Fire Red & Onyx Black {Gilamar}

[Kadala Kotyc]

How long has it been since I returned to civilized space?... At least a year, right? Yet... I still haven't spoken to Gilamar. To father, I mean. Sure, we've seen each other. But he didn't recognize me under my armor... Makes sense I guess. Back when he... left mum and me things were a lot different. I was younger. Small, frail, might even have been considered an embarrassment for a Mandalorian child. By the Gods that was so long ago... Things have changed. And they will continue to do so. Speaking to Gil is top priority. He needs to know I am alive. I need to know why he abandoned me. Mistakes of the past will come forward for their trial. The truth will be revealed. Let's just hope I've grown up enough to handle it. Crying is not something one does in front of someone they're trying really hard to impress. Neither is having a temper tantrum. Though honestly I'd be more concerned about myself trying to sacrifice him to Hachinian. Which actually wouldn't be that bad if he wasn't my pa. He's proved himself as a warrior. Destroying him in the name of-... Right, not an option. No blood for the blood God today (as in no blood for the Chaos Goddess). Nor any skulls for the skull throne (or it's companion, the Iron Throne). Well I've wasted enough of my own time. Now I need to actually do something. Let's hope Gil isn't adverse to meeting someone of such a low rank. Not sure how 'Dad' works.

With one last glance into the dirty mirror, I pulled on my helm, turned, and left. My 'home' was the ruins of an old settlement. Pre-Gulag-Virus. Maybe it's not very safe, but I'm not ready to move in with the other members of my Clan. They know I'm here. They know I fight with them. Don't think any of them know my real name. Just this nickname I've been carrying around for years. Kadala... No, I need to forget him, the real Kad. He's been dead for years. I just have to make his memory proud. Shaking my head I started walking. There was a clearing not far from here where I kept my ship. The damn thing is pretty beat up. Somehow it still flies. Once I slip into the uncomfortable captain's chair I start turning systems on. First is communications. Calling in my meeting request will have to be done before I get there. And getting there requires knowing where 'there' is. Who knows where Gil is at the moment. "This is Kadala Skirata. I require an audience with the Mand'alor. Tell him that the ghost of Tome'Tayl misses him. He'll understand." Saying my old name sends a shiver down my spine. No one has used it in twelve years. Not since I lost the last person I loved.

[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

"Um..Mand'alor, you expecting anyone..uh...special?"

Gil's eyes rose from the stack of MandalMotors paperwork. The voice over the com sounded confused. While it was true that most anyone could talk to Gilamar, this was usually a time he reserved for MandalMotors, the only other time that didn't involve drinking.

He to a swig from his flask.

Alright, not binge drinking, where he could forget about the world and just be absorbed in his work. His brow rose in confusion. Pressing his finger to the com on his desk he studerd for a moment, "Um...no?" A pause, and then a click. "Um sir, she says 'the ghost of Tome'Tayl misses you. She said you'll understand." The old man's eye twitched. The grip on his writting utensil tightened, it snapped. Anger filled his eyes as sorrow crept into his heart. "Send her up." he growled into the man's helmet com. The Mandalorian nodded [member="Kadala Skirata"] through.

Just great. He wasn't wearing his armor, but what he did have...Thinking quickly he reached into his desk, pulling out a beskar plated box. With a grunt he lifted it onto his desk and clicked the archaic lock open with the key that sat on the side of his desk. Click. Within he found a Chargin Rhyno and a pair of crushgaunts. They would be heavy, feel out of place without the rest of his armor on, but it was enough. Inhaling through his nose he slipped them on and stuffed the revolver into his pants. "Whoever this little Chit thinks she is..." He waited on the left side of the door. "She'll regret coming here today..."

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

Hmm. I was expecting the scheduling process to be a tad more difficult. Eh, if it means I won't have to wait as long, I don't care. My rickety old ship managed the trip (still semi-surprisingly) in a short period of time. Really wasn't that large of a distance to travel, apparently. Yet it felt like awhile. Both my hands were a little shaky, sweaty beneath the body-suit and armor. Even my breath seemed a little more ragged than usual. Guess this is what happens when you go to see your dad again after twelve-ish years apart. The death trap that is my shuttle hit the ground with a little 'thud'. Systems shut off, leaving me alone with my thoughts. "Time to go, Kad..." With that I forced myself up out of my seat. Doors automatically opened to let me exit the vessel. Points for technology for that one. Back on PRKCG (Planet-of-the-Really-Karking-Creepy-Guys) there wasn't much tech other than weapons and electrified fences. Just things to keep us contained along with fighting. Food, of course, was occasionally dropped in. Nothing fancy. Well, there were a few sporks. Wondrous little things for both stabbing and scooping. Very useful.

But I'm getting off track again. Walking to the old man's office, I mentally prepared myself. How would this go? How should I approach him? Will I be able to keep myself from yelling?... As long as there aren't any tears... it should be fine. I guess. About a minute passed before I stood in front of Gil's door. My heart is pounding inside my chest. Gotta stay focused. Taking off my helm I let the long, messy locks of hair fall around my shoulders. A shaking hand pushed red bangs away from my eyes. One green, one brown. That would be how dad would recognize me. As far as I knew no one else in the family had it. Just me. Mum used to tell me how special it made me. Kadala, the original one, said that it was what made him knew he could trust me. Because he was pretty different from the rest of his family too. That's not important right now... I raised my hand, letting the door slide open, and stepped inside. "Gil?... er, pa?..." Where was-... oh. Crushgaunts. Lovely.
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

With a thud, Gilamar pressed all his weight on the perceived intruder, pinning her to the duracrete wall inside the office. One hand gripped her chest plate, the other her wrist. A snarl filled his maw, and anger flared in his eyes. Why were they coming back? It had to be them, they were the only ones who knew. With a growl behind his words he spoke, "Why the hell are you here? How many are with you?" His grip tightened around the chest plate, bending the armor slightly. He wouldn't exert too much pressure. If he wasn't careful he could snap her wrist clean off.

But right now, patientce wasn't at the forefront of his mind. "TELL ME!" he spat the words, droplets of saliva splattering on her visor, alcohol was strong on his breath. He hadn't stopped drinking. Not since that day. He would never. If it killed him so be it.

He probably deserved it.
[member="Kadala Skirata"]

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

Well then. Sure, I had expected something like this to happen. But I had been sure that I was going to be the aggressor. Instead I was pinned against a wall while an old man breathed alcohol-filled air in my face. Ugh. Things were already going downhill. "Why the hell are you here? How many are with you?" Paranoid much? Or... did this have to do with what happened that day? God Kadala... don't cry... Memories were already starting to come back. I remember watching her die. I remember running, trying to get as far away as possible. Then they found me. Healed my wounds, only to throw me into a far worse fate. "TELL ME!" That was when I snapped. With all that anger bent up over the years I yelled. Practically spat in his face as I screamed. "You nerf herder! IT'S ME, TOME! God damn it dad, it's me!" I wanted to punch him. But all I could do is scowl as the first tear fell. "After all these years, I'm back. So tell me why you left us. TELL ME WHY YOU LEFT HER TO DIE!" Struggling seemed pointless. Yet I did it anyway. Part of me regretted coming... But I had to see this through.
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

All at once his senses faltered, he froze, faced with another ghost. It had to be, they were dead, they were both dead. His eyes became wet, but he would not shed a single tear. He wouldn't let this sick bastard see him like this. Releasing his hold on the girl he took a few steps back. She was messing with his head, he had to have been. Drawing the revolver out quickly he pulled back the hammer. "Who the Hell are you...Take it off. Take the damn helmet off!" Is that what he really wanted? What if it was her? It would have been easier to have killed her and never known.

What are you thinking you sick old fool?

Was he that afraid of facing his demons? That he would kill his own daughter? Of course not, but the fact that the thought slipped through the cracks of his mind disturbed him. He glanced over his shoulder, making sure not to give the potential shooter a chance to take his or her shot. If anything he would get hit in the leg. He could deal with that.
[member="Kadala Skirata"]

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

"Who the hell are you?... Take if off. Take the damn helmet off!" Gil snapped. Pa seemed crazy. Drunken, disturbed, and far older than he really is. The look in his eyes is something even I find painful to see. So this was what guilt did to a person... Hm. Guess I'll have to make sure to never make the same mistakes he did. Raising a hand slowly I took the helmet off before dropping it. A dull thud marked it's landing on the floor. "Look at me. Stop this idiotic madness and just look at me. One green, one brown. Just like always." I pointed at my eyes. At the insanity that filled them. The sorrow, the sadness, the call of death. And with a blink they shifted, most of the emotions in them pulled back. He wouldn't see all of what he caused. Not yet at least. For now he'd just have to realize that I'm alive. That he didn't leave two family members to die. Only one. Which reminds me... I really need to slap him for that. Though I'll wait until he's not waving a gun in the air.
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

Jaw dropping. That's how he would describe the moment the would be assailant dropped her helm to the floor. Upon realizing who stood before him his guard lowered, his weapon arm dropped, and the revolver fell from his hand, clanking on the floor. He felt the air leave his lungs as if he had just been struck by a Wookie right int the gut. Tears welled up in his eyes, but did not fall. His lips felt dry, and he felt as if there was no possible way he could ever form a word that would describe how he felt.

"Tome'ika..."

That was all he could muster. He took a tentative step forward, looked at the hand that had held a gun up to his only daughter. It was shaking. Looking back up to his little girl, no the woman before him he closed the distance and embraced her, his hand right hand cardling her head under his chin. He inhaled deeply trying not to cry, but he couldn't help it. He shuddered once and quietly began to cry. What else could he do? He had thought she was dead for all these years.

He thought he had killed them.
[member="Kadala Skirata"]

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

As the gun fell... I knew he had realized the truth. Which meant I could finally get answers. Well, after the catching up that is usually required in a meeting like this. "Tome'ika..." Gil was hugging me? This feels... odd. Rather unexpected. Then again we have two different perspectives on things. While I was abandoned, put through a living hell and forced to fight for me life, he must have mourned the loss of his daughter. Despair filled him while anger filled me. Or perhaps he became enraged at himself? Could explain all the drinking it seems like he's done. "People call me Kadala now..." I didn't know what to say. All of the pain seemed to wash away for a moment. My family... my little, broken family was back together. For the moment it was enough. The tears came again, running down my cheeks as my body shook softly with sobs. "It's good to see you again dad..."
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

With a deep, shaky breath Gilamar released his child, placing his hands firmly on her shoulders. With a stupid grin his old eyes saw life that he hadn't seen in years, he felt lighter on his feet as if a heavy sack had been lifted from his shoulders. His daughter was alive now. Or rather she had been alive this entire time. Why hadn't she come to him sooner? He had so many questions, but he knew that she would have questions of her own. "Kadala...eh...?" he said slowly, the words foreign on his lips. Shaking his head to clear the thoughts filling up his skull he motioned to the pair of seats in front of his desk. "Please...I'm sure you have a lot of...questions for me." he muttered, taking a seat next to the other.
[member="Kadala Skirata"]

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

Somehow I got the tears to stop flowing. Of course, my eyes would still appear a tiny bit red, and my cheeks would be a little wet. But that didn't really matter. Despite how our last meeting went... I was happy to see my dad again. "Kadale... eh...? Please... I'm sure you have a lot of... questions for me." That I did. So I quietly sat next to him, wondering where to start. "Well... First, how much have you been drinking? Because if you're alcoholic to an unsavory degree mister, we're gonna start you on an intervention plan this instant." My tone was kind, but stern. I wanted him to know things were okay. At the same time he needed to know I was serious. Alcohol in high levels is bad for your liver. Dad's tough, if he's gonna die, it has to be either in an epic last fight, or of old, manly aging. "Also, have you, er, met anyone special?... 'Cause I need to know if I suddenly have a younger sibling or anything like that." Also important. Even if I let my partial lack of social skills show for a moment.
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

He snorted at both remarks, his thumb running over the silver wedding band still sitting on his ring finger. Chewing the inside of his cheek he mused to himself. He had never thought this day would come, and what he actually expected was an angry soul, ready to rip his heart out, and to be honest Gil would have been content with that as his punishment. He had been punishing himself all these years...Looking down to his ring and then back up to his little girl he said, "No." as if answering both questions, while in actuality he only meant no to the second question. He had not met anyone special, save for that one night on Tatooine, but that had been a mistake.

Another regret.
[member="Kadala Skirata"]

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

One 'no'? I had to raise an eyebrow at that. Sure, I believed that he hadn't met anyone special. Nor remarried for some other purpose. But I had to wonder about his alcohol consumption. So I made a mental note to watch how much he drinks. "Well... That's good to hear. Because no one can replace mum. And no one ever will. Now for the serious, potentially hard-to-answer question that might result in a slap or two. What happened? The day you left mum and me?" Part of me was scared to hear his answer. Another part wondered if I'd be able to handle it. Worst come to worst... there would be a few blaster bolt marks on the walls, maybe a few bloodstains on the floor. Nothing that couldn't be fixed. Hopefully.
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

His eyes fell, the man unable to look his daughter in the eye. That day had left a blight on the old man's heart and it was a day he would never forget. But dwelling on it, replaying the day in his head wouldn't help his daughter understand, let her know what happened, why he abandoned her. And so he began at the begining, his dry mouth struggling to begin.

"i'm sure you remember the day..." a pause. "Your mother and I were tailing a Dark jedi and his band of pirate mercs, but they sprung an ambush on us when we found their base. The fighting was intense and both your mother and I took some bad hits." The memory flashed through his head. Taking a shaky breath he started to reach into his inner shirt pocket for the flask, but decided against it. Leaning forward, his head in his hands and his elbows on his thighs he continued his story. "Then the leader brought you out and the fighting stopped immediately. They told us to turn ourselves in to them to save you. We both knew they were screwing us over but we did it anyways. They took off our helmets and..." The blaster shot would echo through his mind over and over as she mouthed her final words. He choked. "I-I Reacted on instinct, stabbed the Dark Jedi through his knee with my bes'bev and the one holding you shot you. What happened next...I couldn't tell you. I saw red, only red and when it was over...I was the only one left in the room. Your mother stirred when I thought she was dead. When I told her you were shot and weren't moving...She couldn't look me in the eye, but I know she did not hate me...We both knew who was to blame for what we both thought was your death. Your mother was paralyzed and losing blood fast...I tried to take her with me but she told me-..."

He couldn't, no, he didn't want to go on. But he had to. "She told me to go. There were more men coming from behind us and she told me to go and pulled out a thermal detonator. I left and she fought to her last breath...Allowing me to escape."
He never wanted to look back at that day, but she deserved to know. "I thought you were dead..."
[member="Kadala Skirata"]

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

So the story began. I remembered the start of it. Being taken away, presented in front of my parents. They had gagged me, but I had done my best to tell mum and dad to get out. To save themselves. My life wasn't worth theirs. Of course they hadn't listened. Mother got shot, dead flipped out, then a blaster bolt slammed into the back of my neck. It should have killed me. But it didn't. Somehow. After that I blacked out for a bit. When my eyes opened I saw mum, dead. Dad was nowhere to be seen. Someone came to get me. Healed me up, pretended to be with local police. Turns out they lied. That was when they shipped me off to the arena. Honestly I try to forget what happened after that. "... Mum always was a stubborn one. I'm not surprised she had you leave. To her it must've looked like I was gone. She had to save you. Because she couldn't lose us both, pa. It was awhile after that that I regained consciousness. And I'll tell you, she sure took out a lot of guys with that detonator. Would've made you smile." That was partially a lie. Seeing the way her corpse had been was absolutely horrifying. Plus, she would've killed more if they hadn't shot her. But the grenade did mess some guys up real bad. There was more than one trail of blood leading off from the area. "Now I'm guessing you want to know how I survived all these years? And never came to you until now?"
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]

 

[Gilamar Skirata]

He shook his head. "Maybe...another time. Your father is tired after all..." he paused and gestured towards her and then the entire room, "This..." He looked weary, as if he would melt into his own chair, his old eyes hung low. "Tayl- I mean...Kadala. If you need a place to stay..." He was more saying that he truly wanted her to come home with him. He wanted to fill in the years that had been missed, be a real family again. But he somehow felt that she wanted to go her own way, be seperate from him. He had to accept that...She was a grown woman now. But it would still sting.
[member="Kadala Skirata"]

 

[Kadala Kotyc]

Another time. That would be fine. Dealing with that much emotion in one day wasn't a good idea anyway. But I knew he'd want to know eventually. Though I think it would just make him feel worse about what happened. So it'll wait. For a few weeks, a few months, or maybe a few years. "Tayl- I mean... Kadala. If you need a place to stay..." I didn't, not really. However... the idea of telling him so seemed... odd. Wrong even. Maybe it's because I know it would hurt him. "I've got my own place now, pa. 'Course, my ship needs some repairs, and you seem have some capable men around here... I could stay for a few days. If you want." Sounded like a good excuse. The 'ol lass needs some work anyway. Not like I was lying to make my old man feel better. Plus, if the Mandalorian Engineers are still as good as they were last time I met them, my ship will be better than it ever has been before.
[member="Gilamar Skirata"]