Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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Private Avoidance

Academy-1.png
WEARING: xxx
TAG: Irina Jesart Irina Jesart

Aerik had been avoiding everyone since his shift. The public nature of it had been embarrassing. He had known it would take place the next full moon, but the young pup, if he could even call himself that now, had not wanted to miss the festival on Jutrand. So many of the students from the academy were in attendance, and he had thought it would have been a great way to interact and get to know some of the others he had wanted to be friends with.

The little wolf had not given up on his hope that he could manage a friendship with the Echani twins. Something about them drew him, and while he could not place what it was, Aerik knew enough about the force he did not want to ignore it. Maybe he was overplaying his hand, but he did not know how else to be. Subtlety was not something he did well. That was Vyra’s gift. Were it not for Kole being even more forward, Aerik would be in stark contrast to his sister. As it was, he seemed to be in the middle of them both.

Tonight had come faster than he wanted it to. It was the new moon. He remembered the agreement he had made with a friend about meeting every month at the same time. There was part of him, a large part of him, that did not want to show up. He had done a decent job of avoiding her as well. Were it not for the fact the academy was a leadership academy, Aerik had even considered dropping out. Why stay when he could just apprentice with a Sith Lord and come into his own that way.

He sighed as his feet seemed to drag the rest of him to the maze. Aerik was careful, he was always careful when sneaking about, but this time a little less so. It was almost routine now. The guards did not break from their pattern or schedule.

The grass was cool against his back. Irina had not arrived yet, which was probably just as well. Aerik needed a moment to just look up at the sky on his own and just stare at the stars. Even his siblings had not been able to console whatever it was going through his mind. He knew they were next. Word would get out about them now, and the young wolf was not sure he was ready for the target it would put on all their backs. The assumption that others would see them as a threat was something he was working with.

Aerik closed his eyes. It made the world around him louder. He should have smiled when he heard her footsteps, but Aerik knew that avoiding her was going to make this meeting awkward. He stayed where he was and waited for her to sit down, or say something. Even if she wanted to yell at him for being an idiot, that was fine. The little wolf owed her an apology, and he knew it. He also needed to let her do or say what she was going to.

 
Irina didn't bother to step lightly, she knew it would make no difference to whether or not he heard her coming. Short of stopping her heartbeat and holding her breath, he would always hear her and that had been before he'd changed. She had no idea how things were now…she didn;teven know if she was wasting her time by coming here.

They had always been careful not to seem to close, to keep their friendship quiet. Any attachments no matter small could be easily exposed, but he had been actively avoiding her and not just the little time they did spend together, but it was like she suddenly no longer existed. On top of everything else that had happened it had cut her far deeper than she could have imagined.

When she reached the centre of the maze to find him lying there, she froze momentarily framed by the tall hedges that made up the maze walls. A mixture of emotions washed over her. Relief that he had showed up. Confusion as to why he would bother if he was so hellbent on avoiding her. All of it came to settle on anger, anger that he would be so cruel to her when he knew what she was going through.

Before she realised, she'd closed the gap between them and aimed a swift sharp kick for his ribs. "You complete and utter jerk!" she snapped.

Aerik Lechner Aerik Lechner
 
Academy-1.png
WEARING: xxx
TAG: Irina Jesart Irina Jesart

She chose anger. Aerik did not blame her. He had avoided her for the entirety of the last two weeks. The only thing which made it slightly fair was he had avoided everyone for the entirety of the last two weeks. The young wolf showed no favoritism or preference in who he ignored and did not ignore. He was still adjusting to what he was. Aerik was not a wolf, and he was not a demon. Aerik was some combination of what his father was and the thing which had kept his mother bound for a decade or more.

How was he supposed to deal with it?

She kicked him in the ribs. Aerik grabbed his side in pain, but did not say anything for a time.

“Yeah. I suppose I am.”

He looked at her and then turned back up to the stars. Aerik patted the grass next to him. What was she going to do, stay mad and leave. That was an option, but Aerik did not think she would do that. He was counting on the fact she needed a friend as much as he did at the moment. Just because he did not know what to say about what was going through his mind.

Aerik sighed.

“I’m sorry. Though… looking back, I should not have showed up to the party.”

 
For a moment, Irina didn't know whether she wanted to kick him again, the fact that he didn't even try to deny it, or even defend himself when he could have easily stopped the attack left the option feeling somewhat…pointless. And yet, that brief glance in her direction before he returned his gaze back to the stars served to infuriate her all over again.

Her mouth opened, a fresh tirade of insults ready to spew at him as she decided which part she was going to kick next. Then his apology came and it all died, sputtering out like a candle in the wind. Irina made a noise somewhere between a growl of frustration and a sigh and flopped down on the grass, crossing her legs beneath her as she looked down on her friend.

Her only friend. Maybe that's why it had stung so much.

"Probably not." she agreed "But your father was there. If you hadn't come…you would have been alone for your transition."

That was a thought that terrified her more than the sound and sensation of his bones cracking as she had half dragged him to find his father. "Why have you been avoiding me?"

Aerik Lechner Aerik Lechner
 
Academy-1.png
WEARING: xxx
TAG: Irina Jesart Irina Jesart

She was speechless for a moment. That was good. The young wolf seemed to disarm the anger with accepting he had been a terrible friend. Then came the truth he already knew. Aerik would have been alone for his transition, and that would have likely killed him. She did not say it, but the implication was there considering he had shared that bit of information with her the last time they sat under the moon.

“I’ve been avoiding everyone,” came the quick answer.

It was not fair, and a bit defensive, but it was also the truth. Did he really know why he had been avoiding everyone? To some degree he supposed he did, but for now it seemed mostly vanity. He sighed. It was not the answer he was looking for, so before she could verbally protest, he continued.

“I don’t know. I guess just processing, and I needed space. My father kept saying he was not sure if we would be more. He never expanded on it. Now, as it turns out, I am as much a wolf as I am the thing my mother was bound to. Something of it mixed in, and I really do not know what that means.”

He took his eyes off the stars and looked at his friend.

“It is very possible that I am more of a danger to you now, and until I gain full control. You’ll see me less.”

Aerik looked back to the stars.

“I have been practicing.”

 
Irina's expressions were normally well hidden behind her mask, but she had long since learned that with Aerik there was no real need for it, certainly not here anyway. They were alone and without prying eyes watching them. His defensive answer made her left eyebrow raise as the response 'I am not everyone was forming on her lips' he seemed to recognise his mistake and expanded.

She reached a reassuring hand out, settling it on his arm, the first time that she could recall initiating any form of contact that wasn't out of necessity since she'd tried to hold his hand, a memory she pushed very rapidly from her mind to make sure that her heartbeat remained as steady as it had been when she'd entered the clearing.

"Aerik… I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but whether I am in danger or not is not your call to make. It's mine. And quite frankly, I don't give a damn whether you're a purebred wolf or something more. You didn't hurt me at the full moon and I don't believe you'd hurt me now either."

She lifted her hand from his arm, jabbing him instead in the ribs where she'd kicked him.

"Stop playing the broody hero trying to protect a damsel, because I am not one."

Aerik Lechner Aerik Lechner
 

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