Private Life; As We Know It [Kyra Perl]

[Caedyn Arenais]

Coruscant, Heart of the Core Worlds.

Change. It was as consistent in the Galaxy as the passing of time, and perhaps for some, it was difficult to accept. For Caedyn Arenais, the first sign of change had been back when his Padawan sought to go after her Sister, intent on leaving for Sith Space alongside Thirdas Heavenshield without the need of her Master. It was a moment that Caedyn had realized that she was coming into her own as an adult and a Jedi. Letting her go had not been easy, but it had been the right thing to do for Kyra and so he had done so, against his own need to keep her safe and within Comm's reach.

Time had passed and Kyra Perl had eventually returned to Kashyyyk only to find herself confronted with the sense of change, things not as they were prior to her leave, or perhaps she, not the same Padawan since experiencing all that she had. Caedyn had more assumptions than he did clues in towards her own mind and reckoning, yet he had also been a part of this change with the inheriting responsibilities over Mnemosyne and not being actively serving every day under the Order of the Silver Jedi as he once had.

Still, there was one thing that had not changed, and that was his care for his Apprentice, as well as the commitment he had made to her.

Kyra had not exactly been forthcoming with her whereabouts, yet reluctantly she had caved to Caedyn's continued holonet messages and disclosed where she had been staying of recent days. A Hotel & Restaurant on Coruscant, not the worst of choices, although not exactly the most popular of locales. Perhaps that was part of the appeal.

The Jedi Knight had arrived via The Repertoire, far more subtle than the likes of the Vagabond Heavy Cruiser. From there he had been walking the street, deciding to see the sights while he searched for any hint of his Apprentice, given that she had not been at the proposed coordinates. Catching a hint of a Force Signature, he had wandered into what seemed to be more of a clubbing type district, filled with plenty of peoples more intoxicated than not and Caedyn suddenly feeling like he stuck out like a sore thumb.

Hopefully, his Padawan wouldn't be in quite as bad a state as the couple that tripped up over themselves trying to walk on by.

 

[Kyra Perl]

Days meant nothing to Kyra. Calendars were a concept of the past, when her schedule had been made down to the minutes. Life was different now than it was a year ago.

She tried not to think on it.

She tried not to linger at all. It made it all too easy to miss her agreed upon arrangement with Caedyn; all too easy for the padawan to forget it had a master. But even that was a convenient lie. She had remembered, for a moment, that she was meant to be be seeing Caedyn today. She just hadn't realized it in time. There was no way she'd face him like this.

She had a bit more respect for him than that.

And so the girl sat at the bar of the club, half drunk, half high on a spice that kept her head in the sky. Anything to not touch down and face the reality of what was around her. It wasn't even nightfall, but there were enough faces around to fuel the place with life. She felt none of it, not even when the chattering guy besides her leaned in and slid his hand up the short edge of her skirt.

Not a single, flickering emotion.

Imagine that.

She tossed her drink back and slid off her stool, taking the stranger's offer to dance.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

After enough time wandering the streets near to the vicinity of Kyra Perl 's hotel, Caedyn eventually stumbled upon the familiar presence of his Padawan; It was faint and...-irregular, but it was there and enough to go on for Caedyn to follow a direction.

While he might have been frustrated with her for not showing back during the days of their living within the Silver Rest, things these days weren't quite so black and white, and their former routines of training had well and truly gone out the proverbial window, not just for Kyra but also for Caedyn himself. Change had a way of doing that, throwing life topside and leaving you having to adapt or tumble through a tough learning curve, much like Kyra was as he would soon learn.

Along with his Padawan's presence in the Force came the audible thumping of bass, music loud enough to reach the street outside as the man stood before the entrance to some sort of bar or nightclub. The sun still hung out overhead, and yet this place seemed to be brimming with activity, Coruscant able to achieve the non-stop partying that left Caedyn feeling sorry for those having to wake the next day...-Or night..-Whichever!

Wandering into the establishment, hoping that he might somehow be wrong and that his Padawan wasn't truly at such a place, he couldn't lie to himself against his better judgement. Kyra was still young and this kind of scene wasn't exactly off-character for her when she fell on hard times. Oh how he prayed that she wouldn't be curled up in the corner somewhere or force knows under what sort of influence...

He had found her at an opportune time it seemed, stepping into the room just in time to see her being led towards the dancing floor as the lights flared and waved across the room, causing him to squint against their glare.

'She's going to hate me for this...' he thought, yet hesitated none...

"This one's under-age" Caedyn's voice spoke up loud enough for the male to hear as he reached for his Padawan's arm, stepping in their way; "An honest mistake I'm sure, and not one you want others to hear about" he discouraged the gent, looking to Kyra with a stern eye.

"Time to go".

 

[Noelle Varanin]

.

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra didn't feel the guy disperse. What ounce of attention she had to spare was locked erratically on Caedyn. A kaleidoscope of emotions passed through her, from confusion to fear, to anger, then embarrassment, the padawan wavered before her Master.

"Time to go."

She gave a small, numb nod, aware enough to feel shame for the state he had found her in. As feckless as she acted around her family, she would have never dared to pull this with Caedyn. Yet here she was, weeks out from dodging his existence and looking like hell for it.

The urge to bolt hit her, her muscles coiling as they hit fresh air.

"I'm not a minor anymore," she rationalized, jerking to a stop. "I'm eighteen. I'm of age."

Never mind that she had ditched him for drugs and booze. He had missed her birthday, he was in no right.

Caedyn Arenais

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

The male who had been in Kyra Perl 's company seemed to catch on quick that this was an affair they were too intoxicated for, not wishing to share in any of the tension and raising both hands in resignation while Caedyn was intent on getting his Padawan out of there.

"I'm not a minor anymore, I'm eighteen. I'm of age," she argued as they stepped out into the light of day.

"Sure, you're of age in the Colonies. In the Core last I checked it was twenty-one" Caedyn retorted, now turning to look her over given that he could see properly. The blazing lights from within the Club were bound to give him an aneurism were he to stay long enough.

Of course, trying to convince a teenager to see reason on a good day was a mission in and of itself, let alone one who had been taking in substances that Caedyn dread to wonder. Force forbid someone were to insult her, and she the empath turn to her lightsaber for defence...-Something she'd never do sober of course, but then Caedyn had seen some very impressionable drunks in his time.

"We were supposed to be meeting at your Hotel..." he reminded her, his hand letting go of her arm now that he had gotten her free of the stranger, and away from the deafening scene. It was bad enough they seemed to go such lengths between visits these days, but to find her in a state like this...Caedyn rubbed his temple, his head shaking in disappointment.

In her state, anything he was to say could well be forgotten by the next day, depending on how much she had used/taken.

"What exactly have you had?" he asked against his better judgement, needing to be sure that she wasn't going to be a risk to herself...-Or any more than she had been already. Kyra had always had a knack for keeping things interesting, but this was something else...

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra rubbed her arm, obsessing over the finger prints as if he had almost chopped the whole arm off. He hadn't. Her overstimulated system only made it feel that way. She shrugged at the question, a mix between obstinate and abashed. She could rattle off all sorts of excuses. She could play dumb, or resist, or run off. She did none of that with Caedyn.

She knew better.

She wrapped her arms around herself, shivering against the warm day air.

"Nothing bad," she dismissed. Because in truth she didn't even know anymore. She looked sharply around them, eyes jolting every which way as she adjusted to the street he had led them too. It would be prudent of her her to then apologize, or offer an explanation, or even start to bring them back to the hotel. She did none of that. The world felt incredibly bright and still now that they left the loud dampness of the club.

She felt small.

She shied back a step. "Listen, if this is about me punching that jedi..."

Caedyn Arenais

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"Nothing bad, huh?" Caedyn repeated sceptically, knowing full well you didn't get into such states or go to such places for anything healthy or good. Of course, he wasn't surprised that she didn't wish to tell him the details if she fully understood them herself.

"Listen, if this is about me punching that jedi...".
​

Caedyn opened his mouth as if by automatic reaction with the intention of answering, yet failed to find the words as he realized what she'd said. He almost didn't believe her, or perhaps it was more a case of not wanting to. Either way, there were no words at the given news that he could express without speaking out of his frustration, and clearly not having all of the facts.

She could have been under the influence; Hell, she might have been hallucinating. She needed to sober up.

"C'mon, we're getting you some food" he informed her. He had been a teenager once, and not under the Jedi's strict rules either. Naturally, the best foods for an intoxicated teenager meant the greasiest, unhealthiest and most convenient meal you could buy on the street.

Turning away, he didn't take her by the arm this time. He didn't want to have to drag her kicking and screaming, although at this point he'd more than likely resort to creating such a scene if it meant bringing her back into a healthier headspace. Whatever had gotten her in that space to begin with, well that was a discussion for when she could handle big words again.

Kyra Perl

 

[Kyra Perl]

This was totally about her punching that jedi.

Kyra huffed, dragging her feet as she unwillingly trailed behind. She wasn't gonna blow smoke up his ass, but she apparently wasn't here to own up for anything either. She was in a bad state.

"I'm not hungry," she protested, just for the sake of it. It did nothing to hide her red cheeks, but it did distract her from the shame. She slyly pulled out a packet of pills and tucked them into her bra line, taking the moment as she tottering behind to try and hide herself of all things damning.

She tucked her hair over her front, her usual padawan braid missing from her curls as she covered discolored marks that speckled the plane of her neck. She was a far cry different, indeed.

Scattered steps found their way back to his side, a noise of protest made.

"I'm sorry I missed it, can't we just reschedule? I promised to meet my dad-" she lied.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"You usually get drunk first before meeting your father, do you?" Caedyn responded rhetorically, and none too impressed. Now she was lying to him. Caedyn didn't know Coren Starchaser , as well as his father or others, might have, but he hated to think what the Jedi Master would say to Caedyn were he to see the state of his Daughter right now. "Was he going to be meeting us at the same place you were supposed to meet with me or were you planning on being in two places at once?" he added, sarcastically at that.

"The food will help to sober you up" he informed his Padawan, beginning to walk away from the club; "Don't make me drag you there too. You know I will" he reminded her. Caedyn didn't enjoy playing the role of dictator, yet he was doing so for her benefit and because he cared. Of course, he couldn't know that Kyra was hopped up on spice and force knows what else.

"I was hoping we'd have some time to catch up, given it's been a while..." Caedyn slowed, turning back to glance over his shoulder to check that she was indeed following him; "Apparently it's sorely needed" he concluded, sighing quietly under his breath, "I'd love to know what got you in to this place, given the last I heard you were doing really well".

Kyra Perl

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra's lies then bit her in the ass.

She grimaced, opting to bite her tongue and look away then dig any deeper of a hole.

What was there to say? She could barely understand it herself. One moment she felt like she had it under control-- just a break-- practicing with family-- a little time to find her footing as Nida...

and then... just once or twice... a little bit to ease off the edge...

She couldn't account for the shift, spare the fact that everything hurt and the spices helped. She was so ashamed to think of where she was now, but she lacked all power to stop it-- to care-- it was like she was drowning. Every time she tried to come up for air--

Her hand shook, pressing unconsciously against the spice she had hidden. Dread dragged in her gut as she followed him through the streets, silent now, her feet dragging.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

Kyra's silence spoke volumes, although not answering the questions that Caedyn had asked, her lack of a fight gave him the sense that she was out of excuses. At least for the time being. He himself did not look to push the issue. Not for the time being at least, the pair of them walking the streets of Coruscant until Caedyn was able to find a fast-food stall that looked close to the taste in the food he remembered her having back on Kashyyyk. Albeit not quite as healthy.

The stall was large enough to be considered an open diner, stools lining the counter while the chef was busy at work in the kitchen beyond, a droid there to take their orders. "Can I get a burger thanks" Caedyn ordered for himself, "Beef" he reiterated upon noticing the vegetarian options and shaking his head to himself; "Paying for the Girl too" he informed the droid, gesturing to Kyra Perl and throwing her a look that discouraged any argument, "Whatever she wants and a side of fries" he told the droid, wanting to be certain that Kyra got enough in her stomach to accelerate her sobriety.

Seating himself at the counter, clearly intending on leaving in no hurry, Caedyn gestured to the seat beside him in the case that his Padawan got any funny idea's. They hadn't been reunited for long, yet he was quickly getting the sense that she was needing some form of structure back in her life, discipline and routine that had worked so well for her in the beginning and seen to her progression as a student of the Jedi. He firmly believed she could get back there, although it might not be so easy given the spice he was yet to learn of, however, if she still wished to become a Jedi Knight one day, then he would bear the weight of whatever tantrum or phase she was to go through, to get her there.

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra flopped deadweight into the chair, painting a fair similar picture to the girl he had dragged to the achieves to teach manners to those first days of their partnership on Silver Rest.

"Milkshake," she murmured, not lying about not being hungry. She didn't know what to do with herself once the droid left. It felt too childish to slump back into the table like she woulda done long ago. Some part of her was determined to not make a fool of herself in front of her master. Even if he did find her drunk on a dance floor after ditching their meeting.

"How did you find me," came the dour question. She had thought cutting herself off from the force meant she also wasn't reachable through it in turn, but here he was. Sitting before her as if her location was the most obvious thing in the world. Her lips pursed, the girl perpetually feeling as if she was missing something.

Dignity, perhaps? Bad joke.

Caedyn Arenais

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

Truth be told, Caedyn hadn't realized or considered the fact that Kyra Perl might have been concealing her presence. It wasn't something he'd thought about given they'd planned to meet at a pre-arranged location. When he'd wandered off to look for her, it'd just been a matter of chance that he'd picked up on her presence, but as to why that might come as a surprise to her, he couldn't have known.

"I managed to sense your presence in the Force as I was nearing the Club..." He answered, glancing to her a little intrigued, sounding as though it shouldn't have been something he needed to explain...-After all, they'd done as much many times during their lives within the Silver Rest. Kyra doesn't show up for a class, track her down via the force, it was practically a learned habit nowadays.

As Kyra didn't appear in too much of a rush, Caedyn leaned across to pinch one of her fries with a half-smirk, curious to see if it'd garner a reaction. Given she wasn't apparently hungry, he didn't think it would, although usually, she was always happy to take the opportunity to mouth off at him, even if only in play.

"It's not really so bad so see your old Master now, is it?" he asked. Did he really want to hear her answer? He had hope that she might've missed him to some degree. He'd certainly missed their time together, day in and day out in service to the Order and the greater Galaxy around them.

 

[Kyra Perl]

His words made her wince, reflecting back onto her the very crude nature of her behavior.

"No, of course not," came the immediate response. She sat up a little, unresponsive to the fry stealing. She didn't need her empathy to see the pain her behavior was causing him. The rejection was written across the corners of his face, tight-- like he was holding his breath. The sign that she was getting to him would have brought her great satisfaction once upon a time. Now it had her grimacing, guilt building in her gut.

Her mouth worked for an explanation. Or perhaps an apology? There were no words that could account for the spiral she had gone down, if she had had them, maybe she wouldn't have jumped down this path in the first place.

Her shoulders slowly deflated, her eyes leaving his. A wash of moisture touched the surface, before dissipating back out. She slumped back into the table, squishing a fry with her fingers.

"You wanted to talk then?"

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"I did..." Caedyn replied, his tone somewhat reluctant as his mind worked to consider the state of his Padawan and how things felt between them; "I had hoped that we could catch up, and maybe pick up where we left off before you left for your search of Nida. That doesn't appear to be the case right now though, does it?" he stated rhetorically.

She was clearly in no condition to be undertaking an assignment or to be training like they might have been at this hour on a normal given day. Rest and recuperation were what she would need if she were to recover from whatever sort of bender or binge she had subjected herself too, he only able to guess, doing no justice for his concern for her.

"Things look like they've gone in the opposite direction?" this time his question was genuine, his words suggesting that she was heading away from the path she had previously been so determined to walk in life, that of the Jedi way. Given how much things seemed to have changed for her, it was only natural that he'd feel the need to ask whether this was by her design or not. Whether she still wanted to be a Jedi.

When they first started off, they had become Master and Apprentice. It was his responsibility to train her and to see her complete that training, to eventually become a Jedi Knight one day, providing that was what she wanted. Being a Master however wasn't so black and white as it sounded, his responsibilities also involved caring for and watching over her years, maintaining a positive role model from which she could learn from and to look out for her best interests, sometimes when she didn't know what those were herself.

It wasn't just a teaching role, but a guiding mentorship that at many times during their experiences, Caedyn had felt more like a parent than anything. He didn't have children of course, though their apprenticeship had given him a clue as to what that might have felt like and so it was again, natural that he would be concerned about her.

"We've been together for quite some time now...-So I've sort of learned to read the signs when you're unhappy in life. I can't say I've ever interrupted or seen you go through something like this before, but obviously, I can make a few guesses as to why" he forced a smile, a wary one as he studied her. He wasn't trying to lecture or to talk down to her, but his voice was soft and laced with concern, hoping to gain an insight as to what was going on with his Padawan.

"Do you wanna tell me what's going on?" he finally asked, leaving it in her hands as to whether she wanted them to plunge into the deep end together, or rather she swims alone and potentially drowns with the weight she seemed to be carrying.

Kyra Perl

 

[Kyra Perl]

Kyra grimaced, burrying her head into her arms until the world around her melted away. It was easy to say this was all just because he was so good at reading her, but in truth it wasn't so hard for anyone to see what was going on. Kyra hitched a breath, hiccuping into the table as she hesitated. The world still spun, but it was the threat of being taken back that had her tense and coiled in her seat, afraid of speaking and risking discovery.

"Its the empathy," she finally grumbled, a straw hand peeking out from her arms and searching the table for a singular fry.

"It's gotten very--" Her head popped up, dilated eyes squinting for the plate. Her fingers found what it was looking for-- the morsel nibbled on as she didn't look up.

"Loud. I just thought spending some time focusing on me would help," she bullshitted.

 

[Caedyn Arenais]

"I could have shown you a much healthier way of having fun without the hangover or the comedown that will hit you the following morning" Caedyn pointed out, glancing sideways at her somewhat suspiciously. He couldn't be certain whether she was being honest with him yet, but the fact that she was willing to talk at all was a good sign, as opposed to simply shutting him out and refusing to give him the time of day at all.

"There's a World I would like you to visit with me one day actually," Caedyn said, following the notion of getting his Padawan out and enjoying herself; "Mnemosyne is something of the recent development in my life, but to put a long story short, I've become responsible for it and the place is beautiful. Peaceful and relatively unknown compared to most other places, popular ones like Coruscant is for example" he turned back to his own dish, giving Kyra Perl a moment to consider while he ate some more of his burger.

"I'm guessing your Mom doesn't know what you're up to these days either?" He asked, letting his meal settle back atop his dish while glancing back her way; "The last discussion we had, I was concerned she might break something", or break him. That was concerning the battle over Yurb, which in Yula's defense she had every right to be concerned for her children.

"Or your friends? Acaadi even?".