Dragosian Pilot Hideout

[Carth Winston]

name: Dragosia [this was the original base, but was kept hidden away. no one besides the Dragosian Pilots know where it is.]

classifacation: Hideout, Hidden Base

location: on telorok, hidden by forest, inside a mountain near a metropolis. the metropolis is called Avalon City. being so close to a metropolis, they sometimes have a hard time keeping themselves secret. defenses tells you how they keep secret.

affilation: owned by the Dragosian pilots

population: currently 3, medium size [it can hold 50 people, at its current size]

defenses: armed turrets at gate [2] and at secret entrance [4] [the last ones are camouflaged]

description: owned by the dragosian pilots, it looks rundown on the outside. however, inside, it look luxurious and well made. the outside look is the get people to think its old and useless. run by three people, and lead by Carth, it is more than enough to fit the three people. as of right now, Carth isnt going to be interviewed, so, we are going on appearances. with the defending turrets, it seems kinda safe, but, really, it isn't. robots and telorks walk in and take stuff, all because the turrets are weak. still, at least they tried.

intent: to give my faction a base.

 

[Darth Pyrrhus]

Under review

 

[Darth Pyrrhus]

[member="Carth Winston"]

Looks like you drew me again. The same notes I made at the beginning of your NPC submission (Sam Lingor) applies here as well. I will need you to elaborate on most areas. With that said, let's get working on getting this one approved!

name: none [the base is secret]

I will need to see an actual name here. You may note in brackets that the information would not be known IC, but for the sake of this submission you will provide it.

classifacation: Miscellaneous

I'm going to need you to be more specific here. Either replace "Miscellaneous" with something else or add a few more descriptive tags/examples in brackets.

location: on tolorok, hidden by forest, in mountain

I see you have submitted a custom planed named "Telorok". I assume it is the same one. Please provide a link to the submission. I will also need you to be a more descriptive here. Please elaborate on the base's location. If you could manage 2-3 sentences, that would be great.

population: currently 3, medium size

What does medium size mean? Three people live there now, but how many does it have the capacity to host?

defenses: armed turrets at gate and at secret entrance [the last ones are camouflaged]

I will need an exact number for turrets and other defences. I will also require a link to either Wookiepedia or the Factory for the turrets used.

description: owned by the dragosian pilots, it looks rundown on the outside. however, inside, it look luxurious and well made. the outside look is the get people to think its old and useless. run by three people, and lead by Carth, it is more than enough to fit the three people.

I will need you to elaborate and be more descriptive on this part. I would like to see one full paragraph here.

Thanks

 

[Darth Pyrrhus]

[member="Carth Winston"]

What's the status of this submission?

 

[Darth Pyrrhus]

[member="Carth Winston"]

I see you've tended to the requested edits. In the future, tag the judge in a reply to the submission so that they will be made aware.

With this in mind, I will ask for a 10 post dev thread for this base. This should focus on the construction of the base, and include acquiring the defensive turrets and seeing them set up. Tag me when you're done, or if you have any questions.

Thanks

 

[Darth Pyrrhus]

[member="Carth Winston"]

Marked for archival due to inactivity. You can PM either [member="Valiens Nantaris"] or [member="Lorelei Darke"] to get it back when you're ready to have it reviewed.

Archive

 

[Quietus]

Archived