Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Finding your way (Aedan's solo training thread)

Aedan Miles sat in the cockpit of his custom painted Devastator-class Heavy Fighter his eyes closed as he meditated during the long journey he was on. He had felt the need to get away from the group he lead but only for a little he had left them in charge of themselves with the orders to not do anything to foolish. Now he was in hyperspace on his way to Metalorn his plans were to go to the sites of battles he had taken place in and meditate upon them. Find a way to come to peace with the lies he had taken or assisted in taking. Metalorn was the most recent one and as such it would be the first planet he stopped at. He hoped that no one would have an issue with his presence but he was sure as long as he remained peaceful the only ones that may have an issue would be the ones who named him a war criminal or trying to help them. For now though he was meditating on the lightstaff he had recently acquired and was attempting to fine tune so that he would have no issues with it while fighting. His eyes closed as he focused on the long silver colored hilt that rested in his lap. He had recently replaced the crystal that had been within it with the Durindfire crystals he had found. He far preferred the silver colored blade to any he had seen thus far it helped to ease the pain he felt whenever he had to take a life. Outwardly in front of everyone he had started to give the impression of not caring about it or it not being a big deal but on the inside he felt each death as if it was the death of those close to him. The only reason he was able to keep going was because he thought he was doing the right thing. In his mind he was doing what had to be done for his plan to work. He just hoped his plan didn’t cause the death of those who worked with him and followed him into battle. He finally opened his eyes as R3-E7 let out a tone announcing that they were nearing the end of their hyperspace journey. Aedan’s piercing violet gaze slowly opened as he reached down taking the control yoke into his hand he prepared to take manual control of the fighter. As he finally exited hyperspace he leaned forward his eye gleaming as he looked down at the planet. He heard his coms crackle and activated it “This is Aedan Miles I am on a reflection journey of sorts I have gained clearance as long as no hostilities take place.” He waited calmly until the com crackled again. “This is Metalorn space station Alpha you are cleared on approach.” With that he slowly entered the atmosphere he slowly approached the outskirts of the City he had foolishly helped the Republic attack.

He set his fighter down carefully and leaned back sighing as the memories came flooding back to him and his side gave a slight twinge from the remembrance of the spear of dark side energy that had hit him. He opened the cockpit and slowly climbed out of his fighter appearing older than his 21 years of age. He settled on the ground cross legged and took a slow deep breath as he did he slowly let go of the shields he had set up within his mind over time and let the memories from this battle flood back into his mind. Through them he remembered the men he had lost to the horde of prisoners driven insane by the Gunjack that they had been injected with. He remembered the decision he had made that had earned him the title War Criminal he had called in for more pilots and taken the fighters up and strafed the horde he had done it to save the Republic but they had named him a war criminal. He remembered setting down after that to help Cody Jorin who he had saved once before. Now they were on opposing sides most likely he had heard reports that Cody had held a CIS diplomat at gun point at a recent auction and then the whole thing went to hell. As he sat there and let the memories flood through him and away as he realized that he had only done what had been necessary again. The weight seemed to lift from his shoulders slowly and he seemed to relax if anyone were observing him. After another few minutes his eyes opened and he slowly stood up his violet eyes slightly duller but a hint of his old self once more returning. He turned and walked to his fighter pulling out a pouch of credits he went into the town to restock on supplies before he once more took off moving on to the next planet on his list. Dagobah the planet where he had gone to assist in removing the plight of the Harvesters from the galaxy back then he had still been a member of the Protectorate he slowly climbed into his fighter and shut the cockpit taking a deep breath he started to take off and bring himself about on the correct heading.

Aedan looked at the read out and then glanced up at the familiar repainted dome of his R3-E7 he then tapped on the cockpit and called out to the droid knowing that it would hear him through the coms system. “Hey R3 wake me up an hour before we leave hyperspace I am going to reserve systems by putting myself into a light hibernation like state almost.” R3 howled and whistled sharply the text scrolling up on a screen as he glanced at it and chucked OF COURSE I WON’T WAKE YOU UP BOSS JUST LET US CRASH INTO A PALNET OR SUN! Aedan chuckled and muttered “Maybe it’s time for a memory wipe you’re starting to be a bit smart.” He shook his head and then leaned back clearly kidding he enjoyed the personality R3 had gained because of the lack of a memory wipe. Aedan’s breathing slowed to that barely indicating his was alive as he leaned back against his pilot’s seat his fighter entering hyperspace quickly on the journey to Dagobah. Two days later and after waking up 2 more times for separate jumps Aedan was awakened by R3’s nonstop whistling. Sighing he reached down to pull one of the ration bars out and grudgingly take a bite out of it forcing himself to swallow as he pulled a water bottle out and took a quick drink. HE looked at the timer on the display and placed his hand on the control for the hyperspace and once it hit zero he quickly pulled back looking out the cockpit to see the planet Dagobah floating before him. He took a deep breath and then calmly put himself into a descent to the planet landing in a swamp this time he didn’t bother to leave the fighter just closed his eyes and let himself fall into the force.

Aedan Miles let himself fall once more into the memories from this planet. This time he had killed beings that should never have been and lost a lot of good soldiers while doing something he had no training with. If only he had been trained could he have saved them by doing it faster? Maybe if he hadn’t even suggested it maybe if they had tried something else his men would have been saved. Maybe if he had retrieved formal training in the use of the force he wouldn’t have endangered Mirshen or Veret as he tried to do something reckless. What was he supposed to do just let them dive in and swim down to it when there were things in there he could sense them again even now. He knew that there was no other option. But did that make it his fault that they had all died. What was he supposed to be in this galaxy. He finally let his eyes open slowly as he looked down at the chrono on the screen in front of him. He had been meditating there for 2 hours. He slowly sighed as he looked down the answer he had searched for was still just out of reach. He shook his head and slowly started his systems back up he still had 3 more places to stop and next on the list was the planet Elrood. He slowly took off and headed towards space his eyes still dim and distant but still more of the old Aedan returning to them. He sighed and typed up the coordinates for Elrood and prepared for the jump the hyperspace shaking his head once as he slowly started to throttle forward. Finally his fighter entered hyperspace on the short journey to Elrood. He leaned back and closed his eyes slowly as his ship traveled through hyperspace.

12 hours later he was woken up by R3’s insistent whistling and he snapped up right realizing that they were no longer in hyperspace. He had over slept and R3 had been forced to pull them out of hyperspace. Now they floated over the planet Elrood and they were being hailed by Elrood space control. Aedan reached out and calmly answered them. “This is Aedan Miles on a meditation journey to recent events that I was a member in. Requesting permission to land and merely meditate maybe do some shopping.” He leaned back and sighed as they cleared him to land and he slowly brought himself down on a course to the landing area setting his fighter down he began the shutdown sequence and then popped the cockpit vaulting from it he landed and walked towards the man approaching him reaching into his pocket he pulled forth a cred chit and handed it to him gesturing at the fighter. “Just leave it be I will check it when I get back.” He turned and walked through the town slowly his eyes half closed as he opened himself to the memories again. He stopped in front of one of the two space ports he had been tasked with defending. He recalled the men he had command of at that time. Almost as many as he commanded now and he remembered how this had been their first mission under his command. He had lost almost half of them in this one battle watching them fall to the scourge of undead as they attempted to form a wall out of their bodies. He recalled seeing some of his men who had died getting back up to fight against them those things that had once been his men he had cut down more than a few of them himself. He sighed and continued to walk stopping in at a shop on his way he looked around before buying a pair of vibro blades and requesting them be delivered to his ship in two hours. Aedan Miles looked around the town as flash backs of what had occurred here his soldiers falling and then slowly standing back up to fight against them. He finally came to the last place where he had fought where he had chased the insane woman Shinju. The building he had climbed up and confronted her. Here things had ended badly for him he had almost been knocked from the roof when another Sith appeared to help Shinju. He had decided it was time to leave and he had used a grapple and rope to repel down the building. He clenched his fist angrily as he remembered what he saw on the way down. Civilians running towards the space port the undead chasing them and killing those they caught. Sometimes they would stop and seem to eat them before moving on he had lost control here the first time and had gone on a rampage in front of the star port. By the time he came to he was covered head to foot in blood and guts from his opponents. He remembered when he turned to see his men staring at him in horror and he realized that he wasn’t meant to be a member of the protectorate. He came to too realize that he was getting closer to the answer he was seeking. He turned and strode calmly towards the star port his eyes gleaming brilliantly as he hid the fear he held within his soul.

As he reached the star port and climbed into his fighter he input the coordinates for a battle that had started him on the path of blood in the war against the Dark Harvesters. He leaned back as he mumbled “The darkness and light an eternal war to see who is stronger. Do I stand on the edge or do I fight on the frontlines. Which side do I fight for and why… These are all questions I must answer before I can learn to control the abilities I hold.” He looked up at R3 and smiled as the droid started to whistle and hoot text appearing on his display “Yea yea I know you don’t understand why I need to answer these questions.” HE shook his head and chuckled to himself as he leaned back activating the jump to hyperspace as he looked down at his list. “Two more stops and then things get serious.” He looked at the list his eyes darkening as he remembered the events of the last two places. Polis Messa and Kessel one of them he had lead a fleet the other he lead a band of pirates to kill slavers. He laughed to himself as he leaned back closing his eyes to rest. He woke up merely 1 and a half hours later he woke up to R3 hooting at him and text rolling across the screen he sighed and reached up toggling the hyperdrive as he looked out over the field of space before him. The remains of the destroyed defense asteroid still there Aedan sighed and closed his eyes taking a deep breath before he slowly let it out and let the memories flood forward into the core of his mind as he started to almost experience them again. His first assignment as a fleet commander and he had been tasked with defending an asteroid that held a device on it. Little did he know at the time but the device on the asteroid was a Phobis device and such a device when activated had a devastating effect on people. It enhanced the natural fears and angers they held and Aedan had been well within its range when it activated he had lost quite a few men to the initial effects of the device. If it hadn’t been for someone using a battle meditation he would have lost many more. Thanks to them and his on link to the force he was able to push his way through it and rally his men getting them out of the devices reach without incurring devastating losses. Then thanks to the republic and the CIS the men he had on the asteroid had almost all died thanks to the Republic using Ion cannons on the planet and the CIS having their droids open fire on his men. He bit back an angry curse as the screams of fear and pain echoed in his head and each death had been felt by him that day. That day he had changed and probably not for the best the young man who had spent time with no one just training his mind and body to fight had decided to close himself off farther. Now the people who thought they knew him only knew the fake face he put on to hide who he truly was inside. Inside he was broken barely hanging on by a string if only he had sent droids instead of men. If only he had thought of the consequences of doing what he had done. He should have stopped the CIS from landing for it was only after they landed that the device activated.

Aedan gasped as he finally broke out of the memories sweat coating his body as he clenched at his head. Finally pushing the memories back behind the barrier he had constructed Aedan took a few deep breaths as he reached down grasping his canteen with shaking hands taking a deep swallow from it before he finally started to calm down. The young man finally lifted his head his barriers in place the image he held back up before he started to slowly enter the coordinates for the next stop on his journey Myrkr where he would begin his combat training hopefully everything would turn out ok.
(TO BE CONTINUED IN PART 2)
 

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