Recovery was slow, at first. Aerik had remembered nothing of what happened on Brosi after he’d been wounded and the beast took over. All he remembered was waking up to the feeling of grass beneath his fur and the artificial sun lamps warming his back. It was unreal, and yet, he felt like he was on Stewjon and all was right with the world.
The pup scratched at the new scar. It itched. The wound had cauterized when he changed, but it was still fresh. The skin around it had still burned and needed to heal. New skin always seemed to itch, is was that shedding of the dead cells which tried to cling longer than they ought
Aerik didn’t know, nor did he care. He was safe, sane, and whole. Still, his mind did wander toward his pack. Had they all made it out safely? Were they alive? Had they won?
They must have if the pup was on his father’s ship, right?
His eyes closed as sleep took him. He would heal faster this way. The wolf with black fur and the demon with smoke and molten eyes rested. He could remain this way until Dromund Kaas demands he leave.
After taking some time to recover herself after the battle on Brosi, and ensure that Irina was going to live, Skadi made haste to find the only individual she hadn’t heard anything about since the events that had led to Irina’s injury and Skadi’s Force exhaustion.
Aerik Lechner.
She knew where he was, but his condition had remained a mystery to her. She found her way to the biodome, a sort of enclosure that was safe for the likes of Gerwald and Aerik - they who could shift from their human forms into that of wolves. Nothing could halt or dissuade her from getting through and inside the biodome as she was propelled by something deep in her chest that she was still trying to understand or make sense of.
Quietly, Skadi made her approach. Before her was the black wolf, inky fur warming beneath sun lamps, with grass underneath his belly to act as a sort of bed. The creature, the being, in front of her was majestic though the memory of what he had shifted into on Brosi was still raw and fresh in her mind. She didn’t exactly feel fear, but a healthy dose of caution, of wariness. And mixed in there somewhere was awe and a feeling that was more…primal.
Slowly, the Valkyri drew closer, then lowered herself down on the grass, well within eyesight of the black wolf, of Aerik. She was quiet, content to simply exist with him in the moment, and let whatever happened next, speak for itself.
His head lifted at the sound of Skadi’s movement. It would make sense the wolf could hear such things. They had a lot to talk about and pressing into her mind was out of the question. Aerik stood to his full height and bore his fiery face into the young woman’s golden eyes for a moment before turning and walking into the cover of the nearby thicket. He emerged human, and fully clothed, tying the drawstring at his waist closed.
“That was a big secret I was hiding,” he stated without apology. “When you mentioned how your clan revered the wolf, I didn’t want what I am to change how you looked at me.”
She was quiet for a moment as she watched him reappear, back in human form and clothed, and say without apology the fact that he had been hiding this secret from her.
Why?
Because he didn’t want her to change how she looked at him.
She remained quiet, her eyes averted from his, as she let his words settle over her mind and into her heart. His concern had been valid; had she known of this secret before this point in time, it certainly would have changed how she saw him, how she felt about him. But now?
Skadi lifted her eyes back to his face - now marked with a still healing scar. Memories of how that scar had come to be, and all that had happened afterwards, flashed through her mind for a brief moment.
“It does not change how I see you…it only deepens what I feel for you. Yes - I will not deny the fact that there is a level of reverence in how I, and my family, view the wulf. That…does carry over a little bit towards you - but not in the way you might think. It…”
Skadi fell silent, clear frustration rising up in her eyes as she tried to find the best way to say what was on her heart at that moment. She was torn though - torn with how she felt, and the knowledge that Aerik had another woman in his life. And the fact that she still didn’t know her place anymore. If there had even been one to begin with. But she took a leap of great courage, and said what was on her heart anyway.
“Ah feth it. Aerik…even before this truth came out, I felt a connection to you. With you. It is why I hold so dear to my heart when you said I was part of your pack. I feel like…I found a piece of myself in you. That has not changed, even with knowing that you carry the wulf inside you. You are still Aerik to me, my comrade, my…” she trailed off, falling silent, unable to finish her train of thought.
She rambled slightly. Aerik just smiled because the essence of it was that she did not see him differently. He was still Aerik, still her commrade. He was still…
“Your what,” he asked gently with a hint of curiosity. “After Brosi… what happened in my apartment… no more secrets huh?”
A hint of color rushed into her cheeks. “My packmate. My wulf.” There - she said it, and she could hardly look him in the face. She didn’t know why. “No more secrets. I-I think I can manage that. So long as you do not keep secrets from me anymore. Ja?"
Her words caught him off guard. Aerik opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came, so he closed it again. A breath passed, followed by another. Several seconds of silence sat between them before Aerik just nodded.
“No secrets,” he agreed before reaching for the scar on his jaw. It hurt. “Your wolf? That explains the scene in my apartment. You two were fighting because of me?”
“Irina - I think was. I defended myself. I did not know her connection or relation to you. But I do not blame her for what she did or how she acted. I would have too, had I been in her place. And yes…my wulf. But now that I know that there is history between you and Irina…I can back off. If that is what you wish. I do not want to come between you two and whatever it is you have going on.”
It would hurt her, but she was willing to do so - if it was something he chose or wanted. She had never been in this position before in her life, and truthfully - she didn’t quite know what to do now.
He nodded again. Aerik was beginning to understand everything that had happened. Did it matter now? He loved Irina, he knew that much. She was his best friend. Skadi was his partner, and it would be a lie to say he didn’t find her attractive. Both women were attractive, but Aerik feared what he was. What if he hurt them? What if he lost control?
“Back off? Why? You haven’t done anything wrong. Rin didn’t really do anything wrong. I’d rather know what you both feel than for something like that to get between us because I didn’t know, or am to dense to see it.”
He chuckled.
“We all know I’m dense.”
Skadi smiled when he chuckled with his own statement; he was pretty dense, but that just meant that she - and Irina - would have to be blunt and upfront with him about things. Now that she had become more aware of him, and safe with his presence, she felt that she could be more upfront. It would certainly help him, or so she felt anyway.
“Aerik - I will be blunt. You have two women who are interested in you. I certainly am, and Irina certainly is. I want you, and so does she. I care about you, and so does she. But you have a history with her. You have known her longer, you have formed a closer bond with her than with me - eh, I assume anyway.” Skadi paused and sighed, looking down at her hands. “I-I have been trying to woo you since I first saw you on Korriban. But now I do not know what to do…because Irina is a part of you too. If she wants you all to herself, then it would be wrong of me to keep chasing after you. That is why I said I would back off.” Skadi looked back up into Aerik’s face, searching his eyes. “Do you understand a little better now?”
“I understand.”
His scar itched, and his heart raced. Skadi was his partner. Rin was his best friend. Aerik closed his eyes, and when he opened them the fire behind them seemed to burn on a serious resolve.
“You and Irina are my pack, but what you’re saying, backing off… I lost Rin for five years. I’ve had to leave my brother and sister. I’ve been alone, and I do not want to be anymore. What if… I need you both? What if…”
He stopped talking. Aerik didn’t really know what he was going to say, so there was nothing to say. What could he say?
Skadi inhaled a breath and collected her thoughts. She hadn’t imagined she would be talking about this when she walked into the biodome. She didn’t really know where it had all come from but it was too late to take any of it back. Not that she would want to, but she sometimes spoke…too soon.
“What I was trying to say is that I would stop trying to woo you if you asked me to, not that I would stop being your packmate. I will always be your packmate, for as long as you want me there with you. If you want both Irina and I there with you, then I am more than happy to be there. Loyalty to one’s pack is something I take seriously, remember? The question is if…Irina would tolerate me being there with you, too. But maybe that is something for her and I to figure out together.”
“She wouldn’t try to kill you again?”
Aerik laughed, but he did not remember how Brosi ended. If he had, the question wouldn’t have been necessary, or funny.
Skadi was quiet for a moment with his question, unsure of what to say next - but well aware that the longer she was silent on the matter, the more he would question. She wasn’t sure if he remembered what happened or not, and something was telling her that she needed to tread carefully here.
“I…do feel that some of the heat she had towards me was alleviated somewhat after the discussion in your apartment. Besides, she could try to kill me again if she wanted.” she offered a smirk, the familiar gleam in her eyes. “I will not really know until I can speak to her face to face. She will not kill me anyway - she knows now that I mean something to you. And to kill me would be to destroy whatever is between the two of you. She would not risk that.”
“She wouldn’t, no. Her intentions are quite clear. Yours are now too. Clearly I truly am dense. But right now I don’t want to think about my life without either of you, even if it means not choosing… or wanting something extremely selfish.”
His eyes looked back to the thicket.
No secrets.
“I heal faster in my other form. I can’t believe I wasn’t fast enough to block her.”
Skadi watched him in silence for a moment, her mind awhirl with thoughts and memories. “Well - I will say this. In my culture, my Clan at least, it is not uncommon for a man to have more than one woman with him as his mates. My Father does.” she said with a shrug. “So, it does not…bother me, to think about sharing you with another. But my clan’s traditions are not embraced by everyone else. Irina may abhor the idea. Either way, I am not going anywhere.”
Even if she had to accept not sharing her heart with him - not the way she wanted to. But that decision wasn’t being made right now. In truth, it rested upon Irina - and Aerik, to a degree. He needed to speak to her, and Skadi needed to have a frank discussion with the other woman.
“Do not blame yourself for your wound; our foe did something that neither of us were expecting, I think. The fact that we are both still alive, after that - speaks to our ability to fight together and look out for one another.” She smirked again, a devious shine in her eyes now. “I think the scar makes you look even more handsome. The mark of a warrior, tested by battle. You wear it well.”
A brief pause, as she glanced out at the forested area around them; “I can leave, and let you shift and heal and rest, if you wish.”
Her father had multiple… Aerik said nothing. That was certainly not something he expected to hear, nor a conversation he was ready to have. Anything with either of them would bring up the one question he was afraid to k is the answer to. What if he couldn’t control the demon part of his nature?
“Stay or go, that’s up to you, but I need to shift.”
Aerik did not wait. He returned to the thicket where the sound of popping bones announced his change.
Skadi watched Aerik retreat towards the brush, and she made the decision to stay. He had said he didn’t want to be alone anymore, afterall. And he was her packmate. What better way to show that she wasn’t going anywhere, and wasn’t afraid of him in his wolf form, then by staying? So she found a patch of grass not too far away from where she had originally found him resting, and she laid back against the grass, folding her arms over her belly and crossing her legs down at her ankles, a tuft of long grass acting as a pillow for her head. Nearby, she heard the sounds of his transformation, and though her pulse spiked with the recent memory of what had happened - she pushed her uncertainty aside. She knew this time was different; he wasn’t being hurt, he wasn’t being propelled by anger. This place was peaceful, quiet, enough so that it lulled her into a light sleep - even before Aerik had reemerged. A quiet show of the trust between packmates.
