Enlightenment

[Jacen Vadith]

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To gain a true understanding one must find a balance.​

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Darth Teran was a name known across the Galaxy, especially within the Galactic Alliance's Military personnel. As a Dark Lord of the Sith he conquered many lands, slew many enemies and mastered the force - despite his relatively young age, and ruthless tactics - he was at his very core, a realist. However, before Darth Teran existed, it was Jacen Vadith who did. A man who sought knowledge, and even vengeance. Vadith was not the greatest of Jedi in terms of the code, and his disobedience led him to succumb to the Dark Side. His mind twisted, tormented and corrupted into becoming the very thing he swore to destroy.

Although now Vadith makes a return to the world, not quite officially, but Darth Teran is no longer a moniker in which he identifies himself with, and now, he is just 'Vadith'. A man who is just another victim from the wars, a man who seeks knowledge in the Valley of the Jedi. His personality remains fractured, and his morality construed. Remnants of the Sith and the Jedi within him, in turmoil he is, unable to understand who he really is.

The clothing that he wore as a mixture of both Jedi and Sith robes and armor, only going to show his question. Beneath his boots the sands shifted as they sunk ever so slightly into them, Vadith's weary eyes staring forwards from beneath his mask. This place was basked in both the light and the dark, much like himself.

 

[Jacen Vadith]

Vadith didn't belong here, this was a place of the Light - where a battle was fought and lives were claimed. It was here that the Light prevailed. A man so full of the darkness was out of place, in enemy territory. Despite the fact that he hated the darkness in him, longing for the light to counter-act what he had done. Perhaps it was his hatred for the darkness that kept it within him. The 'Gray' sought the path of enlightenment here, one in which he could become attuned to both the Light and the Dark. As someone who has served both sides of the force, he know believes to gain the ultimate power within it there must be a balance. Although, he is blind to it's true effects. Live apathetically, or you will turn to the Darkside. Ignorance is bliss.

The sand billowed around him, creating a storm of sand as everything became blind. Now it was the force that must guide him, however, his power was stripped from him to an extent. The darkness was taken from him, and instead it was the light that shone bright. Visages peered through the sand, but not of which he was used to. It was no longer a flame, popping and cackling with a sinister demeanor. Instead it was a ghostly blue, a clear image of an older man, his hair long and clean whilst his features were worn. Although it was large, towering above him, appearing as if it were a giant.

"The Darkness does not eclipse the Light here, Sith. You must go, or we will be forced to act."

 

[Jacen Vadith]

His arm was raised, bending it so his forearm covered his face as he cowered into it. Although to no avail, the mask he wore would of protected him enough. Purely instinctual. The visage of the Ancient Jedi had caught him off-guard, but what else was one to expect upon a planet such as this. With such rich history and a deep rooted connection to the force, specifically the Light. The threat he was offered, or was it a chance? Most likely the latter - it wasn't a Jedi's place to make a threat.

When Vadith gave his response he spoke in a yell, after all it was over the top of a roaring sandstorm. Yet there was no aggression within it, remaining as passive as one such as himself could make it. His motions were none-threatening, and in accordance with his current mindset.

"You are mistaken, Master Jedi. I am no Sith, nor am I Jedi. Yet I seek answers to a question I don't know. I seek guidance, if not anything else."

 

[Jacen Vadith]

The ghostly apparition leaned forwards with an inquisitive gaze, his hands clasped behind his back. It's robes concealed what would've been it's skin, and as a result it's aged face was all that was visible. The larger than life figure overlook Vadith, judging him as if he could see the very contents of his soul, mind and so on from a mere outwards look. It had come to a conclusion, signifying as such with a simple, "Hmph." Before moving to stand once more, it's neck craned downwards in an attempt to look at him as it further spoke.

When it did it was a test, a way to test his resolve. Sensing the conflict within him, to allow him access or not the Jedi Apparition would first ensure that Vadith was going to be pure in his intent, whether the path of the light was something truly available to him or not, it would soon become apparent.

"Vadith." It spoke, the very venom of 'v' was oh so apparent. "Once a Jedi Knight, you served the order valiantly but with a certain degree of corruption. Your Master to blame, would that be so...? Kodai Damore, no?"

 

[Jacen Vadith]

The sandstorm seemed to fade, the violent sounds it emitted began to disappear as did the sand itself until it all fell down in one motion - briefly sending a small wave of it in all directions. Vadith stood strong, unfazed and and unmoving throughout. At least at this moment he could speak clearly and calmly without trying desperately to do so. For now he stood in the one place, his head peering upwards at the Force Ghost ahead of him which could only be assumed as a Jedi. For all he knew it was, some kind of deception it would be if it turned out as something else, now wouldn't it?

The internal struggle raged on within his mind. The Dark Side clawed at his mind, accompanied by the faces of the dead he can recall and one such figure in particular: Kor Vexen. In a way he was thankful of Vexen, offering him the path of the light through his own terrible actions, but he resented him at the same time. Such needless slaughter was beneath anyone worthy of respect - and so, Vexen got none from Vadith. Yet as he replies now it's somberly, confused and distracted. His mind someplace else, somewhere... better.

"I was a Jedi, yes. A Knight who sought peace for the galaxy. My Master was different to most, he believed in a balance from both sides of the force, through that balance one's power could be immeasurable. Although he was killed before I could learn everything I could from him, perhaps that's wha-"

 

[Jacen Vadith]

The Jedi didn't take too kindly to this, no, not at all. The Ghostly Figure formed an expression of disdain as he quite literally looked down upon the now neutral Force User. To attain such a greatness, this Jedi had followed the code throughout his entire life - however long that may be - any hint of the darkness was disgusting to him, that one could give in to such a thing was lowly. Yet still, he was a Jeid, and the Jedi were forgiving if anything. Though this 'test' needed to remain, absolute certainty was required.

The internal conflict within the mere man before him was visible to him, the pictures whilst not physical to Vadith were to the Jedi - he saw what Vadith dreamed, what he thought and so on and so forth. Damore, Vexen, the Sith and the Jedi. All of which Vadith thought of were pictured out. And it was terrifying, even for someone who had transcended the physical plane. Though before Vadith could even finish, the Jedi interjected.

"You were a powerful Knight, admired by many but a burden to few. The Jedi Council knew of your volatile nature, and viewed you as a ticking timebomb. The level-headedness of Damore was supposed to be your saving grace, but it proved to be the instrument of your destruction. It was he who twisted your young and impressionable mind into thinking such a balance could truly be achievable. When his passing came, the code was nothing but an obstacle for you."

 

[Jacen Vadith]

He had no words to offer the Jedi. If he were to speak he knew he would explode with the anger, the talk of his shortcomings and failures was never something he took to lightly. Only because he had so few, and those beneath him never did dare speak to him about them - either out of respect, or fear. Either way, he kept to himself in this moment of elevated darkness. The rage building within him to a point in which his fists clenched and the ground beneath him was ready to tremble, however, the moment passed - and he was at peace once again.

Within his own head a figure had stood before him, two in fact, a young woman he recognized from many years ago and his former Master. They stood beside each other within his head, not touching, for they never knew each other personally. Though through the force, perhaps they do. They shared the same fate after all, in death they bonded. A conjoined watchful eye over Vadith, feeling the pity and sadness of what he had become - though now maybe they were at peace as his redemption began.

All the while this ghostly figure continued on his truthful ramble about the past events.

 

[Jacen Vadith]

A moment of reprieve was offered to Vadith by the Jedi, the badgering would continue in time. The rising anger and ferocity was sensed by the Jedi, believing that he found the very thing he was looking for in a prospective agent of the Dark Side. It was a subtle grin that formed across the aged and long dead man's face for but a brief moment, whilst a look of approval of sorts replaced it as the light returned to him as the darkness subsided.

The path to the dark side was not one that was good for the soul, it was damaging and heartbreaking for those without the mind of a pure psychopath. Vadith's life was full of tragedies, or so he thought, but even then he experienced them all the same. All of which that the Jedi had known, viewing them as buttons to push as he would further recount the events of his life to see if this Darkness would reveal itself.

"In your bid for revenge you paid the ultimate price; your mind was twisted, torn apart and corrupted until you became the very thing you swore to destroy. Vadith no longer remained, and in his place Darth Teran had emerged. A vile servant of the Dark Side. It was here your powers flourished, through your anger and personal hatred you became a force to be reckoned with - a known enemy of the Galaxy and innocent life. Though now, you leave that cause, but why?"

 

[Jacen Vadith]

The truth hurt, that much was an absolute certainty. The truth behind who he was, and what he had done was something that never sat easy with himself after coming to his own realization of who he was, or is. Vadith's head was bowed in thought for a brief moment, the memories flooding back into his mind as he recalled all that was done throughout his life. The bad outweighed the good, but what if at this moment he could turn it all around. All that was needed was a simple chance.

His head was raised, and beneath that mask he stared upwards with dedicated eyes - his eyes full of personal passion, set with a goal that he would achieve regardless of the outcome here today. The 'Gray' knows who he is now, no longer is Darth Teran, and no longer is he the Jedi Knight Jacen Vadith. Now he is just Vadith. A man torn apart and put back together by himself, and he was here to go down a path of his own.

"I have broken free of the corruption that has plagued my mind, and now I seek the Light; not the path of the Jedi, but the Light."

 

[Jacen Vadith]

"You belong to neither the Light, nor the Darkness. You will stand alone, as you always have."

Then that was it. The visage had faded, disappearing into obscurity. The question as to whether it truly ever existed or not was up for debate, but in a world such as this, at a place such as this, nothing was certain - whilst that was likely. It's words had lingered through reality, however. The Jedi were never Vadith's home, his own conflicting ideals made it so whilst with the Sith he wasn't truly evil as they were. It was somewhere else that he belonged, somewhere in the middle. A gray area, perhaps. Where both the Light and Dark are tolerated too a degree, a place in which the Darkside cannot corrupt him, whereas the Light cannot control him.

A burden had vanished, relief washed over him as his first steps in a while were made. Furthering himself throughout the valley, he sought something else, a place to meditate. A place to learn, and he was certain that he would find it.

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Over the coming days Vadith remained in a pure state of isolated meditation in an attempt to cleanse the darkness from his mind. Although the task was daunting, and proved impossible. He was too far gone, and as a portion of it was removed some remained just as the light rejoined him but not entirely. Perhaps that Jedi was right, he didn't belong to the Light nor the Darkness, and as a result he remains alone in the middle.

That suited him just fine, however, for he came to the realization that Jedi and the Sith were bound to fail. For the Sith wiped themselves out, just as the Jedi crumble beneath the realistic world that they pretend does not exist outside of their temples. To understand a true mastery of the force one must acknowledge both, and wield them in tandem. The Jedi, Jacen Vadith, was dead just as the Sith, Darth Teran, was dead. All that remained now was Vadith.