Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Dear Old Friend

Music

Dxun
Mandalorian Outpost
If Keira was being honest, the name [member="Julius Sedaire"] hadn't crossed her mind in months, since the two last spoke and looked upon all that could have been. He hadn't crossed her mind because in a way he'd never left, always somehow existing on the fringes of her subconscious no matter how many months had passed. She had kept everything he'd given her during their last meeting in the same envelope it had been delivered in, save for the soul diamond, which she had kept in a small display in order to remind her of where she came from and those that had passed before her. It was a welcome symbol that she suffered from mortality just the same as the rest of the galaxy, and that no matter what she had a home to return to both on Corellia and with the man that had gifted it to her.

The two hadn't spoken since then, and both of them were equally at fault just as much as they weren't. The life of a Mandalorian had swept her up all too quickly once she declared herself among their number again. Nothing about the banner she'd worn had been forgotten, and she had picked it up just as easily as she had shed it nearly six months ago. Warrior was a mold she fit all too easily, and in filling those shoes once again she resigned herself once more to the mercy of the battlefield, which had nipped all too quickly at her heels. And its devastation had hit home and hit hard, with her younger brother losing the use of his left arm in the first warzone she had set foot on since her departure. The damage from there had only snowballed, striking most recently with the orbital bombardment of Myrkr, a planet now under Mando'ade jurisdiction and on its way to being whole once more.

Only recently had the idea of contacting him again surfaced as a possibility, but it was one she had pushed aside for a long while before, uncertain of what remained between them. Their relationship had always been a funny thing, beginning as a scrap in a bar that had turned into him inviting her back to what passed for his residence. Since then they had crossed paths intermittently, rarely on purpose and oftentimes with an entirely different intention in mind. There were only a handful of times where one had called upon the other, and never had she been the one to request his presence. The galaxy itself seemed to have a purpose for them, but even that hadn't seen fit to bring them together.

And so she had ceded to doing it herself. With the personal comms he'd given her she sent a simple message that requested he meet her on Dxun, a moon of the planet Onderon which so happened to be the capital of the Mando'ade, the only resurgent Mandalorian group to have gained any traction and notoriety in the galaxy. No doubt he would know from whom the transmission originated as soon as it came in, but she had left her name regardless. From then on all there was left to do was wait, and patience wasn't a virtue she often practiced. She had busied herself elsewhere until he notified her of his arrival, cleaning her kit and performing much needed maintenance, along with tidying her quarters. When finally he'd made his presence known she'd gone to the hangar of the outpost, allowing him a landing pad of her own authority and awaiting to see a man she wasn't certain she'd entirely missed.
 
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How did you sum up [member="Keira Ticon"]? That was a question needed a lot of whiskey and time. Much less how he and her regarded the other. Friends? Enemies? Would be lovers? The lines blurred so much the whole situation fast became something more like to a chaotic drug-fueled impressionist painting from a speed addicted zeltron with a tic. Either way, it wasn't until the ship settled down that he did much more than fly. And think. They had done their usual thing, last time. Met. Drank. Came dangerously close to the matter at hand, then left before anything serious happened. It was their way. Always had been. Except last time, he had given her a soul diamond, from the ashes of his own family. And what amounted to a spare key to his 'house'. Even if they were just coordinates and pass-codes to his various bolt holds.

As fingers skittered over control panel buttons and switches, a phantom sensation ran up through his sense memory. With his training, and the fading scars from his accident Flow Walking, he could feel it as if it were real. A hand, weathered but still somehow soft in it's own way, clasped in his. A hand that wasn't balled into a fist or extending it's middle finger to him for once. Jarring, he set down the ship with a soft mutter. @Jorus Merril had made him this boat. He'd be loathe to scrape or ding it. But he was still getting used to flying it. His beloved ship from the Outback was a bit too conspicuous and large for some things.

Standing, he strode down the ramp as it lowered, his mind slightly jumpy. Halfway, he was prepared for a set-up. He had forgone the more "business like" attire he'd taken to working as a Judge in the Outer Rim. But, given his history with the Mandalorians, and with Keira, he was still wearing armorweave. Just discreetly under his old battered spacers coat and clothes. A massive bryar pistol was strapped to one thigh, and a DE-10 heavy variant to the other. And, as always, a lightsaber dangled from his belt, making a soft sound every now and again as the white metal scraped against things. The stroll was casual, easy, with a grace that belied the goofy grin on his face. Anyone green in war, or who didn't know the man that emerged into the hangar, would think he was utterly at ease in his own house.

Even his emotions as his eyes scanned the place were smooth. Only the faintest disturbance in them could be detected by almost anyone. But when his eyes fell on the dark haired warrior who had nearly knocked most of his teeth out their first meeting, there was a jump detectable to anyone with a brain. His step quickened, stride lengthened. In his mind, he still reigned himself in as his hand raised in greeting. She had called to him, and that had never happened. He half expected to hear some great tragedy had befallen her, or that she was dying of some incurable space plague. And part of his mind was already prepared to kick the ass of whatever warlord, crime mogul, or virus had tried something. But, it was possible she just wanted to see him.

For once, his greeting was calm. Measured. And though his tone chirped with mirth, there was only a hint of mischief in his eyes. But the words were casually insulting as ever.

"Well now, this is a first for you princess... Did you tire of surrounding yourself with grunts in tin cans, decide to call up a real man? Or did you just miss my pretty face? Good to see you, either way..."
 
As she watched the ship settle and begin its landing procedures, Keira wasn't entirely sure what she was expecting - or feeling, for that matter. In the moments before he disembarked she realized that she wasn't really sure what her intention was in calling him here, only that she had wanted to see him again after so long a time apart. For once she wanted to spend time with him as they were, with no agendas or other motivations getting in the way. While she had grown closer to him than most were privy to over the years, she still felt as if she had never truly known him, as he was, beneath the sly, crooked grin and carefree facade everyone who called themselves Corellian put on.

In the same manner he'd never gotten to know her, always coming close but never quite breaking through the shell she always hid behind, it being an intrinsic part of her act in which everything was fine. He may have been aware of her trauma but he didn't know the half of it, and she was certain the same went both ways. In some sense they were two strangers playing at being something more, and in others they were decidedly something more while pretending they were just friends. Whichever way one decided to look at it, they had never admitted to each other or themselves just where their relationship lay. It was everywhere and nowhere all at once, and that had suited her just fine, until now.

Now she wanted some kind of stability in a life that seemed to become more tumultuous by the day, with the individuals she could look to for some semblance of normalcy becoming few and far between. Julius was one with which everything made sense, even with the inherent instability his presence radiated. Just knowing he existed somehow made everything okay, even if their present relationship transcended nothing more than thinly veiled insults and sporadic meaningful conversation. For once she couldn't immediately discern which path this interaction would follow. Both of them had once again changed far too much for anything presently in the cards to be certain, and besides, she had always spoken against the danger of making assumptions.

A genuine, crooked grin materialized just as soon as the carefully taunting words left his mouth. "You assume far too much for someone of your supposed intelligence. Didn't we just have a talk about that the last time?" Back-and-forth was easier with him than with anyone else. There was less concern for overstepping bounds and more of one for feeling the other out in what had become commonplace verbal spars. It was through gauging something so simple that each decided where the present meeting would end up. From the second he'd stepped down the ramp she'd looked over every piece of weaponry and determined he was far less on edge than he had been the last time. In comparison she was just as lightly armed, sporting only a pistol and a tomahawk, forgoing a lightsaber or anything else that would mark her explicitly as a Force sensitive.

The distance between them was crossed just as quickly by her, and without reason or warning she pulled him in for a tight hug, resting her head on his shoulder and breathing in all that he was. "I missed you."

[member="Julius Sedaire"]
 
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He smiled at the banter, sliding forth with all the comfort and ease it ever did. What they were might be a murky quagmire of chaos and confusion, no arguing that. But war, death, and the entire galaxy trying to destroy itself couldn't keep them from coming to the other's aid. When Corelli had bled and burned under the One Sith as it collapsed, [member="Keira Ticon"] was one of the first he called. She answered, bringing clansmen and family, and stood side by side as they freed their ancestral home. Mandalorian she might be, by choice, but the same rocket fuel that boiled in his veins ran too in hers.

Then the hug came. Sudden and unexpected. Fierce as she was, it seemed appropriate until she rested her head on his shoulder. It wasn't a softness in that moment. Nothing about Keira could ever really fully be called soft, he didn't think. But there was a simplistic honesty and openess to the gesture that hit him close to home. He was well versed in women. In bar pickups, seduction, and being two sectors away by morning. But this? This rawness caught him off guard and unbalanced, and he wasn't used to that. He struggled for a moment, and then wrapped one arm around her waist, the other patting her hair, stroking the raven locks gently. Holding her as she seemed to at once fall apart and stand tall.

This was still the Keira he knew, but another layer. And honesty deserved like in kind.

"Shhh... I missed you too, cyar'ika... You should know better though. Nothing could keep me from you too long..."

The Mando'a wasn't the best pronounced, and had a funny Corellian twang to it. But the word was easily able to be understood the moment he spoke it. And so he stood there in the hangar bay, holding a woman he still wasn't sure of in embrace. Onlookers stared, confused, smirking, or otherwise. But he didn't care or react. The whole galaxy had shrunk to one moment, and one person, and one action. And in that instance, every ounce of his attention was spent therein. The world could have turned to ash, and the Green Jedi wouldn't have noticed
 
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Her eyes slid shut as they stood in their embrace, and for the first time in a long while Keira didn't tense or shy away when another offered a semblance of affection or a gentle hand. Instead she accepted it wholeheartedly, allowing herself to relax in his arms and not concern herself with what lurked around the next corner. She grounded herself in the feeling of his arms around her, finding comfort in the way his fingers gently combed through her hair and security in the way he held her close with a ferocity that rivaled her own. For a long time she didn't move, only holding him tighter as if he were the last hope in the galaxy - and in a way, for her, he was.

Home had always been an oddity for her, because it had never really amounted to any number of four walls she returned to at the end of the day. It had taken her a long time to realize, but home was of much more depth than someone like her would perhaps ever be capable of truly understanding. But one thing she did know for certain, one truth she recognized above all else was that the closest she had come to experiencing that sense of belonging she had always heard about was when she was with Julius. From the moment he'd entered the hangar every breath had somehow come easier, but it wasn't until now she had been able to wholly come to terms with it.

When finally she did find it in herself to let him go something about her seemed to have broken and been built up all at once, the iron in her bones having relaxed into something more malleable and softer to the touch. For the first time in months she looked up into the face of a man who had been her on-again off-again everything and nothing all at once, but this was the first time in looking at him that she saw something more permanent than just another one-off meeting before they both vanished from the other's life for who knew how long. There was a mutual certainty between them that this would be the last time they would let the other walk away, simply because that was no longer an option.

"I don't want to be without you anymore." Her voice softened, but her eyes never left his. "I can't be without you."

[member="Julius Sedaire"]
 
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It was at once an odd and natural feeling that coursed through him right now. But throughout and over it all was an overwhelming feeling of peace and comfort. He ran fingertips over her cheek, smiling for perhaps the first time in her presence in a genuine way. There was no crookedness. No sarcasm laced insults that acted as a vehicle for his affection. Knowing their lives and ways, that would never go away from their interactions. But in this present moment, he just was. Tension flooded away from him and he sighed lightly, tapping a forefinger to her nose playfully, and shaking his head as if in response to something. When he spoke, there was just him in his voice. The culture affectation and Coreward straightening of his words gave way in earnest to an Earthy accent of Corellia.

"C'mon now. You were never really without me. But you want me by your side, that's where I'll be as often as fate allows. I don't like the idea of leaving you alone any more than you do being without me. We are linked, you and I, and I'm better with you than without."

Here he seemed to hesitate, realizing what he was admitting... Realizing what he was admitting to both himself and her. Panic welled in him, a feeling of oppressive pressure pressing on his shoulders, and for a moment his instinct screamed to run. Disengage. To get as far from this sensation and its origins. But he took a deep breath, steadying himself by leaning his forehead against hers, shuddering as he calmed nerves and washed out panicked thoughts. This was Keira. He could trust her, odd as that admission was. She might hurt him if he deserved it, but he was confident that she'd never toy with his spirit and heart.

"I'm not exactly experienced with this monogamy and relationship stuff... So forgive me if I stumble... We'll have to make our own rules as we go anyway, neh?"

@Keira Ticon
 
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Rare were the moments Keira let anyone get this close without the intention to kill, but if there was one person she always made an exception for, it was this man. Few were her previous relationships, and nothing good had come of them save the children she cherished and loved in a way she had never cared for another. Her subconscious told her there was no reason this one would be any different than those others, but for once she brushed that nagging voice aside, trusting completely in everything Julius said. This would be different simply because he was different in a way she couldn't explain, his singular presence bringing with it a surety that was rare in her life, a certainty that no matter what happened, he would be there, somehow.

Her hands found his as they stood there, and gently she threaded their fingers together, squeezing gently as if to assure herself and him that this moment was real. The smile that turned up the corners of her mouth was as vulnerable as it was genuine, and she only had eyes for him and the moment they shared, uncaring of the looks they were receiving and the comments she would hear later. None of that mattered when he was around and they were together, that alone making everything right in the galaxy. "No more disappearing. I don't like not knowing if you're safe." It was almost hypocritical for her to make those demands given the numerous battlefields she somehow found herself on, but at least she made an effort to notify him of where she would be deployed next.

For years she had never been certain of where she belonged, constantly struggling to find her place in a galaxy that didn't seem to want her. But she had found that place here, with him, and already she realized she was afraid of letting it go and losing the first home she'd ever had. "Aanor ishiia zals. I guess we should have paid more attention to that." They had been experts at dancing around the true meaning of their bond until this moment, when finally it had dawned on them that they were getting too old to keep running from what could quite possibly be the only certainty they had left in the galaxy. "It's about time, cyar'ika."

Carefully, as if worried she would shatter the moment if she moved too quickly, she leaned in and pressed their lips together in a kiss.

[member="Julius Sedaire"]
 


Now that certainly shook him a bit, that kiss. He didn't recoil, he didn't let an surprise show. Just pulled her into him tight and smiled when they parted, shaking his head slightly, a bemused expression on his face as he leaned his forehead to hers, brushing hair from her face. Moments passed as they stayed there like that after the kiss, and he wondered what that meant? Wasn't she married to some Zambrano? Did he really care? He'd killed Sith before, and they didn't really scare or worry him just by virtue of their religion. Eventually he pulled back slightly, still smiling softly.

"Fine, no more disappearing. You know me, I won't stay put for long. But you'll know where I'm at always. Just don't be surprised if it's a bit seedy. I've a job and appearances to keep up, after all. Can't go soft just because i'm in love, right?"

Tapping a long finger to his temple, the smile flashed again, and he nodded to her in a soft way as he stood with her in his arms. The next part came slowly, with great care taken over the words and thoughts behind them. This had happened with a speed that was frighteningly rapid, but with a natural feeling to it that kept the panic a silent whisper in the very back recesses of his mind.

"I won't be far from Corellia. My time on the Rim as a Judge showed me I can build things. I can put down some semblance of roots. And I need to make sure I do more than just make our home free.. I could use someone I trust beside me, to keep me going. And we all know you're more vicious than a vornskr when you're angry anyway... What say we visit home, see how things are going? Maybe introduce you to the family, if they're still kicking.."

He waited then, eyeing her. Family hadn't been something he'd ever really talked about. It hurt him to, and this offer... It was problematic, hidden under the prospect of more battle, but something as meaningful as the kiss they had shared moments ago.

[member="Keira Ticon"]
 
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All at once the tension dissipated and increased, the singular response between them seeming to have been a shared relief, the galaxy itself having breathed a sigh of, Finally. It's about time, you two. For just a few seconds Keira let her eyes close, basking in the warmth of his presence and the feeling of being wholly wanted by another individual. Her eyes opened in order to watch him speak, and she couldn't help but smile in a soft, gentle way when he spoke of being in love. In that moment she felt weightless and infinite, as if for once everything would be alright. Had all of this happened so fast with anyone else she would have already distanced herself, but somehow such a fast pace was natural for them, nothing ever transpiring exactly as it should.

"I just want you to be safe." Her voice was quiet, and she reached up with her right hand to gently brush her fingers across his cheek, the calloused touch strangely gentle for one so attuned to violence. "I don't want to lose anyone I care about again. I can't." Her hand fell to once more intertwine their fingers together, the sensation of his touch the only thing reminding her that this was real. Far too often in her life had she experienced pain at the hands of another, and so rare were the moments that there was someone willing to be gentle with her as she was, taking in all of her broken pieces and rough edges and not trying to smooth them out but rather accepting them as they were.

The mention of family gave her pause, but she didn't falter visibly, her memory drifting back to the soul gem he'd gifted her. That had belonged to him, which begged the question of the family he spoke of, and if visiting them meant traveling to the same graveyard where her parents were buried. It was an issue she wouldn't press, well aware of just how sensitive the topic was and just how much value the heirloom he'd passed on held. So instead of raising any questions she only nodded carefully. "I'd like to go back home with you. It's about time we returned together." Corellia had never seemed like home until put in the context of their bond, and she was okay with returning to the planet and all its painful memories so long as he was by her side.

[member="Julius Sedaire"]
 

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