...And All the Other Colors

[Baalagor]

Music

It was something her Master had informed her of. A Sith had been brought to Voss injured and was immediately transported to the medical bay, where he had been healed by the staff on hand before being debriefed by none other than Connor himself. He had come to the jungle planet with intentions of abandoning the Sith, and had done so, turning his back on all that had corrupted him and making headway for a far different path, one bathed in the light rather than steeped in darkness. It would ultimately make for a better road to walk, one that would help rather than harm him, one that would hopefully enlighten him to the larger scope of life a galaxy beyond the Sith had to offer.

Unsurprisingly she had agreed to meet him once he was further rehabilitated, wanting to see this turncoat for herself and perhaps grow to understand him in a manner that pervaded much deeper than his former allegiances. Until that time had come she had gone about business as usual, having looked over the saber that had formerly belonged to him known as The Bleeding Cross, meditating on the darkness stored within its core and the lives that super-heated crimson plasma had inevitably ended. It was an effort most wouldn't have deigned to undergo, but she believed in growing to entirely understand one's enemy, even if they didn't fit under that label as they once had.

The simple presence of a darksider, former or no, on the grounds had caused a wave of restlessness among those housed within the Temple, but it had slowly settled as he had oriented himself and made a proper decision as far as where he would continue on after the first step had been taken. Syala had wished to be a part of that journey, and he hadn't denied her, seeming to welcome in some sense the chance to convene with a Jedi. Hopefully the experience would bring the both of them a further knowledge of both the light and the dark, and she could only hope that he would find his own niche within the Sanctum in time, and choose to make his home with them.

It was in the gardens she awaited this [member="Krux Mullarus"], having whittled her time away wandering the grounds in a sort of semi-meditative state, seeming to breathe the ethereal itself into her lungs as sustenance, utilizing the Force as an intrinsic part of her being. He would be arriving shortly, or so she had been informed, and she navigated towards a suitable clearing, seating herself cross-legged on the grass, milky white, unseeing irises open to look upon a breathtaking natural beauty they would nevermore be able to take in. However, she didn't require physical sight to perceive an individual for who they truly were. Mullarus' simple presence would speak far more than words or appearances ever could.

 

[Krux Mullarus]

It had been about twenty-four hours for the most popular attraction at the Voss Academy to finally start to feel a bit less nervous about just walking out in the open. The hood and mask he wore to conceal his face, still tainted with Dark Side corruption, helped to drive curious eyes away, but drew some even closer.

From the moment Krux had awoken on Voss, there was a certain woman his new master had reccomended he meet. One [member="Syala Daivik"], of whom he never really went into detail about. At this point, anything could help. The Academy was, however, starting to feel cramped and time seemed to go by too slowly here. It was like the galaxy was purposely slowing time for Krux to get acquainted with the positive energies and the Jedi, of whom he was starting to learn were not the disturbingly-emotionless, ascetic monks the Sith made them out to be. In fact, most Jedi were proving to be far more...human than the Sith. While the Jedi were humans, the Sith were starting to look more like monsters.

And Krux still could not tear himself from that one monster he still saw in his dreams that drove his aching heart crazy.

The white-robed, masked Jedi stepped out into the garden. Like her, he didn't need mortal eyes to see. He was experienced with Force Sight, which was likely what she used to 'see', and he had no doubt his aura was unlike any on the Academy grounds. He saw her standing near the opposite end he was at, the pair of indigo eyes beneath his mask watching curiously as the Voss wind blew his comfortable, blanket-like robes and hood around.

Mullarus took quiet steps toward the woman, her soft-colored brown hair flowing in the breeze as well. It was quite serene. Voss. It was nothing like the dread-filled, torchlit corridors of Glee Anselm's Sith Academy he was used to. Or the walls of Korriban's Academy, which seemed to radiate doom and destruction all day. Voss was...calm. Peaceful.

Now only about fifteen feet behind her, Krux's eyes observed the exotic flora around him. The Force caressed every petal and leaf like a mother touching the face of her child. Like a lover's kiss on their lover's cheek.

Like Setzi's lips...her soft lips...

And just like that, Krux felt his heart begin to speed up. He sighed, almost frustrated at how infatuated he still was with the woman who abandoned him for a monsterous Sith Lord who expresses desire for the destruction of humanity. He felt anger swell up within him again, remeniscing on the moment he stood before the togruta Sith Lord in the ruins of his old manor's courtyard and feeling nothing but the desire to make the monster suffer...

I became a puppet of the Dark Side. It is another reason I am here...

Finally, he decided to speak to the woman. He had a feeling she could feel the conflict within him just as clearly as Connor did. A man with a broken heart who took his anger out on the entire galaxy. So much death. So much regret. So much...longing and desire for things to return to how he felt theh should be.

"You must be the seer Connor told me about" he said, his voice slightly muffled and metallic from behind his scratched, dented, damaged mask. Scarred and almost broken. Just like the man it shields.

 

[Baalagor]

The instant he entered the gardens and made headway towards her Syala was acutely aware of his presence and the nuances within it that separated and yet melded him with the same Jedi Order he had the intention of joining. Not once did she make a move to break the silence as he strode towards her, allowing him to continue at his own pace. During those few moment of serene quiet she took the time to truly study his aura, noting the still present conflict within him that manifested as pulsating pockets of darkness scattered about a beacon of the light doing what it could to push past that and shine through for all to see. At the same time he wasn't entirely certain of his place here, and a part of him still wanted to leave. In time, however, he would grow to look at it all differently.

A smile just as gentle as the wind brushing across the clearing turned up the corners of her mouth once he spoke. So Connor had told him about her, as she had grown to expect. It was only fair, she supposed, as she knew of him in turn. "I am. My name is Syala Daivik." She turned her head to look at him, or where she perceived him to be, the scarred flesh about her eyes and the milky white irises blatantly marking her as sightless. In a certain light she saw deeper than most via the ethereal, able to peer into the very fabric of one's being and all that was held within their core. It certainly didn't make her omniscient or omnipotent in the least, but it gave her something of an edge.

With a sort of purposefulness she walked up to him, unflinchingly looking upwards to where his eyes would be if he wasn't currently disguising his features. "You don't need the mask with me." Though it didn't make much of a difference physically, as she was unable to perceive neither it nor his true face should he choose to reveal it. "You don't need it because I can see through to here," Assuming she was unimpeded, her hand would reach up to gently rest over his heart for nothing more than a few seconds, "I can see who you really are, Mullarus. I can see who and what you want to be. And that isn't someone or something you need to hide from the galaxy, least of all yourself. Only through acceptance will you ever truly be free."

Seeming satisfied with all that had been said she began to walk, her pace leisurely, motioning for him to follow. In some ways the new arrival reminded her already of her Master, but in others he was a whole new breed entirely, one she wished to get to know and understand, and perhaps form some sort of bond with along the way. Friendship was no doubt an odd word for any that had been affiliated with the Sith, but she wanted to help him realize how powerful of a driving force it could truly be. There was much she hoped to instill in him, but that would come later. The pair had only just met, and a sort of understanding needed to be bridged before anything more could be done. But she had always been the patient sort.

"I want you to know that I wasn't informed of anything else other than your name and previous affiliation. Anything else you reveal about yourself to me I want to be of your own volition." It was what was fair and just, two things she always stood by. "You don't need to worry yourself with hiding things about your past in fear of what others will think. I can assure you there is no judgment here, least of all from me. I only want to understand and perhaps get to know you better, and figure out who the man is behind the mask and the robes and the drive to be better. Who we were, who we are and who we aspire to be are three very different things. And you need to determine what each one of them means to you."

[member="Krux Mullarus"]

 

[Krux Mullarus]

When a pair of empty eyes glanced back at him as she turned around, he cocked a brow. A blind seeress. The Jedi sure are the philosophical kind... Such a waste, Krux thought. He always had a fascination with eyes. They were the mirrors of the soul. This woman may have had a pair of beautiful blue jewels once upon a time. Just as she became curious to know about him, now he felt a desire to learn about her.

She had a point when she mentioned how he didn't need the mask. They were alone in the garden and she couldn't see his scarred face anyway. Emotional scars she could see without a doubt, he couldn't hide those. Chances are she could feel everything about him without even having to ask. His broken heart was not easy to hide.

So for the first time since he left the medical bay with Connor, he reached around and unhooked the bands of his mask behind his head and removed it, letting the white hood fall to his shoulders as well. Krux Mullarus' scarred face, not only physical scars, but scars of Dark Side corruption, showed themselves to the garden.

Mullarus did flinch a bit as the seeress' hand touched his chest. The hairs on his neck stood on end and his heart immediately began to beat faster. Instantly, he thought of the gentle hands of his old lover, Setzi, stroking his chest in the night as she slept beside him. It caused a frown to form on his face. She was trapped in the mind of a monster forged by Darth Pyrrhus, crying out for help, but with only a whisper.

I can free you, Setzi...I know I can...

He didn't remove Syala's hand, though. He knew she could help him. He didn't know how, but she could. Connor said so, and at this point, Connor was one person he felt he could trust. He gave him the second chance he didnt deserve.

He walked with the blind seeress, his eyes wandering around the garden as he listened to her lecturing words. "I...understand. Thank you for this opportunity, Syala. It's comforting to know you cannot judge based on appearance. Surely, if you could see my face and the eyes I have which have seen too much destruction, you would think of me as a monster like many other Jedi already do.

"Er...not that im happy you have no sight. I'm sure you had very pleasent eyes once upon a time. I-if you don't mind me asking, how did you lose your sight?"

[member="Syala Daivik"]

 

[Baalagor]

"If one judges solely based on appearances they limit themselves to only one form of sight, making them the blindest of us all." Some may have viewed that as a profound statement from one so young, but Syala only spoke freely from both head and heart, putting a voice to her thoughts carefully but never bothered to once gloss over or dance around her true opinions. That only wasted time, and despite being more than the philosophical sort she enjoyed getting to the crux of the matter when it so suited her. "I don't need physical sight to perceive you, because the way I view the world allows me to look past whatever guard you may be putting up. You're mistaken in assuming your torment is written only on your face. It resides deeper than that. But it doesn't have to hold you back."

His was a troubled soul, but it did genuinely bring her happiness when he chose to abide by her words and removed the mask. That was some sign of trust, though perhaps he was at ease only because she wouldn't know his face. One's aura, however, was much more difficult to hide. "There isn't a need to thank me. I'm only doing what's natural. You deserve a chance, as does every other being in the galaxy. Nothing about who you were or what you may have done makes you different from those other individuals. Redemption is a very powerful thing. And you are not beyond it. There is a light within you that wants to be free, if you'll only let it. Just like you, it needs a chance to flourish."

All of this was beginning to look more like a lecture than she would have liked, but she simply held a wealth of words within her that were always looking for some way to escape. Connor had always said she talked too much, and it seemed he was right. "Stop." He was doubting himself, and just as she always did with her Master, she wouldn't allow his self-deprecation to continue. "You aren't a monster. A monster wouldn't have come here seeking another chance at life, and they most certainly wouldn't have complied so readily to the terms offered them and accompanied me on this walk no less. No, a monster wouldn't have given the Jedi so much as a thought. But you did. So you aren't a monster."

The corners of her mouth tightened as he inquired after how she had come to lose her sight, and a flash of memories returned that caused the muscles of her jaw to tic visibly beneath the skin. "On Belgaroth, in the Scrapyard." It wasn't difficult to recall every detail when that marked the last moment she had been able to physically take in her surroundings. "I was on a peacekeeping mission with a Padawan when the Sith attacked. I confronted one of their Lords, Sage Bane. He blinded me with his arm that had been replaced by Vong amphistaves." In contrast to before there was a sort of hardened undertone to her voice, though it wasn't directed at him in the slightest.

Those traces of bitterness melted away slowly but surely, and in moments her demeanor returned to its previously gentle and compassionate state, though something that hinted at a capable warrior beneath was present that hadn't been before. "I would be lying entirely if I said I don't wish to strike back at him somehow. But I realize that my duty to everyone here both as a Jedi, a mentor and a friend comes before anything else. However, even those as supposedly serene as us Jedi aren't immune to emotion. It's what makes us all sentient beings. Just as I shouldn't suppress mine, neither should you yours."

[member="Krux Mullarus"]

 

[Krux Mullarus]

Sage Bane...

A Sith Lord - A Hand of the Dark Lord - one Mullarus had worked with before. Now, as he stood here staring at the face of this gentle, compassionate woman who was blinded by that man...he didn't feel convinced he was no monster. He fought with those bastards, the Sith, and he was part of the crew who toppled the Republic and plunged the Galaxy into one of Sith-dominance. No, Mullarus still looked upon himself the same, but he wouldn't debate it with Syala. That was something best kept to himself.

"I can imagine every single Sith I ever met in my time serving the Empire wanting a stab back at me for being a turncoat...I sense I will face the Hand of the Dark Lord one day. I've already become a mortal enemy to one of the many Voices...why stop there?" he asked himself. It sounded like a joke, but it was likely he was right. Even that witch Azurea likely sought to destroy Krux and keep the real half of her buried beneath six feet of filth. Filth called the Dark Side, which tore him and his love apart.

What really surprised him was the last thing Syala said. She sounded like Connor, too. Jedi with feelings. How many other lies had the Sith fed him? Jedi weren't supposed to have emotions. Emotions are dangerous, as Krux clearly proved to himself. It was true that he couldnt fight them away forever, he still longed to be with his lover again and feel her presence once more. More than anything else, except perhaps if it meant going back to the Sith...that would be asking too much.

With defeat and regret in his deep voice, Krux said, "So it's true. Jedi aren't all just...faceless...unfeeling servants to the Republic. The Jedi Code is wrong. Jedi can be people, too..." He sighed, looking down at the grass. Now he couldn't get her out of his head again. Setzi. Constantly, she tormented him. He would see her trapped in a cage in the middle of Hell with the witch Azurea holding the key to the door that kept her locked away. Every night, this image haunted his nightmares. Every night, visions of Setzi Lunelle haunted his dreams until eventually, the innocent farm girl from AgriCorp on Aduba would be whisked out of his arms and thrown into a cage, trapped by the two monsters whose demonic laughter he could never forget.

Jedi should never seek revenge...but with all of this talk of emotion just being something we can't avoid...maybe I should...

[member="Syala Daivik"]

 

[Baalagor]

For a short while Syala allowed him time to mull over that revelation and consider what it meant for him and his future within the Jedi. It would be a defining factor for one that had been taught to despise everything she and those like her stood for in the galaxy. And she didn't begrudge him in the least for his lack of understanding. None of them would. "The Silver Jedi don't serve the Republic. We are separate from them, but both Orders commonly work towards the same goal. You'll find friends there just as you will here, in time." Certainly not immediately, and perhaps not even within months, but bonds would form regardless. How he reacted to them would determine what number of those relationships would remain.

"The Jedi aren't just capable of being people, we are. We experience life in much the same capacity as most other individuals, and you'll find that we often react to it similarly as well. But it's what we do with these reactions that separates us. Regulation and understanding is key." Those were two things that most often exaggerated immensely when it came to their methods, especially those that opposed the Order entirely. "It would be wholly foolish of us to attempt to suppress all emotion. People aren't machines. Every one of us is meant to feel. And that's what gives a Jedi their ultimate compassion. They are at peace with their thoughts and feelings and they turn that outwards to others."

The Code was another thing altogether, though so intrinsically woven into the path of a Jedi that it was often nearly impossible to discern one from the other. "No, the Jedi Code isn't wrong. Merely misinterpreted. There have been so many that speak ill of it that the true meaning is often lost. It's not something you can truly understand simply by reciting the mantra to yourself or reading of it in the archives." It took far, far more than that. Nothing was ever quite so simple. "You must meditate on those words, and determine what they mean to you personally. Because the Code has billions of meanings, each of them made by the particular Jedi that abides by it. The answer lies inside of you."

A flash of malice radiated from his form, and nearly instinctively she extended a calming aura outwards, one that would hopefully soothe all thoughts of vengeance, at the very least momentarily. "Peace, Mullarus." Words that were a command and a request wrapped up in one. Slowly she lowered herself into a sitting position, situating herself so that she sat cross-legged in the grass, motioning for him to do the same across from her. "Something is troubling you." It was proclaimed as a statement of fact rather than an inquiry, as the both of them knew she could sense it. "I would like you to tell me what that something is." That, of course, was entirely his own choice. But she hoped he would confide in her.

[member="Krux Mullarus"]

 

[Krux Mullarus]

Was it a good idea to say so? He couldn't have been the first Jedi to have this kind of problem. Would it matter? Mullarus sat down in the grass across from her with a sigh, staring down at the ground. He waited for a few moments, then finally spoke.

"She's the reason I ever left the Sith and turned away from the Dark Side. She confided herself to me after saying that her old lover, our old master, was cruel and she didn't want him raising her child. I fell in love with her. We fell in love. She was...the greatest thing that ever happened to me." Krux's heart pounded in his chest as he spoke of her, feeling anger welling up as he continued, "But...something happened, and she went back to him. Everything she ever said to me and everything she said about him...lies. There is good in her, I saw it...many times. It is beautiful about her. But she remains on our old master's leash under her Sith name. His lusty playtoy obsessed with the Dark Side...and him." He lowered his head, holding his forehead stressfully, "He's a manipulative pig who taught her everything wrong and just wanted to sleep with her! He doesn't give a damn about the Sith Code, he just wants her! And I couldn't stop him!"

He stopped and took a deep breath, his face morphing painfully, "He almost killed me. Only then did I realize what the Dark Side had done to me. Only then...when it was too late...did I want it gone. I want to be done with the Dark Side forever. I murdered thousands of people and almost myself with it. It's too dangerous to control. But...more than anything...I just...I want her...I want her to see the Light again and leave his terrible, evil clutches...I want her to be happy, not live in agony and regret like she does with the Sith. I know she does. She told me. She had thoughts of coming back here for her sister. Now...all I want is to make that wish come true for her. I...I love her. I may never stop." Krux admitted the last part almost shamefully. The entire monologue sounded like he was ashamed of himself.

[member="Syala Daivik"]

 

[Baalagor]

Instead of attempting to soothe or otherwise dissuade him Syala merely let him have his tirade, understanding the importance of outbursts such as this in the ultimate healing process. Only through grasping his own pain would Mullarus ever truly be able to leave it behind, and it was that she hoped to help him accomplish. Once he was finished speaking she remained decidedly silent, granting him time to collect both his thoughts and breath and herself a moment to consider the circumstances he had been placed under and what the best way to approach the mess this all amounted to was. This marked the first real task she was confronted with that truly suited her as a Consular, and she wanted to do what was best for him.

"Love is a very, very powerful thing, Mullarus. You must understand this if you're so willing to act on those feelings." At her young age, and being raised among the Jedi no less, she was all but a stranger to the sort of attraction he was referring to, but she loved her Master like a brother and a number of the other Jedi were nothing short of family. "It isn't wrong to feel so strongly for another. It's a beautiful thing, and far from something to be ashamed of. But, like everything else, it requires moderation. You can't jump headfirst into a conflict without any forethought because of it. There comes a time when your own personal safety and well-being must be taken into account above all else. The greatest act of love is accepting and loving yourself first. It seems, to me, that that would be a wise first step for you to take." The both of them were perfectly aware of his own self-loathing.

It was plain this was a subject that touched on many a nerve, but she would help him work through it all with a calm and rational mind, viewing his feelings objectively rather than personally for the moment. "You understand better than anyone what the Dark Side is capable of, having experienced it yourself. It corrupts one's view of the galaxy, themselves and others. What she may have before seen as cruel may now be appealing, and there's no doubt she views the Jedi as those that must be stopped much in the same way we see the Sith in return. Like love, it's an intoxicant, though of a very different and noxious sort. It's not something to be underestimated in the least."

She had tangled with it herself a few times, though never on a level as deep as his own. "I believe that she can be redeemed from the darkness. Most anyone can, so long as they are willing. However, it won't be nearly as simple or easy as you would no doubt like, and it won't be achieved by you rushing in headfirst with no prior planning or thought. If she has been corrupted as deeply as you've described, you first have to bring out the person you described to me before, the one that wanted an escape from the evil she suddenly found herself surrounded with. But, once again, that won't happen overnight. Find yourself first, then find her. Only then will the both of you be able to locate each other."

Falling silent for a few seconds, she leaned forward to rest a hand gently on his knee, a gesture meant to be soothing and perhaps offer a sense of solidarity. "No matter what you may think, you aren't alone in this. Everyone here is willing to help you, if you'll just let them."

[member="Krux Mullarus"]

 

[Krux Mullarus]

Find yourself first...then her.

It made perfect sense. Maybe that was why she ever left him in the first place. Even as a Sith, he placed himself at such a low importance without thinking of how others might be genuinely concerned about him. Of course, that wasn't really what Syala meant by 'Find yourself'. Mullarus needed his confidence back. That was probably one thing Setzi loved about him. If she looked at him and saw how depressingly dull and how much he despised himself after becoming a Jedi, well, she wouldn't want to walk with him to the Light, would she? He had to get his act together and show her how much the Jedi have improved him and how the Dark Side held him back. Her confession to him on Ragoon about defecting in the first place helped. He already felt a bit confident he could do it.

Krux nodded to Syala, "I understand. I know she wants this, even if she won't admit it out loud. She wants to be with her sister, who is lost somewhere on Voss. I know she is afraid of the agony the Dark Side brings her. I think she just needs to see how much better her life would be if she turned away from it like I did...so I have to show her.

"But you are right. I have to center myself before I think about her." That would be the hard part. Mullarus' confidence took a huge hit recently. It wouldn't be easy to get it back.

To show her he was paying attention and ready, he pat her hand on his knee, "I will take all of the help you and the Jedi will give me. I want to save her. But I will save myself first. However...one question for you. You're very young." She looked about fourteen or fifteen to him. She sounded young, but when she spoke, she had the wisdom of a Jedi Master. "How do you know so much? Did losing your physical eyesighy enlighten you to the secrets of the Force?"

Honestly, Krux knew little of the Light. He wouldn't be surprised if that was how it worked.

[member="Syala Daivik"]

 

[Baalagor]

Not quite managing to stifle a quiet laugh that truly betrayed her young age in its fluttering and lighthearted amusement, Syala shook her head. "That's not entirely how it works, no. I wouldn't say that being blinded hasn't opened me up to the true beauty of the Force, but it isn't the true reason that I'm so enlightened, as you put it." There wasn't an easy way to explain why and how she knew all she did, but just for the simple reason of his having asked she would do her best to rationalize it for him. "I've always been wise beyond my years, or so my Master has always been fond of telling me. I'm not certain if I entirely believe him, though I've settled for other explanations." Always she had been the humble sort, and nothing would change that.

"For as long as I can remember, I've had a fine attunement to the Force. I've been able to perceive sporadic visions of the future since I was twelve, and I've never gained much of a control over it since then. It's something I've determined to be instinctual rather than intentional on my part, and a manifestation of my latent sensitivity to the Force. It's the ability that brought me to my Master - Connor - and what has brought me so far as a Jedi at such a young age. I wouldn't say it makes me extraordinarily wise or knowledgeable. I'm only speaking honestly." Her attitude wasn't a search for praise and had never been. It was simply her existence and the way she went about her life, nothing more and nothing less.

Seeming to take into consideration where she stood within the Order she let those words sink in for a few moments, unsure if she had answered his question or explained too much in the process. "I suppose, having been Knighted at such a young age, I am something of an oddity among the Jedi. But I only wish what's best for the Order and those within it. And that includes you now, as well." He was a part of that family, and in some ways a member of the inner circle of those she personally dubbed family and friend. "I'm certain you'll find your own niche here with us, just as I have. It will take time, but you'll grow to think of Voss and the Temple here as home." Or perhaps he already did.

"What is it you wish to save when you speak of yourself, Mullarus? Which part of you do you see as needing redemption?" In their discussion previously she had already gotten something of an idea of how he viewed himself in comparison with the rest of the galaxy and the Jedi that now surrounded him, but she hoped he had learned through this short period of time that self-acceptance wasn't as difficult or challenging as he made it out to be. This was one of the very first steps taken, to be sure, but it would also have one of the largest impacts on his future within the Silver Sanctum. "You've already become more powerful than you were before simply by admitting your faults. But now you have to find it within yourself to mend those that require it."

[member="Krux Mullarus"]

 

[Krux Mullarus]

Krux nodded along with her lecture, looking down at his legs every now and then as if he were thinking. So it seemed to the Ex-Sith that they were not the only Order to double up on students per master. It seemed Connor had this young seeress as a Padawan, as well. Strange. Connor never really struck Krux as the seer type. All of this hypothetical, philosophical knowledge Syala was passing on must have been...natural. Connor always seemed more of the warrior type. A Jedi Guardian. He had never asked him if he was one to focus on such training, but that was how his master came across to Krux.

"We share a master. I had no idea. You said you're a Jedi Knight already? I've been researching the ranks of the Jedi. It's about the same as the Sith, from what i've seen, only...I have a question." he said, remembering to last night when he scrolled through some holocrons about the history of the Jedi and came across a special way Jedi Padawans obtain the rank of Jedi Knight.

"What exactly are the 'Jedi Trials'? All I know is that it is a series of tests Padawans take to prove to their masters that they are ready to become Knights. I obtained the rank of Sith Knight when I was...a member of the Empire, but I never really took any formal tests. My old master just told me I was ready one day and...suddenly, I had more authority. How different is it here? I feel that taking these tests will help me to center myself..."

[member="Syala Daivik"]

Spoiler

Sorry, I must have forgotten to make a reply

 

[Baalagor]

Spoiler

No worries! ^_^

A slow smile turned up the corners of her mouth once he mentioned being trained by Connor as well. "I'm certain you'll learn much and more from him. He might put himself down, but I wouldn't believe all of that negativity. He's a great Jedi and friend. And like you, he's much more than he makes himself out to be." There were similarities Syala could already draw between the two of them, and she only hoped that having one so close to him in situation and mindset would help ease both of their consciences. "Don't be afraid to go to him with anything. He might seem intimidating at first, but I've seen nearly every side of him, and I can assure you that beneath that rough exterior is someone very caring and kind."

Her lips pursed as she considered his inquiry. Of course she had read of and learned plenty about the Trials, but her personal experience with them was limited. "The Trials aren't necessarily a requirement for one to reach the rank of Knight. While I'm sure some Masters still require their Padawans to undergo them in order to prove their readiness, they aren't mandatory as they once were." In every essence they were a relic of the Jedi from the Republic, but as with every other tradition she held a healthy respect for it. "As you said, they are akin to a series of tests a student undergoes in order to progress through the Order. But they aren't quite as clear-cut as that, and they aren't simply something one decides to do in order to center themselves. A Master or Knight must make that decision."

Seeming to think for a moment, she continued once her thoughts had been sufficiently collected. "Traditionally, there are five Jedi Trials one must undertake. the Trial of Skill, the Trial of Courage, the Trial of the Spirit, the Trial of Flesh, and lastly, the Trial of Insight. Each one of them helps to cover one facet of being a Jedi. The Trial of Skill is set up to primarily to test one's abilities in lightsaber combat, but looking through to the core of things it focuses on self-discipline above all else. The Trial of Courage is nearly exactly what it sounds like, with a dangerous mission being undertaken either in reality or through a simulation in order to prove one's bravery in the face of danger.

"The Trial of Spirit is far less materialistic than the previous two, and focuses on combating one's own inner darkness, pushing past all that we fear the most about ourselves, assisting in self-discovery and understanding. While that sort of meditation has the potential to be dangerous, it can also be life-changing. The Trial of Flesh was, traditionally, much more threatening to one's safety than the state it has now been altered to. Originally, bloodshed was required in some form, often that of dismemberment. This Trial focuses on overcoming great hardship, pain or loss. The Council sees being separated from one's Master as a fair enough difficulty." Taking a breath, she centered herself, allowing him time to absorb this new information.

"Finally, the Trial of Insight requires one to see through illusion and into the true persona of an individual, regardless of their perceived nature or affiliation. Discerning falsity from truth is one of a Jedi's greatest assets." She paused, as if watching him for a moment. "It's what allows me to see the light that resides within you."

[member="Krux Mullarus"]

 

[Krux Mullarus]

Krux stared at her, listening attentively as she explained the Trials to him. Whether or not Connor would use them as a test for him, Krux would test himself with them. It was somewhat humorous to him of how many he would have passed as a Sith, even. His grandfather was a masterful illusionist, so that would have crossed off the Trial of Insight. Nubica would have helped him pass his Trial of the Flesh on Balmorra, after losing his first lightsaber along with a couple of fingers and being imprisoned on New Alderaan for a few days, being lectured by many Jedi and spat upon by soldiers and the like. The Trial of Spirit could have been passed recently, with Krux turning away from the Dark Side completely. Krux could count how many adventures he had been on that would have had him pass the Trial of Courage, and lastly, the Trial of Skill was passed tenfold for how many dangerous foes he had bested in his time. He chuckled softly, Maybe i'm already a Jedi Knight.

He didn't say it aloud, of course. He'd have to be tested again, for sure. "Thank you, Syala. I'm lucky to have met someone as wise as you. Truely."

[member="Syala Daivik"]