayla Wylen"] not wholly confident in her given their lack of previous experience together yet she had been instructed to reside over his recovery and thus someone must have seen something to warrant her authorization. Brennan was simply trying to gain a better idea of who he was dealing with.

 

[Kayla Wylen]

As [member="Caehl Ren"] spoke it was clear doing so caused him pain, something Kayla immediately scribbed down in the notebook she was carrying. It was something that would have to be looked at, but because she was without the proper tools she was not able to do immediately. She kept a rather serious face as she wrote, her head tilted downwards towards the pages. "It seems the vocabulator didn't settle perfectly. I will make sure it will be looked at as soon as possible, but I cannot promise it will be made a priority seeing there still are others who are in quite grave conditions. I will do my best, though." When the woman finished writing the last bit down, she preferred pen and paper for making notes, she closed the notebook and laid it down on the small desk that was part of the room's interior. She looked over to the bedridden man and smiled, able to address his question now that she had nothing that had to be remembered until she continued the checkup. "I'm sorry I did not immediately answer your question, I do not want to forget anything important and I made a habit of writing such things down immediately." Kayla had her perculiar ways of keeping her mind orderly and calm to make sure everything of importance would be handled. It often made her seem a bit distant emotionally, but in reality she deeply cared for everyone within the Ren. "I am a S'kytri. They originate from the planet Skye." She didn't mention that going there was signing a death wish for her. Tradition dictated that all males were to be blue-skinned and all females green-skinned, and all that weren't were to be killed before their eggs even hatched. The First Order had protected her from such a fate. "I get that question a lot, which I do not mind. It is better to ask than stay silent." She didn't say more than necessary, but in the current situation she was to speak more than normal in order to provide the best possible care to the injured Ren.

Through the Force Kayla sensed the nausea that overcame Caehl as her light-touched aura brushed against his darkened presence, making her reach for her notebook once again. Her pen clicked as she looked over to the Disciple once again. "Sorry, I will answer your question in a moment. I sense nausea within you, could you describe the feeling? Perhaps I can find the source of it." She flipped a few pages to find the details she had copied from a datapad into her notebook, reading over the information. "It may be from the Ocular Neural Interface, but I cannot say for sure without anything more to go on. Is it changing modes or perhaps shifting magnification on its own?" It was the first thing her mind told her it could've been, so it was the first thing she asked about.

The S'kryti's mind reminded her of the question she was asked as she sat down on the chair at the desk, causing her to shift her focus. "Sorry again, I almost forgot the question. I was enrolled into the Academy on Hoth when I was three years old and recently fully accepted as a Disciple. After that I was moved to Virgillia and the Bastion." She had been busy ever since settling here, but there was not a single complaint to be heard from her. It was her duty, one she gladly fulfilled. "I have been extensively trained in the medical field, and use that knowledge both on and off the battlefield." The piece information was one she often added, knowing it almost always put the ones she tended to at ease. Kayla then quickly moved back to her checkup, bringing her pen back to the paper. "I will get to the standard checkup routine shortly, such as replacing bandages and the like. Is there anything in particular that you would like to bring to my attention? Things such as returning pains, tech that is not functioning properly, and other things such as those. I can see if I can help you, and if not I can pass the information on so it can be looked at more closely."

[member="Caehl Ren"]

 

[WolfMortum]

[member="Kayla Wylen"] was indeed intuitive when it came to her medicinal works, surprisingly accurate in her assumptions or rather equations made off of his few movements and grimaces that she could adequately deduct from his symptoms the nature of his frustrations and quiet suffering. Brennan was not accustomed to playing the victim nor being the helpless fool feeling as he currently was, immobile and unable to live and breath on his own. The contempt that he had found against the Jedi had grown tenfold in the days that he had regained consciousness and having to conform to socializing with others, something that he struggled to adjust to in itself, he loathed the position he was in and yearned to get out there once more to continue to train and hone his skills that he might restore some of the confidence the others will no doubt have lost in his place as a Disciple of Ren. Trying to restrain himself from wanting to get up from the bedding, he lifted his gaze to stare up at the roof of his quarters while listening to her response. He had never come across these S'kytri before, her race was as foreign to him as her presence within the Bastion had been. That the Knights of Ren continued to bring in more and more disciples, ones as skilled as she seemed to be, reassured him somewhat that even in the face of such adversity they were not being held back from bringing peace to their territories, nor fending off their aggressors.

"Your apologies are not necessary, we are both Disciples here and you have done me no wrong" he remarked first on her knack for apologizing where she needed not do, twice she had sought to make up for her not answering him immediately following his queries and while she appeared to be nothing less than efficient in her dealings, the sentiment was of no use to Brennan Cabrol. "Most unusual is the way we Disciples are treated within the Order of Ren. Expected to obey yet too held upon mutual level with our superiors. Often I've been encouraged to acknowledge individuality. Perhaps this is something you would do better than I" he turned to glance back in her direction though did not hold the glance for long as his ocular receptors soon continued to malfunction, the vision of his left eye shifting to thermal, where her body would be engulfed in white while the rest of the room would darken and the heat from her body was emphasized beyond all things. The sudden discomfort did not come without it's opportunity however as his nausea did indeed seem to jump forward with the sudden change again. Closing his right eye, he focused on the vision that the implant relayed, forcing himself to sit up, his torso shooting back up his pain with immense pain and forcing him to grit his teeth together and defy the sorrow of his natural body in order to better experience this visual prowess. "Thermal vision. My perception seems to be heightened in my left side yet my right...Struggles to keep up with it...-A detestable fault if I am to be forced to prioritize one before the other".

Visual impairment would hold him back no doubt upon the battlefield; silently he questioned the possibility of creating something to remedy this. Some sort of modular facial masking that could serve as his way of better appealing to the approach of others not wishing to look upon his marred appearance whilst also catering for this singular vision, perhaps even molding his visual acuity to be seen through one lens or visor. FOSB would no doubt hold some answers to such a possibility and if not then perhaps he would be forced to improvise and devote his time into devising one himself, he did not seem to be going anywhere any time soon after all.

"How long do you believe I will be stuck in this place for, I am...-Eager to leave".

 

[Kayla Wylen]

A slight nod was seen coming from Kayla as [member="Caehl Ren"] mentioned her tendency to apologize. "I have been told I come off as somewhat uncaring sometimes due to the way I work. I am glad you are not bothered by it, in any case." She wasn't very emotional either, unlike most of the other Ren who used those emotions to fuel their connection to the Force. As a follower of the Light instead of the Darkness she did not do so however, instead she connected with the Force through a near-constant state of inner peace and serenity. Perhaps this was a good thing in her dealings the man she was tending to at that moment, though. No matter what the woman wanted to see him return to strength, so she would do whatever she could to make that happen. In this, among many other things, her will and her duty aligned. "Please, if you do have any concerns, do not hesitate to speak out. I am here to aid you and I wish to fulfil my duty to the best of my abilities."

Caehl then moved on to talk about the place of the Disciples within the Ren, the words causing the s'kytri to think for a moment. She did not communicate much with the others apart from what was expected from her, even if she often wished for someone to talk to just for the sake of talking. In the end she could do without however, and kept her focus on what was important. "Knowing your allies, the ones who are there to stand with you, is important. It simply isn't possible to suppress who you are, but using it to create bonds with those allies will serve to strengthen everyone's resolve and connection to the collective." Kayla simply answered from the heart, as it was the only way she knew. "In the end, we are to trust one another without question. Doubt leads to hesitation and hesitation could mean the difference between life and death, and between success and failure." The trust she had put into the abilities of the Ren was unwavering. They were true warriors and defenders of stability and in combat she would need their trust in her to be right behind them in the heat of battle. To get them back in after injury, or if said injury was too great, get them home safely to recover, but also provide whatever else was needed. She was no warrior, but she was there for those who were so they did not have to know fear.

Kayla sensed nausea flare up within the man once again, and when he shot up and she sensed his agony the woman quickly but in a collected way laid her notebook down on the desk, got off the chair, and moved towards the bed. She did not interrupt him as he spoke, but did lay a hand on his shoulder and looked to gently push him back down. When he finished she started speaking herself, but didn't immediately move towards the topic of his eye implant. "I cannot suggest getting up just yet, I'm afraid. You may aggravate your injuries and prolong the time you will spend recovering. Try to move as little as possible for the time being, it is imperative you give your body rest." With her hand still on his shoulder she sent a slight warmth into Caehl through the Force, looking to relieve his pain. It was only a small pulse however. It was a way of testing the waters, having had mixed reactions to doing so due to the Darksided nature of the vast majority of the Ren. Where some of them accepted it and were grateful for it, others reacted badly and would start acting more aggressively towards her, often disregarding their injuries. "Hm, I have heard that was a side-effect that happens to some. I am not specialized in cybernetics, but I will pass this along as soon as I finish up here. Perhaps they have a remedy for it that can immediately be implemented. Again, this is not my specialty, so I cannot guarantee much I'm afraid." The blue-skinned woman kept the information in the forefront of her mind, ready to write it down the moment she would return to the desk to add to her current set of notes.

The fellow disciple asked a question many others before him had asked. It was always a tough one to answer and this was especially true in this case. "I cannot say for sure. It all depends on how quickly your body adapts to the cybernetic replacements and this can vary quite wildly from person to person. Some adapt to it within a week, for some it takes months. I am sorry that I cannot give a better estimation, but I have no way to calculate it more precisely." Only after having laid down Caehl Kayla would walk back to her notebook and write down the man's observations about the ocular receptors to be passed along to those with the means of remedying the situation.

 

[WolfMortum]

"It has often been expressed to me that I carry a certain lack of empathy toward others" Caehl responded in [member="Kayla Wylen"]'s remark about being too possibly uncaring to her patients, further explaining himself, "Sentimentality is something that I've learned to detach myself from for personal benefit. The sympathy of my peers is irrelevant to my productivity within the Knights of Ren, I need only the approval of authority over my duty thus you need not question yourself"; this was arguably the most reassuring thing Brennan had spoken out for towards the sake of anyone outside of himself, his form of encouragement or vote of confidence though naturally in his mind it was simply fact, part of his day to day mindset and not a result of the cybernetics though they did make him appear to be more in part, droid in appearance, this lack of emotion was the product of the Sith's cruelty and the Jedi Order's weakness before coming to find the First Order and his rightful place within it.

Their conversation shifted to the notion of their allies and as unlikely as it seemed to someone the likes of Caehl, friendly relations within the First Order that they might look to trust upon. In his mind trust was something that was demanded in their duty. It could be broken as easily as someone could turn to defect from the First Order, turn traitor and fight against them; the principles were all the same and the personal relevance didn't factor in as he, despite Kayla's opinion, had thus-far managed to suppress all of the person he had once been. If he was fortunate enough, the old naive young boy that had been a hopeful Jedi Padawan would never again surface within him, a weak and disgusting waste of life and potential, he was something else entirely now with a newfound strength of will, one molded by the Supreme Leaders own. There was no need to factor in further here however, contributing to this end may only shed doubts of the medics towards his state of mind and impair his potential recovery, a risk he did not intend to take as the days were growing longer and his patience was waring thin with all the time he had been left to contemplate his failure, bedridden and frustrated.

Her hand took to his shoulder as he had sought to sit forward, his gaze took to her own at the touch for which there was a brief glimpse of malice, a discomfort for her having made contact yet it was only instinctive, he was not accustomed to being cared for by others, let alone being reliant upon them for his survival like some helpless worm, the look of aggression subsided quickly and his submission would hopefully be taken as his acceptance, allowing himself to be halted and pushed back to the beds surface against all the contempt he had now come to hold for his quarters. The Disciple Chambers were none too catering to the individual, most rooms were shared with other members yearning to make their place in the Order. Caehl Ren had initially shared a room himself though over time his confrontation and attitude towards his peers had seen to an inevitable conflict of interests and his last room mate had requested ulterior arrangements. Just as well given his status now, he might well have exerted himself in all the anger that was burning within him towards the Jedi of the Alliance, the nuisance of a constant presence would only aggravate him further.

Something turned within him however, connecting with him on a level beyond the physical. At first it felt so foreign and yet turning to look to Kayla believing his implants to be having some sort of reaction, the look of concentration she held followed with the presence of the force around her convinced him otherwise, the warmth that was travelling through his body, eating away at the pain could be associated with the healing arts of Curato Salva if he wasn't mistaken, though that wasn't the only likely option, it was the familiar one to which he could relate the feeling to having experienced in the past. It brought an uncomfortable feeling to the pit of his stomach, the comfort that it brought him feeding the anxiety of his sub-conscious, the lightside of the force breaching into the presence of a being fueled so vastly by darkness, in reaching in to his pool of energies, Kayla would no doubt feel the raw emotion that ran livid through him. No one before her had tried to connect so deeply with his presence within the Force like this since life back upon the world of Svivren, he had kept himself forever masked from allowing others to come to close to potentially compromising his personal security yet the sudden revelation that she might be allowed to pick up on more than he was willing to portray to others forced his aura to frenzy, darkness swelling around him, her gentle touch upon his shoulder being swiftly rejected so that she would be shut out from further telepathic communication, further intervention through the use of force practice least she gain his approval in the future.

"That is enough, I will survive" he spoke quickly, though he held no resentment in his words he merely wished to conclude the moment in order to move forward with whatever practice was required for his recovery while too masking his vulnerability. "I will avoid strenuous activities for the time being. Perhaps meditation will help move the time along...".

 

[Kayla Wylen]

Kayla simply nodded when [member="Caehl Ren"] spoke about his detachment from sentimentality and empathy. In that way the two were different, where the man seemed to be distant by choice, she only seemed to be. Interaction with others was something she found joy in, despite it being very much exhausting. The only answer she gave to him was a thoughtful nod, wishing to not meddle in his life. Knowing he understood her reasoning for her more methodical approach to tending to the wounded. She found satisfaction and happiness in helping her allies still, her care for them unwavering. This deeper care for them was often rejected due to the Darksided nature of their being, but that didn't deter her.

A similar kind of rejection, one that was common, was to the s'kytri's attempt to relieve Ceahl's pain through usage of the Force. The discomfort and anxiety that came from him was palpable, and so she quickly decided to raise her hand from his shoulder to break the connection. It wasn't anything deep-reaching, but only a slight wave of the Force that she sent through the bedridden man. It was to test the waters seeing the previous rejections, but she always looked to do as much as possible. The limit was with her ability and what the people she tended to would allow, and unless it was absolutely necessary she would not overstep that limit. "Some react to it differently than others. It was not my intention to surface those feelings within you, sorry," she said after noting down additional things in her notebook back over at the desk in the room.

"Meditation has helped me greatly in the past, so that is most definitely a fine idea." With the hand he held the notebook in Kayla closed it, putting the pen in the holder on the side of it afterwards. "Is there anything else I can do for you? If not, I will leave you in peace so you can rest."