Star Wars Roleplay: Chaos

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The Darkstaff - Revelation's Trumpet

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OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION

  • Intent: To follow up with The Slave's pursuit of what was mentioned in not only Bestria's holocrons, but also numerous rumors and leads followed upon over the course of a few months.
  • Image Source: Here
  • Canon Link: Here
  • Restricted Missions:
    The Cold Wind Blows, where The Slave meets Velok the Younger in search of his father's staff. In doing so, they come to a deal where Velok will supply him with the remaining shard, and where to find those who can help him create it.

[*]Primary Source: Darkstaff
This is a Canon Item

PRODUCTION INFORMATION
TECHNICAL SPECIFICATIONS
  • Classification: Artifact
  • Size: Handheld
  • Length: 1.22m
  • Width: N/A
  • Height: N/A
  • Weight: 3.63kg
SPECIAL FEATURES
  • Sentient
  • Feeds Off The Force
    Feeds On Force Essence And Force Artifacts

[*]Strengthens As It Feeds
[*]Resistant to Force Powers / Energy Damage, but weak to light side powers.
[*]Lightsaber Resistant
[*]Can Possess Individuals And Creatures
[*]Can Alter Physical Reality Around It
[*]Creates a Disturbance In The Force
Strengths:
  • The Sin of Gluttony -​
    ​With an appetite for destruction, and the infinite carnage that comes with it; the Staff is able to consume all that comes in its path. With a favorite meal being the force sensitives and essences of those who wish nothing more than to live their regular lives, there is almost nothing that is not considered the perfect dinner for this abomination of a creation. Most often, entire fields of carcasses are left in its ravenous wake, forever staining her trail in the blood of the innocent and unsuspecting. Over time, this hunger creates a great power in the device; a slow build to an eventual revelation.

    Despite this however, even it must discharge its built up prowess. Because this reincarnation of the original device is not made of all the pieces, it can not hold even close to as much energy as its predecessor, but a notable amount in itself. While still a behemoth, every action it takes takes away from its power, and it has a cap to be set; a cap that while nigh unreachable by the standard practitioner is still nothing unheard of.

[*]​The Jedi Exorcist -
  • ​The Staff is not only sin incarnate, but the Devil made manifest. In this, it finds yet another grueling strength in the very essence of domination; possession of one's body and soul. Able to project its dark and twisted dreams through the speaker of another body, the staff subjugates the lesser willed to little more than the pawn that they are; effectively creating one of the most abhorrent and cruelest infringements on sovereign rights of any living being in the galaxy, with none of the morality to care.

    Still, while able to dominate the lesser willed and non sentient with ease, this too can come with limitations. First, the number of people it can possess is entirely reliant on the bearers own skill in the force, and ability to magnify their energy; effectively putting the weight of such an ability on the bearer in the majority. This doesn't mean the staff doesn't take much of the brunt, considering just what the result is; but it is majority dependent on how able the the wielder is.


    When in terms of sentient's, the control is also varied depending on the overall willpower of who it is exactly taking control of. While completely grueling to resist, those with skill in the force or are naturally resistant to such mind powers, are able to resist the ability, depending on the situation. The acolytes and knights may find a harder time preventing its control compared to a master, but even a master would find trouble holding off its intimidating advances into their mind. In truth, this is once more dependent on the user and their own ability; however there is the note that the more people that are taken under control at once the easier to fight off the ability it is, and even then it is not absolute. Resisting the mind control may be excruciating, but is possible when in reference to the absolute worst things one's psyche might try to contend with.

[*]Dementophobia, or Theophobia? -
  • ​When in the presence of the beast, meek men shall falter to their knees and praise their new lord. Quiet ramblings, the subtle hints of madness, all signs that those who have witnessed her glory have fallen at her feet. The Darkstaff is a weapon so capable in its inferno of unbridled power, so destructive in its mere stillness, that those who bear witness to its greatness risk falling to the uncontrollable depths of pure dementia. To lose ones sanity to the greatest of creations is to fall to something great, in the most uncouth way.

[*]On The 7th Day -
  • ​In truth, the greatest strength the Darkstaff may posses is its incarnate ability to change what is around it. From the ground one walks on, to the mountains they climb, to even the very beasts they meander past; those who wield its beautiful persona become God when he created creation itself. To edit, to change the natural order of things in a matter of seconds, to spit in the face of the artisan himself, is to sin in the highest regard; and to do so with such a wicked atrocity makes one forever damned in the eyes of the all seeing galaxy.

    In truth, even the simplest creation one could manifest with the staff could nearly dwarf the natural order of an entire planet; easily upsetting the balance of ecosystems fortified over millions of years. Manifesting the imagination in a moments notice at the strain of the user, or using it to amplify the users ability to alter at a far slower pace, this can effectively be used to become god when creating anything that lives and breathes. Challenging creation in its very own game, it is the absolute worst transgression to meet the eyes of god.

    Still, her artistic strokes are not instant; delayed in turn by the size of the change intended. While unable to instantly transition an entire planet in a moments notice; far smaller things can be done in a blink of an eye should the focus be there.

Weaknesses:
  • The Sentience of Man -
    ​As the morality of man is fickle and thin, so to is the Darkstaff's; as she is Man personified, the sin they have festered for eternity brought to physical manifestation through the dark incantations of the lowest being. With a mind of its own, she too has become fickle and condescending, a malignant energy that feeds on the suffering of those around it, able to choose its master on its very whim. In truth, the staff seeks nothing more than to end the lives of almost anything it comes across, effectively making its user a solemn beast; given only the presence of the dead raised again, and the staff for endless conversation.

    With this, The Staff too comes with the quirks and dangers of even a regular being. With deceit in its nonexistent heart, and a hunger that forces it to feed in an infinite cycle of gluttony, she often allows all those around her to feed into the lies she gives off. Appeasing to the sin in men's hearts, she is the incarnation of the darkest places in humanities heart; a disgusting reflection of what lies in every creation of the force.


    Yet, even the most abhorrent of personalities finds itself weak to a single thing, Love. Although abusive, disgusting, and cruel, the Darkstaff becomes almost obsessive with its owner. Not in the traditional caring sense, but one of survival and manipulation; something it fails to see as any different in truth. Despite this, it still wishes the death of almost all sentient beings around the galaxy, believing itself the true Judge, Jury, and Execution of the Galaxy's filth with little more than the legs to traverse its slums. For the Strong to make the decisions, and the weak to fall to nothing more than slaves; it refuse to respect anything but the most stalwart bearer.

    And in this, the slow and grueling death of the bearer comes to light. Her all consuming nature begins to corrupt the bearer, destroying their personality and devouring their soul. In short order, they'll soon find what they once loved turned to dust, what made them laugh made little more than singed embers laid waste to in the grand scheme of all that is important.

[*]For The Kind, Find Strength -
  • ​While the weak, the forever desolated of all mortal men's populaces are subject to its will and consumption, those who are able to sacrifice their lives out of the love, the very compassion and goodness that holds itself in all men's hearts, she is unable to feast. The very presence of the light, the yin to its yang, creates a disgust in its presence. This extends far past its simply feasting as well.

    In truth, the light is the creations greatest weakness; able to cancel nearly all of its prowess when in the presence of equally strong forces. Perhaps a single master could prevent its endless strength, but an artifact of the light would negate her strength greatly, even able to silence her very voice. With nothing left but a meager whisper that barely reaches the ears of its wearer, The Staff is forever subjected to a life of avoidance, to hide in the shadows from those that overpower her with nothing more than their very presence and virtuous heart.


    Those who master the light, can even become immune to the grand incarnation of sin through little more than slight concentration. With mindset made calm, those who witness its bearer and this malignant flag can ignore her enigmatic calls and forsaken temptations; letting her fall to the wayside as the goodhearted hero lay waste to its empire of darkness. This is her greatest weakness, the final nail in a long overdue coffin that should have been closed and buried eons previous.

    This too applies for the objects of the universe that contrast her darkness in equal strength. Being able to mitigate its darkness, to even outright silencing her in her entirety through the light is achievable if not difficult to achieve.

[*]The Cost of Potency
  • ​Perhaps one of the greatest dangers of wielding such powers, is being subject to her fickle nature. While the endless capacity can tempt even the strongest of wielders, even they become nothing more than a leaf floating in the abysmal breeze that she offers; forever a meaningless victim to her random whim. From her gifts, to her horrible torturous punishments.

    When one bearer finds themselves on the bad side of her dangerous edges, they become the victim of her wraith. While this can range from their sudden death, to even a quick imprisonment into the void of space, perhaps the most subtle and painful punishments is the off chance the insane creation simply decides its user is no longer able to use the force. Destroy their connection, and its bearer becomes nothing more than a vessel for the negligence that she is, tasked with being the legs of the god. Nothing more than the nails that hold up the most grand painting to ever grace this side of hell, it would seem.


    With this same train of thought, the user is no more a means to an end for her; and with it comes the need for energy. Utilizing the strength of the broken staff requires the user to amplify their own strength through it, feeding their very essence into its jaws to create a swath of destruction behind them. In truth, while this may be powerful for some time, those who overexert themselves or lay to her outrageous demands can see themselves the same as if they were on her bad side. Forever an empty husk that walks her about, giving up their soul to the devil that straps itself to their back.

    She is no mistress to have, and those who do will find pain forever.

[*]The Grandest Presence -
  • When bore to the world, the Darkstaff is too prideful to be hidden away. In its mere presence the very fabric of reality is subject to distortions and changes, a chaotic churn that allows all those in the area to feel her presence. Perhaps a show put on for attention, if not a passive byproduct of its endless reserves, but something so forceful in its dealings that all those in a system wide area could simply tell where its malignant energy originated. To all those who can see, it would be a clear challenge, if not an invitation to bear witness to its decedent incarnation.

[*]​A Limited Reach -
  • As all things with their founding of power in the force, so too is the Darkstaff susceptible to the wicked and fickle ways of the force. Should it not exist, or should the force not appear in an area; then the staff is no more than a paper weight. Stuck within its wretched soul, the turbulent thoughts of an untold demon cry for release only to be met with an abysmal silence; a darkness that never offers more than a quiet disregard for its unholy wishes.

DESCRIPTION

The Darkstaff is by far one of the most potent, abhorrent creations to grace the dark side of the force. In its endless years of corruption, consumption, and endless destruction, it has amassed an almost endless supply of power and metaphysical wealth. Able to know, understand, even create and change the very laws of nature, she is every darkness put into this galaxy in the palm of ones hand; yet even with all this prowess she is only a mere fraction of her original prowess, subjected to the whims of the great heroes of old that sent her latent pieces into black holes and shattered even longer before.

Yet this is at the end of her story, and she traces back many millennia before any of today's dealings. Made by an unknown father in the farthest reaches of the galaxy, from its very inception it was regret in the minds of those who witnessed it, perhaps being an accident that turned into the greatest abomination to ever traverse the cosmos. Even still, before it was allowed to run, it began with a mere few steps; in this it killed its original creator, subjecting them to the horrors of its first massacre. Now, no longer virgin to murder it lay dormant for years before being found and recovered an unknown amount of owners before ending up with the Sith Empire of old.

When found, it was not utilized, instead considered far too potent and traitorous to ever be considered a viable weapon against their enemies, no matter the promises of power she offered as whispers in the back of their blackened minds. Put into a now ancient space station known simply as the Arcanum, it became a prisoner to the careful scholars who cared for this prison of malignant powers. To be put into isolation, forever lost to the joys of manipulation and communication, it was destined to a life of dormancy from the outside world.

However, when a Sith Lord named Lord Tagriss laid siege to the facility for powers like the staff on the behalf of his horrid masters. Relieving the Darkstaff from its reliquary, Tagriss fled from the station to his master's sanctum, letting the other prisoners and soldiers he brought become a cloud of dissipating live to be used as a means of slowing down his less than cowardly pursuers. Even still, those who chased him eventually found where the abhorrent creation was taken, and inturn raided the sanctum themselves.

Yet, through enigmatic means, the staff disappeared shortly after. Lost to the annals of time, the staff simply lay void in history until it was found by a nameless trader who's name too found a grave in recesses of man's attention. However, although he may not be remembered, his actions became of great renown, as he was the first step in a long series of a run that would end with the life of an entire civilization.

It was her the Staff came into the possession of the species known as the Oblee. Studied by their greatest minds, it became their favored prophet of power, yet the staff itself had something else in mind. In its manipulation, its cruel manifestation created a massive shadow creature that fed off the literal fears the people of the planet held in their hearts. It became their greatest danger, their greatest fear in every waking moment of their miserable lives. With the Staff's presence, it became a danger to their way of life, and in turn the people of Oblis turned to its cancerous advice as the only truth they could understand.

Creating a weapon to destroy the creature from the dark mentions of the abysmal prophet, the Oblis fell to her cruel manipulations. Although some considered its advice to be against their greater interests, those who dissented were outcast and the final nails were planted into the coffin of their culture. Absorbing those fears, those hopes and dreams, the Darkstaff manifested their energy in the most destructive manifestation that it could.

Those who sought the staffs favor were instantly obliterated, made into beings who lurked in the darkness the sinful creation had made. Their planet fared no better, as it too was instantly destroyed in a matter of seconds; yet another result of its immaculate advice. Once more, the Staff was put into hiding amongst the planets rubble; forever to be guarded by the once grand people who trusted its creation wholeheartedly.

And yet, even this was not to be. Despite the attempts of nearly every owner thus far to hide away its endlessly apocalyptic energy, another would come forth and fall victim once more. A story with no end, forever repeating like the tail of Sinbad the great; sin after sin after sin, the torturous and endless cycle of absolute ignorance.

Eventually, a man known simply as Darth Rivan became the staff's next owner. Yet, even he quickly began to understand just how torturous the thing could be, and he too chose to destroy it. Though that was his goal, it too failed when the staff let its somewhat master fall into its own black hole creation, transporting him to his grave many years in the future.

Here, it was given to the next series of owners; The Jedi Order. Studied under the safety of its own light sided artifact, many assertions were made in their scholarly pursuits before it was locked away once more under the protection of many of their greatest warriors. Still, despite the precautions taken to keep the creation safe, it was lost once more only to be rediscovered by the greedy nature of criminal dissidents.

Although much of the history becomes shrouded in mystery, the truth was that the original staff was eventually destroyed by the selfless sacrifice of a nameless hero many years after its rediscovery. For almost a millennia, its darkness would lack a graceful entrance into the galactic plane, allowing once more the galaxy to understand and come to terms with balance and peace. This, their greatest chance at a future, was given to them by a single man who was forgot by all the people they ended up saving.

That is, until its subsequent recreation under the guiding eyes of a man known simply as The Slave, Velok The Younger, and Cerita Sarova, a woman simply known as Cerbera. Under the corrupted and nigh ignorant guidance of the triumvirate that calls forth a near Armageddon, they bring back a staff that was subject to the grave under a number of times. Now, brought back to the forefront of reality, it begins yet another chance at its end goal of power of everything.

Only time will tell how many lives it will take this time.



THIS WILL NOT BE USED IN PVP UNLESS ALL SIDES CONSENT TO ITS USE.
THIS IS NOT MEANT TO BE A WEAPON, ONLY A NARRATIVE DEVICE.
ADDITIONALLY, WHILE WRITTEN AS A GODLIKE ENTITY, THIS IS NOT AS POWERFUL AS THE DESCRIPTIONS MAY IMPLY.
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
<p>Hello, I'll be the factory judge reviewing your submission. If you have questions, please feel free to respond to this thread once we are underway.</p>
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
[member="The Slave"]

Before I even get to the meat of this submission – and there's a lot to chew on – there's a major problem we run in.
This is a canon item. Therefore, it follows canon item rules:
  1. To be able to claim A Unique Canon Item, a writer must first complete a "Unique Canon item objective" in a convincing manner that adds to the quality of the role-play thread. Each completed objective only counts for one submission.
If you've completed the requested thread, please provide me with a link, as well as add it under the Restricted Missions field.
In the event that you haven't done it yet, you'll have to write the item objective thread before I can start judging this.

@mention me with edits or questions.
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
[member="The Slave"]

Hear you had some issues posting in the thread, but I hope it's been resolved?

Anyhow, I see you've added the dev threads. I'll review them and get back to you with the first verdict. We can work from there. :)
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
[member="The Slave"]

Alrighty, read the two threads. First one is awesome and relevant. The second one isn't, so you can remove it from the sub.

Now, moving on to the good stuff, I'mma do this with a dichotomous key approach.
  1. You will use, or potentially use, this submission in a PvP environment:
    Do another, relevant item objective thread. (E.g. you recreate the staff, research it, etc.) Know that even then, the submission as it stands won't pass. There will be nerfing involved.
  2. Stick to just this one thread. Darkstaff will undergo severe nerfing procedures.

[*]You will never, ever, under any circumstances use this in a PvP environment. You're submitting this solely as an easily accessible compendium of its powers, abilities, and characteristics. It will only ever be used in threads where ALL writers agree to its use, and are fully informed of its capabilities. If this submission is ever used in a thread where everyone didn't agree to it, this gets yanked and archived without a second thought.
  1. Even if you choose this option, we'll be nerfing this thing. The OG Darkstaff in any shape or form is absolutely too overpowered for Chaos.


@mention me with your choices and thoughts.
 
Netherworld said:
You will never, ever, under any circumstances use this in a PvP environment. You're submitting this solely as an easily accessible compendium of its powers, abilities, and characteristics. It will only ever be used in threads where ALL writers agree to its use, and are fully informed of its capabilities. If this submission is ever used in a thread where everyone didn't agree to it, this gets yanked and archived without a second thought.
I'm going to go with this option. In truth, I realize how overpowered the weapon itself is, and I simply wouldn't enjoy utilizing it in such situations. I'm also alright with it being nerfed, so long as it is within reason. I can rationalize that simply because the staff isn't being made with its full body; only a large portion of it.

I'll also remove the second thread, and we can move on from there.

@Netherworld
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
[member="The Slave"]



The Slave said:
Beam Me Up, Staffy - ​With its outrageous amount of power, comes the basis for a force dedicated version of teleportation. While many have theorized it around the galaxy, and some fringe science groups have even done so, the Staff takes aside all doubts and work put into the subject and simply does. While often considered impossible, the beast that she is can simply teleport not only itself, but too the user who bears it. In turn, it creates a monolithic emblem of power for all those who are witness to its glorious potency.
  • This by far the most OP thing on the list. Please remove it.
Additionally, most of these aren't mentioned under the Strengths/Weaknesses, or are described entirely too vaguely for comfort.:


The Slave said:
Interferes With Concentration
Can Cause Insanity
Can Prevent Force Heal
Can Imbue The User With Battlelords Strengths
Can Not Be Disarmed
Can Create a Cloak of Shadows
Especially Dangerous Around Dark Side Nexii
Can Create Force Storms
Can Alter Physical Reality Around It
Creates a Disturbance In The Force
  • In light of everything that's already listed, this is just... over the top. Decimate this laundry list of powers, please.



The Slave said:
The Sentience of Man -
  • Not sure what the weakness here is. Reads more like a strength, in truth, will all that 'obsessed/in love with its owner' business.
  • Rework this to be clearer in exactly what kind of weakness it represents, or replace it with something that's an actual weakness.


The Slave said:
​The Cost of Potency
  • I know you said you were going to use this strictly for story purposes, but again, this weakness feels empty. As the owner of the Darkstaff, it's entirely up to you to RP getting on 'her' bad side and getting punished for it. It also feels very similar to the first weakness, just reworded from a different perspective.
  • Give me something more solid.

Tl;DR this sub has a truckload of strengths, only some of them listed, and not nearly enough good weaknesses to balance it out.
Cut down on the powers, and give me more solid stuff in the weakness section. My main suggestion would be to limit the frequency and breadth of its use by having it draw on the user's Force reserves with each 'casting'. Because as it reads right now, whoever was wielding this could basically spam any and all of its power list however they pleased, ad infinitum.

I'd also ask you to cut back on the language of the "omnipotent" sort. Yeah, this is powerful, but 100% immunities, insta-death, etc. are not gonna get passed through Factory.

@mention me with edits or questions.
 
Netherworld said:
In light of everything that's already listed, this is just... over the top. Decimate this laundry list of powers, please.
Done and done. The process of listing it was simply to remain true to the canon work, but removing the excess is fine by me. Especially considering half of those were aesthetic based. However, there were two you asked to be removed which I did not; that being the 'Creates a Disturbance in the Force' and 'Can Alter Physical Reality Around It', that being both mentioned in the strengths and weaknesses already listed. When in a system, being able to be found from any direction is a notable weakness, mentioned with the first of the two, and the alteration is mentioned in strengths (in truths its primary purpose to me) as far as the latter.



Netherworld said:
Not sure what the weakness here is. Reads more like a strength, in truth, will all that 'obsessed/in love with its owner' business.
In truth, the 'In love with owner' isn't anything more than the way I wrote it. If its not clear enough, let me assist; it is to bring to light just how sentient and fickle the device is. While it may not seem like a weakness since you have to put faith into the writer as to how it might be done, the truth comes in the majority of weaknesses on almost any submission. In this case, The Staff has no interest in its owner besides caring for it as a car; something to traverse the land in its most basic fashion. That is where it ends, and past that the Staff will manipulate and change the owner, perpetually corrupting them into its own malignant toy than anything more.

It destroy the personality, if not the very fabric of their being, when held. It kills in a slow fashion, rather than a quick one in this situation.



Netherworld said:
Give me something more solid.
In this one, I'll do just that. I'll change the matter to be derived from the essence of the user, and magnified through the staff rather than the staff itself just doing what it may. Should someone overexert themselves, the Staff will consume their presence in the force and create a walking husk of who they were before; effectively enhancing its own power and leaving the user forever stuck being its chauffeur.

As far as cutting back the language it was written with, I apologize. Its not often I get to enjoy myself with a familiar sense of writing, and although it may seem 'end all be all', it is by no means meant to be. I simply have a tendency to write things like this sounding far more over powered than they are, and in this case I know its not doing me any favors. I apologize in advance, but I'm unsure if I'll be able to cut down on it (regardless of my intention) simply because I would no longer enjoy having the artifact written under my name,. if that makes sense.

[member="Netherworld"]
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
The Slave said:
Can Possess Individuals And Creatures
  • What are the scope and limitations of this power?
  • How many people at once can it posses?
  • How powerful do they need to be that it can't do so, or has difficulties doing so?
  • How absolute is this "possession"? Would they throw themselves off a cliff without a second thought?


The Slave said:
Immune to Force Powers / Energy Damage
  • The complete immunity has to go. Give this some exceptions (usually it's Force Lightning or the like).


The Slave said:
Can Create Sithspawn
  • This is a bit vague at the moment. How does it work?


The Slave said:
requires the user to amplify their own strength through it
  • Did you mean something like "channel" here, as opposed to "amplify"? The latter means to increase something in volume or power, which would be the exact opposite of what this Weakness does.


The Slave said:
It destroy the personality, if not the very fabric of their being, when held. It kills in a slow fashion, rather than a quick one in this situation.
  • Please add this clarification to the description.


The Slave said:
As far as cutting back the language it was written with, I apologize. Its not often I get to enjoy myself with a familiar sense of writing, and although it may seem 'end all be all', it is by no means meant to be. I simply have a tendency to write things like this sounding far more over powered than they are, and in this case I know its not doing me any favors. I apologize in advance, but I'm unsure if I'll be able to cut down on it (regardless of my intention) simply because I would no longer enjoy having the artifact written under my name,. if that makes sense.
  • I understand, and I'm not trying to be a killjoy here. When you're writing your stories you're free to describe it as you like, but this is, at the end of the day, a Factory submission.
  • I posit a compromise – put another disclaimer below the PvP one you already have, stating something to the effect of your explanation above. She's not overpowered, she's just written that way. :p

Finally, if you could please add a line in the OOC information category, stating that this is a canon item.
 
Netherworld said:
What are the scope and limitations of this power?
Added this to the strength that was more in reference to it.



Netherworld said:
This is a bit vague at the moment. How does it work?
Also added. In short, it is primarily just a narrative way to expand on already established alchemy practices, but can be made to create a sithspawn in front of someone should they put that effort in; albeit costing them much of their energy and focus.



Netherworld said:
Did you mean something like "channel" here, as opposed to "amplify"? The latter means to increase something in volume or power, which would be the exact opposite of what this Weakness does.
In truth, I meant it as amplify. That being that the darkstaff is obviously meant overall to increase someone's prowess, but it is just that, and amplification. Despite what its able to do, should someone overexert themselves, they'll fall victim to the weaknesses mentioned. This might be more the semantics of it all however.



Netherworld said:
Please add this clarification to the description.
Added.



Netherworld said:
I posit a compromise – put another disclaimer below the PvP one you already have, stating something to the effect of your explanation above. She's not overpowered, she's just written that way.
Added. :)



Netherworld said:
Finally, if you could please add a line in the OOC information category, stating that this is a canon item.
Also added!

[member="Netherworld"]
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
[member="The Slave"]



Netherworld said:
The Slave, on 27 Jun 2017 - 09:15 AM, said: Immune to Force Powers / Energy Damage The complete immunity has to go. Give this some exceptions (usually it's Force Lightning or the like).
  • Please complete this edit as requested.
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
[member="The Slave"]



The Slave said:
Immune to Force Powers / Energy Damage, albeit light side powers.
  • Remove the immunity bit, please. The wording is also very unclear – albeit light side powers... what?
  • Fix this, and we should be good to go.
 

Netherworld

Well-Known Member
Very well. We have reached the end of our joint journey, [member="The Slave"] – you are free to leave here with the Darkstaff.

You have my tentative approval. Should you be found using the Darkstaff against, with, or on someone who did not give their explicit consent, it will be confiscated immediately.

Don't make me regret this.
 
@Netherworld @The Slave

The Slave said:
ADDITIONALLY, WHILE WRITTEN AS A GODLIKE ENTITY, THIS IS NOT AS POWERFUL AS THE DESCRIPTIONS MAY IMPLY.
If this is not as powerful as the description may imply, then please edit it accordingly.

As it stands, this will not pass approval as the Darkstaff is an immensely powerful weapon. We are talking about an item that had been previously destroyed in canon and in chaos timeline. While the rules dictate that a person may weave a story how they like to find the item, the end result still needs to be processed through factory for approval for balance and fairplay.

Tone this down please to the qualities you believe are what you want to enhance the most.
 
Cira said:
If this is not as powerful as the description may imply, then please edit it accordingly.
In truth, this was more in the manner of how I wrote it. If nothing else, I have a knack for the extravagant, and in this falls well into those boundaries; that being exactly what I meant. While I realize that the artifact has been destroyed twice, and there (as understood) only a single shard of it remained resulting it in it obviously losing much of its potency, you may have to clarify to me just what you might want changed.

As it stands and how I understand it, I already did cut almost everything from what the original post was that was not essential to what I wanted to utilize the device for. That being the only two real remaining strengths that mean anything are 'Alters reality', essentially just the force as many others already use it (sith alchemy, sith spawn, telekinesis, et cetera), and can possess people; the latter being a completely negligible thing since it'd break most of the ground rules of god modding in relation to anyone.

That being said, I'm still willing to alter it to your liking, but at this point I'm unsure just what you want changed.

[member="Cira"]
 
The strengths in this Darkstaff are more than just "altering reality" and possessing people. [member="The Slave"] [member="Netherworld"]

Let's go through all your strengths and weaknesses.



The Slave said:
The Sin of Gluttony -​ ​With an appetite for destruction, and the infinite carnage that comes with it; the Staff is able to consume all that comes in its path. With a favorite meal being the force sensitives and essences of those who wish nothing more than to live their regular lives, there is almost nothing that is not considered the perfect dinner for this abomination of a creation. Most often, entire fields of carcasses are left in its ravenous wake, forever staining her trail in the blood of the innocent and unsuspecting.
This makes no sense. What exactly does this mean the staff can do?



The Slave said:
​Breathless Incarnation - ​As a defensive measure, the Staff is able to remove any sense of the Force in a small area around it. When done, this can create anything from mild headaches to full spasms in those who are subjected to it; almost as if the entirety of their being is left sundered by the mere presence of the abhorrent creation. In truth, this is simply a matter of being near the masterpiece, only supplemented by a coy transgression that is its defensive matrix.
So the staff can remove any sense of the Force in an area round it --- so if it does that then how does it work itself?




The Slave said:
​The Jedi Exorcist - ​The Staff is not only sin incarnate, but the Devil made manifest. In this, it finds yet another grueling strength in the very essence of domination; possession of one's body and soul. Able to project its dark and twisted dreams through the speaker of another body, the staff subjugates the lesser willed to little more than the pawn that they are; effectively creating one of the most abhorrent and cruelest infringements on sovereign rights of any living being in the galaxy, with none of the morality to care.
1) The staff can possess an individual
2) The staff can create and project dark manifestations through dreams by controlling another body. So you can basically extend the use and power of this staff by controlling someone else.




The Slave said:
Night of the Living Dread - ​Additionally, the near omnipotent staff is able to break one of the most fundamental rules of the laws of nature; able to make manifest a synthetic life from the long deceased, the dead rise once more when the staff so wishes to do so. Corpses so disgusting, so malignant to the very balance of the force, that those who are corrupted by its fateful gaze can even be empowered by the energy based weapons many choose to use to put them down. In this, it finds another of its ascended gifts, yet another thing for those to know its name to fear its presence.
1) The staff can manifest synthetic life, IE necromancy with no explanation on what are it's limits.
2) To top it off, these things can be enhanced in power by energy based weapons making them even more powerful. IE, so a blaster can make these things stronger.



The Slave said:
Dementophobia, or Theophobia? - ​When in the presence of the beast, meek men shall falter to their knees and praise their new lord. Quiet ramblings, the subtle hints of madness, all signs that those who have witnessed her glory have fallen at her feet. The Darkstaff is a weapon so capable in its inferno of unbridled power, so destructive in its mere stillness, that those who bear witness to its greatness risk falling to the uncontrollable depths of pure dementia. To lose ones sanity to the greatest of creations is to fall to something great, in the most uncouth way.
1) The staff can cause a version of Fear and Force Insanity.




The Slave said:
On The 7th Day - ​In truth, the greatest strength the Darkstaff may posses is its incarnate ability to change what is around it. From the ground one walks on, to the mountains they climb, to even the very beasts they meander past; those who wield its beautiful persona become God when he created creation itself. To edit, to change the natural order of things in a matter of seconds, to spit in the face of the artisan himself, is to sin in the highest regard; and to do so with such a wicked atrocity makes one forever damned in the eyes of the all seeing galaxy. In truth, even the simplest creation one could manifest with the staff could nearly dwarf the natural order of an entire planet; easily upsetting the balance of ecosystems fortified over millions of years. Manifesting the imagination in a moments notice at the strain of the user, or using it to amplify the users ability to alter at a far slower pace, this can effectively be used to become god when creating anything that lives and breathes. Challenging creation in its very own game, it is the absolute worst transgression to meet the eyes of god.
1) The staff can alter the environment.
2) the staff can corrupt the enviroment
3) you literally say that " this can effectively be used to become god when creating anything that lives and breathes. " You cannot become a god.



The Slave said:
Utilizing the strength of the broken staff requires the user to amplify their own strength through it, feeding their very essence into its jaws to create a swath of destruction behind them.
In your weakness you state that the user can amplify their own strength through it for a short time. This is still a strength.



What it can do:

1)Can remove any sense of the Force in an area round it.
2) The staff can possess an individual
3) The staff can create and project dark manifestations through dreams by controlling another body. So you can basically extend the use and power of this staff by controlling someone else.
4) The staff can manifest synthetic life, IE necromancy with no explanation on what are it's limits.
5) To top it off, these things can be enhanced in power by energy based weapons making them even more powerful. IE, so a blaster can make these things stronger.
6) The staff can cause a version of Fear and Force Insanity.
7) The staff can alter the environment.
8) the staff can corrupt the enviroment
9) you literally say that " this can effectively be used to become god when creating anything that lives and breathes. " You cannot become a god.


So your weaknesses are....

1) That this can drain the energy of the user even though it will boost the user's energy.
2) That love can break it? I didn't understand at all what your first weakness means.
3) That people who are strong enough with will power can over come it.
3) that an artifact of light can negate it's power to a degree
4) that those who have faced something similar can ignore it's call
5) that the person who uses may potentially die, get cut off from the force, or be trapped in the void?
6) and that it cannot hide it's presence?


See how this is unbalanced?

I can tell you what to remove, and that's fine, but my earlier request was made to give you the flexibility to go through this and whittle down to what you want to have that is the most important aspect of the Darkstaff without having me have to give you a specific outline on what to remove.

If you want an actual number, alright, break this down to three distinct things it can do.
 
Cira said:
This makes no sense. What exactly does this mean the staff can do?
It means it can eat people's essence, and with it force energy in general. From what I understand, it uses this to become more powerful; but to what extent is questionable considering how OP the device is to begin with.



Cira said:
So the staff can remove any sense of the Force in an area round it --- so if it does that then how does it work itself?

In truth, I think it is an ability it has that is 'toggled', something mentioned in the wiki itself. Regardless, I will remove this to better suit it to something balanced.



Cira said:
1) The staff can possess an individual 2) The staff can create and project dark manifestations through dreams by controlling another body. So you can basically extend the use and power of this staff by controlling someone else.

I believe those are the same thing, at least in the sense I meant them. Its 'dark and twisted dreams' was simply a hint at what it pushes onto others; effectively creating a device that can manipulate the bearer and others in a small vicinity around it. Something standard force powers already allow, but I'll edit this accordingly.



Cira said:
1) The staff can manifest synthetic life, IE necromancy with no explanation on what are it's limits. 2) To top it off, these things can be enhanced in power by energy based weapons making them even more powerful. IE, so a blaster can make these things stronger.

I'll remove this as well. The necromancy has nothing to do with what I want to do with the device, and the other is just sithspawn; which already is mentioned in a whole different strength.



Cira said:
1) The staff can cause a version of Fear and Force Insanity.

Again, not a combat thing; more a flavor text to define it when in an area. Its not an end all be all; just something that makes being around it 'uncomfortable' to say the least. Certainly not meant to be a militarized power by any means.



Cira said:
1) The staff can alter the environment. 2) the staff can corrupt the enviroment 3) you literally say that " this can effectively be used to become god when creating anything that lives and breathes. " You cannot become a god.

The Staff can alter the enviroment around it, just as the Force can. It is nothing more than an amplification to standard force powers; certainly nothing crazy. The 'corruption' thing was a play on words, and was certainly not meant to be taken literally. Also, the mention of 'becoming a god' is in reference to Genesis from the bible; when he created Adam and Eve, not 'becoming a god' in the omnipotent sense. In truth, the same word play could be used in relation to anything created from Sith Alchemy, but once more it was not my intention to imply it made one all powerful, only amplified.



Cira said:
In your weakness you state that the user can amplify their own strength through it for a short time. This is still a strength.

In truth, this is the only strength I intend to keep. Its 'manipulation' and so on and so forth is all reliant on the user, and in this case it would be The Slave who manifested the device to suit his needs. Amplifying strength through it isn't meant to be some 'short term' power, but a constant so long as it is wielded; in the same sense perhaps as a Kyber Crystal.



Cira said:
What it can do:
1)Can remove any sense of the Force in an area round it. [Removed]
2) The staff can possess an individual [Edited to be only the weak willed]
3) The staff can create and project dark manifestations through dreams by controlling another body. So you can basically extend the use and power of this staff by controlling someone else. [Same as the previous]
4) The staff can manifest synthetic life, IE necromancy with no explanation on what are it's limits. [Removed Necromancy, Manifest Life merged with another strength]
5) To top it off, these things can be enhanced in power by energy based weapons making them even more powerful. IE, so a blaster can make these things stronger. [Also Removed.]
6) The staff can cause a version of Fear and Force Insanity. [Not weaponized, just uncomfortable.]
7) The staff can alter the environment. [Not edited.]
8) the staff can corrupt the enviroment [No it can't.]
9) you literally say that " this can effectively be used to become god when creating anything that lives and breathes. " You cannot become a god. [No it can't, it was just a reference to Genesis from the bible.]


Cira said:
So your weaknesses are....
1) That this can drain the energy of the user even though it will boost the user's energy. [This is worded oddly. It tires the user out the more they use it, but make their power greater. Think a brighter flame burns faster.]
2) That love can break it? I didn't understand at all what your first weakness means. [It gets possessive, and slowly kills the user as they wield it. Not that love makes it weak.]
3) That people who are strong enough with will power can over come it. [Far easier when a light sided member of the force, but yes.]
3[.1]) that an artifact of light can negate it's power to a degree [Not to a degree, it can do it in its entirety if its strong enough.]
4) that those who have faced something similar can ignore it's call [Not actually mentioned anywhere, nor meant to be like that.]
5) that the person who uses may potentially die, get cut off from the force, or be trapped in the void? [All of the above, but more definite. Especially with strain.]
6) and that it cannot hide it's presence? [Also true. System wide.]

So, suffice to say, the three distinct things it can do is this;
  1. Amplifies Force Powers, especially over time
  2. Alters Environment (Micro and Macro)
  3. Possession of Others
The fear/insanity thing is a bit overstated, and more an aura type thing. Does this work for you?

[member="Cira"]
 
The Slave said:
It means it can eat people's essence, and with it force energy in general. From what I understand, it uses this to become more powerful; but to what extent is questionable considering how OP the device is to begin with.
Please set limit to how much it is able to become more powerful. Please put a cap on this.



The Slave said:
Manifesting the imagination in a moments notice at the strain of the user, or using it to amplify the users ability to alter at a far slower pace, this can effectively be used to become god when creating anything that lives and breathes. Challenging creation in its very own game, it is the absolute worst transgression to meet the eyes of god.

Please show that it takes time to alter an eco system of a planet, not a moments notice.


Weaknesses -- add in that this does not affect areas that are lacking in the force, ysalamiri, harder to work around Void stone items, unable to be mentally used against species with a natural mental resistance for being taken over, and that Battle Meditation, Force Light, or any other applicable power may be able to dampen or negate the Dark Staff's dark aura and manipulations.
 
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