Slick with it
So. This is it. This is real. She's finally here. Kell takes a deep breath and releases it slowly, casting her gaze once again around her room at the Tython temple, appearing untouched by any hand before hers. It's sterile, in the way that any good housekeeping would keep a room that saw turnover - inviting, comfortable, yes, but empty all the same. How many padawans came before her here? How many felt nervous under the weight of expectations, some they really only placed upon themselves?
How many of them were in their karking twenties?
She falls backwards, eyes closed and arms spread, onto one of the more comfortable beds she's laid on these past few years. It was... intimidating? Yes, that and a little embarrassing, she thinks. They're so competent in such a broader range of things. Jerem tought her so little in those years, even if what he did kept them safe; she'd never even held a saber - not counting trying to steal his the first time they met - before, never mind learned to fight with one. 'If you or I are ever forced to draw a blade, it is already too late'. She believed it. If he was going to run from the Sith, she sure didn't have a shot. It was always safer to disappear in the crowd, to sense them coming first, and leave.
Again. Always running.
A lifelong game of cats and mice. In a way, she was glad to have been left behind - it's an exhausting life to live, and if the other jedi were anything to measure by, it had certainly taken its toll on Jerem. They were so much less intense, less... focused isn't the right word, their focus is just different, but it's not frantic, not constantly needing to outmaneuver something as smart as you are. They were certainly more peaceful. It's hard to slow down when you only ever live in the fast lane.
Kell opens her eyes to the soft glow of the ceiling light near-imperceptibly humming at her in return, like a little hello. She stares vacantly at it for a full minute before dragging herself back into a seated position, rubbing at her face with the palms of her hands. You can slow down, now. It'll be okay, right? Being behind doesn't mean you'll be kicked out, it just means you have to catch up, and you always learned quick. You've always had to.
With another breath, another sigh, Kell rubs a thumb across the crystal - a lightsaber crystal, she now knows - left for her, tucked away like a little treasure in her pocket. Maybe it's time, now. Build a lightsaber. Little kids do that before their masters accept them, everybody else has one, you still have enough chop credits to nab stuff they won't pay for. It's something, right? They gotta have books on doing this, maybe some spare parts, some paint? Decking it out like a Sleemo album cover probably isn't in the cards, but none that she caught a glimpse of looked standardized. Yeah, you can do this - people do it all the time! You'll be a real jedi in no time flat!
It's going to be a long, long day.
How many of them were in their karking twenties?
She falls backwards, eyes closed and arms spread, onto one of the more comfortable beds she's laid on these past few years. It was... intimidating? Yes, that and a little embarrassing, she thinks. They're so competent in such a broader range of things. Jerem tought her so little in those years, even if what he did kept them safe; she'd never even held a saber - not counting trying to steal his the first time they met - before, never mind learned to fight with one. 'If you or I are ever forced to draw a blade, it is already too late'. She believed it. If he was going to run from the Sith, she sure didn't have a shot. It was always safer to disappear in the crowd, to sense them coming first, and leave.
Again. Always running.
A lifelong game of cats and mice. In a way, she was glad to have been left behind - it's an exhausting life to live, and if the other jedi were anything to measure by, it had certainly taken its toll on Jerem. They were so much less intense, less... focused isn't the right word, their focus is just different, but it's not frantic, not constantly needing to outmaneuver something as smart as you are. They were certainly more peaceful. It's hard to slow down when you only ever live in the fast lane.
Kell opens her eyes to the soft glow of the ceiling light near-imperceptibly humming at her in return, like a little hello. She stares vacantly at it for a full minute before dragging herself back into a seated position, rubbing at her face with the palms of her hands. You can slow down, now. It'll be okay, right? Being behind doesn't mean you'll be kicked out, it just means you have to catch up, and you always learned quick. You've always had to.
With another breath, another sigh, Kell rubs a thumb across the crystal - a lightsaber crystal, she now knows - left for her, tucked away like a little treasure in her pocket. Maybe it's time, now. Build a lightsaber. Little kids do that before their masters accept them, everybody else has one, you still have enough chop credits to nab stuff they won't pay for. It's something, right? They gotta have books on doing this, maybe some spare parts, some paint? Decking it out like a Sleemo album cover probably isn't in the cards, but none that she caught a glimpse of looked standardized. Yeah, you can do this - people do it all the time! You'll be a real jedi in no time flat!
It's going to be a long, long day.