Lysander von Ascania
,I know that I haven't written to you in quite some time. What words I have cannot express how sorry I am, but permit me to try anyway.
I wear your ring always. It is a beautiful piece; you could be a fine artisan if you so wish. It reminds me that the distance between us is not as small and quiet as it seems.
I hope that you are doing well, truly. It is one of the small comforts to me that you were not on Ukatis during the rebellion. My other comfort is Makko Vyres ; we married privately several weeks before the insurrection.
I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. Perhaps, even before, so that you could share in our joy as I know you would have wanted. The ceremony was small. Just us. I couldn't bring myself to do anything even remotely similar to the pomp of my first wedding.
Forgive my rambling. There aren't enough hours in the day to do what needs to be done, so it has become difficult to find the time to write. I've composed a hundred letters to you in my head, but the words sit just out of reach every time I try and write. This is my first and final draft of my letter to you. I've only ever shown you what I wanted you to see me as; calm and unbothered. Unshakable. It felt necessary, given how strongly I wanted to shield you from the uglier aspects of our childhood.
From our father, too.
I know that you worry for me. I think you deserve to see me as I am. I don't know.
You've doubtlessly heard the news by now, but I wanted you to hear it from me, too. The Sith invaded our home. They did not bring fleets or stormtroopers, but used our own people as their soldiers. I will admit that the people's dissatisfaction for King Cholmondeley was not manufactured. It was real, and the Sith preyed on it, using darker aspects of the Force to fashion their discontent into a weapon. They did not care for Ukatis or her people, only to strike a blow to the Alliance and send a message to the worlds under her banner.
They burned our fields and released a potent toxin through the capital. Soldiers and civilians alike succumbed to a violent madness. Families ripped each other apart in the streets, in their own homes. The architect of this attack was a contemptible creature who calls himself Darth Nefaron .
You might've heard of father's death. You may have heard that it was I who slayed him. Both are true.
That vile Sith even had the gall to record such a thing and distribute it. Please do not look for the footage. I've come across it accidentally once or twice and it fills me with a pain so sinister each time.
He poisoned our father's mind, twisted it into something repulsive. A man may rebel against his King, but to hold a blade to his own wife's neck?
Know that I tried. Words did not work. When I saw him holding our mother hostage, I had to make a choice. I chose our mother. I chose Ukatis.
I am sorry that I took our father from you.
A Sith assassin took the King's life. The coward could not bring themselves to do the honorable thing and face the man in combat. Such is the way of the Sith. I pray that you do not cross paths with such ilk, but if you do, I have faith that you will do what is right.
Ukatis will rebuild, but it must also change.
I've convinced the upper court to reconvene the Council of Lords, which was disbanded before even I was born. This is a start; it will give representatives from each province a seat at the table, rather than only those in good graces with the King. Next will be reorganizing the flow of tax credits from the poorer territories and distribution of aid from the crown. The purpose of a ruling class is to care for those under their jurisdiction. That purpose will be restored.
Do you remember Fabian Albinac? A distant cousin of ours. In a few weeks, he will become King. He is a good man, and I have high hopes for his ability to be a fair and decent monarch.
Perhaps I am involving myself beyond what is appropriate for a Jedi. For a Ukatian noblewoman. But if I can help guide Ukatis toward a brighter future, then perhaps Ashla will forgive my sins.
Some of the Lords share my vision. Some look at me in disgust. Others in fear. But always, only ever if my back is turned. It is typical for the family of a traitor to be exiled, imprisoned, or put to death. My part in ending the rebellion and shameless advocacy for Ukatis' future has kept our line from further scrutiny. Publicly, at least.
I hope that you are eating well. I hope that wherever you are, you have good friends by your side, people who you can depend on while we're so far away from one another.
Mother would like it if you visited. Father was laid to rest at the estate. I have not yet visited his grave, but perhaps you would like to. If you do, let me know. I'll join you. I'll be here for a while.
With All My Love,
Coco
< I . II >
