Private Barefoot Adventures

[Iandre Athlea]

There were a few things at this time that were familiar to Iandre. She had tried to adjust, and for the most part, she thought she had. One day, it all hit her hard. Everything she had known was truly gone. She could not find a speck of anything that reminded her of home.

She had this day away from classes and training. In an attempt to calm down and recenter herself, she found a quiet spot on Aurora Station. If she had been thinking clearly, she would have stayed in her quarters. However, that hadn't happened, and she wandered the dim area she found herself in.

One might say she could be homesick, but that wasn't entirely true. There was no going back for her, and she just needed to accept it. The usually alert woman was close to breaking, and she stopped to lean against the wall. Unfortunately for her, it wasn't a wall. Instead, it was a door, and it opened with her weight on it.

Tumbling to the floor, her braids fell to the front of her face. Pushing herself up into a semi-sitting position, only to come face to feet with one of the three people who initially rescued her. The one she was curious about and had followed here into the Lilaste Order and Diarchy.

"Oh! Excuse me, Master Zinayn."

Her health had considerably improved since that day, and her cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

Zinayn

 

[Zinayn]

Zinayn sat in a dimly lit room, hands folded in his lap, feeling the Force flow through him. The activities of the soldiers of the Order and the emotions that came with them entered his mind, and he was aware of them. He dwelled on them. Feeling. Learning. The personnel on Aurora Station were some of the most disciplined warriors he'd ever met, and that was reflected in what the Force seemed to whisper to him.

Calm. Focus. Sharpness of the mind. Vigilant. Breaking. Skill. Zinayn paused. Breaking? He rose to his feet, his slightly infrared vision as a Chiss letting him see easily, even in the barely illuminated room. He approached the door, still feeling the source of the feeling getting closer. Before he could get to the door, it opened and in tumbled the Padawan he'd found on Chiron. His gaze tracked her to the floor.

"Ah. Hello Iandre. Were you...looking for something?" he asked, brow furrowed slightly in a genuine attempt to try and help her find whatever she was searching for. The way she entered the room suggested that she'd fallen on the door, or otherwise put all her weight on it. Maybe the floors had been cleaned recently.

Iandre Athlea

 

[Iandre Athlea]

Finishing her movement of sitting, she looked at Zinayn's knees and did not stand up. With what she felt was a rather undignified sniffle, she tried to stop the tears that still threatened to break through. Shaking her head and gulping a couple of times, she finally finished with a deep and shuddery breath.

"Looking for something wasn't exactly on my mind. More I think I was trying to find peace? I'm not entirely sure, to be honest. I miss my time, my old life—the things I will never see again. I'm not sure if that makes sense. I had a good conversation with Master Laphisto not too long ago. Maybe in time, it'll be easier, but right now...it's hard."

Sniffling one last time, Iandre looked up at him and wasn't as embarrassed as she had been a few minutes ago.

"You can call me Ian if you want. Most people shortened my name. I'm sorry for interrupting your meditation."

If he asked her to leave, she would, but maybe what she needed was companionship—a friend to talk to and confide in. There wasn't one in her life, and perhaps Zinayn could fill that role.

Zinayn

 

[Zinayn]

Consoling another being had never been Zinayn's strongsuit. Neither had noticing when someone needed that. He could feel her pain through the Force, and he shifted uncomfortably. He could hear the tears nearly falling already. He'd taken the same shuddering breaths many times after Csilla's destruction. The tears had never come, though.

"Looking for peace? Well, I suppose that's why you stumbled into the meditation room. The Force has a funny way of doing things," he said, stepping back to allow her space to stand up. "Missing your old life is normal at this time. I did that as well. When my homeworld was destroyed I found my heart throbbing in pain every day. Less so for the people that I lost and more for what my people as a whole lost. Our capital, our jewel, gone. As well as millions of Chiss. The way I got over it quickly was training every day until I was too fatigued to feel...though I'm not sure I strongly recommend it."

He stepped over to a low wooden table in the back of the room and struck a match, lighting a slightly scented candle and scooting it to the center of the table. He turned back to her, gesturing towards the mat that covered the entire floor. "I find that meditation with time is the best combination to find harmony within yourself and the Force," he said, sitting cross-legged on the floor.

"Ian. I see," he said as if testing the name. "It reminds me of Chiss names. You see, my full name is Irizi'nay'nuru, and my core name is Zinayn. When Chiss first see each other in a formal setting, we introduce ourselves by our full names. After that, we use core names most of the time," he explained.

He found himself suddenly curious about the Padawan's old life. He'd only heard about such ancient history from passerby and the occasional remark from the High Commander. The Chiss education system had never bothered to teach the students anything about the galaxy 900 years ago. Other than the tale of Grand Admiral Thrawn and the Empire, along with certain Chiss expeditions into the Chaos and political crises within the Ascendancy, the midagers had learned nothing about the galaxy at large.

"So...what are the things you find yourself missing the most?"

Iandre Athlea

 

[Iandre Athlea]

Giving Zinayn half a smile, she stood up when he stepped back to give her room. She listened to him and felt a connection with him again. It was something she had felt from the moment they first met. It was a feeling she couldn't quite recognize, and when he told her about his world, it flared up again. He was a few inches taller than she was, and the old Jedi looked at his eyes and could tell he was telling the truth.

"No, I don't think that would be wise for me. I'm still recovering from my almost eternal sleep. Did I ever thank you for finding me?"

Her rescue was more fuzzy than she would like to admit, but she wanted to make sure she had thanked him. Watching as he lit a candle and invited her to meditate with him, she removed her shoes. Taking a seat on the mat across the table from him, she agreed the Force was funny at times. She just hoped she didn't go back into as deep a meditation as she had to keep herself alive.

Closing her eyes and drawing in a breath through her nose, she listened to Zinayn tell her about the Chiss naming convention. She opened them when he finished and nodded silently.

"You are the first Chiss I've met. I am sorry for your loss. You mentioned you didn't have as much feeling for your family but for your people as a whole. That is commendable. Was anything recovered from the destruction?"

Looking at him over the flame, she heard his question and had to blink her eyes a few times before she felt confident she wasn't going to burst into tears.

"The familiarity of the Temple, the structure of my days as a Youngling. As an adult, I guess I still miss that old structure. I'm getting into things here, but I don't yet have the camaraderie I had on Coruscant. Maybe it wasn't peace I was after, but friendship. I miss that.

"Is there anything you miss from Csilla?"

Iandre also missed her Master's, but did not mention her yet.

Zinayn

 

[Zinayn]

Zinayn took a seat on the opposite side of the table, still reminiscing about his home. He had never been one to catch jokes or understand sarcasm, and especially not recognizing someone's feelings and their consequences, even though he could feel them through the Force. However, Iandre's pain seemed to suffocate the room. As he was the only one here that she seemed to want to talk to, he felt obligated to do so, even if it had always been awkward to console people.

When she asked about the destruction, he held back the urge to wince. "The destruction was quite complete. However, I ventured to Csilla (or what remains of it) a year ago. I found what I believe to be the capital city, Csaplar, floating in space as a sort of asteroid. I landed on the surface and there were some ruins. I didn't place a beacon on the asteroid, though, so I don't know where it is now."

He had a habit of looking people in the eye when speaking to them, but as a Chiss, his glowing crimson eyes might have been intimidating to someone in a precarious emotional state, he just realized. He averted his eyes to the candle as she blinked back tears.

"I see. Structure and schedule can be important in life. Without one, I suppose you might feel overwhelmed with what you have to do. Some like that, and others like the chaos of not having structure." He shifted slightly as she mentioned camaraderie and friendship. At school as a midager, he didn't have many friends and was often seen as a downer. Thus, he'd gotten used to not having companions to talk to and have fun with. Maybe he was missing out. Maybe it was too late to start.

"Friends...I didn't have many at home. So I guess I just got used to not having them," he said at a near-whisper. His voice became immediately louder when the subject changed. "From Csilla, I think the thing I miss the most is...well what the planet represented. I miss the Chiss Ascendancy as a whole. My people now are scattered across the galaxy, many still poor refugees struggling to make a living. I just miss what my people had."

Did he miss what his people had, or his people? Did he miss having other Chiss around that could relate to his experiences? Of all his days with the Lilaste Order, he'd never seen another of his kin. Never seen another Chiss that he could talk to about their capital's destruction. Maybe he wanted that.

Iandre Athlea

 

[Iandre Athlea]

Repositioning herself slightly, she listened with all her attention and focus on Zinayn. While she did occasionally try to read these people through the Force to test their honesty, she had yet to catch any of them in a lie. Unless he blocked her attempt, she would do to him now. Iandre didn't doubt him; she wanted to get to know him by reading him. She also opened herself to allow him to read her if he wished.

She tipped her head slightly when he said he wouldn't be able to find the asteroid again. Maybe he had given up, but she felt it might be possible to find it again. Following his gaze, she looked at the candle with him and listened to his calm tone. Allowing herself to start going into a light meditation, she had no fear of falling in deeper.

Keeping her eyes closed, she quietly told him of how the Jedi of her time felt about personal relationships and attachments.

"They frowned on us attaching closely. If you were selected to be a Padawan, then your Master became your closest friend, confidant, and as close to family as you were allowed. So I suppose I didn't have any friends growing up either. Companions, yes, but I wasn't close to anybody until I got assigned my Master. Gem was telling me about the changes that have happened with the rules. I'm not sure I'm ready to accept them. That's another reason I'm here instead of there."

As he spoke about what he missed, she could understand exactly what he meant. Coruscant was the shining jewel of the Grand Republic, and maybe it still was. She had yet to return there to find out.

"Can it be rebuilt somewhere? Not the planet itself, but your people. The Ascendancy could come back."

Wiggling her toes a little, she enjoyed the feeling of the air on her feet.

Zinayn

 

[Zinayn]

Zinayn barely registered Iandre Athlea attempting to read him. His mental defenses had been fortified over the years of never letting anyone get into his head. Friends might have let each other do such things, but the Chiss had never allowed anyone to enter his mind before, and simply never expected that to happen. And so he continued staring at the candle, seeming to not recognize the woman before him attempting to connect. Not on purpose, but out of habit. He also didn't realize Ian had left herself open to an attempt by him, and he continued to keep himself locked in his own mind, as usual.

Seeing her relax a little, he did the same, keeping his eyes closed. Memories meandered into the dark space before his eyes, playing like a movie on the big screen in the briefing room. He frowned slightly and shut them down and pushed them away before resuming his meditation. He listened as Iandre talked about the old Jedi Order, frown growing as she continued talking.

"They didn't let you get close to people? I can see where they were coming from; it suppose they thought attachments equals high possibility to turn to the dark side. But not exposing you to attachments, which are inevitable, would be even more risky, in my view. If you weren't allowed attachments, and you felt attached to someone later, you wouldn't know how to deal with that bond breaking. All that pent up negative emotion would lead to the dark side. If they had given you the opportunity to learn from attachments and find a balance between them and your duties as a Jedi...maybe there wouldn't have been so many 'fallen Jedi' that ended up causing so much death and destruction," he said, explaining his views on this old Jedi 'tradition'.

As she changed the subject to Csilla, he smiled slightly at her optimism before his expression became solemn again. "The logistics, resources, and manpower required to rebuild the Chiss Ascendancy is far beyond what the Diarchy, or even the Galactic Alliance is capable of. On top of that...would my people even want to come back? I've seen about a dozen Chiss over my time traveling the galaxy; about three years. All except one had stooped to the level of mere scoundrels and smugglers. One was a captain for the Galactic Alliance. But they seem to have settled in. Found new homes."

 

[Iandre Athlea]

The fact that Zinayn didn't open himself to her gentle probe didn't bother Iandre at all. Some people preferred to keep these things private, while others allowed themselves to be open and transparent. She hoped maybe someday, he would open himself to her reading. Either way, she still did not doubt him. More likely, he hadn't even noticed, and that was fine with her. Perhaps she would ask him how to keep people out of her mind, which could give them another chance to bond. Then again, it might be better left unsaid. She would decide later.

As she spoke, the pain she felt lessened, and the distraction of their conversation took her mind away from it. It was still there, but it no longer threatened to overflow; instead, it became something of a simmer. He helped her far more than even she thought might happen.

"We had to keep things professional, for lack of a better way to put it. Life was very structured and orderly, at least when we were young. As we got older, you could have your Master. I lost mine before I went into that pod. I'm learning about that loss and the loss of my time. Were there really that many fallen Jedi?"

Iandre's knowledge was pretty limited, and much of the ancient past was unknown to her. While her speech had touched on her Master and her past, her sorrow did not flare up, remaining at a calm simmer. Nodding, she listened to Zinayn. What he said seemed to be something common. People moved on from their past and into new lives. She accepted she couldn't go back, but it was nice to have this chance meeting.

"What was your childhood like?"

Her legs were crossed, and her hands were placed on her knees. Wiggling her toes once again, she rested comfortably as they both meditated and just had a quiet moment of reflection together.

Zinayn

 

[Zinayn]

Zinayn's mind was still stuck on Csilla and the improbable mission to bring the Ascendancy back. It was a daydream. One that children might conjure up to make themselves feel better about their current situation. He knew that it would never happen, and as such it was a waste of time to think about. Instead he thought back to the few history lessons he was taught about the outside galaxy. He had learned about Grand Admiral Thrawn, the Empire, and the infamous Darth Vader. As he kept going back, he stopped on one subject. The Great Jedi Purge. The Chiss students hadn't learned much about it in class, but from the history book and some aid from the library on Naporar, he'd learned about the drastic change from the Republic to the Empire. And the sudden loss of the mystic vigilantes known as the Jedi. He knew what she was talking about, but he didn't have the information to help her.

"I don't know much about that time. We weren't taught about it in school. I'm sure Laphisto can tell you, but I just think there's no way that such skilled Force users could have been wiped out so easily. Even your Master perished? Do you know how? Was there a Sith legion?" Zinayn asked, unaware of the cause of the Purge and how it was carried out.

When Iandre Athlea inquired about his childhood, the Chiss paused for a moment. Was there really anything worth mentioning? "The Ascendancy discovered that I was a Force-sensitive at a young age, and, as usual, took me to become an ozyly-esehembo. Sky-walker, in Basic. We would navigate Chiss warships through the jumbled hyperlanes of the Chaos. Without us, the ships would need to use the jump-by-jump method, which was much slower. We didn't have such advanced navcomputers as the rest of the galaxy had. Which is why they used me and dozens of other children.

"I never saw duty on a ship though. War broke out, and many people were drafted, leaving the academy for teaching younger sky-walkers with minimal security. The security we had was in the obscure location of the place. So, I easily snuck out. I stole a ship and just...left. The Force guided me to Artesia for a while, where I lived off of scraps and, well, less ethical methods," he said, thinking back to his days of committing petty theft. "I spent a few years doing that before I knew I was wasting my life away. I was merely existing, fighting to survive. I didn't want to die just another street urchin. As soon as I realized this, the Force led me to Kashyyyk. For years I trained and even lived in the forest, under constant threat. That was how I honed my skill and power with the Force."

He cleared his throat and silently decided he'd been talking for too long. "So, Ian, did you and your master go on any particularly interesting missions? I'm not familiar with that time. Was there some sort of major threat around that needed the Jedi's 'peacekeeping' prowess?"

 

[Iandre Athlea]

"I have done a little research on what happened. We, the Jedi as a whole, did not see Emperor Palpatine for what he was. At the time, he was a senator from Naboo and then became Supreme Chancellor. He also played on the side of the Confederacy and the clankers. He guided and pulled the strings of the Grand Republic without us noticing what was going on. We trusted him and the clones we worked with. We were blind, arrogant, and stupid."

Zinayn asked if it was a Sith legion, and she shook her head.

"The Sith were a myth. The boogeyman that was used to frighten children. They weren't real. At least, that's what we thought. Then Order 66 happened. The clones turned on their Jedi and killed them. Some, like me, were able to either escape or be saved by going into hiding.

"Master Kenobi set a message at the Temple warning us to stay away. I sometimes wonder how many of us survived."

Listening to Zinayn recount his childhood, she couldn't help but smile slightly. It was bittersweet, and she had some sympathy for him. However, she knew he wasn't looking for that. If the truth were told, this was probably one of the first times Iandre had been able to sit and meditate for more than a few minutes.

"I remember going to Ryloth to help some farmers there. It wasn't entirely peacekeeping, but we did help mediate between the groups. Had a scuffle or two with the Confederacy but not in any of the big, grand battles."

She wasn't sure what he was asking for. So she gave him vague details, and she could supply more if he wanted.

"Do you remember your family? We were taken from ours when we were too young to remember them."

Zinayn

 

[Zinayn]

Zinayn closed his eyes as Iandre Athlea spoke about her past, vivid images jumping to mind. Clones, loyal without question, suddenly turning on their longtime comrades and gunning them down with no hesitation. And the emperor above it all, a puppetmaster with a wicked grin. Leading people to their deaths just to attain his power hungry goals. He was a tad shocked to learn that the Sith were not prevalent at her time, but it sort of made sense the more he thought about it. If there were not as many Sith, the Force would find a way to balance itself, as it always did. Eliminating a vast number of Jedi was necessary to ensure the scale wasn't tipped too far in one direction. From what he'd learned, the Jedi had been too proud to consider that they were wrong. And that lead to their destruction. He didn't like the death, but he knew it was necessary.

The flow of the conversation changed back to his life, and he pondered for a moment. He did remember his family, but he didn't really know them. "I lived with my mother and father until I was around eight years old. Then I was taken to the academy to begin training as a sky-walker in the Chiss navy. I was also taken from my family, as I didn't have a choice, but I wasn't as young as you were. In the Ascendancy, it is a great thing for your child to be taken to become a sky-walker. It is a very prestigious position, and many of the sky-walkers are then adopted by larger and more prominent families once they 'retire', or lose their Third Sight," he explained.

 

[Iandre Athlea]

As Iandre spoke, she had no idea she had filled his mind with visions of what happened. She would have been pleased that her words brought this into being if she had. Maybe it was because there were histories put down from her time, and Zinayn had watched them. Since she had so many questions since awakening, Iandre had also watched the histories. Thankfully, the betrayal of her clones and the murder of her master had not been recorded. At least, she hadn't discovered one yet.

"How does one lose their third sight? What is it?"

If it were force-related, she wouldn't know how one just loses that.

"Did you have any siblings? I've wondered what kind of family I would have had if my Force ability hadn't been discovered. I suppose the Jedi were my family, just a very restrictive one. It wasn't until I became older that I gained some freedom.

"Were you going to be adopted by another family?"

He hadn't seen a ship or been on duty as a sky-walker, and Iandre didn't know how his people did things. One of the reasons he had piqued her interest when they met at her rescue.

Zinayn