Forging a new path.

[Garza]

Slowly I could feel the parts moving together. My eyes closed to allow my yellow saber to come together. Fitting in place slowly, yet correctly. I could feel each piece in my mind. With the meditation that I was preforming. The Lightsaber was hovering at my eye level, though I could not see it. my body felt strained as the last piece was placed into the cover of the saber. Hearing a click of the pieces staying together. I smiled. I lashed my hand out as I let my grip of the force fade from me. I caught my saber in my hand and letting it ignite in its brilliance. The hum comforted me. I then moved the saber to sit on the floor next to me.

I then stood up and walked over to a bag. Taking parts and pieces out of it. I wanted to create my own saber. I had the yellow one, and it has served it use, but I never really felt a connection with it. I wanted to create a different lightsaber so I could connect to it. So it would become my own item that I could call all myself. Everything else that I owned was loaned to me, or handed to me from past people. My ship, a 578-R space transport was really K1-LLR's ship, but she let me use it as my own.

As I was simply worked in the cargo hold. I attempted to create my second saber. Keyword: Attempted. I kept messing up, putting the wrong piece where it shouldn't be. Or even getting nowhere with the way that I was building it. The only reason I could do it with the yellow saber was because I had taken it apart and learned of the saber inside and out. I knew everything about the saber. Even the fact that whoever made it must have chipped the inside slightly as they cut it because of the rough edge of the cutting tool.

I shook my head and let my forehead slam into the counter trying to keep my cool. This was not very effective. Being a self purposed Jedi, I thought that I might be able to create my second saber by myself. I was wrong. Putting all the pieces back I zipped up the bag and set it where it belonged. I grabbed my yellow lightsaber as I exited the cargo hold. "K! Set a course to Courscant! I need to see the Jedi!"

TWO DAYS LATER
I smiled as I walked out of the ship. Carrying a bookbag on my back as I walked out in my Not so Jedi clothes. The half trench coat swaying in the wind with the open turtleneck as a breeze passed me by. I looked up at the Jedi temple that stood before me in all of its grandeur. I walked towards the Temple hoping to find a Jedi that may be able to help me create my lightsaber.

I walked up the steps of the Main gate. looking around I could see signs pointing to the training grounds. and the library when inside. I looked at the map for a possible meeting place where a Jedi may be to speak about lightsaber creation. Wondering the entire time, If K knew how to make one. If she did, there would be Hell to pay for her not speaking up.

Well not really because of me being a Jedi and all. I would just get angry at her, and maybe fight her like we usually did. She was a Proxy droid so it didn't matter if I stabbed her or anything. She could be fixed right up. with little effort. Ugh! I got sidetracked again! I shook my head and looked for the training rooms. Finding a cloven of them. I started to walk in that direction.

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

"Meditating again?"

I was interrupted again by that beautiful voice while I tried to meditate. The voice of my dearest friend, Kaira. I opened my eyes just to look at her in front of me in her Force Ghost form, wearing her Jedi clothes that she used for training, her long black hair and her dark skin. Pretty as she always was. I was sitting over the floor with my legs crossed, wearing my Jedi robes in a training room, she and I were the only ones there.

When I looked at her eyes sadness took over me, those eyes reminded me how I lost her over my arms. I could feel my chest in pain. Kaira smiled at me and said: "Why do you keep meditating if you know that you hate it so much?" I couldn't help it but to smile too, I knew that she wasn't here anymore, but being able to talk to her always gave me hope that she will return in one way or another, and if she doesn't return, to take this opportunity to enjoy the moment with her.

I said to her: "So that is why you always fought too much with your master, if you would only listen to me then your master would start to treat you better." I stood up after I said that and started to walk to the exit, Kaira started to follow me. While walking to the exit I continued talking to her: "Sometimes we had to do some things that we hate to be better, Kaira."

"I don't see how I would be better when I get ordered by the council to escort an important politician," said Kaira in a mocking way. That made me laugh, she was right, I couldn't see it either. When I was just stepping out the exit I said: "Me nei--"

Out of nowhere I ran unto someone, crashing in the process. How embarrassing, I even made him to drop the content from a bag that he was carrying.
"Sith spit! I'm really sorry!" He was a young man wearing a half black trench coat, we both started to pick the items that was dropped from the bag. That's when I started to recognize these little parts of a lightsaber. I heard Karia's very recognizable, mocking giggles. Holding some pieces in my hands I turned to look at Kaira, but she was already gone. I looked at the young man and he didn't notice Kaira's giggle, he was still putting away the rest of the lightsaber's part.

Very embarrased I extended my arms wanting to give him the parts that I got. "I am sorry for this mess." Then I awaited to be scold by him.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

I was walking to the different training rooms that I had taken careful note of the map. But even then, a map could never tell me how beautiful the Jedi temple would be. I had been here once before, but I was occupied with trying to keep my arm in my socket. I remembered Felicia as she dragged me halfway across the temple. And Cal just chuckling about it. I looked around myself as when suddenly I ran into someone. The man cursed the Sith and began to help pick up the pieces from my bag. I shook my head wondering who the man was talking to or looking at while he picked up the lightsaber pieces. Because I thought that the man was alone when he ran into me, unless he had some com link in his ear.

I nodded my head as he apologized. "It's okay man, we both ran into each other." I had picked up the last few pieces when I looked at the man. Red hair that was neatly cropped to a simple hair cut, dressed in robes. I offered my hand in wanting to introduce myself. "Xander, its okay man. It happens every once in a while." I took a moment and then decided to ask a question, me and my big mouth. "and um, who are you talking to?"

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

After finishing to picking up the mess, the young man offered his name. Xander it was, extending his hand. I grabbed his hand and introduced myself to him: "Odeyseis Dryar, Jedi knight." I was very glad that he wasn't upset about our little accident, in fact I was very glad that he understood. But then it came the question from Xander.

When he asked who I was talking to, I felt a nod in my throat. Started to see those painful images of Karia lifeless body. I snapped out of it and answered: "My dearest friend which is now part of the Force. I lost her many months ago, but she still here... Talking to me..." I entered again in those painful thoughts. I shook my head and continued: "I'm sorry, I don't really want to talk about."

I took another look at Xander and noticed his hilt, that's when I started to wonder what he was doing here. "If you don't mind asking, are you a Padawan in the temple? I don't recall seeing you in the temple."

I was betting that he was an outsider, but from where? Curiosity took over me.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

I nodded my head to the man as he introduced himself. It was a rather, well, weird name for me. And after he had answered my question, I knew somewhat of how he felt. I had no real family. I simply let the part of what I had asked alone. He then stopped himself and I knew that he noticed the hilt that was on my belt, rather than in the bracer that I wore on my right arm. I smiled as he asked if I was a padawan of the Temple. I raised my hand and made a So-so motion with it.

"I was here for a while, and then I went to the Fel Imperium. I just....." i looked around and stopped my self. I was confessing to a Jedi Knight that I didn't really like it here. and I tried to catch my words, but I had to spill them out. "I never really felt at home here. I felt like I was the third wheel here. In everyplace that I have gone, it has been that way, But with the Fel Imperium, I found my home." I shrugged my shoulders.

Really I liked the Fel. It was a place that was my Home. Maybe for some others it would be here. But even though I wanted so much to be a Jedi, but with how I was at the Jedi temple, It made me feel on edge for some reason that I could not explain.

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

When Xander explained why he didn't stay here in the Jedi Temple, I really understood how he felt. In my days with my old clan, my brother Antau and I felt that we weren't part of the Jedi clan, we felt that the clan didn't care about us, then we decided to left them, to look for something else, to give ourselves a meaning of being a Jedi. I decided to travel, to take a rest from everything, that's when I discover why I really wanted to be a Jedi, then I did not care anymore and started to understood my fellow Jedi. My brother instead he joined the path of the Dark Side for some time, joining a Sith cult that their objective was to destroy the Jedi by deceiving them thinking they were betraying themselves within their ranks, which they almost did to my clan. But Antau returned to the clan after some years had passed.

I watched Xander how his body language change, the feelings to be here again, wanted to be accepted. But after he said he found his home in the Fel Imperium, I could feel happiness for him that he found the meaning to be a Jedi somewhere where he can think he is being part of.

With a smile I told him: "The Force acts in very mysterious way, Xander. I had felt that same way you did in the days when I was a Padawan and at your age too, I took off from my Jedi clan to travel, to find a meaning of my Jedi life, and when I found it I felt the Force telling me to return to my old clan after some years. Sometimes the Jedi strive to make a better galaxy that we forget to watch over our own friends, to see if they are alright, to help them to be better. I'm really glad that the Force told you that your home was with the Fel Imperium."

I meant that, and when I finished talking I felt that Xander needed help with something, that's when I told him: "And you are here seeking help, aren't you?"
If I was right, I would help him as any way I can, after all he is a Padawan in need, and Padawans always need some guidance in one way or another.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

I payed very close attention to the man as he spoke of the force. Being something that would act in or against my favor. I didn't see it that way. I saw the force as a tool to be used and to be implemented in helping the Galaxy as a whole. Not a living entity that can decide if I am a Jedi or not. Though I wouldn't really tell that to Odeyseis' face. That does not mean that I would wholly agree with him.

His entire body spoke the truth to his words as he made his rendition of how he had somewhat traveled the same path that I have. And I could agree with him, but he has not the experience of not having someone to care or one to love back in anyway. I had no family, that was the difference between the both of us. There was a slight pause as I tried to think about what I should say when the question came up if I needed any help. I smiled and nodded my head.

"Yeah.... I am looking for help in putting together my own saber. Ya'see I have one already, but its not mine own. and so I feel like I need to have one thing that belongs soulfully to myself." I took the book bag off of my shoulders and held it in my hands. "I have the items, other than a crystal, but I can't figure out how to put it all together. Its weird because I can take apart my first saber, but I only learned how to do so by taking it apart when I first got it. I don't know how to make a completely new one."

I looked up at the man. And having a feeling that he may help me I went ahead and asked. "You wouldn't mind helping a fellow adventurer?" I could not really say Jedi because I was only proclaimed to be one because of my wanting to be good. Rather than the fact that I had a feeling that I should not be with the Jedi.

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

"Let me have a look..."

I said to Xander, asking to let me see his backpack with all the lightsaber componets. I was remembering how to build a lightsaber by seeing the components, that's when I remembered when I built my first and only lightsaber, taking the test of knowledge at the same time, being watched over some of the council members and my former master, Twinlik, when I was at my old clan. I was so nervous back then, but when I watched other Padawans taking the test and building the lightsaber, they made it look easy.

Everything was there, except for the crystal, which of course it was one of the important parts of the lightsaber. "You said that it still needs a crystal, right?" The crystal was the hardest part to incorporate, when the Jedi was building their first lightsaber they needed to channel the Force to the crystal, meditating for days.

 

[Garza]

I handed the bag over to Odeyseis when he asked. He looked through the items that I had, and on his face I could see him as he may have had flashbacks of how his live was when he made his own lightsaber. I could only smile as he did so. Really I hoped that he remembered how to make his lightsaber because I needed help in creating my own. Then now my yellow one would become my backup or be used when I decided to practice Jar'kai. I remembered how I had taken a Sith apprentices saber from him and then used it against him. It had helped me to survive, but I can't always rely on the other person having a weapon that I can take.

He then asked the question, well more so wanted me to confirm about my not having a lightsaber crystal. Nodding my head as I spoke, "Yes, kind of. I have a training saber with a blue crystal back at my ship, but that is for training, and I feel as though the color blue does not match for me." Even though I was aggressive in my attacking, much like a guardian, I had the mindset of a Sentinel that used a mix of powers and lightsaber skills. I had no real powers to speak of, but my powers of detailed thought, and precise examination are what I used to win fights and battles.

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

"Well, the only way to know what is the thing that you are doing wrong is watching you construct the lightsaber..." I thought watching him would help me to see exactly what is the problem, but first...

"But let's not forget about the crystal then, we could travel to get one for you. I heard Ilum is one of the planets that provides crystals for lightsabers, lucky for you is in Republic space. Or you could make a synthetic one. Is your choice." I really wasn't familiar with synthetic crystals, but in my clan there was students using the furnace to make those, taking some times days to shape it as they desire it.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

I smile and nodded my head as he told me that I would have to try and put together the parts. That way he could see what I was doing wrong, and I could learn myself with the aid of Odeyseis. Taking back the bag I put it on my back and then looked up as he asked about the crystal and what I wanted to do. I thought about it. Just finding a crystal would be easy and it would just be a color of my choosing. but I wanted this saber to be MINE. not just something that I happen to make.

"I'll create one." I said to him with the utmost confidence. "But where can we go to create this lightsaber?"

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

Now that was the question, wasn't it? Where Xander would construct his lightsaber? I was taught that the lightsaber it was a part of the Jedi, that's why they made me to take the test of knowledge while constructing it, to make it as my own, to feel that I achieve something. I took the test in one of the Massasi Temples back in Yavin 4 where there was a great aura of the Force to meditate, to feel the calmness of the place and to feel how I constructed my lightsaber, not with my hands, but with the Force.

"When I built my lightsaber, I was in a place where the Force resonated, where I could find calmness. But then again, that was my first time when I constructed it, I made my saber a part of myself thanks to the test." I started to walk to the opposite direction where Xander came saying: "You might want to come this way to the furnaces, to create your crystal first."

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

His head nod told me that he didn't have a place for us to be yet. And that was fine with me. I had nowhere to go today, well really at anytime because I could go anywhere I wanted. I nodded my head as he led me back from where I had come, saying that I would probably want to create my crystal first. Really that was fine with me. I had heard about how creating a synith-crystal usually turned out red, but that there was a chance that when in the creation process, it would be the color that lies within your heart and soul. Being forged purely of who you are.

My mind raced on what color I would get. Black because I am not a Jedi, or red just because I am known for aggression. Blue because of my wanting to protect people. Yellow or orange because of my thoughts of a Sentinel. Maybe a color that is rarely seen! ether would be good. as long as it was the crystal that I created, then I would love it none the less.

"Alright sounds good."

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

Walking down the halls, I was thinking where Xander and I could go to construct his lightsaber. I was thinking seriously to go to Yavin IV, but last time I heard that it was in Mandalorian space, or we could go to Tython, there lies another Jedi Temple, but there the Force echoed more than here in Coruscant. I decided to ask later Xander after he made his crystal.

We arrived at the door, behind the door there was the furnaces. I never had to built my own crystal since my old master gave me the yellow crystal of my lightsaber, but I had heard that it gets very hot in the furnaces room, and it was meant to make the Jedi to stand the heat, to use the Force to make him stronger. I took a look through the little crystal on the door and there was nobody, I turned to Xander and said to him: "I'll hold your bag while you are in there, since it is hot and we don't want the lightsabers parts to overheat a little to much. Right in there there's the materials you need to start doing your crystal in one of the furnaces. Remember, it is too hot in there so you can make the crystal quicker than usual, but you need to let the Force flow through you to protect you from the heat and, at the same time, to mold your crystal, and with that the crystal will be imbued with your aura of the Force."

I wasn't sure if he knew what to do, but I was ready to help him in any way I can. "I'll wait for you right here, if you have any question or need some help, you can ask me." I said to Xander, wanting to reassure him.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

I looked up at the man as he led me to a room. He told me of how it would be hot in there. and of how that I will need to focus on the crystal. Nodding my head I handed the bag over to him. "You may want to go and eat, because this may take a while." I turned to the door and opened it. Letting the heat of the room wash over me. Already I knew this would be hard, but none the less, I must continue. Taking off my jacket as I walked in. The door closed behind me.

Inside was a furnace. it looked to be made for the advancement of crystals. Having a place for the crystal to grow. I had heard that these crystals that were made by the force could be very powerful for the user. and as such I began to work on my crystal. I paid attention to the machine, getting everything prepped. Turning the dial on the machine I began the process of making my crystal.

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

I took his bag and mused myself: I hope not. I hoped too that Xander will be alright. I looked inside the bag again and I decided to build it to see if everything fitted as it should while Xander is in there. In a telekinetic way I took out all the contents from the bag making all the lightsaber's part to float in the air. I analyzed each part, taking my time to see where it should be fitted in the hilt.

First, the cell power, then the lens, then... I was thinking myself, trying to remember the procedure, almost everything fitted until...

Hmm? Strange. Something was not fitting, like if something was missing to connect everything. It didn't occur to me until it hit me.

That is why he was having problems... I thought, I dissembled the lightsaber and put everything back to the bag and waited for Xander to finish his crystal.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

I took a hold of the handle on the door of the machine. Staring into the chamber where the crystal may reside. I looked to realize that there was no way for me to just stand there and let the crystal form. I took a few steps back. And sat myself down on the warm floor. It had been about a half an hour since I had first walked into the room. Now just barely dressed with only my pants on. I folded my legs under me and closed my eyes. Just like I did with the saber that belonged to me.

My mind them moved. Spreading out to not just the machine and myself, but all the components in the room. Feeling each of them. I focused on the crystal that I didn't just want, or need. But I lothed after the crystal. Each and every fiber of my being seemed to be at a stand still as I sat there focusing. Pushing. With all of my might and power I pushed to create the crystal.

My eyes were black as I looked into the back of my eyelids. And slowly did they paint a picture for me to see. Only being images at first. They were of a young boy, fighting with a Training saber. Practicing to the point where he was almost perfect. But he was beaten. The image of the boy falling over and over again showed me years and years of being hit down, and taking hit after hit. He was now a young adult, about my age. Wielding a lightsaber now. Yellow as the same of mine, He spoke, and now I could hear voices. Speaking all at once. One from him, and another from the other child that had beaten him many times. Only now were they making a Knighting ceremony, and as the boy entered the room, He was confronted by his Masters. Each had slain one of his childhood friends.

He had to escape he had to run. and as he did. It showed a lapse in time. As the boy in robes ran from the masters he once trusted, Faces flew by of others that I had not seen and then the image was cut in half by a blue saber. It was the boy once more, only this time, grown up and dressed in Mandalorian Neo Crusader armor. He fought against many, and won. Then he kissed a purely white woman. It then slowed down to fade into black. The darkness of my eyelids came to be once more in my vision. Wanting to know more, wanting to see more.

Only when I looked up did I see inside the machine a lightsaber crystal. Glowing in its ever so brilliant light of purity. The white crystal shimmered once as I stood up. The room felt cold now. Even though I sweat still. Opening the door, I looked at the crystal. Daring myself to touch it. My right hand reaching for it as though it were a gift from a god. I touched it for my hands to begin to burn. I reeled back in pain. Hissing at myself. Looking at the crystal once more, I reached out for a second time.

I pushed myself to hold past the pain of the burning as I wrapped my fingers around the crystal. My arm shook as I tried to keep my mouth silent. And when I did finally yell, No sound came from my mouth. I crushed my hand around the crystal trying to break it so that the burning would stop. And only then did I get a calm in my mind. I closed my mouth letting the pain continue. I pushed with the force against the crystal. Using everything that I had, wne when that was done. I flashed once more into my mind.

I could see the man standing there with his armor and blue saber. In the background fading was the woman from his life. Suddenly I had an attachment to her. As though I knew her. She then spoke to me. Calling me by name. "Xander, look for me." Her face faded to the man once more. Kissing the woman again but she was different from the other girl. "Search for me." I nodded my head and tried to speak back but I could not say anything. It then became black again.

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

It had passed five minutes since I took a look at Xander's future lightsaber and now I was looking at my personal datapad that I always take it anywhere with me. Looking at the list of planets that I haven't searched on them Naga Sadow's holocron. Each planet had their own notes made by myself, what I have to consider before I took off to the planets.

While I was sinking on my thoughts, I could feel the Force flowing inside the room of the furnaces, I took a look inside through the little window and I saw Xander sitting over the floor, having his legs crossed.

"What do you think of him?" I turned to the source of the voice and stared at Kaira, still in her Force Ghost form now in her robes, then I said to her: "I don't know. What do you think of him?"
"I think he is a lonely person."

I started to walk to a bench near the furnace room, then took a sit. Kaira followed then, sat right next to me and said: "Actually he reminds me of you when I met you for the first time." When I heard that, I had flashbacks when I met Kaira. I was sitting in one of the council member's lecture in class, then she came in to the room, with all her beauty and all her shyness.

"Yes... I only had my brother, but in that time he was in the path of the darkside." I stopped looking at her then I recalled the time when Kaira and I grew a strong bond with the passing of each day. Then I remembered when the chaos happened, Seyfra destroying my clan, and Kaira. I looked again into her eyes and said to her: "I miss you."

She smiled at me and said: "You might want to check on him..."

I looked at the door then approached to it, just to see Xander on the floor. I thought he passed away because of the heat, I entered and checked to see if Xander was still alive. When I knew that he was alive, I relaxed, grabbed him and took him to the temple's medbay. Xander was going to be alright, he just needed some rest. When I left him there, the medical personnel gave me something that he was holding on his hand.

I looked at it and realized that it was Xander's new lightsaber white crystal. So, you made it, I mused myself. I decided to wait in the medbay until he regained counciousness.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

 

[Garza]

Visions flashed by of people that I had never seen before. A man in full armor with a blue lightsaber, then a man dressed in a Dark robe with some amulet around his neck. A purely white woman who held a dual saber in her hands. And then a girl, looking much like the taller woman, only that she had the attributes of both the parents. I then saw a young man. Dirty blonde hair and a devilish smile that was in the holo. They laughed about something. I don't know what. I then felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see that the woman in the holo, was also behind me. She spoke, yet no words entered my ears. I tried to read her lips, and All I could get was "We.... go.... now." I looked to see a man, human as far as I could tell. Dressed in Jedi robes, and holding a saber in his hand.

Pressing the saber against my chest, he then pressed a few buttons. and from his lips I could read. "I.... you." I could see tears in the man's eyes. as well as the woman's. I tried to touch them and ask what was wrong. A glass canister around me closed, and began to fill with some warm liquid. I banged up against the glass with my tiny hands. How do I have tiny hands? looking into the glass I could see a reflection of myself. Only like when I was two years ago. As the warm liquid rose above my head, all went to black.

I could slowly hear beeps of some machine coming from beside me. Off to the right I could feel cold hands touching my wrists. Then they left me, and the machine was gone. I felt in a daze as every sound that I could hear was distorted, as though they, whoever they were, was slowed down. I felt myself drift off once more. into the darkness of my mind.

What seemed only seconds later, I could feel nothing. I felt empty, and slightly sore. I felt a pang in my hand, but nothing more. I could see a light piercing my eyelids. And slowly did I move. Opening my eyes as I could see the ceiling. I heard others moving about, and a few whimpers from what could be someone being treated for a wound. My vision was blurry at best. and slowly did it clear up. I moved my hands to cover my eyes. Letting the light slowly fade into my eyes. Getting finally adjusted to the bright lights. I looked to my right.

Seeing a man that I had met earlier, I could not tell what he was doing, but with the effort that I could, I spoke in a hoarse voice, as though I had been constantly screaming. "What happened?"

@[member="Odeyseis"]

 

[Odeyseis]

"What happened?"

I was interrupted again while looking at my datapad, but not by Kaira, but by Xander. I turned to see Xander, with his hand banded. I gave him a smile and answered: "You've passed out while you were making your crystal. I think the heat was too much to bear." I looked down and said: "I'm sorry... I didn't know this was going to happen. I feel guilty about to put you through this."

While I was waiting for Xander to regain counciousness, I could feel something was disturbing Xander. Then I asked away: "You were asleep for some hours, and I could feel the Force taking over you. Did you stumble upon something while you were asleep?" To be honest, he even mumbled something in his sleep, but his aura of the Force that was being disturbed in his sleep that made me to be concerned about him.

@[member="Xander Carrick"]

I didn't really expect to be answered if Xander didn't want to, but I was bound to help him since I put him through the pain of making him to build his lightsaber without preparing him. I wanted to pay back because of my mistake.