Private Healers Way

[Aiden Porte]

Manaan

Among the weary and wounded stood a Jedi Knight. His robes were torn at the hems, his belt fastened loosely around a body made lean by long campaigns. The hilt of his weapon at his hip was more reassurance to the people around him than it was a weapon for himself. His hand rested on the shoulder of a child, guiding her gently down the ramp as the hatch lowered.


The air was thick with salt and the scent of medicine, kolto, freshly drawn from the ocean depths. Selkath healers waited, flanked by Alliance medics, their voices calm and deliberate. Stretchers slid past, carrying soldiers and civilians alike. The Jedi walked with them, neither above nor apart, his steps slow so that the refugees could match him.


He breathed in deeply, reaching out through the Force. Here, beneath the waters, there was no battlefield, no thunder of war machines, only the steady pulse of life in the oceans below. It was as if the planet itself whispered healing into his spirit. As he reached out past what was in front of him him, he felt the presence of a friend, they once had a nice conversation at Theed square once upon a time when he was offering cookies to the people of Theed. To help improve his craft. He had taken to cooking and baking like his Jedi arts.


When the Selkath delegation approached, their leader inclined his head. "Knight of the Republic, you and those you bring are welcome. Kolto will mend their bodies. May Manaan mend their hearts."

The Jedi bowed in return. His voice, low but firm, carried hope to those who listened: "They have endured much. But here, they begin to heal. Together." This wasn't his story, he merely helped guide them here. It wasn't praise he sought, but his vow that he made to those closest to him. The one's that entrusted him with the elevation of Knighthood.

Lorn, Briana, Brandyn, Vizion, Kryic, Lossa.......Solenne


He moved past the refugees as he took in the air of Manaan and the oceans that stretched before him. His gaze falling upon the steel path ahead of him, he was sure she was here. He just needed to find her now. And so he walked forward, to look for Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

<There's only so much I can do.>

Reina communicated with the Selkath in front of her, that had been insisting on her to help out with the healing of the wounded. Reina had never been much of a Healer. She didn't even know the first thing about healing someone else. Most of what she knew was just to help her deal with her own pain. Yet the moment the Selkath had found out Reina was a Jedi, they had deemed her as someone who could help. It wasn't even like she was carrying her lightsaber on her person anymore. She just pouted to herself as she did her best to push the Selkath's insistences away.

"You have...music voice, yes? Use that."

The redhead stopped midstep. Her hands curling into tightly balled fists at the Selkath's suggestion. She knew he meant the best. To use her voice to calm the wounded and stop their panicking...but in Reina's eyes, they were suggesting that she might as well take their own will away. It just filled her with anger. Anger that she was trying to control. But it was hard to control that amongst the pain that she was feeling. She had to focus on her breathing...and that's when she spotted a familiar face off to the side.

"I am busy. I have Jedi work to do. Leave me alone."

She snarled at the Selkath, using her voice...well quite directly to get the alien to leave her alone, instead making her way over towards Aiden Porte . She was still quite peeved off, but she was going to do her best not to lash out at the fellow Jedi. Instead walking up to him, and quite simply using Basic Sign Language...

<What are you doing here?>

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden had been standing off to the side of the triage ward, quietly observing the flow of healers and refugees. The smell of Kolto was thick in the air, mingled with the sounds of healers chanting softly as they tended to the wounded. His own hands were folded neatly in front of him, lightsaber hanging untouched at his belt, though here it seemed more a symbol of burden than of strength.

He felt her approach before he saw her, Reina's presence in the Force was raw, turbulent. Pain, anger, restraint all bound together, wrapped around her like a tide that threatened to overwhelm. His eyes lifted to meet hers, calm but edged with a weariness of his own.

When her hands moved in the familiar shapes of Basic Sign Language, he read the words easily:

<What are you doing here?>

For a moment he did not answer. He let the silence breathe, giving space for the anger in her eyes to cool, if only slightly. Then his own hands lifted, signing back with steady precision.

<The wounded needed escort. The Order asked, and I answered.>

Aiden's gaze flickered briefly to the Selkath who had retreated, then back to her. He signed again, slower, more deliberate:

<I can feel the weight on you. You don't have to bear it alone.>

He shifted slightly, enough to angle his body between her and the insistent Selkath, a subtle gesture that spoke of solidarity. His voice finally broke the silence, quiet so only she would hear it over the sounds of groans and movement all around them.

"You don't have to be their healer, Reina. Just being here… sometimes that's enough. I can help...."

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

That was a surprise. Reina hadn't expected Aiden to be able to speak Sign himself. It shouldn't have been a surprise. Aiden was almost like a living embodiment of what she had always visualised a Jedi to be. Knowledgeable. Controlled. Whilst also being so calm. Everything that Reina didn't feel like she was in this moment, even as she was doing her best to control it, running a hand down her face before pinching the bridge of her nose. In. Out. It was getting more and more natural for Reina to rely on the gills on her neck for breathing, as opposed to using her nose and mouth.

<It's not enough. I've been changed. I need to help. I need to prove I'm not ruined.>

No-one had said it. But it was something that was in the back of Reina's mind. That she was corrupted in some way through the transformation. Of course, there was nothing inherently dark about being one. Mellomere had proven that to Reina, considering how bubbly the Ersansyr she had met on Naboo was. But she felt like there was something wrong. Something that had been put into the back of her mind to make her turn against the Light. There wasn't of course, but Reina didn't know that. She needed to help. But she didn't know how.

<I need to prove that I'm me.>

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden's eyes softened as he watched Reina's hands shape the words. He didn't interrupt her, didn't even move right away, but let the truth of her struggle settle between them. He could feel it in the Force, like the sharp edges of broken glass, glittering with pain and determination both.

When she finished, his hand rose slowly, palm open in the universal sign for pause, for stillness. Then he signed back, his movements calm and fluid, but carrying weight in each stroke of his fingers:

<You are not ruined. The Light does not abandon.>

He let his hands fall, voice emerging quiet but firm. "Reina, you don't have to prove who you are. You already are. Every breath you take, every step you make alongside these people, shows it. You think you've been changed? Perhaps. But change is not corruption."

His gaze searched hers, steady but not prying. He signed again, slower this time, so she would feel the intent behind every shape:

<You are not broken. You are becoming.>

He took a slight step closer, lowering his tone as another stretcher passed by with a groaning refugee. "If all you can give them today is your presence, then that is enough. Not because it heals their wounds, but because it reminds them they are not forgotten. You are not forgotten."

His hand shifted, brushing lightly over his chest, then outward toward her in another sign:

<The Force is with you. Always.>

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

"It abandoned me."

Reina said, directly. It wasn't something she could hold back. She didn't want to speak. The power behind her voice and words. Yet it had all come out the same. Because it had for Reina. In that moment before she had been captured, before Reina had cracked, she had given up. There had been no Light left for Reina. She had tried to take things into her own hands because of how dark everything had felt. And even then, she couldn't do it.

The redhead clenched her fists. Nails dug into flesh as she gritted her teeth, staring down at her feet, trying and ultimately failing to hold back the tears falling down her cheeks. The change might not have been corruptive for Reina, but it had broken her. Shattered her into dozens of pieces, and even if most of those pieces had been put back together...There were still some shards missing, potentially never to be found again.

"Was the Force with me when I was altered? When my entire being was changed into something I can't understand?"

She knew the answer herself. Deep down inside at least. The Force was. It's why she was found. Why Valery, Everest and Colette were able to save her. But...she was just angry. Frustrated. She wanted to be able to do something but she felt like there wasn't anything.

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden didn't recoil from her words. He let them strike him as they were meant to, sharp, raw, full of ache. His breath moved slow, deliberate, as if he were steadying the world around them while she shook apart in front of him.

He didn't answer immediately. Instead, he let the silence stretch, not as an emptiness but as a shelter, a place where her words could breathe and not be denied. His hands lifted then, slow and steady, shaping his reply in Sign before he spoke.

<The Force does not abandon. But sometimes, it feels distant. As if it is holding its breath with us.>

His voice followed, quiet but unwavering. "When you were altered… when everything was torn from you—you ask if the Force was with you." He shifted his stance slightly, lowering himself just enough so his eyes could catch hers, even through the shimmer of her tears. "It was. Not to prevent the pain. But to carry you through it. You may feel broken, Reina. Shattered. But even broken glass catches the light."

He let that rest, then added, softer still, "The missing pieces you feel… they do not mean you are less. They mean you are changing. Becoming something new. That is not abandonment. That is survival."

One of his hands lifted halfway, hesitating as though unsure if touch would be welcome. He placed it gently on her shoulder, his own force presence giving a wave of soothing presence and energy to her.

<You are still here. That is proof enough.>

Aiden's gaze lingered on her, steady but kind. "You are not alone."

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

Holding its breath. Ha. That was something Reina found herself barely having to do now. It was surreal to her, to be able to breathe underwater without need of the Force. Without need of anything aiding her survival. Yet at the same time, Reina felt as if she hadn't survived. As if she had died the day she was captured. That the person she was now, wasn't Reina.

There was a subtle flinch as Aiden put his hand on Reina's shoulder. She wasn't as adverse to being touched as she used to be, but that didn't mean it didn't make her nervous. Hesitant. But she tried her best to power through it, even as her fists continued to clench tighter and tighter. She was becoming something new. Changing. Yeah. Sure...

"I don't want to survive. I want to live. I want to be happy."

It was simple. Yes, Reina was alive. She was surviving. But that didn't truly mean she was living. No. Survival and Living were two different things. At least to her.

"I might not be alone...but I feel like I'm being left behind. Everyone else is getting stronger. Being more capable. Whilst I'm moving backwards. My best friend was knighted. My best friend who I nearly slapped in the face when I first met her. Because she was crying. Asking her dad for help. But now she's a Knight, and I'm the one here crying, asking for help. I've went backwards."

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden's hand stayed on her shoulder just for a moment not gripping, not restraining, but steady. Grounding. He didn't flinch at her flinch. He simply let the tremor of her nerves pass through him as if he'd been expecting it. His eyes softened further at her words, and his voice, when it came, carried no judgment, only weight. He withdrew his hand as it lowered back to his side.


"Reina… surviving isn't a lesser thing. Surviving is living, when everything else tries to take that from you. Happiness....." He paused, the faintest breath of a smile ghosting his lips, though it didn't quite reach his eyes. ".....happiness isn't a permanent state. It's something we grasp in fleeting moments. A laugh, a breath of peace, a sunrise you didn't expect to see. You say you want to live? Then live for those moments, however small. They will carry you forward."

His hand slid back, folding against himself once more, and he shifted to Sign, letting each motion be deliberate and unhurried:

<You are not moving backwards. You are healing. Healing is not weakness. It is proof of strength.>

He lowered his hands slowly, meeting her gaze head-on. "Your friend became a Knight. That is her path. Not yours. The measure of your worth isn't in how fast you rise, but in how you endure. You look at yourself and see someone left behind. I look at you, and I see someone still fighting when she believes the fight is already lost."


Aiden's expression deepened with something unspoken, something rooted in his own scars. "Reina… don't mistake your pain for failure. It's the proof that you still want to live. The Force hasn't left you behind. It is waiting, for the moment when you're ready to take the next step."

He inclined his head, voice softening, "And until then, you are not alone in this step."

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

How could they carry her forward when Reina couldn't recall the last time she was actually happy? To be fair, Reina was still moving every day. She didn't know why. She couldn't explain it. She just did. One step in front of the other. Always getting up out of bed. Yet she just stayed quiet, folding her arms along her front as Reina then listened to Aiden explain how she was healing. Well, healing really sucks if she was honest to herself. Reina was used to dealing with pain. She wasn't used to healing. Reina had never given herself a chance to heal. She'd always rush in to get hurt more and more.

Reina didn't have any words to say in this moment. She didn't believe what Aiden had to say about her progress. Reina was being left behind. Plain and simple. She was a joke amongst the other Jedi, in her eyes. She couldn't be calm. She couldn't protect anyone. Reina couldn't be some Guardian of Peace, if she couldn't protect herself.

And so as Aiden spoke about how Reina wasn't alone, she just turned her head to the side, looking down at the floor instead of bringing herself to look at him. She couldn't believe a single word he was saying. Mostly because it all made sense. He was trying to support her. Trying to keep Reina moving but she didn't believe any of what he said. She'd keep moving either way. Moving one step at a time. She'd get over it. Eventually. At least that's what she hoped.

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden didn't push her silence. He didn't try to force her eyes back to his or demand that she answer. He simply remained there, a steady presence at her side, as the ward hummed with Selkath chants and the steady drip of kolto. He could feel her doubt, the way her anger and self-loathing wrapped around his words like armor, deflecting them before they had a chance to take root. But he didn't recoil. He didn't fill the quiet with more assurances she wasn't ready to accept. Instead, he breathed. Slow. Even. Letting the rhythm of it stretch between them, a subtle invitation to match it if she chose.

When he finally moved, it was small, his hands signing with simple, uncluttered shapes:

<You don't have to believe me. Not yet.>

His fingers lowered, and his voice came after, quiet enough it would be lost a few steps away. "But whether you believe or not… I will still stand beside you."

He let the words sit, then turned his gaze toward the sea beyond the windows. The pale light of Manaan's waters glinted on his features as he added, almost as if to himself, "The Order doesn't need perfect guardians. It needs people who keep walking, one step at a time."

And then he fell into silence again, leaving the choice with her, whether to fill it, or to simply breathe in the weight of not having to answer.

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

She had been growing more used to silence as her time as a Jedi continued. Before, she had nearly always been surrounded by some kind of sound that caught her attention. The wind against the waves, or the waves crashing against her boat. When she was selling her catch, the sounds of the people bartering would always be echoing through her mind, but in this moment? It was silent. Even the chanting of the Selkath wasn't quite reaching her ears as she just stared ahead of herself, not quite looking at anything but more looking through it.

"It does need guardians. It needs people who can protect the Galaxy. I can't even protect myself. How can I save anyone? Even when I've done it in the past, it's been the "wrong" way."

It was why Reina was trying to control herself. To be less angry with the Galaxy. Though in exchange, it had caused her to be more angry with herself. It was a vicious cycle that she was trying to get out of. At the very least, as much as she wouldn't fully admit, it was nice to know there were people who were willing to be there for her. To support her through this stuff. She had always expected to be alone, but she was slowly being shown otherwise.

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden didn't argue her words. Not at first. He let them exist, let them bleed into the silence between them as if the two of them were sitting on the ocean floor, where only the steady pulse of the current could reach. His hand finally rose, not to her shoulder this time but to sign with measure and patience.

<You are right. The galaxy does need guardians. But guardians are not unbreakable.>

He lowered his hand, voice following, low and steady. "Reina, even the Masters who taught me… they carried scars. Doubts. Failures. None of them were untouched by pain. Being a guardian isn't about never falling. It's about standing again after you've fallen, however long it takes."

He studied her sidelong, careful not to intrude on the fragile stillness she'd found. "You say you cannot protect yourself. And yet, you're still here. Breathing. Walking. Choosing to face this day. That is protecting yourself, even when you don't see it." His gaze softened further, a rare glimpse past his usual composure. "The 'wrong way' may still save a life. The question is not if you stumble, it's whether you learn."

He folded his arms lightly in front of him, matching her posture without mirroring it mockingly, as if to share in the weight. Then he signed one last thought.

<You are not alone in this cycle. We will face it with you.>

He didn't press further. He let the truth of it rest, like the still waters around them, quiet, waiting, unhurried.
Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

Well. That was one thing Reina could do. Nearly always did. She always stood back up after getting knocked down. It was only recently that she's stumbled. Her stubbornness and determination was starting to falter because she was starting to lack her own faith. She was starting to believe she was weak and couldn't just bash her head against something. Sure, bashing her head against something wasn't smart...but it was what Reina was used to.

But it wasn't as if she was choosing to face the day. She had no choice. There was no way that Reina would just stay in bed all day. Just let herself decay from a lack of use. Sure, some might say that was a choice but it wasn't. Not to her. It was what she had to do. The same way as people could technically choose to stop breathing, but their body wouldn't let them. In the same way, Reina's body wouldn't just her lay down. It was evidence, a sign that at the heart of things, even after her body had changed, Reina was still Reina. She wouldn't give up, as much as she might have wanted to.

"I want her dead."

It was a simple thing to break the silence. Perhaps a shocking statement. But it was something Reina needed to get off her chest. She needed to get it out, instead of letting it fester inside of herself.

"The one who did this to me. I want her gone. I know it's not right. But I want it. I won't do it myself. But I'll cheer if it happens."

If Aiden was going to let the truth of things rest, then so was Reina. She'd speak the truth. How she felt about it. A Jedi might not meant to relish in the death or pain of others...but that was one amount of pain that Reina could truly relish. And it made her feel filthy.

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden did not recoil, though her words carried all the weight of a blaster shot fired point-blank. He absorbed them in silence, like stone against a crashing tide. His gaze remained steady on her, not judging, not flinching, just present.

When he finally spoke, his voice was low, measured, but not cold. "You've named it. That hunger. That anger. That… relief you think you might feel if she were gone." His eyes softened, though his tone carried a steady gravity. "That honesty takes courage, Reina. More than most Jedi are willing to show, even to themselves."


He let the quiet linger before signing again, each movement deliberate, calm:

<Feeling it does not make you filthy. It makes you human.>

His hands fell. "What matters is what you do with it. The desire for vengeance is real, I have felt it too. Against those who took Esme, against those who took my father. Against those who burned what I swore to protect." His breath drew in slowly, then released. "But when I clung to it, it chained me tighter than any enemy could. That is the trick of it. To promise freedom while it binds you."

Aiden glanced toward the rows of wounded Selkath and refugees, their suffering like a tide swelling around them. "You say you won't raise your hand against her yourself. That choice matters. The rest, the anger, the longing, you can face it. You already are. One step, one breath, one truth at a time."

He shifted slightly, not so much to close the distance but to align himself at her side, so they looked forward together.

"You are not filthy, Reina. You are wounded. Wounds can heal."

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

"Is it courage? It feels more like stupidity. Foolishness. And I'm not exactly human anymore."

Sure, it might have just been a regular saying, but it was something that Reina resented with a passion. She wasn't human. She wasn't normal. It made her just feel wrong but Reina was trying her hardest not to deal with that. She'd be fine. At least that was what Reina was trying to deal with.

"I can say that I won't raise a blade to her, but that's all it is. Me saying. I can't prove it. For all I know, the next time I see her, I'll try to rip her head off."

And fail at it. but Reina didn't need to think about that. Focusing on how she couldn't do something wasn't the best idea on cheering herself up. She just needed to have more faith in herself. Whilst at the same time, that faith had to be in something that wasn't too awful.

"I just want her gone. Every last trace of her scrubbed from the Galaxy."

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden's eyes flickered at her words, but not in disapproval. If anything, it was a quiet recognition, the way someone might react to a scar they'd seen in a mirror before. He shifted his stance slightly, folding his arms across his chest, not to wall himself off, but to steady the weight of what she'd just admitted.

"You're right. Words alone can't prove what you'll do when that moment comes." His voice was level, but not dismissive. "I've told myself the same before. Sworn to be calm, only to find anger rushing back the instant I saw the one I blamed. That's not foolishness, Reina. That's honesty. And it's the first step toward knowing your limits before they break you."

His hands moved again, each sign precise, deliberate:

<Human. Jedi. Altered. None of that matters. You are you.>

He held her gaze, steady and unflinching. "You want her gone? That's a truth I won't argue. But hear me, scrubbing someone from the galaxy doesn't erase the mark they left. It only deepens the scar. If she falls, whether by justice or by fate, the pain won't vanish. The only thing that will decide whether you heal… is you."

Aiden exhaled slowly, his eyes narrowing just a fraction, not in judgment but in intensity. "You are not weak because you want her gone. Weakness would be letting that want own you. The fact that you're here, speaking it, naming it. means it doesn't."

He let the silence breathe then, offering her the space to wrestle with his words, not demanding an answer. Answers wouldn't come today, it was going to take time, and unfortunately something she didn't want to hear and that was patience.

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

"My limits can't break what has already been broken."

It was matter of fact. The way Reina said it. She was broken. It wasn't something she tried to run away from. It wasn't something she tried to hide. It was something that Reina had accepted at the very least. One of the steps to healing after all was to accept what you needed to recover from. And so that's what Reina was trying to do. Heal. Recover. As much as it was difficult for her. Perhaps being here with the sick and injured was not the best idea Reina had mustered.

"But I don't care about the pain she's left me. It can hurt as much as possible. I don't want her to hurt anyone else. She's...an abomination. A vile being that shouldn't breathe...but I'm afraid. Of my hatred. That it'll influence me. If I come across her again. That I'll just see red..."

Her hands started to curl up into tightly balled fists once more. Anger was something that she had gotten used to, but this was different. Hatred. Resentment. Things she knew were connected to the Dark Side. Emotions that Reina didn't want to work with. She was fine with working on her anger. Her stubborness. But when it came to dark, too serious...Reina didn't want to play into those emotions.

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >

 

[Aiden Porte]

Aiden's gaze stayed on her, steady as the sea outside the transparisteel walls. Her words were sharp, but beneath them he heard the tremor, the fear of the line that seemed to exist, and how close she felt to crossing it.

He raised his hands, signing with slow, deliberate care so she wouldn't mistake the shapes:

<Broken glass still cuts. Broken stone still holds. Broken does not mean useless.>

His arms folded back against his chest, but his presence leaned toward herk solid, grounding. "You want her gone because you don't want anyone else to suffer as you did. That intent, at its heart, is compassion twisted by pain. You must learn to untwist it. That is the work. That is the healing."

He glanced toward her fists, tight and trembling, then back to her eyes. "I've seen red before. It blinds. It burns. And it leaves nothing behind but ash. If that moment comes for you, remember this: you don't have to face it alone. Not now. Not then. That's why we stand together."

He signed one word, clear and steady:

<Always.>

Reina Daival

 

[Reina Daival]

Tag: Aiden Porte

How could she untwist that pain? She just wanted to crush. Not the innocent of course, but those who would bring pain to them. It had been how Reina had always thought, but it had grown in recent days. It was something she knew she shouldn't feel however. She needed to control herself from trying to destroy people. She had to learn how to be peaceful, which is honestly more work than she might have expected.

"I've never wanted to be a problem for other people. I've never wanted to take time out of other people's day since I need their help...but I know I need it. It's just hard to accept."

She sighed at herself with that, leaning against the wall as she turned her view over towards the water. Today wasn't what she had been expecting. There had been a lot of nonsense said that Reina would have yelled out in the past...but at this point? Reina was okay with it. Aiden had been trying to help her. So she was...pleased.

"Thank you Aiden. I'll...be better. Eventually I think."

Spoiler: OOC Notes

: Means written/typed communication : < Means Sign Language communication >